


Here I Am (Signed, Sealed, Delivered)

by freshtilapia



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: A host of minor characters, Deaf!Tobin, F/F, JJ has no lines, KO appears in latter chapters but removed from the last chapter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-18
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-02-08 13:36:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 104,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21476875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/freshtilapia/pseuds/freshtilapia
Summary: After more than a year of struggling to find a job due to her hearing impairment, Tobin reluctantly takes her best friend’s suggestion of moving to LA, taking a special driver’s ed program, and working as a home delivery driver.She’s grateful for finally having a full-time job. And she’s about to be even more grateful for a certain Channing Press, online shopping addict.
Relationships: Tobin Heath/Christen Press
Comments: 616
Kudos: 1382





	1. I can read lips

**Author's Note:**

> It's been years since I was really inspired to complete a fic (it was way back in LJ!) but I just couldn't get the thought of a super cute Tobin doing sign language off my mind. The whole story just came to me. So I started writing again. Thanks to mjacton, lucianafromnaples, and a work bff for reading this in advance.
> 
> And thanks to you for clicking. I hope you enjoy reading :)

This feels like the end of the road, Tobin thinks, no matter how much she wishes it weren’t.

She’s been to countless office buildings, hotel ballrooms, and convention halls like this one for over a year, always dressed for success in her favorite slacks, white button up shirt, and blazer, with her hair pulled up neatly into a ponytail, yet she hasn’t made any breakthroughs.

For most people, job hunting sucks. But it sucks even more for Tobin.

She anticipates the sympathetic smiles, the dismissive looks, variations of “We’ll call you,” or worse, “I’m so sorry but…” She’s sure this job fair won’t be any different than the others she has attended.

But, at least, this one gives out a sticker at registration that Tobin is expected to stick to her blazer with _Hi! My name is_ printed at the very top.

Looking around, she sees hundreds of people milling about, thinks this is one of those rare times where she welcomes the silence, takes a deep breath, and writes her name.

_ Tobin Heath _

And with a heavy sigh, she adds...

_ I’m deaf _

*

Tobin pours out her frustration in a string of texts to her best friend Lauren the next day. And she receives a simple reply.

[Lauren]  
_ Have you thought more about _  
_ what I said last month? _

This topic is really where this conversation is supposed to go… because Lauren Cheney, who has been living in Los Angeles for about a year and working at UCLA as part of their strength and conditioning staff, has also been researching opportunities for Tobin for months. 

And last month is when word gets around campus about a start-up by UCLA alums that focuses solely on training and hiring women, including women with hearing loss.

[Tobin]  
_ ShipX? _  
_ Yeah I have actually _  
_ Spoke to my mom about it yesterday _

[Lauren]  
_ And? _  
_ What did she say? _

[Tobin]  
_ Said it’s up to me _  
_ That they’ll support me no matter what _

[Lauren]  
_ So what do you say _  
_ Wanna take a chance on the city of angels? _

Tobin hesitates as she types her next messages.

She’s not exactly unemployed. She has been working part-time as a contributing writer for an online health magazine, where she can at least use her Journalism degree (sort of). And she receives supplemental income for her disability.

Her family has always been nurturing. They aren’t poor by any means. But Tobin craves independence.

[Tobin]  
_ I just want a full time job _  
_ But _

While she often seems easygoing, looking too cool for school, her self esteem has taken quite a hit after hundreds of job application rejections. 

[Tobin]  
_ Do you really think I can do it? _

[Lauren]  
_ I have no doubt in my mind _  
_ You’re one of the best drivers I know _  
_ You’re athletic _  
_ You can lift 75 lbs for sure _  
_ You’ve always been focused _  
_ And determined _  
_ And brave _

[Tobin]  
_ Keep going _

[Lauren]  
_ And an ass apparently _

[Tobin]  
_ Lol _

[Lauren]  
_ Seriously you can do it!!! _

Tobin can’t help but smile and feel hopeful and grateful for her best friend since middle school.

[Tobin]  
_ Thank you _

[Lauren]  
_ Do you still have the link I sent you? _

[Tobin]  
_ Yep _

[Lauren]  
_ Okay _  
_ Don’t forget to put my address in your app form _

[Tobin]  
_ I won’t forget mom _

[Lauren]  
_ And eat your vegetables! _

Tobin chuckles as she starts looking for her laptop.

*

Five months go by in a blur.

One moment Tobin is fist-pumping in the living room of her childhood home after receiving her offer letter, the next moment she’s eating celebratory tacos with her cohort near LAX after successfully completing their four-month training.

In between, she dissuades her parents from buying her a secondhand car (but not from buying her plane ticket—round trip, open return). Her older sisters tell her she’s insane. Lauren guarantees they’ll be living close enough to the cargo terminal where Tobin will work and that she’ll get by. (Tobin just doesn’t want to add gas and car insurance to her expenses to be honest.)

She learns that ShipX serves as a contractor for two big name delivery service companies and she’ll be assigned to one as a supplemental driver.

And, all things considered, she thinks she’s settling in nicely to her new life with Lauren as her roommate.

Not having a lot of stuff and only bringing the essentials certainly makes moving in easier. It also helps that their two-bedroom apartment is semi-furnished and Lauren’s former roommate leaves small appliances behind.

They live near the border of Inglewood and South Los Angeles, more than half a mile from the nearest bus stop, which Tobin doesn’t mind. 

One whole day after she arrives in LA, they go on an excursion, commuting to Tobin’s workplace and back, then trekking to grocery stores, pharmacies, the nearest hospital, and other places Tobin might need to get to on her own.

On Sundays, they do touristy stuff, driving to the beaches and around downtown in Lauren’s car. And on Mondays, Tobin writes her articles.

By some miracle, she doesn’t get homesick even though she’s away from her family for the very first time. 

Her mom assures her that she can come home whenever.

Tobin hopes that she can get through this, with just Lauren’s support, as she heads into her first week at work.

*

She starts on a Tuesday and gets partnered with Dave, a kindhearted burly man, for a whole week of work shadowing.

The company allows her to have a phone with her so that she can talk with Dave but just for the week. 

Armed with a speech-to-text app and a text-to-speech app, Tobin learns that he has been promoted to some sort of manager after working directly for the delivery giant for five years. And Tobin is about to take over the route he’s been handling for the past two years.

“Don’t let the fact that you’ll be clocking in more miles than the others get you down,” he tells her with a smile. “This is a really nice route, I promise.”

Tobin nods and smiles at him in appreciation and keeps doing it all day as he regales her with humorous anecdotes, introduces her to the customers answering their doors, and shares necessary tidbits. 

“Mrs. O’Connell—we call her Mrs. O—loves her flowers. Don’t ever park near them.”

They drive through one gated community after another.

“Packages for señor Jon Aguirre are almost always expensive and fragile.”

Tobin tries to commit each house to memory but it’s proving to be difficult. They all seem to have manicured lawns and big front yards.

The huge two-storey house they’re standing in front of isn't as flashy as the others though. And after ringing the doorbell, Dave supplies another tidbit.

“Expect to deliver a package here every week for Channing Press.”

Tobin nods for the nth time.

“She’s become a bit of a shopaholic—started this year,” Dave chuckles. “And if no one answers the door in a few minutes, we can leave the package. I’ve done it before and spoken to her about it.”

Once they’re back in the van, she types a question in her app. 

A robotic female voice asks, “What… about… dogs?”

Dave laughs, “Don’t get me started about dogs.”

They talk about the dogs on their route the whole afternoon.

*

The next day, Dave surprises Tobin by asking her to teach him how to sign _thank you_ and _you’re welcome_.

Tobin beams. 

They exchange phone numbers after that and Tobin teaches him new words and phrases every day for the rest of the week.

*

_ How was your week?_ Lauren signs after plopping down on the couch beside Tobin.

_ Pretty cool_, Tobin answers. _Tiring. But cool… Dave’s been really nice to me. But I’ll be on my own starting this week._

_ I’m sure you’ll do just fine_, Lauren assures her.

_ I think so too_, Tobin admits.

“Good,” Lauren nods.

She is what Tobin refers to as a hearing person but she’s been learning sign language since middle school and it’s one of the reasons why they’re best friends.

Lauren is a stately, tall, no-nonsense woman, with curly hair and kind, blue eyes. 

Next to her, Tobin looks like a goofy (but pretty) teenager even though Lauren is only a couple of months older.

They’re eating cereal for breakfast, watching TV on the couch, before heading to Sunday Mass.

_ So what do you want to do today? _ Lauren asks. _Want to finally go to Griffith Observatory?_

Tobin shakes her head, _Can we just chill today? Do laundry and stuff?_

_ Okay then_, Lauren acquiesces. _What about Thursday?_ _What do you want to do for your birthday?_

Tobin groans, _Do we have to celebrate?_

Lauren laughs, _That’s up to you… It’s okay if you don’t want to… We can talk about it again later. Who knows? Maybe you’ll find something new to celebrate this week._

*

Tobin doesn’t care about turning 26. But she does have plenty of reasons to celebrate, including having a comfy uniform to work in.

As a supplemental driver, Tobin doesn’t wear the easily recognizable bright-colored company polo shirt. 

Instead, she has a simple charcoal gray one tucked into black shorts (with pockets!), which she prefers over pants, with black sneakers and black socks rumpled just below her calves and with the company logo on the shirt as the only dash of color.

There’s a logo cap, too, which she brings along but never wears, opting to just put her hair up in a ponytail.

Tobin doesn’t care about how she looks either. But she has always been inherently cool and can effortlessly pull off an outfit as dull as a delivery driver’s uniform. She only has to smile and it won’t really matter what she’s wearing.

She’s been smiling all morning as she follows Dave’s final advice to have a bit of fun on her first solo outing, assigning nicknames to customers to best remember them by.

Her next delivery is for Shopaholic—not a very creative nickname, she knows, but Tobin hasn’t met her yet so it’ll do for now.

The IDs and house keys on her lanyard bounce off her stomach as she jogs towards the back of her van.

She opens the back door, brings out her scanner and her phone (which needs to be with the packages and not anywhere near the driver’s seat when she’s driving), and then Shopaholic’s order.

She expects to leave it by the door again. But shortly after ringing the bell, the knob turns and the door opens slowly… then a young woman on crutches comes into view.

Tobin immediately notices her eyes—red and watery, undoubtedly from crying—and is at a loss for what to do next.

She settles for what she hopes is a sympathetic smile as the young woman carefully opens the door wide.

She has beautiful olive skin and is wearing a loose tank top and jersey shorts, with her frizzy hair in a messy bun. 

Tobin thinks they’re around the same age and is curious about the crutches and—now that she can see it—the brace on her left knee.

Then the woman speaks but Tobin doesn’t catch what she says.

Acting on instinct, Tobin points to the recipient name, Channing Press, as she hands over the package and the other woman readily takes it.

Tobin then removes the stylus from the scanner, hands it off to the other woman, holds the device for her to sign, and smiles softly when she’s given back the stylus.

They both reach for the doorknob at the same time but Tobin gets to it quicker. Then she motions for the other woman to go inside, hoping she’ll understand that Tobin is volunteering to close the door for her.

It seems like she does when Tobin catches her saying, “Thank you.”

Tobin smiles again, a bit sheepishly this time, as she waits for the other woman to move back inside before closing the door.

Trotting back to the van with mixed emotions, Tobin decides to change her nickname to Sad Cutie.

*

The night before her birthday, Tobin requests Lauren to drive her to Party City.

She buys silly party kits, decorations, and other party supplies in the guise of throwing a fun birthday party.

*

She wears a unicorn party hat on her next delivery to Sad Cutie and is rewarded with bright eyes and an amused smile.

Tobin is glad that, this morning, she can simply refer to her as Cutie.

She takes a green-colored party horn from her pocket, blows on it, and Cutie laughs.

Tobin’s pretty sure she has a self-satisfied smirk on her face as she keeps the blowout pressed between her lips.

Alas, they can’t just smile at each other the whole day, so they go through the motions of delivering and receiving the package.

Like the week before, Tobin gestures for Cutie to go back inside, watches her hop backwards on her crutches, and reaches for the doorknob.

They lock eyes as Tobin starts pulling on the door.

And just before she loses her from view, Tobin blows the party horn one more time, eliciting a fresh set of giggles from Cutie, who shakes her head and grins as the door shuts.

*

A week later, Cutie is all smiles when she emerges from behind the door on her crutches to face a Batman-kiddie-masked Tobin, who cheerfully hands her the stylus and holds out the scanner for her to sign.

She promptly writes her signature, returns the stylus, and is about to take the package when Tobin notices her lips moving.

Tobin quickly removes her mask. And confusion must be written on her face because Cutie gives her a kind smile and says, “I asked for your name.”

_ Oh_.

Tobin steps closer, shows Cutie her company ID, and misses the baffled look on her face before she reads the name on the card.

“Tobin.”

_ That’s me_, Tobin smiles and points at the middle of her chest.

“Are you,” Cutie hesitates, “not allowed to speak or something?”

Tobin winces before leaning in again to show Cutie another card at the back of her ID—the one that says _Driver is deaf_.

“Oh.” 

It takes a moment before Cutie turns to her, looking perplexed. 

“So then… how can you understand me?”

_ One moment_, Tobin gestures before checking her pockets for her phone.

She finds it, takes it out, opens her text-to-speech app, and types. Cutie hears the robotic female voice soon after.

“I… can… read… lips.”

Cutie gapes at her in wonderment, “You can?”

Tobin nods with a smile, then realizes that she stares at Cutie’s lips a second too long and shifts her gaze back to Cutie’s eyes. 

Judging from the way Cutie’s eyes twinkle, it seems that she’s been caught. And Tobin doesn’t want to embarrass herself further so she makes a move towards the door. 

Cutie stops her with a hand on her forearm, waits for her full attention, then mouths, “Thank you.”

For a moment, they just smile softly at each other… until Tobin types on her app again to reply with, “My… pleasure,” waves Cutie inside and trails after her, only stopping once Cutie limps past the door.

Cutie faces her again then slowly mouths, “See you next week, Tobin.”

Tobin nods and waves adorably as she closes the door. 

Then she pauses at the doorstep, takes a deep breath, and places a hand over her heart.

*

For several seconds, Tobin stands there, in her dog ears headband, open-mouthed and goggle-eyed, when Cutie appears, beaming, with her hair down, side-swept and flowing in curls.

Oh, forget ‘Cutie.’ Tobin might as well start calling her ‘Her Hotness.’

She strikes a pose, as if to say, _Look, no crutches!_

And Tobin gives her two thumbs up and a toothy grin then internally cringes at her lameness.

Her Hotness just giggles.

And there’s a playful glint in her eyes when she begins signing, _Hi, my name is C-h-r-i-s-t-e-n_.

Once again, Tobin stands there, open-mouthed and goggle-eyed at Her Hotness—Christen.

By some miracle, Tobin musters the courage to offer Christen her most charming smile as she clips the parcel between her knees and signs, _Nice to meet you, C-pretty_.

Christen gives her a questioning look but signs, _Nice to meet you_, so Tobin takes out her phone and types for robotic girl to say, “We… don’t… spell… out… names… all… the… time.”

Then Tobin signs, _My name_, and then the letter T, which she taps on either side of her lips.

Christen mimics the hand movement, asking, “That means Tobin?”

Tobin nods, gestures at her big smile, and shrugs.

Christen laughs, “You do have a nice smile.” But before Tobin can blush at the compliment, Christen adds, “What about me,” pointing to herself, with furrowed brows, then tries to replicate what Tobin has done with the letter C in front of her face.

Tobin giggles, shakes her head, then zips her lips.

“Hey,” Christen gives her a playful shove and pouts, “not fair.”

Tobin giggles some more before remembering her job and hands over the packet to Christen, then points at the recipient name, Channing Press.

_ My s-i-s-t-e-r_, Christen signs.

_ Oh_, Tobin mouths.

“Yeah…”

Staring into each other’s eyes with soft smiles is becoming a habit.

Tobin is the first to budge and gestures at the door. 

But Christen shakes her head, “I can manage.” 

Tobin signs, _O-k_.

Then Christen adds, “No more accessories next week, okay?”

And Tobin nods.

With the sweetest of smiles, Christen says, “See you next week, Tobin.”

Tobin’s heart is affluter as she replies, _See you next week, C-pretty_.

When Tobin glances at the side mirror, Christen is still standing at her doorstep with her head turned to the van.

*

Of all the daydreams Tobin has indulged herself in about what’ll happen on the next delivery, this isn’t one of them.

A tall handsome man greets her when she arrives at Christen’s. And apparently, he can sign. 

_ Hello, you must be T-o-b-i-n. I’m N-i-m-a_, he smiles warmly then offers his hand. 

Tobin forces a smile, shakes his hand, and responds with, _Nice to meet you, N-i-m-a_, then asks,_ Is Miss P-r-e-s-s here?_

_ You mean C-pretty?_ Nima smirks.

The color instantly drains from Tobin’s face but she gets a reprieve because Nima suddenly turns around and Christen appears from inside the house and limps towards them.

Tobin can’t read what Christen’s lips are saying from that distance yet but she sees Nima hold his hands up and shake his head.

Christen smiles when she meets her gaze then signs, _Good morning, Tobin_.

Tobin notices Christen saying, “Shut up, Nima,” before greeting her back, _Good morning_.

_ How are you?_ Christen asks.

If Tobin is surprised that Christen has picked up more words in sign language, she tries not to show it when she replies, _I’m fine_.

She also tries not to think about Nima being the reason why Christen is better at it.

She tries harder not to feel mortified at the thought of Christen already knowing the meaning of the sign name Tobin has given her.

She tries all of those but fails in two out of the three.

She also fails to notice the look on Christen’s face when she reaches them and Tobin promptly hands over the package, which Christen immediately tosses over to Nima before taking the stylus.

She doesn’t fail to notice that Nima is moving closer and closer to Christen.

And for some reason—except, perhaps, to torture Tobin even more—Christen holds Tobin’s hand that’s holding the scanner as she signs… Then she elbows Nima in the ribs before returning the stylus to Tobin, who jerks her head in his direction and sees another smirk there.

“Don’t mind him,” Christen tells her.

But Tobin can’t bring herself to nod.

_ See you next week?_ Christen asks.

Tobin gives her a tight-lipped smile.

_ Have a nice day_, Nima signs.

_ Have a nice day_, Tobin signs before rushing back to the van.

This job should’ve come with a warning not to have crushes on pretty customers, Tobin thinks, especially unattainable ones.

She catches a glimpse of both of them still standing by the doorway as she drives away.

*

_ What’s with the long face?_ Lauren asks Tobin as they sit on the couch to eat Chinese take-out for dinner that day.

_ Nothing_, Tobin denies.

_ Clearly, it’s not nothing_, Lauren retorts.

Tobin takes a deep breath and lets out a grumbling exhale. Then she opens her takeout box and starts eating.

_ Do you think it’s time we got a dining table?_ Lauren asks. _We look pathetic_, she remarks before grabbing her food.

They eat slowly, without chatting for a while, until Tobin signs, _I feel pathetic_.

Lauren makes a show of setting down her takeout box on the coffee table, folding her legs on the couch to face Tobin, and waiting… 

Tobin turns to her with puppy eyes and Lauren tries her best not to smile.

_ There’s this girl_, Tobin confesses.

“Ahh…” 

Tobin covers her face with both hands before telling Lauren all about the prettiness that greets her every Tuesday for more than a month now.

She signs so animatedly for what feels like an hour that Lauren can no longer suppress her grin and Tobin shoves her a couple of times.

*

When the next Tuesday morning rolls around, Tobin isn’t sure whether to feel relieved or disappointed when she doesn’t find an item for Channing Press after she’s done loading her van.

*

Wednesday turns out to be a very trying day.

Tobin rings the doorbell to Jon Aguirre Gonzales’ stunning home, all modern and sleek and rectangular, with floor to ceiling glass windows on the second floor. And she thinks it’s quite fitting for a man whose delivery items are almost always expensive or fragile.

She holds the small but heavy box gingerly and waits… 

Pretty soon, she detects a faint smell of something burning. She goes back to her parked van just to be sure… but it’s not it.

The odor becomes more pronounced as she heads back to the front door. It must be from the house. She rings the bell six times in a row. But she doesn’t spot any movement inside.

She bounds to the left side. 

There’s nothing suspicious there.

She hastens to the other side.

And there’s smoke coming from a window.

She runs back to the front door and rings the doorbell again, a bit more frantic this time, but no one seems to be home.

She hopes no one is trapped inside as she texts 911… then her manager… giving both the address… and a description of what’s happening… 

Her manager tells her to wait for first responders, which she already plans to do.

She moves her van further down the street to be out of the way and jogs back to the right side of the house.

The smoke is darker and the odor is stronger.

Tobin prays that help will come soon.

She’s about to go to the nearest house to start ringing doorbells when she spies a fire truck in the distance.

She lets out a sigh of relief and and starts waving with both arms high up in the air.

As soon as the truck reaches the house and a fireman jumps from the truck, she approaches them, showing them her deaf card, and motions for them to follow her to the side.

Then she gets out of their way…

A police car soon follows and Tobin knows she needs to give a statement.

Señor Aguirre still hasn’t come home when the police officers let her go to carry on with her job.

She goes home at 9pm that night.

*

To say that Tobin is surprised to see a package for Christen Press the next morning is an understatement.

It’s just a crush, Tobin repeats to herself while she’s standing there, waiting for Christen to answer the door. It’s just a crush. She’s carrying a box the size of her chest that’s so heavy her toned arm muscles are on display.

It’s just a crush, nothing more.

It’s no big deal.

She has a boyfriend.

Who’s to say she even likes girls?

Tobin doesn’t stand a chance. 

She’s just being nice.

Christen opens the door.

She’s so frickin gorgeous. Damnit.

_ Hello, Tobin_, Christen greets her with a shy smile. 

_ Hi_, she mouths back before Christen reaches for the box. But Tobin keeps Christen away then twists her body to check on Christen’s knee and, just as she suspects, Christen is still wearing a brace. 

Tobin shakes her head no. So Christen steps aside to let Tobin in, with a twinkle in her eyes, then closes the door.

A few steps later, she clasps Tobin’s left arm and Tobin’s clammy hands get even clammier. 

Tobin supposes that it’s to lead her in the right direction as they turn left towards the living room. But does Christen have to put her hand so high up on Tobin’s arm that her thumb is almost underneath Tobin’s sleeve?

Thank goodness she lets go as soon as she points to a console table and Tobin sets the box down.

She gets Christen’s signature and then Christen asks, _Hey, do you want water?_

Tobin shouldn’t be taken aback by Christen signing new words anymore but she still is, _No, thank you_.

“Well,” _thank you_, Christen signs back then points at the box, “for carrying that for me.”

_ You’re welcome_, Tobin says before gesturing to the general direction of the front door.

Christen bites her lower lip as if hesitating then nods and turns to walk Tobin to the door.

Tobin can’t help but offer her arm for Christen to hold as they walk. And she does, looking particularly tickled.

Christen glances her way every few steps then turns away when Tobin tries to catch a glimpse of her too.

Finally, Christen asks, _How are you?_

_ So-so_, Tobin answers. _How are you?_

_ So-so_, Christen mirrors. And they both laugh.

“Tobin,” Christen squeezes her arm when they reach the door then signs, _We have a big… 4th of July party… tomorrow… Can you come?_

_ Oh._ Tobin makes a fist and uses it to draw circles in the middle of her chest, _Sorry… no (I can’t)._

“Too bad…”

Tobin gives her a tight-lipped smile when she replies, _Maybe next time._

“I don’t know what that means… but okay.” They laugh again then Tobin waves goodbye.

_ See you next week?_ Christen asks.

Tobin nods.

Whoever said that ‘It is never the situation that cause suffering, it is your thoughts about it,’ is absolutely right as a couple of choice words echo in Tobin’s mind over and over again.

It’s just a crush. She’s just being nice. It will never be more.

*

Nima answers the door again the following Tuesday.

He grins and signs, _Hi, Tobin. Christen will be out soon. _

_ Hello_, Tobin gives him a reluctant smile. _Okay, thank you._

_ She’s still a bit slow_, he adds.

And Tobin just nods. 

She itches to confirm with Nima if Christen already knows the meaning of her sign name but stops herself.

_ How are you today?_ He asks.

_ Good, thank you_, Tobin answers._ How are you?_

_ Highly amused_, he tells her, still grinning. 

Before Tobin can brood over his words, he suddenly turns around, steps aside, and Christen is there, walking towards them, looking even more gorgeous than the week before.

Tobin desperately hopes she doesn’t make any unintentional sounds while staring at Christen in her shorter shorts and tighter tank top with her shiny hair straightened out and her brace gone. But Nima swiftly turns back to her with a laugh so she thinks she might have.

Now Tobin desperately hopes her cheeks aren’t red. 

But it’s Christen’s cheeks that are red. And with a coy smile, she signs, _Hi, Tobin_.

Tobin greets her back, _Hello_, and gets on with the delivery without further ado.

Christen pouts a little but takes the package, writes her signature, and returns the stylus before asking, _How are you today_?

Tobin catches Nima saying, “I asked her that.”

Christen glares at him.

Tobin repeats her answer, _I’m good, thank you. _

“...also… she said earlier,” Nima mumbles.

Tobin asks, _How are you?_

“I’m better,” is all Tobin can understand as Christen goes on and on about something for so long that a crease gradually forms on Tobin’s forehead.

Christen looks at Nima expectantly when she stops talking. And Tobin also turns to him, utterly confused. He rolls his eyes.

_Christen says her knee is getting better_, he explains, still grinning, with both women looking at him intently. _She thinks her rehab is going well_. _She expects it to get more difficult soon, which is a good thing, because it means she is showing a lot of progress. So she is very happy about that. She is also wondering if you are going to ask her out._

_ Wha—?_ Tobin’s eyes widen in shock.

Christen notices and slaps Nima’s arm, “What did you say to her?” 

“What you needed me to,” he smirks.

Christen narrows her eyes at him then softens when she turns her head back, “Tobin…”

Tobin needs for this to be over quickly, _I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I swear, I wasn’t trying to come on to you. And whatever it is that makes you feel like I was, I’ll stop, I promise._

“Nima,” Christen gives him a questioning look but he has the same shocked expression as Tobin.

_ Dude_, he signs to Tobin, _that’s not what that meant—_

But Tobin doesn’t let him finish and, with one last glance at Christen, she bolts out of there.

*

Tobin thanks God for bringing her to Jon Aguirre’s doorstep that afternoon.

After last week’s incident, she receives instruction to reattempt delivery to his house on this day, around this time.

Soon after the doorbell rings, a much older man with graying hair and five o’clock shadow opens the door.

“Tobin!” Jon Aguirre rushes out the door, beaming and crushing her in a hug. It’s just the kind of comfort Tobin needs right now—something akin to a dad’s hug.

They pat each other on the back before Jon cups Tobin’s face in both hands.

“Thank you,” he says so earnestly that Tobin manages to smile again as she nods.

Then she pats his shoulder as he lets her go. He checks his pockets, looking for something, but doesn’t seem to find anything there.

“Come on,” he waves her over. “Come on in.”

Tobin follows as he leads her into his house, past an area with a makeshift wall covered in plastic and into the most magnificent kitchen Tobin has ever seen. 

Jon smiles as she takes it all in before giving him the package (which he places on the large kitchen island) and taking his signature.

He moves to a corner, takes a whiteboard propped against the wall on the counter, and brings it over to the island, along with a marker and an eraser.

Tobin notices a grocery list with lots of herbs, vegetables, and specific meat cuts on the whiteboard before Jon erases all of it.

_ I can’t thank you enough for what you did last week when the fire broke out_, he writes then glances at her. _I have food for you to bring home. I won’t take no for an answer._

Then he stares at her and checks, “Okay?” She nods before he erases everything and writes again.

_ If there’s anything you need, anything at all, you let me know_, he glances again. _Promise me you’ll let me know_. He stops writing and fixes his gaze at her. 

Tobin stares right back then shrugs and holds out her pinky.

He laughs and locks their pinkies together.

And Tobin feels a lot better.

*

Lauren and Tobin gush over the squid and mussels from Jon that night, swearing they’re the best they’ve ever had.

Lauren jokes that maybe Tobin should ask Jon for another meal like that.

*

Tobin feels relieved that another Tuesday comes and goes without a delivery for Channing or Christen Press.

* 

The relief, however, only lasts until Wednesday morning. And Tobin finds herself at the door of the Press household again but neither Christen nor Nima is there to greet her.

“You’re new,” remarks the taller, younger woman with curlier hair and rounder face than Christen’s.

Tobin knows better now so she presents her ID to give her name, then flips it around to let the other woman know that she is deaf, without hesitation.

The other woman doesn’t bat an eyelash and simply says, “Ah.” Then she takes her phone out, stands beside Tobin to show it to her, opens a new message, and types, _Hey, Tobin. I’m Channing_.

Tobin’s face lights up and she instinctively points at Channing as if to say, _That’s you!_

Channing laughs as if she understands, “Yep, that’s me!”

Tobin pulls her phone out from her pocket and lets her app say, “Nice… to… finally… meet… you… Channing,” while she’s smiling from ear to ear.

Channing giggles then types, _You’re cute._

Tobin scratches the back of her neck, looking sheepish after typing a reply. Her app says, “Thanks… you’re… cute… too.”

Channing grins, _You should see my sister_.

Tobin freezes for a split second before trying her best to act nonchalant as she mutes her phone, _I’ve met your sister._

Channing peers over Tobin’s phone then types, _Christen?_

Tobin flinches, _Yes._

_ So amirite?_ Channing asks. _Isn’t she cuter?_

What is up with the people in this house? Tobin wonders. _You are both cute in your own ways_.

Channing takes her time to appraise Tobin with a faint smile on her face, _In case you’re wondering, she’s in rehab right now._

Tobin gives Channing a perfunctory smile and then her order, which Channing clips under her arm.

Tobin is about to give her the stylus when Channing types again, _And she’s single._

Tobin wills her face not to react but it’s too late—Channing sees her eyes widening briefly and smirks in triumph.

Then she grabs the stylus to place her signature and returns it with her eyes boring into Tobin, who tries to avoid her gaze, but can’t.

“You like her, don’t you?”

Tobin tries to be as impassive as she can, even with her heart hammering against her chest. She unmutes her phone, types on her app, and faces Channing again.

“Doesn’t… everyone?”

Channing’s teasing smile turns into a soft one, _Not everyone. Not that it matters. Maybe she’s on the lookout for just one. To like her back._

Tobin turns to Channing with her mouth agape.

Channing giggles again, taps Tobin on the arm twice, and leaves. But not before Tobin catches her saying, “My job here is done,” and looking incredibly pleased with herself.

*

_ Are you gonna do something about it?_ Lauren asks Tobin as they begin their stroll along Hollywood Boulevard on Sunday after breakfast. _You didn’t say anything when I asked earlier—Don’t tell me you don’t plan on doing anything?_

Tobin groans, _What can I do?_

She’s been holding her feelings in until this morning because they’ve both been very busy for the past three days. To make up for it, they’ve decided to dine out today to play catch up and finally check out the Hollywood Walk of Fame, starting with the area along the Dolby Theater. (They’ve both never been and they’re running out of new places to go to, to be honest.)

_ Ask her out! _

_ When exactly? When I deliver or when I’m off work and I just show up at her house because I happen to know where she lives? I’m a creep either way. _

_ So what—are you just gonna wait until you’re sure she likes you and makes the first move? _

_ Is that so bad? _

Lauren rolls her eyes in frustration, _Did it ever occur to you that you both might be waiting for the same thing?_

Tobin stops in her tracks and turns to face Lauren but in a flash, Lauren looks alarmed—pulls her away from the road—and Tobin jolts forward—her body twists—her left arm hits the pavement—then her left temple—and she’s sprawling on her stomach on the sidewalk.

She’s quite shaken but she rolls onto her back and takes stock—her left leg hurts but it’s bearable and her left cheek stings.

She lifts her head to look around. Lauren is hovering above her, talking rapidly on the phone, and there’s someone in a helmet rushing towards them from a parked motorcycle. She sits up slowly… 

The bike rider reaches them, kneels beside Tobin, and turns to Lauren, who says, “She can’t hear you. She’s deaf.”

The stranger acknowledges with a nod, removes the helmet and—it’s Keanu Fucking Reeves.

Tobin can’t contain her glee and it shows on her face even if the area around her left eye is starting to hurt more. She instinctively throws Keanu a Shaka.

He chuckles and salutes her right back then asks, “You feeling okay?”

Tobin nods enthusiastically. Lauren smiles and acts as an interpreter.

“Can you wiggle your toes?”

Tobin gives him two thumbs up and even folds her knees—the right without difficulty, the left with a groan.

_ I’m fine, I’m fine_, she signs when the worry returns to Lauren’s face.

“You’re bleeding,” Lauren tells her.

_ I feel fine_, Tobin insists.

“What the hell happened?” Keanu asks.

“Motorcycle,” Lauren says, “driver lost control, swiped her and the others.” She motions further down the sidewalk with her head.

Keanu turns to Tobin with a smile, “Glad you’re feeling fine,” then turns to Lauren, “Make sure she gets checked for a concussion. I’ll go check on the others.”

Tobin signs frantically—

“What’s she saying?” Keanu asks.

“Uhm,” Lauren hesitates and looks apologetic, “She’s asking for a photo.”

Keanu chuckles again then poses with a Shaka. Tobin automatically does the same. Lauren quickly takes the groupie.

*

Tobin comes home late Tuesday afternoon, after 48 hours of being under observation at the hospital, to a framed blow-up of the photo with Keanu, hanging above the TV.

Her hearty laugh fills the room as soon as she sees it.

And her gasp a few minutes later is just as loud when she receives a text from Dave.

[Dave]  
_ Christen asked about you this morning _

[Tobin]  
_ She did? _

[Dave]  
_ She almost panicked when she heard _  
_ you got hit by a motorcycle _  
_ I told her I haven’t seen you but you told me _  
_ you’re fine and you’ll be back tomorrow once _  
_ cleared by the doc _  
_ Have you been cleared? _

[Tobin]  
_ Yeah I am. I’m home now. _  
_ Thanks a lot! I owe you lots _

[Dave]  
_ Don’t worry about it _  
_ Take care of yourself okay _

[Tobin]  
_ Will do. Let’s catch up soon. _  
_ Thanks again! _

Giving thanks seems to be all that she’s doing for the past few days.

She’s grateful to God for watching over her and letting her walk away from the accident relatively unscathed, with only bruises and scratches and a black eye to show for it.

She’s grateful for Lauren and for Dave. She’s grateful for her job and the benefits it provides, which includes healthcare. She’s grateful for everyone who helps after the accident, especially for Keanu.

And she knows now that, if Keanu can magically appear in her life and help, then, anything is possible.

*

She finds a package for Christen on Friday morning. And her body starts buzzing in anticipation.

She counts down all the stops until she gets to her. And at every stop, she tries hard to think of what to do and what to say while she waits for the doors to open.

She’s waiting at Mrs. O’s doorstep and staring blankly to her left when her door opens.

Tobin smiles instantly and waves hello.

Mrs. O smiles back and starts jotting something down on her notepad, the one she brings to chat with Tobin, _They’re beautiful aren’t they?_

Tobin turns to the left again and realizes that she’s been staring at Mrs. O’s flowers. She nods with a big grin to show her appreciation.

Mrs. O writes again, _Would you like one?_

*

Tobin’s dopey smile gives way to a look of steely determination as she rings the doorbell to the house she really wants to be in since 7am.

She stands there, waiting, with her left hand holding the package, her right hand behind her back, and her chest heaving with every deep breath she takes… 

She starts rocking on the balls of her feet when the door opens.

“Tobin,” Christen breathes out as she closes the gap between them, so close it makes Tobin realize that her eyes are greenish-gray and she will gladly get lost in them.

But Christen’s touch reels her in, her fingertips caressing her temple gently, tenderly, as she studies her face, every mark, every line.

“Does it hurt?” Christen asks.

Not anymore, Tobin wants to say. But she shakes her head slowly to say no, afraid that Christen will let go. And just as slowly, gradually, she moves to tuck the package in her left hand under her arm and she’s free to hold Christen’s hand on her cheek, the gesture making both of them smile, softly, ardently.

Tobin tilts her head towards their hands and Christen sways a little. But then she takes a quick breath and gives Tobin’s left hand a squeeze before bringing their hands down to their sides, fingers intertwined.

“Dave told me,” Christen says.

And Tobin nods.

“I’m so glad you’re okay…” 

Tobin offers the single rose in her right hand, a radiant pink about to bloom, and Christen’s eyes light up. 

She accepts it with her free hand and Tobin watching her intently and meets Tobin’s gaze when she brings it up to her nose to breathe in its scent. Tobin unwittingly breathes along, her dopey smile returning. 

And Christen beams.

She signs, _Thank you_, then gives the rose back, requesting, “Hang on to this for a second?”

And Tobin obliges.

Christen takes her phone from her pocket, taps on it twice with her thumb, then holds it out for Tobin, moving even closer that their cheeks are almost touching.

It’s a heady feeling, their proximity, and Tobin fumbles a few times as she enters her phone number on the keypad.

Christen takes the rose from her hand then hits the call button when she’s done and Tobin’s phone vibrates in her pocket.

She takes it out, clicks on decline, and takes a deep, calming breath before creating a new contact, purposely hiding her screen from Christen, who is smiling but eyeing her suspiciously.

She shows the saved name for Christen a few seconds later, grinning.

_Honeybunch Sugarplum _  
_Pumpy-umpy-umpkin_

Christen narrows her eyes but looks amused. Tobin shakes her head, her expression asking, _No?_

She edits and types again.

Christen brings the rose to her other hand that still hasn’t let go of Tobin’s other hand and pokes Tobin on the stomach.

Tobin tries to dodge, but not really, and the smile on her face grows even bigger, wider. 

She shows her phone again.

_Sweetie Pie Cuppycake _  
_Gumdrop Snugllely-Spigooms_

And Christen snorts, shaking her head.

These dorks just keep grinning stupidly at each other until Tobin leaves. 

Even then, Tobin keeps grinning stupidly on her own...

So this is what it feels like, she thinks, to throw caution in the wind.

*


	2. Text. Her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading Chapter 1. I hope you enjoy reading Chapter 2 as much, if not more. This is the happiest I've ever felt writing a fic.
> 
> Thanks to lucianafromnaples for knowing exactly what to say when I felt like I was stuck.

_ You didn’t ask her out?! _

Tobin can’t really blame Lauren for being incredulous right this moment.

_ After all that flirting, exchanging phone numbers, _ Lauren presses on, _ holding hands almost the entire freaking time, and you still haven’t asked her out on a date? _

_ Yes, yes, I got your point. Pipe down. _

_ You useless gay. _

_ Hey! _

Lauren starts to shake with laughter. 

Tobin hits her with a throw pillow, then tells her, _ Whatever. I have her number. We can get to know each other better. _

_ That’s what a date is for, you idiot. _

Tobin’s phone vibrates and she eagerly takes it out, hoping that it’s—it’s just a text from her service provider. And her face falls instantly. She deletes the message and locks her phone, sensing Lauren’s laughter again.

_ You should’ve seen your face__,_ Lauren teases. But with Tobin’s pout and puppy eyes combo, she decides to take pity. _ Okay, okay, how long has it been since you texted her? _

Tobin’s frown deepens.

_ You seem anxious to get a reply. Has it been that long? _

Tobin winces.

Lauren narrows her eyes. Then her mouth drops open in understanding, _ You. Didn’t. Text her?! _

Tobin’s face contorts in a grimace.

“Oh, for heaven’s sake, Tobin. Text. Her.”

*

Tobin waits until she’s in the comfort of her own room before she opens her messages again. 

Just like her room, her messages only have the bare essentials—texts from her family, Lauren, Dave, her manager, and a few coworkers.

She fluffs her pillows then sits with her right leg folded on her bed, staring intensely at her phone.

She exhales loudly and opens a new message.

It’s 9:16pm, almost 12 hours since she grudgingly let go of Christen’s hand this morning, with Christen pointing out to her that it’s Friday, which means that it’ll be next week again soon, and smiling oh so sweetly at Tobin…

_ Hi_, she types, then deletes almost immediately. 

_ How are you? _ Nope.

_ What’s up? _ Even bigger nope.

_ I hope you had_—_have_—_are having_—? Ugh. Why is this so hard? Tobin feels so lame.

_ Good ni_—No. She should start a conversation, not end it.

Maybe she should just wait and text something cute in the morning. Tobin grumbles.

Or maybe she should just go for it.

There should be a foolproof conversation starter somewhe—oh, she knows!

She pulls up her contact list, goes to the letter C, and spots _ ‘ _ Cutie Patootie Cover Girl’ a few rows down from _ ‘ _Chain Chain Chain,’ which is Lauren’s. (She can’t remember the exact last contact name she assigns to Christen after changing it a few times today; she just knows it starts with C.)

She clicks on the camera icon, then photos, then moments and scrolls through it.

She finds the selfie she wants to send—a photo with her almost-cropped-out smiling face and upper body on the right side, her bent knees at the bottom, and a small, fluffy brown dog on its back, stretched on top of her shoe at the center. She clicks on Choose, types her message, and clicks send.

[Tobin]  
_ Can you believe I had to pay a  
_ _ belly rub toll this afternoon?! _

Tobin smiles in satisfaction. (She even bounces on her bed a little.)

She sees her text get delivered, lies down carefully on her bed (because her bruises still hurt), and places her phone on the nightstand to her right.

And now, she waits.

She turns sideways on her right, placing her left leg on top of a pillow and both her hands beneath her cheek, and peers at her phone on the nightstand like she’s Jedi-Mind-Tricking it to light up.

It doesn’t work.

And minutes pass by without a notification…

She sighs… deciding to get her phone and placing it on her chest instead as she lies on her back again with her right hand under her head.

Just when she’s about to doze off, her phone vibrates. It’s Christen’s reply and Tobin is wide awake again as she reads the preview then opens the message.

[Christen]  
_ Soooooo cute! _

Tobin watches the three dots that appear like a lifeline.

[Christen]  
_ And so is that little doggie ;) _

Tobin’s eyes grow wide but the dots appear again, saving her from coming up with a reply.

[Christen]  
_ Might have to implement a  
_ _ similar toll moving forward  
_ _ :D _

Before Tobin can really think about it, she replies.

[Tobin]  
_ You’d also like a belly rub? _

And then she panics. Because what the heck did she just send?! But Christen quickly replies with a ‘rolling on the floor laughing face.’

[Christen]  
_ We just got this beauty of a   
_ _ pup _

Christen sends her a photo of a cute, little honey-color-coated mutt.

[Tobin]  
_ You’re beautiful _

Fudge!

[Tobin]  
_ She’s beautiful   
_ _ What’s her name?  
_ _ She’s a she right? _

[Christen]  
_ :D  
_ _ Her name is Morena _

[Tobin]  
_ Cool. How did you get her? _

Christen tells her the story of Morena’s adoption and about the self-help article she’s gleaning from to help her train Morena (and herself).

She asks about the other dogs Tobin encounters on the job. And Tobin tells her all about them—the good, the bad, the wonderful—until she runs out of dog tales to tell. And they notice the time.

[Christen]  
_ Do you have to be up early   
_ _ tomorrow? _

[Tobin]  
_ Unfortunately   
_ _ I still have to work tomorrow _

[Christen]  
_ Oh no. I’m sorry for keeping   
_ _ you up _

[Tobin]  
_ Don’t worry about it. I’m happy   
_ _ to finally get to talk with you _

[Christen]  
_ Me too :)  
_ _ What time do you need to wake   
_ _ up? _

[Tobin]  
_ Need to be up before 6 _

[Christen]  
_ Ugh. So early _

[Tobin]  
_ Lol tell me about it _

[Christen]  
_ So is it like a 6-day work week   
_ _ or something? _

[Tobin]  
_ No it’s just 5 days with really   
_ _ long hours like 6am to   
_ _ sometime between 4-7pm  
_ _ They tell me it can end   
_ _ around 9pm on the busiest days   
_ _ like after Black Friday or   
_ _ Christmas _

[Christen]  
_ Oh wow. That seems   
_ _ unforgiving. How are you   
_ _ holding up? _

[Tobin]  
_ Ehh it’s alright _

[Christen]  
_ When are your days off? _

[Tobin]  
_ Sunday-Monday _

The three dots fade in and out for quite a while until—

[Christen]  
_ I’m sorry. I was about to ask  
_ _ more questions but I can’t   
_ _ have you operating on very   
_ _ little sleep tomorrow _

[Tobin]  
_ It’ll be worth it though _

[Christen]  
_ :)  
_ _ You say that now, but you’ll   
_ _ regret it by mid-morning _

[Tobin]  
_ No I won’t _

[Christen]  
_ :D  
_ _ Good night Tobin _

[Tobin]  
_ Okay okay  
_ _ Good night :)  
_ _ Sweet dreams _

Tobin gets another smiley face before giving in and drifting off to sleep—with a smiley face… 

*

Saturday starts off with Tobin sending Christen a screenshot of a tweet early in the morning (before she loads her van) and moves on with their responses sprinkled throughout the day while Tobin is working.

[Tobin]  
**Thoughts of Dog  
** @dog_feelings  
gooooob morning. be sure to start your day with   
a stretchum. maybe even a wiggle. now you’re   
ready for anything. the haters won’t know what  
hit them  
*  
[Christen]  
_ :D   
_ _ Gosh I must’ve spent an hour   
_ _ reading through that Twitter   
_ _ page  
_ _ Totally ruined my schedule   
_ _ But I’m not mad one bit :D  
_ **Thoughts of Dog  
** @dog_feelings  
gooooob morning. i’m going to need a lot of   
attention today. i can just tell  
_ <3  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ Noooooo now what am I gonna   
_ _ send you every morning when   
_ _ you’ve read all the tweets?? _

[Christen]  
_ I’m sure you’ll think of   
_ _ something ;)  
_ _ In the meantime, be sure to   
_ _ send me my gooob morning   
_ _ tweets _

[Tobin]  
_ As you wish ;) _

[Christen]  
_:D  
_*  
[Christen]  
**Thoughts of Dog  
**@dog_feelings  
the commercial on the tv. made a doorbell noise.   
i know deep down it wasn’t my doorbell. but.   
there’s no harm in making sure  
*  
[Tobin]  
_:D  
_**Thoughts of Dog  
**@dog_feelings  
IT IS A BEAUTIFUL DAY. MY CONFIDENCE IS   
SOARING. GIVE ME MY LEASH I’LL WALK   
MYSELF. LOOK AT THESE HIPS SWAY  
*  
[Christen]  
_:D :D :D_ _<3 <3 <3_

*

Tobin can’t help but be glued to her phone when she gets home at 6pm.

She has already changed out of her uniform, planted herself on the couch, and told Christen the highlights of her day when Lauren walks out of her room all dressed up. 

Of course, Tobin doesn’t notice and Lauren has to tap her on the shoulder to get her attention.

_ Just so you know, I’m going out_, Lauren tells her. _ On a date. With a live person. And not my phone _.

Tobin rolls her eyes.

Lauren smirks, _ So I take it that things are going well? _

Tobin doesn’t want to give Lauren the satisfaction of a confirmation but her face betrays her and lights up.

_ Don’t forget to eat_, Lauren teases. 

Tobin just grunts and waves her off.

Lauren hasn’t even crossed the living room to get to the door when Tobin focuses back on texting Christen.

[Tobin]  
_ So what did you do today? _

[Christen]  
_ Aside from obsessing over   
_ _ Thoughts of Dog you mean?   
_ _ :D _

[Tobin]  
_ Yeah that lol _

[Christen]  
_ I had a therapy session for my   
_ _ knee this afternoon _

[Tobin]  
_ How’d that go? _

[Christen]  
_ Pretty well, considering I’m still   
_ _ months away from a full   
_ _ recovery _

Tobin almost asks if it really takes that long but thinks better of it.

[Tobin]  
_ Glad it went pretty well  
_ _ How often do you need to   
_ _ go? _

[Christen]  
_ 3x a week _

[Tobin]  
_ Wow what exactly do you do in   
_ _ those sessions? _

[Christen]  
_ Exercises mostly. Assisted and   
_ _ unassisted. There’s an extension   
_ _ exercise where I need to keep   
_ _ my leg straight then lift it up at   
_ _ an angle  
_ _ Then my therapist helps bend   
_ _ my knee and massage the   
_ _ area around my kneecap _

[Tobin]  
_ Kneecap massage actually   
_ _ sounds cool if the whole thing   
_ _ weren’t so  
_ _ Idk _

[Christen]  
_ Vexing? _

[Tobin]  
_ And unpleasant I presume? _

[Christen]  
_ You can go ahead and ask me   
_ _ what you really want to ask me   
_ _ you know?  
_ _ It’s okay, I won’t mind _

[Tobin]  
_ Okay _

Tobin is curious about the injury and wants to know everything about it and about Christen but—

[Tobin]  
_ Why are you so pretty? _

[Christen]  
_ Hahahahahaha _

—she thinks better of it again. She figures she’ll hear the whole story when Christen feels like telling the whole story. And besides, making Christen laugh is always worth it.

[Christen]  
_ Thank you :) _

Tobin thinks she’s not just thanking her for the compliment.

[Christen]  
_ I got it from my momma ;)  
_ _ :D _

They talk about their moms. And their dads. And both of them having two sisters. And said sisters. With Christen being the middle child and Tobin the youngest girl but not the youngest child because she has a younger brother. 

[Christen]  
_ Speaking of families, mine just   
_ _ called me in for dinner _

[Tobin]  
_ Oh shoot! Thanks for the  
_ _ reminder _

[Christen]  
_ You forgot? Lol _

[Tobin]  
_ Lol I did and Lauren knew I   
_ _ would  
_ _ Enjoy your dinner! _

Good thing there’s still bread and ham and lettuce.

Tobin fixes herself a sandwich, thinking Christen is now too busy to text back.

But once she’s back on the couch and turning the TV on, Tobin receives a reply.

[Christen]  
_ Who’s Lauren? _

[Tobin]  
_ She’s my best friend  
_ _ And my roommate :) _

Christen’s responses start coming in intermittently. 

[Christen]  
_ Oh. That’s nice _

[Tobin]  
_ She’s the one who convinced   
_ _ me to move out here in   
_ _ January   
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ Where are you from? _

[Tobin]  
_ New Jersey  
_ _ Are you from here?  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ Born and raised :) _

They talk about New Jersey and LA. And they learn of each other’s alma maters—a community college near New York that caters to deaf students for Tobin and Stanford for Christen. 

They can’t help but compare the East Coast vs. the West Coast. And get into a heated argument over Shake Shack and In-N-Out, with both of them claiming that theirs is the best burger. Which somehow ends up with talk of their mutual love for beaches and LA.

[Christen]  
_ Aren’t you glad you moved? _

[Tobin]  
_ Ecstatic :) _

[Christen]  
_ :) :) :) _

It’s way past midnight when they say good night.

*

[Tobin]  
**Thoughts of Dog  
** @dog_feelings  
gooooob morning. the first time you wake up.   
could be a mistake. it’s best to fall back to sleep.   
just to be safe  
*  
[Christen]  
_ :D :D :D  
_ **Thoughts of Dog  
** @dog_feelings  
gooooob morning. i’m so glad you’re awake. an   
urgent matter requires your immediate attention.   
it’s me  
*  
[Tobin]  
_ :D :D :D  
_ _ I’m sorry I actually fell back to   
_ _ sleep and had to rush to church   
_ _ Now on to early lunch  
_ _ Are you having a great   
_ _ morning? _

[Christen]  
_ I am. Thanks for asking :)  
_ _ You? _

[Tobin]  
_ I am now :) _

[Christen]  
_ :) _

Tobin looks up from her phone then and into Lauren’s smirking face, _ What? _

_ Asked her out yet? _ Lauren raises an eyebrow.

Tobin lets out an annoyed sigh,_ I really wanted to ask her in person. But fine, let me ask her real quick. _

[Tobin]  
_ You doing anything special   
_ _ today? _

[Christen]  
_ Yes! I’ve been tasked to distract   
_ _ Tyler this afternoon lol  
_ (Tyler is her older sister)  
_ Her boyfriend is going to   
_ _ propose tonight and I need to   
_ _ keep her busy while he   
_ _ prepares _

[Tobin]  
_ Wow! Confident she’ll say   
_ _ yes? _

[Christen]  
_ 100% :) _

[Tobin]  
_ That’s awesome!  
_ _ Congratulations to the happy   
_ _ couple! _

Tobin shows Lauren her phone.

Lauren rolls her eyes, _ You didn’t even try. At this rate, I’m pretty sure she’s gonna beat you to it. _

Tobin crinkles her nose, unamused, and pouts at Lauren before turning her attention to the menu.

[Christen]  
_ Thank you! I’ll pass it along _

Texting with Christen continues all through the day, sometimes with long gaps in between.

[Christen]  
_ You doing anything special   
_ _ today? _

Tobin tells Christen about her and Lauren’s Sunday tourist tradition and Christen asks what her favorites are so far. 

[Tobin]  
_ Last Sunday’s was pretty   
_ _ unforgettable and it’s not   
_ _ because of the accident  
_ _ You won’t believe who showed   
_ _ up to help _

[Christen]  
_ Who? _

Tobin sends the photo with Keanu.

[Christen]  
_ No fucking way! _

[Tobin]  
_ Lol yes way!!! _

After lunch, Lauren drags Tobin to The Americana at Brand and then The Grove to buy new outfits for her upcoming dates (with the guy she went out with last night who’s a senior college basketball player).

Tobin goes along because it’s still a touristy thing to do. And Lauren wants her there because she’s bound to lend her some clothes so it’s best that they both try the pieces Lauren likes—or at least the ones that fit them both.

In short, Tobin has all the time in the retail world to chat with Christen.

[Tobin]  
_ Do you have any Sunday   
_ _ traditions? Or reserved-for-the-  
_ _ weekend stuff? _

[Christen]  
_ Not really  
_ _ I don’t go to church like you do  
_ _ I have no concept of weekends   
_ _ now actually   
_ _ Not like most people anyway _

[Tobin]  
_ Why is that? _

[Christen]  
_ Well the calendar year may be   
_ _ predictable with my job but the   
_ _ weekly schedule can only be   
_ _ described as irregular at best  
_ _ I only know of short and long   
_ _ vacations and rest days _

[Tobin]  
_ What do you do? _

[Christen]  
_ I’m a professional athlete _

[Tobin]  
_ Whoa really?!  
_ _ That’s super cool!!  
_ _ What sport do you play? _

[Christen]  
_ For us, it’s soccer   
_ _ For the rest of the world, it’s   
_ _ football _

Tobin immediately tries to grab Lauren’s attention across the aisle, _ Lauren, Lauren! Christen is a soccer player! _

_ What? Wait a minute, _ Lauren walks over to Tobin, _ what’s her full name? _

_ Christen Press_, Tobin spells out and she can see that Lauren is trying to recall who Christen is.

[Christen]  
_ I know it’s surprising to some  
_ _ I’ve definitely been told I don’t   
_ _ look like a jock _

[Tobin]  
_ That’s bull they’re probably just   
_ _ jealous because you’re the   
_ _ epitome of pretty badass  
_ _ Pretty and badass ;) _

[Christen]  
_ Hahahaha  
_ _ Shut up :D _

_ Stanford Christen Press? _ Lauren asks.

Tobin nods furiously, _ You know her? _

_ I don't ‘know her’ know her_, Lauren tells her, _ but I do know her. She’s like one of the best strikers in the country. _

_ She is? _ Tobin is in awe.

_ She literally won the top college soccer player award a few years ago_, Lauren explains.

_ Wow _… 

_ Yeah, _ Lauren grins, _ I can finally get you to watch the women’s game! Not just that Arsenal crap. _

_ Arsenal isn’t crap! _ Tobin protests.

Lauren laughs, “Oh, my goodness.” _ I can’t believe we’re both dating jocks. _

_ You’re dating a jock_, Tobin points out. _ I’m just— _

_Useless, I know, I’ve told you,_ Lauren keeps laughing.

Tobin pretend-stomps to another section.

[Christen]  
_ What are you up to now? _

[Tobin]  
_ Lauren is shopping _

[Christen]  
_ Wow, a woman after my own   
_ _ heart _

[Tobin]  
_ While I’m just standing outside   
_ _ fitting rooms looking stupid _

[Christen]  
_ Is she really not, like  
_ _ Your girlfriend or anything? _

[Tobin]  
_ What?! Noooooooo  
_ _ That’s like Lannister-level  
_ _ incest _

[Christen]  
_ There isn’t any other level   
_ _ of incest _

[Tobin]  
_ Exactly!  
_ _ Don’t get me wrong  
_ _ She’s wonderful and all and I’ve   
_ _ loved her as my best friend   
_ _ since middle school but eww no   
_ _ Just no  
_ _ We don’t even play for the same   
_ _ team _

[Christen]  
_ Well which team are you on? _

[Tobin]  
_ Team Christen ;) _

[Christen]  
_ You’re unbelievable _

[Tobin]  
_ You’re grinning from ear to ear   
_ _ aren't you? _

[Christen]  
_ And you want to know which   
_ _ team I play for don’t you? _

[Tobin]  
_ Touché :D :D :D _

*

_ You can google her, you know_, Lauren signs while they’re waiting in line at checkout.

_ What? _ Tobin seems taken aback.

_ Christen_, Lauren clarifies, _ you can google her. There are news articles and a Wikipedia page about her. Maybe even YouTube videos. _

_ She’s that famous? _

_ Well, not as famous as Alex Morgan. Not yet anyway. _

_ Who’s Alex Morgan? _

_ Never mind. _

Tobin takes a pause. It’s tempting for sure but, _ I kind of like knowing about her from what she tells me. Plus the internet is full of shitty things. _

_ Truth_, Lauren agrees.

*

[Christen]  
_ Tyler said yes!  
_ _ As if there were any doubts  
_ _ But I like validation lol _

[Tobin]  
_ And gaining a brother :) _

[Christen]  
_ Yes, that too! :)  
_ _ I actually just wanted to say   
_ _ good night  
_ _ I might not have a chance later   
_ _ after I’m done with my sisterly   
_ _ duties like pretending I didn’t   
_ _ know how the proposal went   
_ _ and gushing over her ring _

[Tobin]  
_ Wait. Your sister is home?  
_

[Christen]  
_ She just got home yes _

[Tobin]  
_ Our sisters are weird   
_

[Christen]  
_ What do you mean? _

[Tobin]  
_ When my sister Katie got   
_ _ engaged, she went home   
_ _ afterwards too _

[Christen]  
_ Okay, your point being? _

[Tobin]  
_ It’s an engagement  
_ _ If it were me, I’d keep my   
_ _ fiancée all to myself for like 72   
_ _ hours or something _

[Christen]  
_ You sound so sure about the   
_ _ fiancée part _

[Tobin]  
_ I am  
_ _ It took me a while but I am _

[Christen]  
_ And the 72 hours? _

[Tobin]  
_ Oh, you bet ;) _

[Christen]  
_ Good night Tobin _

[Tobin]  
_ Nooooooo _

[Christen]  
_ Sweet dreams  
_ _ Talk to you tomorrow :) _

*

[Tobin]  
**Thoughts of Dog  
** @dog_feelings  
gooooob morning. it is way too early to be   
conscious. but we must persevere. because i   
have to pee  
*  
[Christen]  
_ :D :D :D  
_ **Thoughts of Dog  
** @dog_feelings  
gooooob morning. i just completed. a series of   
elaborate stretchems. the world isn’t ready for   
me

[Tobin]  
_ Therapy? :) _

[Christen]  
_ Yoga :)  
_ _ But I am going to rehab later _

[Tobin]  
_ You totally just deprived me of   
_ _ making a yoga joke _

[Christen]  
_ I know lol _

[Tobin]  
_ *pouts* _

[Christen]  
_ Stop it _

[Tobin]  
_ *pouts harder* _

[Christen]  
_ You can ask me what team I   
_ _ play for _

[Tobin]  
_ I can? :D _

[Christen]  
_ You won’t like my answer _

[Tobin]  
_ Fine  
_ _ Which team do you play for? _

[Christen]  
_ USA   
_ _ :D :D :D _

[Tobin]  
_ I’d be impressed if I weren’t   
_ _ slightly peeved _

[Christen]  
_ Oh come on that was a good   
_ _ one _

[Tobin]  
_ You did say I won’t like your   
_ _ answer :P _

[Christen]  
_ :P :P :P  
_ _ I also play for a football club   
_ _ called Tyresö _

[Tobin]  
_ So you play for 2 teams ;) _

[Christen]  
_ Of course that’s what you’d   
_ _ focus on _

[Tobin]  
_ Just counting my blessings :D _

[Christen]  
_ You know I’m actually having a   
_ _ hard time reconciling this Tobin   
_ _ I’m texting with to the Tobin I   
_ _ interact with at my door _

[Tobin]  
_ I’m scared to ask but okay  
_ _ How come? _

[Christen]  
_ It’s nothing bad really   
_ _ I just can’t believe the sweet   
_ _ and almost shy person I meet   
_ _ at the door is the same as the   
_ _ cheeky, audacious one I’ve   
_ _ been texting with _

[Tobin]  
_ I get why you’d say that  
_ _ Can I offer an explanation? _

[Christen]  
_ This is gonna be yet another   
_ _ facet of yours I haven’t seen   
_ _ isn’t it? _

[Tobin]  
_ Lol idk maybe, maybe not _

[Christen]  
_ Okay go for it _

[Tobin]  
_ Well there are 2 things that   
_ _ make all the difference really   
_ _ First  
_ _ I can talk freely here   
_ _ With you  
_ _ Unencumbered   
_ _ I won’t have to worry about   
_ _ being misunderstood   
_ _ Or not being understood at all  
_ _ Here I can convince myself   
_ _ that we aren’t so different from   
_ _ each other  
_ _ Talking to you in person, or at   
_ _ least trying to, throws that into   
_ _ stark relief  
_ _ I might as well be speaking a   
_ _ foreign language despite our   
_ _ words being the same _

[Christen]  
_ I’m so sorry _

[Tobin]  
_ No no  
_ _ Please _

[Christen]  
_ I have no excuse for my   
_ _ thoughtlessness _

[Tobin]  
_ I didn’t say that to make you   
_ _ feel bad _

[Christen]  
_ But I do feel bad _

[Tobin]  
_ I’m sorry please don’t  
_ _ You didn't do anything wrong  
_ _ I was just saying it’s one of the   
_ _ reasons why I’m more   
_ _ comfortable here _

[Christen]  
_ Okay  
_ _ Well what’s the second? _

[Tobin]  
_ Reason? _

[Christen]  
_ Yes _

[Tobin]  
_ Have you seen you? _

[Christen]  
_ Damnit Tobin _

[Tobin]  
_ :D :D :D _

*

[Christen]  
_ What are you doing now? _

Tobin fills Christen in on her second job (well, technically her first job) of writing articles for an online health magazine every Monday. It sets off a discussion on health and wellness, which Christen obviously knows a lot about, so Tobin asks if she can pick her brain on assigned topics sometime and Christen says yes.

[Christen]  
_ Have you ever thought of writing   
_ _ on a topic of your choice? _

[Tobin]  
_ No I haven’t   
_ _ And I haven’t asked if I could _

[Christen]  
_ Maybe you should _

[Tobin]  
_ When I can think of something I   
_ _ really want to write about I _ _ guess _

[Christen]  
_ Well what topic interests you   
_ _ the most? _

[Tobin]  
_ You ;) _

[Christen]  
_ You’re incorrigible _

[Tobin]  
_ Lol _

*

[Christen]  
**Thoughts of Dog  
** @dog_feelings  
just finished. my mid afternoon snoozle. my   
schedule is now wide open. until dusk. when i   
will perform. the daily back wiggle

[Tobin]  
_ Pics or it didn’t happen _

To both of their surprise, Christen sends a literal woke-up-like-this selfie—lying down on the couch, wearing a comfy t-shirt, Morena napping on her chest in the foreground, her warm smile and bright eyes directed at the camera.

A dreamy smile creeps on Tobin’s lips as she stares at the photo. And stares at the photo. And stares at the photo. And stares at the photo. And stares at the… 

[Christen]  
_ Busy? _

[Tobin]  
_ Staring _

[Christen]  
_ Can’t say I didn’t like that one  
_ _ :D :D :D _

*

[Tobin]  
_ Is it Tuesday yet?? _

[Christen]  
_ Let’s just skip Mondays from   
_ _ now on? _

[Tobin]  
_ Totally _

*

[Tobin]  
_ Oh oh  
_ _ Did Channing order anything? _

[Christen]  
_ She did _

[Tobin]  
_ Oh thank God _

[Christen]  
_ :D :D :D  
_ _ See you tomorrow :) _

*

[Tobin]  
**Thoughts of Dog  
** @dog_feelings  
gooooob morning. i don’t mean to alarm anyone.   
but i’m feeling great  
*  
[Christen]  
_ :) :) :)  
_ **Thoughts of Dog  
** @dog_feelings  
gooooob morning. i’ve been giving it a lot of   
thought. and i really think. today is your day  
*  
[Tobin]  
_ :) :) :) _

*

Tobin has just rang the doorbell a second time when she decides it’s best to text Christen. She holds her phone with her right hand and Channing’s package with her left, along with another rose from Mrs. O.

[Tobin]  
_ Are you home? _

[Christen]  
_ Yes  
_ _ Sorry  
_ _ Hang on  
_ _ My toll collection system isn’t   
_ _ cooperating _

[Tobin]  
_ I can always just rub your   
_ _ belly ;) _

[Christen]  
_ Do I need to lie down at your   
_ _ feet? :P _

Tobin chuckles when the door opens but—it’s not Christen—it’s a beautiful older woman with porcelain skin and familiar eyes. Could it be—?

Good thing she already has her phone out. 

Tobin smiles as her app says, “Good… morning… M.R.S… Press.” 

“Good morning,” the older woman replies.

Tobin presents her ID then her deaf card and hopes her sudden nerves don’t show.

The older woman gives her a kind smile and Tobin gives her the rose on a whim. The older woman looks surprised, “For me?”

Tobin just nods. And she’s about to hand over the package when the older woman turns around and they both see Christen walking towards them.

_ Hi Tobin,_ Christen signs, beaming.

Tobin signs _ Hi _ back, beaming just as wide and indulging a little bit at the sight of Christen in a t-shirt and short shorts with her hair up in a ponytail.

Christen is close enough for Tobin to read her lips saying, “Mom, this is Tobin.”

“I know dear,” her mom says with a smile. “She introduced herself.”

“Oh, good.” Then Christen notices the rose in her mom’s hand, “Is that my rose?”

“It’s my rose as far as I’m concerned,” her mom smirks.

Christen turns to Tobin, her mouth hanging open in fake-offense, and signs, _ You gave her my rose? _

Tobin shrugs slowly and deliberately, with a sheepish, apologetic look on her face.

Christen shakes her head and giggles before gesturing at her mom and signing, _ My mom S-t-a-c-y _.

Tobin nods then turns to Stacy and signs.

“Tobin says nice to meet you,” Christen tells her mom.

“Can you tell her not to call me Mrs. Press?” Stacy asks.

Christen glances at Tobin, who gives a subtle nod. “You’ve just told her, Mom. She can lip read.”

“Oh, that’s amazing,” Stacy tells Tobin. “Thank you for the flower. I love flowers.”

Tobin smiles and nods.

Then Stacy turns to her daughter and asks, “Are you inviting her for Sunday?”

The Press women exchange a look that Tobin can’t decipher but she sees Stacy smiling softly before Christen turns to her, smiling shyly as she signs.

_ Would you like to come to T-y-l-e-r’s engagement party on Sunday? _

Tobin doesn’t respond right away.

_ You told me… you would, next time_, Christen adds.

And Tobin blushes, _ I did. _

Christen smiles wider.

_ Are you sure? It’s okay? _ Tobin asks.

_ I would love… for you to come. _

_ Then, yes, I would love to come. _

They smile at each other as if Stacy isn’t there, witnessing everything.

*

_ I knew it! _ Lauren smirks in triumph, _ I knew she was gonna ask you first. _

_ It’s not a date! _ Tobin refutes. _ It’s a party. _

_ Who invites a stranger to their sister’s engagement party? _

_ We’re… friends? _

_ Only best friends get invited to these things. Not casual new friends_, Lauren insists. _ You’re her plus-one! _ She grabs Tobin by the shoulders, shaking her excitedly and laughing.

Tobin has an even bigger smile when she goes to sleep that night.

*

[Tobin]  
**Thoughts of Dog  
**@dog_feelings  
gooooob morning. i am going to have. a great   
day. i haven’t figured out how yet. but that’s not   
Important  
*  
_Do you have therapy today?  
__Is it in the morning?  
_*  
[Christen]  
**Thoughts of Dog  
**@dog_feelings  
gooooob morning. i have a feeling. today will be   
a good day. and if it’s not. well that’s alright too.   
because there’s always tomorrow. and there’s  
always peanut butter  
_:)  
__Yes, therapy is in the morning   
__on Wednesdays  
__Were you planning on dropping   
__by?  
_*  
[Tobin]  
_I was  
__I have a delivery for one of your   
__neighbors_

[Christen]  
_ :(  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ It’s okay  
_ _ There’s always next time  
_ _ Hope your therapy goes   
_ _ well :) _

*

They both go to sleep early, thinking Sunday can't come soon enough.

*

[Tobin]  
**Thoughts of Dog  
**@dog_feelings  
i’m sorry i forgot to say gooooob morning. i woke  
up and was immediately distracted by everything  
*  
[Christen]  
_Busy day?  
_**Thoughts of Dog  
**@dog_feelings  
i didn’t do. much of anything today. but that’s   
alright. it’s best to stay consistent  
*  
[Tobin]  
_So package. Not wow. Much   
__sad :’(_

[Christen]  
_ Oh no  
_ _ Hugs for you!  
_ _ Drive safe _

*

[Christen]  
_ Pls let me know when you’re   
_ _ home  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ Just.got.home  
_ _ Have one brain cell left _

[Christen]  
_ So late :(  
_ _ Go eat dinner  
_ _ Then I’ll tell you details for   
_ _ Sunday _

[Tobin]  
_ K  
_ *  
_ Gained two brain cells lol  
_ _ So. Details? _

[Christen]  
_ :)  
_ _ Sunday’s party will be an   
_ _ apéritif dinatoire and start at  
_ _ 6pm  
_ _ It’s a casual, French-style   
_ _ dinner party with lots of finger   
_ _ food and wine and   
_ _ champagne _

[Tobin]  
_ Fancy :)  
_ _ But I don’t have enough brain   
_ _ cells for it right now _

[Christen]  
_ Lol that’s okay  
_ _ I can explain it to you tomorrow   
_ _ when our order comes in ;) _

[Tobin]  
_ Okay good night!! _

[Christen]  
_ Hahahaha _

*

[Tobin]  
**Thoughts of Dog  
** @dog_feelings  
gooooob morning. today is full of possibilities.   
maybe i’ll do things. or maybe i won’t  
*  
[Christen]  
_ Goooob morning  
_ **Thoughts of Dog  
** @dog_feelings  
there are toasty sun beams. coming through the   
windows. and i will soak in them. until i’m   
physically relocated. or i burst into flames  
*  
[Tobin]  
_ :D  
_ _ See you soon!! _

*

Tobin bursts out laughing, absolutely tickled to see Christen standing outside the door with two other women when Tobin pulls up in front of her house.

She takes a better look before she opens the back door of her van and sees Channing to Christen’s right and the other woman, whom Tobin assumes is Tyler, to her left.

Tobin waves at them with a big smile and they all return the wave and the smile, with Christen smiling the widest.

Tobin can feel their eyes on her, watching as she stacks two boxes: a heavy, fragile one, about eight inches tall and two feet wide, and a much lighter one that’s almost as big. Then she lifts them with both hands and pushes the back door closed with her body.

Her big smile hasn’t left her face as she carries the boxes over to where the ladies are standing.

Christen’s big smile hasn’t left her face either, _ Hi Tobin. Can you follow C-h-a-n _?

Tobin nods and smiles at Channing, who leads her to their kitchen, while the two other women trail after them.

Channing taps the granite counter. And Tobin has just placed the boxes down when she feels a hand caressing her left arm.

Her head turns left to right, seeing Christen passing behind her then going to the fridge, with an empty glass in her right hand.

She’s getting ice from the dispenser when she holds out her left hand, which Tobin assumes is for her to hold. And she does, with both of them automatically squeezing each other’s hand, not really knowing what it means. Maybe it simply means ‘Thank you.’ Or maybe it means ‘I’m so happy you’re here.’

Christen hands over the glass after filling it up with water and Tobin signs her thanks before taking it and gulping it down, enjoying the ice-cold water so much that her eyes close.

Christen looks amused when Tobin meets her gaze and places the glass on the counter.

_ Tobin, this is T-y-l-e-r_, Christen gestures at her older sister.

_ Nice to meet you_, Tobin smiles as Christen translates, _ and congratulations on your engagement! _

“Thank you!” Tyler smiles back. “So we’ll see you Sunday?”

Tobin nods, _ Yes, thanks for having me. _ Then she turns to Christen, _ I was promised more details? _

Christen tries to sign the details as best as she can, sometimes needing to spell it out or say it out loud, with both her sisters interjecting, giving Tobin a better idea of Sunday’s set-up.

_ I’m sorry_, she tells Tobin, _ I’m not as good in sign… as I want to be yet. _

_ You did great! Thank you_, Tobin assures her with a warm smile. _ Will you walk me to your door? _

Christen nods then tells her sisters, “Be right back.”

Channing and Tyler both wave goodbye and say, “Thanks, Tobin,” as Christen and Tobin leave the kitchen.

_ I have something for you_, Tobin signs then points outside.

Christen nods and follows Tobin all the way to her van, where Tobin gets three yellow roses near the driver’s seat to give to Christen, who beams.

_ To make up for giving the rose to your mom on Tuesday_, Tobin tells her.

Christen can't help but give Tobin a kiss on the cheek.

And Tobin can’t wipe the smile off her face even if she tries.

*

[Tobin]  
_ What should I wear? _

[Christen]  
_ Something casual _

[Tobin]  
_ My casual is t-shirt and jeans _

[Christen]  
_ Okay maybe not that casual  
_ _ My mom, my sisters and I are   
_ _ all wearing summer dresses _

[Tobin]  
_ Do I need to wear one? _

[Christen]  
_ Not at all  
_ _ It’s not that kind of party  
_ _ Uhm   
_ _ How about garden party   
_ _ dressy casual?  
_ _ Or Sunday best? _

[Tobin]  
_ I can do that _

[Christen]  
_ :) :) :) _

[Tobin]  
_ Sigh  
_ _ Two more sleeps _

[Christen]  
_ Two more sleeps :) _

*

[Tobin]  
_ Shall we skip Saturdays too? _

[Christen]  
_ It’s for the best _

[Tobin]  
_ Lol _

[Christen]  
_ Lol _

*

Saturday flies by as if it also can’t wait to be over.

*

Sunday finally comes. 

And it’s a few minutes after 6pm. 

Tobin feels restless and anxious and excited at the same time, sitting in the passenger seat of Lauren’s car, knowing that they’re moving closer and closer to Christen’s.

She asks Lauren to slow down.

Then she points at the house and Lauren steps on the brakes and turns to Tobin, _ Shut. Up. Christen Press lives here? In this humongous house? _

Tobin urges her to continue driving because she can see another car coming their way. And Lauren quickly finds the nearest available spot to temporarily park her car. And the other car parks next to them.

They just sit there for a minute or two, with Lauren gawking at the house and Tobin sighing.

_ So she’s rich_, Lauren deadpans. 

Tobin nods slowly.

_ And you managed to swing that? _ Lauren jokes.

_ We’re not dating. _

_ Well, date her already so I can meet her! _

Tobin rolls her eyes, _ She told me to text her when I’m here so she can come get me. That’s your chance. _

Just then, the driver of the other car—a lovely, short young woman—passes by Lauren’s side and says hi.

“Are you here for the Press party, too?” The young woman asks.

Lauren answers then gestures at Tobin.

“Oh, I just—I haven’t seen you here before. I’m Fran, by the way.”

Lauren shakes her hand then points at Tobin again—who waves and smiles—and Lauren must’ve asked a question because Fran’s eyes grow wide for a split second. 

Then Fran says, “No, not related. Christen is my best friend.”

Lauren immediately gives Tobin a look that says, _ I told you so _, before turning back to Fran and telling her something.

“There’s no need to text,” Fran says. “I can bring her inside. The front door is usually open for parties.”

Lauren turns to Tobin, _ Did you get that? _

Tobin nods, _ Please tell her thanks_, then quickly grabs two bouquets from the back seat and gets out of the car.

She signs thanks to Fran again before saying goodbye to Lauren, who beams, _ Go get ‘em tiger. _

Tobin shakes her head. 

She and Fran smile at each other from time to time as they walk towards the house.

Fran is wearing a simple blue dress with a light gray cardigan and Tobin is glad she isn’t underdressed.

She’s wearing a crisp, plain white t-shirt tucked into a pair of crisp, tailored black slacks, both of which fit her perfectly, with black Princeton mules, looking the understated beauty that she is, with her long hair down, blow-dried and parted on one side.

They enter the house and before Tobin realizes it, they’ve reached the living room. And suddenly, Tobin comes to a standstill when she sees Christen across the room, turning towards them with her lips parting, gasping as sharply as Tobin does.

She’s downright captivating in her ankle-length, halter neck floral dress, with her hair down in elegant curls. 

Then she smiles and starts walking towards them and Tobin releases a long, deep, audible breath because—damn—her dress has a high slit, which just adds a little bit more oomph to the already sexy toned bare arms and bare shoulders sexiness.

Tobin still can’t move, mesmerized, as she watches Christen hugging Fran and smiling and laughing at whatever it is they’re talking about. And then they turn to her so Tobin gives them a toothy grin.

_ Hi_, Christen mouths.

_ Hello_, Tobin signs.

_ Are those for me? _ Christen asks, pointing at the bouquets, looking hopeful. 

But Tobin shakes her head slowly, with a teasing smile forming on her face, which makes Christen pout, which makes Tobin laugh, which makes Christen jab her waist with a finger.

Their attention quickly gets diverted towards Tyler, who approaches and greets Fran first, then Tobin, who gives her one of the bouquets.

“Thank you, Tobin,” Tyler grins. “They’re beautiful.”

Tobin grins back before turning to Christen, who pouts again.

_ I assume… the other one… is for my mom? _ She signs.

_ You assumed correctly_, Tobin replies with a wink.

Christen rolls her eyes, says something to Fran, then drags Tobin by the wrist from the living room to the back patio, where Stacy is standing in a circle with other older people, including a tall, stocky, handsome black man with graying hair and a short-stubble graying beard.

The man notices them as they’re closing in, fake-gasps with a hand covering his mouth, then places the same hand on his chest and points at the bouquet in Tobin’s hand with the other, saying, “For me?!”

Tobin plays along with a giggle and gives him the bouquet.

“Thank you,” he says, just as Stacy turns to them, sees what he’s doing, and slaps his arm, before taking the bouquet from him.

Tobin giggles some more.

“Thank you for the flowers. This silly man is my husband, Cody,” Stacy tells Tobin, who beams at Cody as he extends his hand for Tobin to shake, which Tobin does straight away.

“Call me Big Daddy,” Cody says.

And Tobin smiles, signing, _ Sure thing, Big Daddy _.

“Mo,” he says all of a sudden, which makes Tobin follow his line of sight, and—oh, he means Christen.

Christen seems to be shaking herself off from a daze, “What?”

“What did she say?”

“Oh. She said, ‘Sure thing, Big Daddy,’” Christen says, glancing at Tobin then rolling her eyes.

Tobin laughs and grins even wider when Cody wraps an arm around Stacy and gives Tobin a thumbs up with pursed lips and then a wink.

Introductions are made around the circle—the would-be in-laws, Christen’s aunts on both sides, Tyler’s godparents—before Stacy asks Christen to put the flowers in a vase and Cody tells them to get drinks pronto.

“Hope you have a great time, Tobin,” he says.

_ I’m sure I will_, Tobin signs, glancing with a soft smile at Christen, who translates again for her. _ I already am. Thank you for having me. _

*

Tobin hasn’t seen a home bar this huge or stocked this full, with such a variety of drinks it can put an actual bar to shame.

_ Do you want anything? _ Christen asks.

Tobin stops herself from making a quip and keeps her expression in check, trying to look as innocent as possible as she meets Christen’s gaze. But she can’t fully restrain her smirk.

Christen seems to catch on and has to bite her lower lip to stop herself from smiling before she shakes her head, takes a deep breath, and signs as calmly as she can, _ Okay then… let’s start with… something sweet. _

They both can’t contain their smiles two seconds later.

*

_ I’ll try anything_, Tobin tells Christen _ . _ And it’s as if Tobin utters the magic words with the way Christen reacts.

Christen is so over the moon that they’re now sharing three plates on a high bar table, filled with foie gras on toast (a must-try for Tobin, 10/10 highly recommend), charcuterie and cheese, tapenade on toast, and truffle fries (Christen’s favorite), among others. 

They each have a full glass of Monbazillac, which, Tobin finds out, is really sweet (Christen wasn’t kidding), and Christen swears goes well with foie gras (it does).

Fran joins them soon after. And Christen and Tobin find the rhythm of translating for each other. With Christen practicing sign, Tobin still lip reading most of time and Christen spelling out words Tobin doesn’t catch when either she or Fran is speaking. And with Christen translating for Tobin and Tobin spelling out words for Christen when it’s Tobin’s turn.

Tobin learns that Fran has just taken the bar exam and has been best friends with Christen since high school, which of course leads to the embarrassing stories Tobin wants to hear, including one at prom where Nima is Christen’s date.

_ “He’s my high school boyfriend,__”_ Christen says.

_ He is? _

_ “I knew you wanted to ask.” _

_ I’m surprised he isn’t here_, Tobin confesses.

“_He works in Singapore. And was just on vacation here for a month.”_

_ Why did you break up? _

Christen gives a naughty smile, _ “I discovered college girls.” _

_ Really?! _ Tobin laughs.

_ “Playing for two teams, remember?” _ Christen smirks.

Tobin laughs harder, _ Anyone serious? _

_ “Not until recently.” _The twinkle in Christen’s eyes seems to say, ‘come on, ask me.’

_ Teammate? _

_ “Teammates. Plural. Before Tyresö, I played for another club.” _

_ How long? _

_ “Not that long. A year with both.” _

_ And no one in college? _

_ “Just one girl. But not serious at all.” _

_ Wow_, Tobin mouths before turning to Fran. _ Does she have a type? _

_ “I won’t let her answer that,” _ Christen says.

_ Oh, come on! _ Tobin exclaims.

“What is she asking, Chris?” Fran asks.

“Nothing.”

Tobin brings her phone out and types then shows it to Fran, _ Does she have a type? _

Fran laughs, “You could say that.”

“Franny!”

Tobin laughs and texts again, _ She likes athletes? _

“Maybe,” Fran says, smirking. “Maybe not.”

Tobin presses on, _ Athletic girls? _

Fran doesn’t answer but keeps her smirk.

Tobin smirks back, _ So do you think I’m athletic enough? _

Fran laughs again and Christen can’t help but snatch Tobin’s phone from her hands to read what she typed. 

Christen bites her lower lip again to stop herself from smiling too much and shakes her head.

She cancels the New Message and is about to return Tobin’s phone when something catches her eye in Messages. She glances at Tobin and quirks an eyebrow.

Tobin smirks and nods once as if challenging her to proceed.

Christen does and opens what she remembers is her last message to Tobin and sees her new contact name in full.

_ Cutie Pie Pottymouth   
_ _ California Dream Girl _

“I am not a pottymouth!”

Tobin laughs, _ Of course that’s what you’d focus on._

Christen reads the contact name again and takes her time staring at it.

Channing joins them just then and asks, “What’s happening?”

“I don’t know,” Fran says. “They’re being weird.”

“What were you talking about?”

“Chris’ exes.”

“Ooh, have you talked about Tobin’s?”

This gets Christen’s attention. She looks up from Tobin’s phone, smirking.

Tobin rolls her eyes, _ What do you want to know? _

_ “Everything,” _ Christen says, before returning the phone.

Tobin tells them that she tried dating guys before she realized that they’re just fun to hang out with, at least the good ones anyway. That she fell for a girl in college who didn’t like her back. That she has dated a number of women until she got into her recent and only serious relationship of two years.

_ “Why did you break up?” _ Christen asks.

_ She moved to the Midwest. _

Christen knits her brows, _ “You don't like long distance?” _

_ I was willing to make it work_, Tobin tells her. _ But she wasn’t. _

Fran asks if Tobin’s ex is deaf, too, and Tobin signs yes. Then Channing asks if Tobin has ever dated a hearing person before.

Tobin shakes her head no. Then she turns to Christen and smiles, _ But, like I said, I’ll try anything. _

Christen keeps that to herself.

*

The conversation turns serious somehow. Likely to do with Fran’s curiosity about things Tobin finds hard to do, which leads to talk about hardships deaf people experience in general.

Tobin tells them about slightly older friends who have master’s degrees but are still unemployed. About how most of them have tried working menial jobs because those are the only ones available for them. About the success story of one deaf journalist in Chicago.

Christen asks if that’s the goal.

_ I mean, it would be nice_, Tobin answers. _ It’s why I haven’t given up on my writing. But right now, I just really want a stable, full-time job. It brought me here. And I’m so grateful. _

*

The thing that gets to her when sharing a lot about herself this evening, Tobin realizes, is having to stare at Christen’s lips.

She can’t help it when she signs. She tells herself at first that it’s necessary, lip reading as Christen translates, to watch out for words she might have difficulty with, which happens quite often. But the more often she does it, the stronger she feels drawn to Christen’s lips.

It doesn’t help that the longer Tobin stares, the more flustered Christen seems to get, and the more frequently Christen wets her lips.

It also doesn’t help that more people have been joining in and out of their conversation to ask Tobin more questions.

There’s Cody, who checks if she’s having a good time then asks about her parents.

She tells him that she’s having a great time. And that she’s enjoying her second glass of wine (a Willamette Valley Riesling from Portland) more than the first. That her dad setup his own underwriting services company. That her mom works in pharma—something to do with biotechnology that she doesn’t understand.

She learns that Cody is a big shot banker and Stacy is a stay-at-home mom. That if her dad ever comes to LA, Cody hopes to invite him for a round of golf. 

He takes his leave after kissing the top of Christen’s head.

Then there’s Stacy, who checks if she has eaten enough and encourages her to get more food before asking if she plays sports.

She tells her that the food is delicious and she will definitely get more. That her family plays tennis and her older sister was even a collegiate tennis player. And that she has tried almost all other sports at least once.

Stacy is overjoyed because tennis is her sport and asks Tobin to play with her sometime before giving Christen a kiss on the cheek and leaving their table.

Then there’s Lily, Christen’s aunt, whom Christen takes after and refers to as her twin, who asks about Tobin’s family, which leads to Tobin sharing photos of her 10-month-old nephew and all of them cooing at his cuteness.

_ “Do you like kids?” _

_I love kids._ _Do you want to, maybe, have kids someday?_

_ “I do.” _

*

They seem to be acutely aware of what the other one is thinking when they’re finally alone again.

_ I know we’re… already outdoors, _ Christen starts, _ but do you want to get… some air? Get away from… people for a while? _

Tobin nods then places her palm flat against her chest and draws circles with it, _ Please._

_ Okay, we still have… a couple of minutes… of twilight left… Want to take a… stroll? _

Tobin nods again.

Christen lends her a pair of flip flops and brings her to the empty cliffside lot across the street behind their house, where they walk further down a trail to a big slab of rock that they can sit on.

Christen takes a seat first, adjusting her dress and leaving space to her right, and Tobin follows, leaving an inch between them.

_ This is… Lunada Bay_, Christen tells her.

And Tobin nods before they look out over the ocean and take in the view.

There isn’t a trace of orange left in the sky, the majority a dusty blue, with strips of white near the horizon and the ocean a similar hue to Christen’s eyes.

Christen’s eyes… 

Still strikingly beautiful in the low light, Tobin thinks, as she goes through the features of Christen’s face one by one—her nose, her cheekbones, and, oh, her lips… 

Christen turns to her leisurely, _ Beautiful, isn’t it? _

Tobin nods just as slowly, staring dreamily at Christen’s face.

The corners of Christen’s lips start turning up into a soft smile, _ I meant the view._

Tobin smiles just as softly, _ So did I._

Christen’s smile blooms into a giggle and she starts poking Tobin in the ribs. But Tobin quickly grabs her hand. And without much thought, their palms open and their fingers interlace, each hand grasping the other tightly.

And Tobin’s eyes close, an indescribable feeling, a current, coursing through her body.

Her breathing is deep and heavy when she opens her eyes and sees their clasped hands on top of her thigh.

She turns to Christen, whose eyes are still closed, and gingerly brings their hands up, placing the back of Christen’s hand over her heart.

Christen opens her eyes. Tobin leans a little, lingering close, seemingly suspended, requesting permission. 

And Christen’s gaze fall to her lips.

Tobin moves closer… ever so slowly… taking a pause a breath away from Christen’s lips… their breaths mingling, waiting, bated… until Christen closes the gap between them, lips parting… And they kiss… softly, tenderly… breathing each other in… 

Then several things happen at once: their hands let go, their heads tilt, their mouths open, and their kiss deepens… with Tobin’s arms wrapping around Christen’s waist and Christen’s hands cupping Tobin’s face… with tongues curling and sweeping and stroking the other… It’s intoxicating, this kiss… breathtaking, fervent, and wet.

They reluctantly break apart, eyes searching each other’s faces, chests heaving, lips smiling in disbelief. And then they kiss again. And again. And again. Until Christen ends up on Tobin’s lap. And they suddenly remember where they are. And they bust out laughing.

They hold each other close as their laughter dies into giggles… 

Tobin can’t help but plant a kiss on Christen’s shoulder and Christen can’t help but kiss the side of Tobin’s jaw before they turn to each other again, the look of unbridled joy evident on their faces.

_ Will you go on a date with me? _

_ “I thought you’d never ask.” _

  
  



	3. What's a hard chill?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to lucianafromnaples for reacting accordingly most times and unexpectedly at times.
> 
> And thanks to you, dear reader, for being here. Your kudos and comments give me life. Happy holidays :)

Tobin can’t believe her luck.

_ So that’s a yes, right? _

Christen giggles before giving her a peck or two. (Well, three, actually.) And they’re kissing again… with barely contained smiles and audible breaths… that end in sighs and lips grudgingly moving apart… 

There’s a soft smile on Christen’s face when she locks eyes with Tobin again. And her nod is just as soft. 

_ Yes. _

Tobin’s smile grows as she breathes in deeply with her shoulders rising… and breathes out with her head tilting slowly to one side in contentment.

For a split second, Christen looks like she’s about to kiss her again. But she doesn’t.

_ “We should… go back… It’s getting dark.” _

Tobin’s smile doesn’t leave her face when she nods… when Christen gets to her feet… when Tobin does the same and offers a hand for Christen to hold… 

And they carefully make their way back to Christen’s house, hand in hand, with Tobin lighting up their path with her phone.

*

Christen only lets her hand go when she makes a beeline towards the makeshift bar, where someone is filling up several tall, slender glasses on a tray with something bubbly. 

She grabs two glasses, hands one to Tobin with a smile, then spells out, _ Champagne. _

_ Are we making a toast? _

They both try their best to sign with a champagne flute in one hand.

_ “Of course! That’s what a good… champagne is for.” _

They both giggle before Tobin signs, _ You go first. _

Christen beams, _ “Okay, to Lauren… for convincing you… to move to LA.” _

Tobin grins, _ To Channing, for shopping online almost every week. _

They giggle again. 

_ “To you,” _ Christen pauses, then smirks, _ “for wearing that silly… party hat.” _

And Tobin smiles the kind of smile she hopes is alluring enough for Christen, _ To you… for asking my name. _

*

_ Oh, my goodness! _ Lauren exclaims. _ She’s amazing!_

Lauren has shaken Tobin awake at an ungodly hour for a Monday, demanding to know all the details from the party before she goes to work. Tobin can’t really complain.

_ She is, _ she replies to Lauren with a dreamy smile before closing her eyes and letting her head fall back into her pillow. _ She really, really is._

Lauren shakes her again, still perched on the side of her bed.

Tobin opens one eye.

_ You can go back to dreaming about her once you’ve told me everything__,_ Lauren tells her. _ We haven’t even reached the end of the party! _

_ She gave me a kiss on the cheek when my Uber arrived. The end. _ Tobin turns sideways, away from Lauren, and hugs one of her pillows.

Lauren slaps her butt once… twice… and Tobin is sure that Lauren is grumbling about the abbreviated story. But Tobin resolutely keeps her eyes closed until she feels Lauren’s weight off her bed. And even then, she doesn’t risk it.

She hugs her pillow tighter and thinks back to the party last night and—of course—Christen… who held her hand and stood or sat wonderfully close to her the rest of the evening… Christen… whose eyes were driving her crazy by, one, being nothing short of staggering and, two, constantly gazing at her lips… Christen… whom she can text right now—dang it, Tobin, don’t waste another minute.

[Tobin]  
_Gooob morning :)  
_**Thoughts of Dog  
**@dog_feelings  
nobody ever told me. when you wake up from   
a nap. you can immediately start another one.   
that was something i figured out. all by myself

[Christen]  
_Gooooob morning :)  
_**Thoughts of Dog  
**@dog_feelings  
some things in life. just aren’t fair. for example.   
i keep having to scoot over. to stay in the path   
of this sunbeam. shining through the window  
_ :D _

[Tobin]  
_ :D _

[Christen]  
_ Need to meditate then do yoga   
_ _ brb :-* _

[Tobin]  
_ Okayyy ( *3* )  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ Okay I’m back :)  
_ *  
_ Tobin?  
_ *  
_ You fell back to sleep again   
_ _ didn’t you?  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ I was seriously contemplating the   
_ _ merits of writing an article on the   
_ _ misconceptions about yoga _

[Christen]  
_ For almost two hours?  
_ _ Really? _

[Tobin]  
_ First  
_ _ Does it really make you flexible? _

[Christen]  
_ *eyeroll* _

[Tobin]  
_ :D :D :D _

[Christen]  
_ You know, that’s interesting enough   
_ _ But you know what could be better? _

[Tobin]  
_ What? _

[Christen]  
_ Best yoga poses for sex _

Tobin holds her breath.

[Christen]  
_ I know at least two positions you   
_ _ might like ;)  
_ _ Okay I’ll shower now ttyl :) _

Tobin stays rooted to her spot in bed, trying her best to fight the impulse to google yoga poses + sex.  
*  
[Christen]  
_ Have you had breakfast? _

[Tobin]  
_ Not yet _

[Christen]  
_ Don’t tell me you’re still in bed _

Tobin takes a selfie that she immediately sends to Christen.

She’s really still in bed, with her head on a purple pillow, her hair splayed across one side, her brown eyes seemingly jumping out of the photo, her plump pink lips pouting, and her tank top showing just enough shoulder muscle and cleavage.

Christen doesn’t reply for several minutes.

[Tobin]  
_ Still there? _

[Christen]  
_ Wanna come over?  
_ _ After my therapy I mean  
_ _ To write your article and hang out   
_ _ and stuff _

[Tobin]  
_ If by stuff you mean make out then   
_ _ yes pleeeease. Sign me up! :D _

[Christen]  
_ Only if you finish your article :P _

[Tobin]  
_ You’re no fun _

[Christen]  
_ Get a move on Tobin _

[Tobin]  
_ So bossy _

[Christen]  
_ You like it  
_ _ Don’t even try to deny it _

[Tobin]  
_ Wouldn’t dream of it ;) _

*

Tobin shows up at Christen’s around mid afternoon with a backpack, wearing eyeglasses, an orange slouchy beanie, a white Nike t-shirt, light gray shorts with the word Geek across it, and black slides. (Christen tells her there’s no need to dress up, they’re just hanging out. So here she is. Totally casual. And totally adorable.)

She grins when Christen opens the door, slack-jawed and wide-eyed at how she looks. 

In lieu of a greeting, she proudly signs, _ I finished my article! _

“Oh, thank God,” Christen breathes out before throwing her arms around Tobin’s neck. “I really want to kiss you right now.”

Tobin puckers her lips and they both giggle into a kiss… that’s long… and slow… and sweet… 

“So you need glasses,” Christen says matter-of-factly, still hanging on to Tobin.

Tobin shrugs, her hands resting on Christen’s waist, her expression saying something like, ‘it is what it is.’

“Do you wear contacts most days?”

Tobin nods.

“Can you wear your glasses more often?”

_ If it gets you to kiss me like that, then most definitely,_ Tobin smirks.

Christen rolls her eyes but is smiling when she starts signing again, _ If you finished… your article, then what’s with… the backpack? _

_ Brought my laptop__,_ Tobin answers, _ in case you’re willing to help me with that yoga article._ She wiggles her brows. 

Christen smacks her arm promptly.

_ I meant misconceptions! Not sex poses! _

Christen narrows her eyes before turning around and walking inside.

Tobin laughs as she takes in the view—of Christen in a t-shirt, which is thankfully short, and a pair of God’s-gift-to-Tobin yoga pants because—dang, what a peach. How hasn’t she noticed before?!

But then Christen suddenly looks back. And Tobin tries to smile as innocently as possible before hurrying after her.

*

They do end up creating an outline for an article on the misconceptions about yoga. 

(But only after they’re forced to stop making out because Tobin’s thighs have gone numb and tingly from Christen sitting on her lap.)

Christen convinces Tobin to start writing her article while she reads one of her newly purchased books, ‘We Should All Be Feminists’ by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie (an author Tobin also admires, thanks to her former lit professor).

Tobin sits on one end of the couch, with her laptop on her lap and her legs stretched on an ottoman, while Christen lies on the couch, with her head on a pillow next to Tobin.

Every so often, they stop what they’re doing and give each other kisses.

They only stop what they’re doing entirely when Christen’s alarm goes off and she asks if Tobin wants to watch the sunset by the cliff. Tobin, of course, says yes. So Christen gets sweatshirts for both of them to wear—a pink zip-up hoodie for herself and an old school style black pullover for Tobin that says ‘Let Your Soul Guide Your Way,’ which fits Tobin just right—before heading to “their” slab of rock.

They don’t really watch the sunset when they get there.

*

Christen offers to drive Tobin home but Tobin insists on taking an Uber instead. So Christen waits with her at the door and tells her that she can keep the pullover for now and return it whenever.

A minute before the Uber arrives, Christen smiles that sweet smile Tobin has come to know so well and signs, _ Thanks for hanging out with me today. _

Tobin smiles back, _ Thanks for inviting me. _

_ See you tomorrow, Tobin. _

Tobin grins, _ Channing ordered again. _

Christen nods, _ She did,_ then beams and gives Tobin another kiss.

_ See you tomorrow, Christen. _

*

After sending their usual gooob morning messages, Christen excitedly texts.

[Christen]  
_ It’s Tobin Tuesday!!! :) _

And Tobin laughs. 

She definitely likes the sound of that.  
*  
She arrives at Christen’s, beaming and bearing another rose. And Christen surprises her by giving her a bottle of Gatorade after greeting her with a kiss.

_ How long… can you stay? _ Christen asks.

_ A few minutes. _

They spend the next few minutes giggling between kisses before Christen asks, _ When are you… taking me out… on a date? _

_ Can you free up this Sunday and next Sunday? _ Tobin asks. _ I don’t have a confirmed reservation yet. Do you like coffee? _

_ I love coffee. _

_ Okay, I’m thinking after-lunch coffee, then an activity in the afternoon, and then dinner? _

_ Sounds good… but what kind of… activity? _

_ That’s top secret,_ Tobin grins.

*

_ Lauren, I don’t know where to take her! _ Tobin whines later that night.

_ Why don’t you go somewhere and do something you like? _ Lauren suggests.

_ I want to take her somewhere she would like. _

_ Are you worried because she’s rich? _

_ No. _

Lauren levels her with a stare.

_ Okay, maybe. _

_ She doesn’t like you because you’re rich. _

_ I am not rich! _

_ Exactly. And if she’s the kind of girl you can only take to five-star restaurants and not Leo’s Tacos Truck, then she’s not worth it. _

Tobin continues to frown.

_ But she’s not that kind of girl, is she? _ Lauren posits. _ I mean, she clearly loves her champagne and I bet she loves her designer clothes, too, but everything you’ve told me so far suggests she isn’t some snooty, rich girl. _

Tobin nods earnestly.

_ So then, what’s the worry? _

Lauren has a point. But Tobin still doesn’t rest easy that night.

*

The next day, Christen texts Tobin again around lunchtime after they send their gooob morning messages.

[Christen]  
**Thoughts of Dog  
** @dog_feelings  
if your day didn’t go well. that’s perfectly fine.   
because now you get to dream. and who   
knows what could happen. i hope i dream i’m   
a penguin. so i can zoom on my belly  
*  
[Tobin]  
_ Done with therapy today? _

[Christen]  
_ You could say that lol  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ How’d it go? _

[Christen]  
_ Not well I’m afraid  
_ _ Minor setback  
_ _ :(  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ I’m sorry  
_ _ Wanna talk about it? I may not   
_ _ reply straight away but will read   
_ _ it as soon as I can  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ It happened in a championship   
_ _ final   
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ Your injury? _

[Christen]  
_ Yes  
_ _ I just scored a brace to tie the   
_ _ match at 3-3 when I got a hard   
_ _ tackle and lifted off the ground   
_ _ a bit   
_ _ When I landed, I felt my knee   
_ _ pop  
_ _ They carried me off the field   
_ _ on a stretcher with 8 minutes   
_ _ left in regulation time  
_ _ We lost 4-3  
_ _ *  
_ _ The first time we met was a few   
_ _ days after my ACL reconstruction   
_ _ surgery  
_ _ Full recovery takes at least 6   
_ _ months  
_ _ They told me today it might take   
_ _ longer than that for me  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ I’m so sorry  
_ _ Please remember this  
_ **Thoughts of Dog  
** @dog_feelings  
it is better to zoom. and tear something.   
than to never zoom at all

[Christen]  
_ *hugs*  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ I wish I could give you real hugs   
_ _ right now _

[Christen]  
_ Then you owe me real hugs the   
_ _ next time you see me _

*

Tobin texts her again after 7pm.

[Tobin]  
_ Delivery for Christen Press :) _

[Christen]  
_ ? _

[Tobin]  
_ I’m at your door _

Tobin doesn’t know how Christen manages to reach the door so quickly but she does. And she opens it with a look of wonder on her face.

“You’re here.”

Tobin is all smiles, still in her uniform with a Fragile sticker on her chest, her delivery van parked out front.

_ You ordered hugs. I do same-day delivery._

Tobin gets a glimpse of a priceless smile on Christen’s face before Christen crashes into her, holding her tight.

Tobin holds her just as tight, placing her palms flat against Christen’s back, moving them up and down, and up and down in gentle strokes as if to say, ‘I’m here… I’m here…’

And they start to sway from side to side as if they’re slow dancing to a song that only they can hear… 

For a moment there, Tobin loosens her grip, thinking Christen is about to let go, but Christen simply adjusts herself in Tobin’s arms and goes right back into their soothing embrace, with the side of her head leaning against Tobin’s, her right arm wrapped around Tobin’s neck, and her other arm resting on Tobin’s shoulder.

Tobin starts making noises in her throat, sounding like a petulant child trying to singsong a long, comical story but complaining along the way. And it makes Christen throw her head back in laughter. And Tobin can’t help but giggle along as she carries on with the gag.

And when their laughter and giggles fade into smiles, they gaze into each other’s twinkling eyes before giving in to each other’s lips in a warm and affectionate kiss… 

_ “Thank you.” _

_ Anytime. _

*

Tobin sends Christen a picture of the sunrise on her way to work the next morning, with a few simple words.

[Tobin]  
_ The sun also rises  
_ _ (*3*)  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ So true. Thank you  
_ _ Be safe :-*  
_ _ *  
_ _ That pic is beautiful btw  
_ *  
All the time Tobin spends waiting and walking this morning, she also spends contemplating. 

Despite Wednesday ending on a happy note, she can’t help but think about Christen’s wellbeing and recovery, about how she can help, if she can help, and where the heck will she take her on a date? It’s already Thursday! What should she do? It should be something therapeu—oh. Why didn’t she think of it right away?

A hand waving in front of her face breaks her reverie.

Tobin waves back with an uneasy smile before Jon Aguirre fishes his phone out of his pocket and stands next to her to show her what he’s typing.

_ You okay, Tobin? _ He asks.

Tobin hesitates then shakes her head with a grimace.

_ What’s wrong? _

Tobin brings out her phone and types, _ I asked a girl out on a date._

_ Did she say yes? _

Tobin can’t help but smile for real before nodding.

It makes Jon smile, too, _ So what’s the problem? _

_ I don’t know where to bring her for dinner. She’s… classy, like you. _

Jon smiles more broadly this time, _ I know just the thing. Will you let me help? You did promise me, remember? _

Tobin sighs.

_ Pls trust me on this. Did you like the food I asked you to bring home? _

Tobin nods enthusiastically, _ That was awesome! Thanks again. _

_ Well, how about I make a reservation for you at the restaurant? _

Tobin lights up, _ Where they serve those? _

Jon nods with a smile that says he knows he’s won her over, _ When is this date? _

_ I was hoping this Sunday, on my day off__,_ Tobin tells him. _ If not, then next Sunday. _

_ Early dinner fine by you, maybe at 6:30pm? _

Tobin nods again and breaks into a grin because of Jon’s grin, which is comforting and exciting at the same time.

They save each other’s number and Jon promises to text Tobin later that night to confirm.

*

[Tobin]  
_ All set for Sunday :)  
_ _ I’ll pick you up at 1pm for coffee  
_ _ Then we have a reservation at  
_ _ 3pm and can’t be late  
_ _ Dinner is at 6:30pm  
_ _ Please wear something   
_ _ comfortable _

[Christen]  
_ :) :) :) <3 <3 <3  
_ _ My slightly obsessive-  
_ _ compulsive self is so happy and   
_ _ grateful that you broke that down   
_ _ by time period   
_ _ I just might be turned on lol _

[Tobin]  
_ :D :D :D  
_ _ So what else can do that? _

[Christen]  
_ Oh look at the time  
_ _ You need to sleep :P _

[Tobin]  
_ Noooooo _

[Christen]  
_ Good night Tobin _

[Tobin]  
_ Hmph _

[Christen]  
_ Sweet dreams :-* _

[Tobin]  
_ Okay okay  
_ _ Goodnight sweet dreams  
_ _ (*3*)  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ Wait  
_ _ You said you’ll pick me up  
_ _ Are we taking Uber? _

[Tobin]  
_ No, I borrowed Lauren’s car _

[Christen]  
_ Oh no I don’t want to   
_ _ inconvenience Lauren _

[Tobin]  
_ It’s cool  
_ _ She’s totally cool with it _

[Christen]  
_ Can we take my car instead?  
_ _ Please  
_ _ I insist _

Tobin doesn’t know what to think of this—

[Christen]  
_ You can drive to where we’re   
_ _ going so it’ll still be a surprise  
_ _ :) _

—but just like that, she smiles again.

[Tobin]  
_ Thank you :)  
_ _ Okay let’s do that if that’s what   
_ _ you want _

[Christen]  
_ It is :)  
_ _ Thank you :-* _

*

Sunday comes soon enough, with Tobin just having enough time to send Christen sunrise photos with inspirational quotes and greet her good morning, then ask how her day went and say good night the past two days.

This morning, she prays so solemnly at church for Christen’s recovery and their date that Lauren abstains from teasing her all through lunch.

Then at 12:51pm, she rings the doorbell to Christen’s house, wearing a loose, plain white t-shirt and tight-fitting black jeans, with gray Chelsea boots and her hair down, holding a black long vest Lauren insists she brings and wears for dinner.

To her surprise, it’s Stacy who opens the door. “Hello, Tobin.”

Tobin quickly gets her phone out to greet her, _ Good afternoon, Stacy._

“Come in,” Stacy says. “Christen will be down soon.”

Tobin closes the door and follows Stacy to the kitchen where she offers her a seat by the counter.

“I have to say I’m curious, Tobin… Where are you taking her for dinner?” Stacy asks. Then she somehow senses Tobin’s hesitation and adds, “Don’t worry, I won’t tell her.”

Tobin gives her a grateful smile, mutes the phone, and shows it to her as she types, _ I scored a table at The Basque. _

Stacy looks stunned.

_ Will that work? _ Tobin asks, suddenly worried.

“That’s… fantastic, actually. I heard it’s hard to get a table there.”

_ Oh. My friend made the reservation for me._

“Then you’re very lucky. I’m sure Christen will love it.”

Tobin smiles in relief. Then she smiles even brighter when Christen appears in the kitchen, in a fitted white t-shirt tucked into a black, knee-length, A-line skirt, with black boots, an oversized, short-sleeved, gray utility jacket, and wavy hair, smiling just as bright.

_ That’s comfortable? _ Tobin asks.

_ What? I wanted to look nice,_ Christen tells her.

_ You always look nice. _

Christen rolls her eyes and smiles before giving her mom a peck on the cheek and saying goodbye, then guiding Tobin outside their garage, to their driveway where a BMW is parked.

Christen gives her the car key and walks over to the passenger side but Tobin beats her to it—quickly unlocking the car then rushing to the passenger door to open it for her—and Christen seems quite elated by the gesture.

_ Hi,_ Tobin signs, with a muted smile on her face, once she’s settled in the driver’s seat.

_ Hi,_ Christen smiles back.

_ All set? _

They both look like they want to kiss but are doing their best to stop themselves. So Christen just nods and, to make up for not kissing, probably, Tobin offers her hand for Christen to hold while she’s driving.

*

Their first stop is at a chain coffee shop that, as it turns out, they both love. It’s a little bit out of the way, but Tobin picks the one that’s closest to their second stop.

They’re waiting for their cold brews and muffins at their table, with Tobin constantly glancing at the counter, when Christen suddenly covers Tobin’s hand with hers. The action predictably makes Tobin look sheepish and realize she’s been finger tapping on the table.

_ Anxious… about something? _ Christen asks.

_ You could say that__,_ Tobin smiles shyly. _ I want this to go well… get a kiss at the end, you know, and a second date. _

Christen smiles affectionately, _ You know, I believe in this thing called… the Law of Vibration… where you set out to… vibrate your whole being… mind, body and soul… into what you seek… It tells you to… vibrate as if it is… and it will be. _

_ That sounds awesome__,_ Tobin gazes in awe. _ It kind of reminds me of a similar bible verse from Proverbs, which says, ‘As a man thinks in his heart, so is he.’ _

_ Makes sense, doesn’t it? _ Christen asks.

Tobin nods, _ It does. _

_ So can we start… vibrating as if… and thinking in our hearts that… we’ll have a great time? _ Christen beams.

_ Totally__,_ Tobin beams right back. _ You’re amazing. Do you know that? _

_ It doesn’t hurt… to be reminded sometimes,_ Christen smirks. Which makes Tobin laugh.

Their drinks and muffins arrive and Tobin asks, _ Is this your usual coffee order? _ Which starts a conversation about personal favorites that somehow leads to sharing stories about hilarious childhood shenanigans.

*

Tobin parks just in time to get to their second stop at 2:45pm. 

And the moment Christen reads the sign above the red-framed double door, her mouth drops open, _ We’re painting? _

_ And wining__,_ Tobin grins. _ It should be therapeutic. _

_ I don’t know if I can,_ Christen frets.

_ Vibrate as if you can, and you will,_ Tobin smirks.

_ Smartass,_ Christen spells out.

_ Seriously, they have an instructor who’ll walk you through it, step-by-step__,_ Tobin assures her. _ It’ll be like painting by numbers. And it’ll be fun. Also, I’ll be right beside you. _

_ Do you paint? _

_ When I can. _

Christen smiles at knowing that particular tidbit before nodding okay and laughing as Tobin fist-pumps in the middle of the sidewalk.  
*  
They wear aprons as they paint a lighthouse by the beach at sunset. And Christen fills her wine glass almost to the brim, saying, “I’m so glad that they provided alcohol for this.” Which makes Tobin laugh. (She limits her wine to a tasting portion.)

Tobin learns that the tip of Christen’s tongue sticks out between her lips when she’s concentrating. And Christen probably learns that she really likes Tobin’s touch and Tobin’s attention based on the number of times she feigns inability to follow the instructions, which compels Tobin to hold her hand to show her the appropriate brushstrokes.  
*  
When they’re done, Tobin writes her name in the lower right corner of her canvas with an extended T, Christen writes her initials in capital letters, and they agree to exchange paintings, much to their delight.

_ Thank you__,_ Christen beams. _ That was… surprisingly fun. I think I’ll bring my mom and my sisters here _.

She laughs when Tobin literally pats herself on the back, smirking.

*

They take a leisurely stroll from a parking lot downtown to their third stop, holding hands and looking so good together, with Tobin finally wearing Lauren’s black long vest.

Tobin looks so shocked to see the line outside The Basque when they get there. And Christen looks equally shocked to see the line and realize where they are.

_ This is dinner? _ She asks just to make sure.

Tobin nods.

_ I’ve wanted to dine here with my sisters… since it started getting some… buzz,_ Christen tells her with a smile.

Tobin grins.

_ Have you eaten here before? _

_ No but I have an idea what the food tastes like. I hope you’ll like it as much as I do. _

Christen beams, _ I’m sure I will._

They approach the maitre d’ hand in hand, with Christen offering to speak for both of them. And the maitre d’ beams when Christen gives Tobin’s name and tells them that their table is ready.

A member of the wait staff ushers them to their table, passing through a hall with two rows of people crowding in front of a really long bar filled with countless trays of finger food—most of them seafood on top of a baguette slice—then walking into a much wider, brighter, calmer area where the tables are.

Tobin helps Christen to her seat, which earns Tobin another gleeful look from Christen, while the waiter helps Tobin to her seat.

He says something about drinks that Tobin doesn’t catch but Christen says yes before he takes his leave. 

_ He recommended we drink Cava__,_ Christen spells out for Tobin. _ It’s Spanish… wine. I thought we should get the full… experience. I hope that’s okay. _

Tobin extends an open palm across the table for Christen to take and they hold hands as Tobin spells out, grinning, _ More than okay. _

The waiter soon comes back with a bottle, pours each of them a generous portion of Cava, and tells them, “Chef Jag has personally selected a degustation menu for you this evening, which he guarantees you will enjoy. I was instructed not to bring out the menu but if you think of something, please let me know.”

“We will. Thank you,” Christen says to him before turning to Tobin with a huge smile on her face.

_ You look impressed,_ Tobin grins.

_ Super. _

_ Super duper? _

Christen nods enthusiastically before they both break out into giggles.

They’re given plate after plate of pintxos, each one as delicious as the next, with the intervals perfectly timed.

When they’re served a small cast iron plate with baby squid and french fries, Tobin excitedly tells Christen that it’s her favorite. At first, Christen is only excited about the fries, but she ends up gushing about the squid just as much as Tobin. 

They gush even more when they’re served a bowl of lobster rice in squid ink, both claiming it’s the best rice dish they’ve ever had, and to think Christen has been to Spain and eaten paella.

Christen shares about the time she studied in Madrid, which fascinates Tobin, who shares that the only country she’s been to, outside the US, is Canada. She asks about Christen’s other travels and Christen shares about family holidays in Greece and France and National Team soccer camps in Portugal and the UK. Christen also shares being involved with an organization helping at-risk youth through soccer and hopes to visit South Africa someday.

Tobin tries to picture what it would be like, _ Will that include going on an African safari? _

Christen nods.

_ That would be totally wicked. _

_ Maybe you could join me then. _

Tobin smiles wistfully, _ Maybe I could. _

*

They've just been served two different slices of chocolate cake, marking the end of dinner, when Tobin spots Jon Aguirre walking over to their table in a white chef’s uniform with a huge grin on his face. Tobin returns the grin after her initial shock wears off from realizing that Jon is Chef Jag—Jon Aguirre Gonzales. She should’ve put two and two together sooner.

They hug each other fiercely when he reaches their table before Tobin gestures at Christen, who looks at them in wonder and extends her hand for Jon to shake.

Wait. Why does Jon call her Linda?

“Mooches grath—” Huh?

“Ah bless pan—” Whut?

“See soy Christen Press. Mooch August—” Oh, dang it.

“Christen Press? Footballista?”

“See.” What the heck?

Tobin looks so confused as Christen and Jon continue their weird and happy conversation.

Christen glances at Tobin a few times. 

And at some point, she finally signs, _ Sweetheart, don’t look so mad. We’re speaking in… Spanish,_ before turning back to speak to Jon. In Spanish.

Oh.

Oh…

She calls her Sweetheart. Or maybe it’s Honey. Or Baby? Tobin needs to clarify and ask which one she meant. But, whatever. She calls her Sweetheart!

Her dopey smile replaces her confused eyebrows.

Wait. Christen can speak Spanish?

Jon turns to Tobin again, typing on his phone, then showing it to her, _ Made you look good ;) don’t even think about taking out your wallet. This dinner is on me. _

Tobin suddenly looks overwhelmed and signs, _ Thank you._

Jon smiles, shakes his head, and signs back, _ Thank you. You. _

They hug again before Jon kisses the back of Christen’s hand. 

“Thank you so much for the wonderful dinner, Yon,” Christen beams.

“The pleasure is all mine,” Jon says. “Looking forward to seeing your family here for dinner.”

Immediately after he leaves, Christen stares at Tobin, smiling, and asks, _ You saved his house? _

Tobin shrugs then nods.

_ You’re amazing. Do you know that? _

Tobin grins, _ It doesn’t hurt to be reminded sometimes._

Christen laughs then directs their attention to their cakes, _ Can we try these now? I love chocolate._

Tobin thinks they’re delicious. But not as delicious as the look on Christen’s face whenever she takes a bite.

*

_ Did you have anything else planned… for this evening? _ Christen asks on their way back to her car.

Tobin looks shy as she shakes her head.

_ Ever been to Griffith… Observatory? _

_ I’ve always said no every time Lauren asked. _

_ Why? _

_ I think… part of me has been hoping to get my chance on an evening like this._

Christen smiles and it’s indescribable. Like she’s tickled and awestruck and disbelieving at the same time. Like she has so many feelings.

After a long pause, she says, “I’ll drive.”

*

They don’t go inside Griffith Observatory even if there’s enough time for a super quick visit before it closes.

Instead, Christen leads Tobin to a stairway on the west end of the building… and up… the roof deck.

Tobin’s face lights up when she finally sees the remarkable view of LA at night as they move closer and closer to the railing.

When they reach it, Christen asks, _ What did you have in mind… when you thought of coming here… on a night like this? _

Tobin wordlessly answers by sliding a palm across Christen’s lower back then wrapping both arms around her waist from behind.

She rests her chin on Christen’s shoulder and can feel Christen’s sigh before Christen places both hands over hers, their fingers interlaced… 

They stay like that until closing.

*

_ Would you like to come in? _ Tobin instinctively asks when Christen pulls up outside her apartment.

_ I better not,_ Christen tells her with a soft smile.

Tobin nods in understanding.

_ Can I walk you to… your door? _ Christen asks.

And Tobin nods again with a smile. 

She’s about to open the car door when Christen tells her, _ Wait. Can you stay here… for a minute? _

Tobin looks puzzled as Christen gets out of her car, walks around the front, and, oh—she opens the passenger door for Tobin with a big grin and an open palm.

Tobin takes her hand and grins just as wide before Christen closes the car door and they take the short walk to Tobin’s apartment… 

_ Thank you, Tobin. I had a really really, really really wonderful time. _

_ I had a super duper awesome time. Thank you for going out with me and taking me to Griffith Observatory and driving me home. _

Christen gives her an even more cheerful grin.

_ What? _ Tobin asks. _ What's with that smile? _

_ I’ve always wondered how it feels… you know, like in those movies… to drive a girl home… walk her to her doorstep… kiss her goodnight… _

Tobin mirrors her cheerful grin and there’s a playful glint in her eyes when she takes her keys out of her pocket then jiggles them right in front of Christen.

Christen rolls her eyes, _ Aren’t you supposed to just… fiddle with them or something? _

_ What? _ Tobin laughs. _ I want you to know how much I would like that kiss. _

Christen laughs and shakes her head then wraps her arms around Tobin’s neck.

And Tobin wraps her arms around Christen’s back, pulling her so close that Christen leans her head back a little to see Tobin’s entire face.

“Go on another date with me…” 

Tobin nods exuberantly, which makes Christen laugh again, which makes Tobin grin, which makes Christen sigh… then smile… her expression filled with longing.

She removes one hand behind Tobin’s neck to cup her face… and runs her thumb across Tobin’s lower lip… which makes Tobin kiss her thumb lightly… which makes Christen part her lips… then move her hand to Tobin’s nape.

They lean in slowly at the same time… until their lips touch… brushing gently against the other… up then down… before closing in… and they kiss… softly, languidly… eyes shut tight… and shoulders rising… 

They tilt their heads to the other side, nibbling each other’s lips along the way then switching focus to a different lip… until Christen bites Tobin’s lip a little too hard and the kiss turns bold and deep and heated… with open mouths… swirling tongues… scraping lips… digging hands… 

They stop to catch their breaths and give each other softer kisses, the tips of their tongues always seeking out the other… over… and over… and over again… until Christen lets out a sigh and gives Tobin a tender kiss on the cheek… before saying goodnight.

It takes them a while to get to sleep that night… thoughts still lingering… over that kiss… 

*

[Tobin]  
_ I’m having a hard time writing   
_ _ my article this morning _

[Christen]  
_ I scheduled my therapy   
_ _ earlier today _

[Tobin]  
_ Will you let me know when   
_ _ you're home? _

[Christen]  
_ I’ll let you know when I’m about   
_ _ to leave the clinic _

*

Tobin rings the doorbell to Christen’s house around 1pm. 

And they simply smile at each other when Christen opens the door and holds out her hand for Tobin to take.

They gaze stupidly at each other as they walk hand in hand through the foyer, looking quite at home in their athletic shorts and t-shirts. 

Of course, Tobin is wearing glasses and gets so caught up in seeing Christen that she belatedly realizes they’re walking upstairs… to another living room with a huge, L-shaped sectional sofa.

Christen doesn’t notice Tobin’s blush when they let each other’s hand go and Tobin sets her backpack down while Christen proceeds to the corner of the sofa, where a book lays open.

She picks up the book, sits on the corner with her legs stretched, spread wide, looks at Tobin, and pats the space between her legs with a smirk.

Tobin smirks back before taking a step forward. But Christen raises an eyebrow and signs, _ You’re forgetting… your laptop. _

Tobin pouts. But she does as she is told anyway and gets her laptop.

Christen giggles and folds her right leg to give Tobin room to sit.

And Tobin can’t help but notice the scars on Christen’s left knee when she sits down with her laptop on her lap. She also can’t help but lean down and start placing kisses on each scar, making Christen’s breath hitch. 

She meets Christen’s gaze long enough to see her mouthing, “Higher.”

And Tobin kisses up her thigh… taking her time…eyes trained on Christen’s smooth and delectable skin… until she reaches the hem of her shorts, grabs her calf, and starts kissing back to her knee while lifting her leg up.

Christen starts laughing. 

_ What? _Tobin rests Christen’s leg on her shoulder.

Christen grabs a pillow and throws it at her face.

_ You said higher! _ Tobin grins mischievously.

Christen shakes her head, smirking in disbelief, and takes a deep breath. _ Get over here._

Tobin does as she is told again.

*

_ What else do you usually do… on your days off? _ Christen asks after Tobin puts her laptop away.

_ Chores, mostly__,_ Tobin answers. _ But sometimes I like to hard chill the whole day. _

_ That sounds like code for… rough sex… like Netflix… and hard chill. _

_ No, it doesn't. And Netflix and hard chill is not a thing. _

_ Then what’s a hard chill _?

_ Hardcore chill. I don’t move or raise my heart rate at all. _

“Huh.” _ That definitely rules out sex. _

_ I didn’t think of that. _

_ Can we do that now? _

_ Hard chill or rough sex? _

Christen snorts and hits Tobin with another pillow.

They end up taking a nap, cuddling on the sofa, with Christen lying on Tobin’s chest… 

*

About an hour later, Tobin wakes up from the nap with a smile and Christen’s kisses on her face.

When she opens her eyes, she sees Christen sitting beside her, smiling back, then handing over her phone, which is vibrating non-stop because of texts from Lauren.

She gets up, reaches for her glasses on the table, and reads her messages while Christen checks hers.

Then Tobin types a quick reply and sets her phone down the sofa.

Christen glances at it, _ Everything okay? _

Tobin nods, _ Lauren was just checking if I’ll be fine getting dinner on my own. Her future-boyfriend asked her out to dinner. _

_ Future-boyfriend? _ Christen asks.

_ They’re not official yet__,_ Tobin clarifies. _ But she really likes him. _

_ Does that matter to you? _

_ Yes, I want her to be happy. _

_ No, I meant the… being official part. Does that matter to you? _

Tobin takes a pause and thinks about it for a while before answering, _ Honestly, that’s a bit low on the list for me _.

_ Care to… elaborate? _

_ There are more important things than putting a label on a relationship—things like trust, confidence, devotion, joy. _

_ Don’t you think… making it official… helps to establish… commitment… to each other? _

_ You’re right, it does. But you can be committed to each other regardless__,_ Tobin points out. _ Does it matter to you, making things official? _

_ It doesn’t, actually. What you said… just made me think__,_ Christen smiles softly. _ Since Lauren… is going out, can I… persuade you… to stay for dinner? _

Tobin hesitates.

_ My mom is a great cook__,_ Christen adds. _ Please? It makes more sense… for you to stay here to eat dinner than leave and… fend for yourself. _

_ You drive a hard bargain._

Christen giggles and kisses Tobin on the cheek. Then she glances at Tobin’s phone again.

_ What are you thinking? _ Tobin asks.

_ Nothing. _

_ That doesn’t look like nothing. _

Christen types on her phone and seconds later, Tobin’s phone vibrates again. But before Tobin can get it, Christen grabs it first.

The preview shows the sender is _'Can Not Lie, You Other Bros_ Cant…_'_ And Christen immediately smacks Tobin on the shoulder, “You changed my name on your phone to Baby Got Back lyrics?”

Tobin manages to look sheepish even with a smirk, _ I didn’t want to use 'My Humps?'_

Christen rolls her eyes.

_ And I love that song! _ Tobin adds. _ My brother used to rap the whole thing to me while tapping my forearm, like this _ —Tobin tries mouthing the first words to Christen while tapping her forearm to the beat—_'Oh, my God, Becky. Look at her butt _—_'_

Christen can’t resist—kissing Tobin hard and giggling at the same time.

*

Their day at the Presses’ end with a soft make-out session on the patio—after a dinner with Stacy, Cody, and Channing filled with more questions about Tobin’s family and Tobin’s jobs and more embarrassing stories about Christen—and with Christen insisting on driving Tobin home.

When they pull up outside her apartment, Tobin asks Christen again if she wants to come in and Christen, again, says no but adds, _ Maybe I can hang out this week… if you finish work early? _

_ That would be awesome _.

*

_ Guess what? _ Tobin signs after greeting Christen with a kiss to deliver Channing’s order the next day.

“What?”

_ I’ll finish work early today! _

“Really?”

_ Really, really__,_ Tobin grins. _ Just 58 deliveries, which is rare. _

“Wow. Okay.”

_ You don’t want to hang out at my apartment anymore? _

“It’s… not that.”

_ Then what’s the matter? _

_ Tobin, can you change my sign name? _

_ What? _

_ I can’t introduce… myself to Lauren… signing, ‘Hi, I’m Pretty.’ _

Tobin laughs.

“It's not funny!”

Tobin laughs harder, _ Sorry, no take backs! _

“I’m serious, Tobin.”

_ So am I__,_ Tobin laughs some more then gives Christen another kiss. _ Seriously, no take backs and—hold on, before you protest—I’ll give you the reasons why. First, you can introduce yourself to Lauren like you would any other person. She’s hearing, like you. _

“Oh. She is?”

Tobin nods.

_ Okay. Can you please slow down so I can understand… everything you sign? _ Christen requests.

_Okay,_ Tobin starts signing more slowly and carefully_._ _Second reason. No one can ever choose their own sign name or change what’s given to them. Because, third, it’s given. By a deaf person. It’s special that way. We have to like a person or know them enough to give them a sign name._

_ I’m sorry. I do find it special. I just don’t think I can introduce… myself that way. Can’t my sign name be something like… ‘soccer player’ or… just ‘CP?’ _

Tobin smiles and kisses her again, _ If you meet another deaf person and not through me, you might get a new sign name. But in the meantime—and this is the fourth reason—Lauren and I will continue to use the sign name I gave you every time you come up in conversation. Because we can’t spell your name every time like I’ve told you. And if you meet any of my deaf friends, I don’t see why I shouldn’t introduce you as C-pretty. Because you are… pretty. In fact, you’re super pretty. _

Christen can’t help but smile, _ Such a charmer… I’d roll my eyes… but I liked that too much. In fact, I like you too much. _

Tobin beams, _ You do? _

_ As if you didn’t know. _

_ I like validation, too, you know. _

_ So where’s mine? _

Tobin smirks, _ You’re so beautiful and smart and amazing, I like you very, very, very, very, very much. And I got a second date with you so when are you taking me? _

Christen snorts.

_ What? _

_ Nothing. _ Christen tries to look serious, _ Is there a chance… you can take Saturday off? I’m still checking… if I can change tickets… Otherwise… I have a back-up… plan for Sunday. _

_ Okay, I’ll ask my manager for a day off or check with the guy who covers this route on my rest days if he’s willing to switch. _

_ Thank you. Can I pick you up at work later? _

_ Oh, no, not with the traffic. As much as I’d like that, it would be better for you to go straight to my apartment than go to my workplace. _

*

[Christen]  
_ I’m here! Lauren invited me in  
_ _ She’s so nice!! I think I love   
_ _ her _

[Tobin]  
_ Heyyyyy!!! What about meeee _

[Christen]  
_ :D :D :D  
_ _ Get home safe :-* _

*

Tobin comes home to a healthy dinner prepared by Christen (which is so unexpectedly delicious Tobin feels like she isn’t effusive enough in her praise and gratitude). 

Christen and Lauren get along so well they seem like old friends. They talk about shopping and workout routines and recovery. (If it weren’t for Christen holding Tobin one way or another while she’s there, Tobin would be pouting from the lack of attention.) 

*

_ She’s even more beautiful and amazing than you've described__,_ Lauren tells Tobin after Christen leaves. _ I think I love her. _

Tobin rolls her eyes, _ That’s what she said about you. _

Lauren laughs, _ Don’t act so jealous! You’re the reason she came here. _

_ Well, you’re the one she spoke with almost the entire time, _ Tobin pouts. _ I didn’t get enough kisses. _

Lauren laughs some more, “Oh, Tobin.” _ If you must know, she came here to ask my opinion on her plans for your date on Saturday. _

_ Really? _ Tobin’s face lights up.

_ I’m not telling you anything. She mentioned it isn’t set yet. _

_ Fine. What else did she ask you? _

_ My name sign. _

Tobin laughs, _ Did you tell her you’re ‘L-curly hair?’ _

Lauren nods, “Yep.” _ I’m not sure if she felt good or bad being ‘C-pretty’ after knowing that. I had half a mind to tell her our other best friend is called ‘Lazy Princess.’ _

They both burst into laughter.

*

On Thursday, Tobin gets an eager text.

[Christen]  
_ Please please please tell me   
_ _ you found a way to get off work   
_ _ on Saturday   
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ I did :) :) :) _

[Christen]  
_ Yes!!!!  
_ _ Okay you can just hard chill   
_ _ then because I still have   
_ _ therapy  
_ _ I’ll pick you up at 5pm  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ Can I drive you to therapy? _

[Christen]  
_ I’d love that but I’d rather you   
_ _ rest  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ Okay well can I drive us to   
_ _ where we’re going?  
_

[Christen]  
_ You can drive us home :-* _

*

They all sleep in on Saturday.

It’s the first time in almost three months that Lauren and Tobin can enjoy a Saturday together and they are relishing it… by cleaning. Their whole apartment.

They take a good look at each other when they come out of their rooms for breakfast, burst into laughter, and come to the conclusion that the best way to spend half their day is to mop, wipe, vacuum, change sheets, wash sheets, rearrange and fix things. 

It makes their hard chill on the couch in front of the TV afterwards all the more rewarding.

*

_ Since you know where I’m going, what should I wear? _ Tobin asks Lauren before taking a shower first (Lauren has a date, too, but at a later time).

_ Something casual, _ Lauren tells her. _ But change it up a little? _

_ So… gray shirt? _

Lauren laughs, _ I hope she’ll make a fashionista out of you someday. Wear my gray V-neck. Lower neckline. Then bring that lightweight bomber jacket of yours. _

_ Shoes? _

_ She’ll probably wear pumps or boots. So go with your heeled boots. _

_ What would I do without you? _

_ You owe me your firstborn. _

*

Lauren can have the whole brood as far as Tobin is concerned. Because Christen is, indeed, wearing a pair of black peep toe pumps, with tight-fitting, ripped blue jeans and a gray sleeveless shirt, with her hair straightened out, looking simple and classy, yet, oh, so sexy. 

She texts Tobin that she is outside the apartment but needs to make a call. And Tobin doesn’t bother fixing her hair—all flipped to one side after fixing her boots—when she gets out the front door and is so casual about it, she looks unintentionally just as sexy.

Christen quickly ends her call when she sees Tobin with one hand in her pocket and such a swagger she has Christen transfixed.

Like a moth to a flame, Tobin beelines for Christen, leaning against her car, with their eyes locked on each other. And Tobin doesn’t stop, taking long strides, until she’s pressed against Christen, with her lips pressed against Christen’s, in a sultry, sensuous, ardent, avid, eager, earnest, steady, breathtaking… kiss.

Their eyes remain closed, with their foreheads touching, when their lips part. And Tobin loosens the grip of her hand on Christen’s waist. And Christen releases the bunched-up fabric of Tobin’s shirt in her hand to cup Tobin’s face.

A second later, Christen pulls away and Tobin opens her eyes, still in a daze. Christen is looking at her phone in her other hand before showing Tobin that Fran is calling. She answers the call without taking her eyes off Tobin and with her thumb caressing Tobin’s jaw.

She nods a few times. And bites her lip a few times. And pulls Tobin in for a quick and gentle kiss.

A moment later, she says, “Thanks. Just arrived at Tobin’s. Okay, see yah,” then ends the call.

“Hi,” Christen mouths with a soft smile.

_ Hello,_ Tobin signs with a soft smile before Christen gives her a kiss on the cheek and a hug that feels like Christen is melting into her. Tobin responds in kind and they stay this way until Christen gives her a tender kiss on her neck, then slowly pulls away, opens the passenger door, and waits for her to get in… 

Their stupid smiles are plastered on their faces throughout the drive.

*

Tobin’s jaw drops in surprise and amazement when she sees the Hollywood Bowl Marquee.

_ SIA  
_ _ TONIGHT 7:00PM SOLD OUT _

Christen chances a glance at her and beams.

*

Tobin is even more surprised and amazed when they get to their seats. 

They’re in a private box for four, close to the stage, with foldable tables and chairs, and Tobin finds two set meals (one salmon, one beef tenderloin) and two glasses of wine (one rosé and one white, which Tobin realizes later is the Portland wine she liked a lot) already on their table.

It turns out they’re on a double date with Fran and her boyfriend. (And Christen tells Tobin that Channing and Tyler are also there somewhere, in a different box, with their other friends.)

“You’re matching already?!” Fran exclaims, which makes them all laugh.

Tobin and Christen share smiles that seem to say, ‘Yeah, we look good together, don’t we?’ and ‘You bet.’

They also share their boxed dinners, splitting everything in half, except the tenderloin, which Christen lets Tobin eat all by herself.

*

Their tables are stowed, along with two chairs, when the lights go out for Sia’s first song.

Christen is standing behind Tobin, feeling snug, with her arms around Tobin’s shoulders and Tobin’s hands holding hers.

And Tobin is reveling in the feeling of being in Christen’s arms and the mounting excitement of 17,500 people. Which only grows stronger as the lights come back on—with a spotlight on Sia, standing centerstage, wearing the puffiest, most outrageous skirt Tobin has ever seen, against a square backdrop artfully framing whatever scene they’re trying to set.

Then the skirt moves, undulating like a wave, and the beat kicks in and Tobin is in awe. She can’t help but bob her head to the beat.

A while later, the skirt breaks apart to reveal dancers in costumes and her jaw drops.

She turns to Christen, head still bobbing up and down, with her mouth wide open and her eyes bright, and Christen is looking at her with that indescribable smile again before breaking into giggles… and then into song. Tobin grins, fixing her gaze at Christen, as she sings at the top of her lungs—

_“I_ _’m still breathing. I’m still breathing… I’m aliiiiiiiiiiiive…”_

—before bouncing up and down, which encourages Tobin to do the same.

_“I’m aliiiiiiiiiiiive…_"

And Tobin feels so alive.

*

_ Are you having fun so far? _ Christen asks.

Tobin nods enthusiastically.

_ I heard it’s a… visual show__,_ Christen grins, _ and thought the artist… in you might like it. _

_ Thank you. It’s amazing, _ Tobin beams. _ You’re amazing. _

*

Christen cheers so hard, along with everyone else, when the seventh song comes on and tells Tobin it’s called ‘Cheap Thrills.’

Tobin waits with bated breath to find out how it goes… And she easily understands Christen’s excitement when she starts feeling the rhythm of the song and Christen starts dancing and singing along… 

Tobin doesn’t bother watching the stage. And turns around to face Christen, dancing, swaying and bopping to the beat. Christen notices. And starts singing and dancing for Tobin.

_“Til I, hit the dance floor, hit the dance floor, I got all I need… No, I ain’t got cash, I ain’t got cash, but I got you baby… Baby I don’t need dollar bills to have fun tonight…"_

Tobin’s hands seek out Christen’s hips. 

_“Baby I don’t need dollar bills to have fun tonight…_"

Christen rests one arm on Tobin’s shoulder, dancing closer… and closer, her hand on Tobin’s nape. 

She sings closer and closer, too… until her lips are lightly grazing Tobin’s cheek… Tobin’s jaw… Tobin’s neck… 

*

By the time the last song comes on and Tobin is facing the stage again, Christen has kissed Tobin’s neck, covertly, deliberately, many times over… 

*

Tobin doesn’t want the night to end.

When she pulls up outside her apartment, she tries asking again, _ Would you like to come in? _

Christen gives her a steady intent look and signs, _ Yes. _

And Tobin suddenly doesn’t know what to do with herself. Her heart starts hammering in her chest, wondering if it means what she thinks it means, _ Okay… let me just… fix… _

She parks Christen’s car closer to the curb before turning off the engine and unlocking the car.

Christen doesn’t wait for her to open the door and gets out of the car then waits with an outstretched hand, which Tobin clutches firmly when she reaches her.

They walk hand in hand to the apartment… through the front door… across the living room… then the kitchen, where they stop.

_ Do you want anything? _ Tobin asks.

Christen’s gaze doesn’t waver when she replies, _ You. _

Tobin meets her gaze and offers her hand and Christen takes it with one hand and clasps Tobin’s elbow with the other.

They amble towards Tobin’s room, pressed against each other’s sides… 

And Christen only lets go when they enter the room and Tobin turns the lamp on then closes the door.

When she turns around, Christen has placed her shoes neatly against the wall, her back turned to Tobin and her thumbs hooked on the waistband of her jeans. She starts shimmying slowly… out of it. And Tobin swiftly unzips her boots and takes them off and—fuck—Christen is wearing a thong. She glances back at Tobin as if to check if she has drawn her rapt attention before turning around to face her. And Tobin promptly removes her shirt, chest visibly heaving, up and down, in shallow breaths.

They don’t take their eyes off each other as they step closer… and closer… close enough to touch… with Christen’s fingers trailing along Tobin’s neck, then down the middle of her chest… and Tobin’s hands grasping the hem of Christen’s shirt and pulling it up… and off… Christen… unbuttoning and unzipping Tobin’s jeans… then pulling them down… Tobin… sliding them off and standing… in her boxer briefs.

Their gazes fall to each other’s lips, a split second, and they’re kissing, lips pressed together, melding as their bodies do and firmly as their arms around each other… 

Their bodies and lips fuse, moving in tandem—heads tilting further, mouths opening wide, and hands making their way across each other’s backs… unhooking each other’s bras… then sliding the straps off each other’s shoulders… parting long enough to slip them off… before wrapping their arms around each other again and groaning at the contact.

And they kiss again… 

…turning their bodies bit by bit… and jaunting… towards the bed… until their lips part slowly, gradually… and Christen’s hands glide down from Tobin’s shoulders to her arms to her hands… holding them as she sits… on the bed… their eyes scanning each other’s bodies… keenly, zealously… before Tobin bends down, Christen leans back, and their lips meet again in a deep and fervent kiss… 

And they crawl into bed as they kiss… 

And they kiss… as they hold each other close… with Tobin’s hand behind Christen’s back… Christen’s hand behind Tobin’s head… and Christen’s leg folded up against Tobin’s hips… 

And they hold each other closer… with Christen running her hands up and down Tobin’s back as Tobin kisses her neck… from the back of her ear… down the side of her neck… to her collarbone… and the hollow of her throat, and up… the other side… 

And Christen arches her back… with her mouth wide open… as Tobin brings a nipple into her mouth… sucking and lapping and scraping and tugging… and doing it all over again… to her other nipple… 

And Christen nods… after Tobin gives her a questioning look with fingers running along the waistband of her underwear… before taking them off… 

And they can’t help but smile… when Tobin lifts Christen’s left leg and lays it on her shoulder… kissing from her ankle… to her shin… lingering on her injured knee… then continuing up her thigh… her inner hip… her waist… across her stomach… then down to where Tobin really wants to be… 

And Tobin can’t help but lift her gaze to see Christen’s face… as she flicks her tongue and curls her fingers… then pumps them in, out, in, out, in, out… and words come tumbling out of Christen’s mouth… 

“Faster, Tobin.”

“Harder.”

“Fuck.”

And Christen writhes. And rocks her hips. Against Tobin’s mouth and eager tongue. With her walls throbbing, contracting, closing in. On Tobin’s fingers. Her head turned. To the side. Mouth wide open. Eyes shut tight. Hands gripping the sheets.

And Tobin doesn’t stop. Rubbing her mouth, her tongue against Christen. Hitting the spot. With the tips of her fingers. Sliding. Forward. And backward. And forward. And backward. Over. And over. Feeling her. Coming.

And Christen stills for a second, head bent forward and stomach clenched, before arching her back and throwing her head back and squirming and pulling Tobin by her hair and panting and panting and panting… and panting… and panting… a sheen of sweat coating their bodies… as Tobin catches her breath… removing her fingers out of Christen carefully… then kissing her way up Christen’s waist… Christen’s stomach… Christen’s chest… Christen’s neck… and staying there because Christen has grabbed a hold of her and is holding her tight.

They stay that way for a minute or two (or five). Before Christen turns to Tobin, with glassy eyes open, and kisses her, slowly, turning them over, until Tobin is on her back with Christen on top

She pulls away from their kiss, takes a good look at Tobin, and smiles as she says, “My turn…”

*

Tobin swears she can see colors bursting behind her eyelids as she comes.

She feels Christen's kisses traveling from her inner hip to her waist to her abs to her rib to her left breast to her collarbone to her neck and finally, to her lips… 

Then Christen pulls away and Tobin opens her eyes and sees Christen above her, propped on her elbows. 

Her lips are swollen. And she’s smirking.

_ You look smug, _ Tobin tells her.

“I can’t help it,” Christen grins, “I loved all the noises you made.”

_ I was loud? _

Christen enthusiastically nods, “So loud… You should be thankful Lauren isn’t here.”

_ Or I’ll never hear the end of it? _

Christen giggles and nods again.

Tobin grins back, _ Worth it. _

Christen bites her lip, then says, “Let me hear those noises again.”

*

Tobin can get used to this… 

…waking up to Christen… waking up with Christen… waking up with Christen in her arms… naked… 

Tobin can’t help but smile to herself as she feasts her eyes on Christen… her lips slightly parted as she sleeps, her shoulders, her arms, her hand, her back, her thigh, her luscious… behind, partially covered by the blanket… 

Tobin can’t help but reach out… kneading from her thigh… to her arm… 

Christen stirs… 

And Tobin waits for her to open her eyes… 

And she does, immediately offering Tobin a smile before snuggling closer, moving her hand to Tobin’s neck.

Tobin kisses what her lips can reach.

Christen draws her head back a bit to see Tobin’s face. Tobin gazes back and starts caressing her face until she holds Tobin’s hand and kisses her palm.

She glances at the clock in Tobin’s room then whines, “Why are we awake so early?”

_ Sorry, _ Tobin looks sheepish.

And Christen realizes that she has Tobin’s other arm trapped underneath her and releases it.

Tobin lies on her side. So does Christen.

_ Good morning, _ Tobin smiles.

_ Good morning, _ Christen smiles back. _ Do you need… to go somewhere? _

_ Church. _

“Oh, right…” 

_ Would you like to come with? _

Christen hesitates.

_ You don’t have to if you don’t want to, I mean, you can stay here while I go. _

Christen pouts.

And Tobin laughs, _ Okay, not that then. I would love if you could come. And before you say no, will you hear me out? _

Christen nods.

_ It’s not to… I don’t know… persuade you to start going to church or force my faith just… somewhere you can accompany me to? Like… you going somewhere and I’m just… there, _ Tobin sighs in annoyance. _ It is so early I can’t explain myself properly. _

Christen gives her a kind smile, _ It’s okay. I understand… what you’re saying. _

_ I just thought, since I’ve been praying for you, it would be nice to pray beside you. _

Christen looks like she wants to kiss Tobin. But she doesn’t. Instead, she simply signs, _ Okay. _

Tobin’s face lights up, _ Okay? _

Christen beams and nods.

Tobin looks so excited, _ Okay so we go to church. I’m sure Lauren will be there. And then lunch with her and her guy probably? And if you want, we can go wherever afterwards, hang out at your house, or come back here. _

Christen smirks, _ And we’ll have sex all day? _

Tobin smirks back, _ That depends. _

_ On what? _

_ Will you show me those yoga poses you’ve talked about? _

They grin at each other.

“Can’t say no to that,” Christen says before pulling Tobin in for a kiss.

Oh, yes. Tobin can definitely get used to this.

*


	4. Fragile

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To lucianafromnaples and to you (including you Heath17_KO5), thank you for being here.

Christen, apparently, really likes to follow routine.

She tells Tobin to go ahead with breakfast when they finally get out of bed because she always starts her day with a 20-minute meditation.

_ And then breakfast? _ Tobin asks adorably.

Christen giggles, _ Yes. And then yoga. So you can… shower then. _

_ I can wait. _

Christen raises an eyebrow, _ For? _

_ For you to finish yoga, before I shower, _ Tobin smiles a little too innocently, _ with you. _

Christen just looks at Tobin for a second, with her mouth agape, before a soft smile on her face blooms and she shakes her head ever so slightly, biting her lower lip, with a shaky sigh.

“Oh, you’re something else, Tobin Heath.”

Tobin grins… 

…and makes good on her promise of waiting… before stepping into the shower with Christen… then getting on her knees…   
*  
Tobin might have bitten off more than she can chew, though, because Christen seems to be feeling all sorts of sexy after hopping out of the shower.

And now she’s standing in front of Tobin’s closet, wearing one of Tobin’s new (and unused) white boxer briefs and nothing else, systematically searching through Tobin’s closet for something to wear, with her hair still wrapped in a towel, and taking her sweet, sweet time.

Tobin might actually, literally, be drooling.

She’s sitting on her bed in her bra and jeans, already forgetting what she’s supposed to be doing, and just… gawking… at Christen. Those boxer briefs are a little bit loose on her but on Christen? They’re filled up and yet… they’re still showing a portion of Christen’s underbutt.

Christen turns to her, holding her white dress shirt by the hanger, with a questioning look.

Tobin nods.

So Christen removes the dress shirt from the hanger, returns the hanger to the closet, forgoes wearing a bra, and puts the dress shirt on. 

Then she bends forward, meticulously dries her hair with the towel, and does a hair flip so magnificent it’s like she’s shooting a shampoo commercial.

Tobin thinks she might have moaned. Because, suddenly, Christen looks at her with surprise written on her face, followed by a series of other reactions in a matter of seconds—from astonishment, to conceit, to fondness, affection, conviction, to boldness… 

With her eyes locked on Tobin, she starts folding the left sleeve, leaving the dress shirt unbuttoned and a sliver of her skin still exposed.

If there is such a thing as a reverse striptease, Tobin has just discovered it. And it’s way sexier than Tobin can imagine.

Christen folds the right sleeve… 

And Tobin wills herself to move.

She stands up and starts walking towards Christen as Christen starts buttoning the shirt from the bottom… up… 

By the time she fastens the second to the last button, Tobin’s lips are on hers. And they’re kissing, fervidly… until Tobin moves to kiss Christen’s neck and Christen puts a stop to it with a hand on Tobin’s shoulder, which prompts Tobin to look at her.

Christen slowly shakes her head, _ We’re going to church. _

_ So we can’t make out? _ Tobin asks innocently.

Christen tries really hard not to smile, _ If we keep going… we won’t make it. _

Tobin glances at the clock and smirks, _ We’ll make it. _

Christen gives her an admonishing look, “Tobin.”

_ Trust me, _ Tobin grins. _ We’ll make it. _

Then she goes for another kiss. And Christen doesn’t stop her.

*

Tobin’s stupid smile doesn’t leave her face even as she closes her eyes, bows her head, and clasps her hands to pray.

She thanks God for the way He has transformed her life and how He has given her purpose and meaning and… love… 

Is this love?

If Tobin is wondering, then it might not be—not yet anyway… 

But then she feels Christen’s hand slotting in between hers and joining her in prayer and Tobin knows she’s well on her way… trusting God’s greater plan even more. 

*

_ Did you take full advantage of the fact that I wasn’t home last night? _ Lauren smirks as she asks Tobin.

Tobin looks mortified, _ Christen can sign, Lauren! _

Lauren laughs, “Sorry, Chris, I just love teasing this one.” She points at Tobin with her thumb. “Can’t help it.”

Christen gives her an embarrassed smile and says, “No worries.”

“Judging from your blush, though, I’d say the answer is yes.”

_ Lauren! _ Tobin chides.

But Christen lets out a chuckle, “You got me there. I did take full advantage.”

Tobin groans and Lauren laughs some more. 

They’re waiting for the food they ordered at an all-day brunch place in Santa Monica with Lauren’s future boyfriend Jrue, who looks on them with amusement.

He’s a tall, handsome young man (a future NBA player), with eyes and a smile that are just as kind as Lauren’s. (Tobin really likes him.)

_ Do we need to buy a dining table now? _ Lauren smirks again as she asks Tobin.

Tobin rolls her eyes, _ Stop it. _

Christen looks confused.

“Fine,” Lauren says before addressing Christen. “How did you learn to sign, Chris? I’ve been meaning to ask.”

“Oh, uhm,” Christen blushes more furiously, “through one of my closest friends, Nima…” 

_ She means ex-boyfriend, _ Tobin signs.

“...whom Tobin has no reason to be jealous of,” Christen adds, giving Tobin the side-eye.

And Tobin immediately ducks her head, looking chastised.

“Wow, you’re good,” Lauren tells Christen then turns to Tobin. _ And you’re whipped. _

_ Shut up. _

Lauren grins, “Go on, Chris.”

Christen smiles, “Well, he’s been learning ASL since high school, so I asked him to teach me how to sign a few sentences to talk to Tobin.”

“And he’s been teaching you since?”

“Oh, no, he was only around for a month so I,” Christen hesitates, “I got an online tutor.”

Lauren grins even wider and just nods in understanding.

It’s Tobin who asks to confirm, _ You got an online tutor to learn sign? _

Christen shrugs, _ I thought it would be best… if I made the first move. _

Lauren laughs again and tells Jrue what they’ve been talking about so far.

Tobin wants to look offended but, with Christen’s teasing smile, all she really wants to do is kiss her.

*

They kiss as soon as they close the door to Tobin’s apartment, taking full advantage (again) of the fact that Lauren is spending the rest of the day with Jrue and won’t be coming home until late in the evening.

Christen seems to be on a mission to make Tobin moan louder this afternoon than she ever did last night. (Or this morning.)

*

They’ve been cuddling (naked) for several minutes, with Tobin’s heart rate back to normal, when Tobin turns both their bodies (to lie) on their sides and starts pulling away… only to be met by a whining and pouting Christen.

“I wanted more cuddles.”

So Tobin maneuvers them back to how they were seconds ago: with Tobin lying on her back and Christen on top, nuzzling her face against Tobin’s neck.

Then Tobin writes ‘Ok’ on Christen’s back with her finger. And Christen stills.

She abruptly props herself on her elbows, studies Tobin’s face for a second, detaches herself from Tobin, then lies on her side.

This baffles Tobin, who follows Christen’s lead and lies on her side, facing Christen with her eyebrows furrowed.

_ “I’m sorry,” _ Christen says and signs at the same time. _ “Are you more comfortable… like this?” _

Tobin looks surprised and quickly wraps her arm around Christen and kisses her, _ It’s not what you think. I’m sorry. It’s just… force of habit. _

_ You always ended up like this with… other women? _ Christen asks.

Tobin nods, _ Out of necessity really. What if one of us wanted to say something? It was best that we faced each other. It’s not like we whispered sweet nothings in each other’s ears. _

_ I’m so sorry— _

_ No, please. _

_ —that didn’t cross my mind. _

_ Please don’t worry about it. We can do our own thing. For a moment there I thought you were upset. I don’t want you upset. _

Christen shakes her head then beams and gives Tobin a tender kiss, _ I don’t want you upset either. _

_ I wasn’t. I’m not. We can cuddle all you want, _ Tobin grins, _ cuddle monster. _

Christen narrows her eyes but is smirking, _ You better not start… calling me that. _

Tobin laughs, _ What would you prefer? _

_ Do you also assign nicknames? _

_ When you think about it, name signs are nicknames. _

_ Lauren calls me ‘Chris,’ _ Christen spells out.

_ And you want a name sign for it that’s different from Christen? _

Christen nods adorably, _ It would be nice if you called me Chris… and to know when you’re calling me Chris. _

_ You really want a different name sign, don’t you? _

Christen pouts again.

Tobin laughs and kisses her again before asking, _ Do you have other nicknames? _

Christen finger spells her other nicknames as she tells Tobin, _ My parents call me Mo… because I’m the original Morena… and my teammates call me Press… and Presi. Do you have a nickname? _

_My friends and family call me Tobs, _Tobin spells out, _in group chats and stuff,_ _and unfortunately, Toby._

_ Why unfortunately? Toby is cute, _ Christen giggles.

It’s Tobin’s turn to pout, _ I don’t like being called Toby. _

_ Well, what do you prefer? _

_ Sweetheart, _ Tobin smirks.

Christen rolls her eyes, _ Of course, you remember that. _

_ Of course, _ Tobin grins. _ I’ve been distracted by your hotness but I’ve wanted to ask what you meant. _

_ What do you mean? _

_ Did you mean Sweetheart, _ Tobin finger spells, _ or Honey or Baby? _

_ Oh, that, _ Christen grins. _ I’m not telling you. _

_ Oh, come on! _

_ Isn’t that the point of one sign… with three meanings? At any given time… it can mean any of those three? _

_ So you’re really not telling me? _

_ I’m telling you… that it means… whatever you want it to mean. _

Tobin furrows her brows and—

_ Baby, please stop pouting, _ Christen smirks.

Tobin narrows her eyes but can’t seem to help the tickled smile that’s starting to show on her face.

_ Honey, admit it. It’s a great idea, _ Christen’s smile grows bigger.

Tobin starts to chuckle.

_ Sweetheart? _

Tobin full-on grins, _ Yes, sweetheart? _

Christen is positively glowing, _ Kiss me again. _

_ Anything you want, baby. _

*

_ Can I just drive right now and bring you home… since you’re already in my car? _ Christen smiles her most charming smile.

_ Honey, I believe the word you’re looking for is kidnap, _ Tobin tells her.

_ Not if you go willingly, _ Christen retorts.

Tobin smiles softly and kisses her before saying, _ I’m sorry I have to work tomorrow. _

_ Me too, _ Christen sighs, _ but we shouldn’t be. _

Tobin nods, _ I know. We had an awesome weekend. _

Christen smiles softly and kisses her, _ We did. Thank you for swapping… shifts and making it possible. _

Tobin leans in for another kiss… _ Thank you for everything. _

Christen goes back for another… and then another… _ You’ve spoiled me… Now I want weekends and Mondays with you. _

_ We’ll have half a weekend and Monday again soon, _ Tobin tells her, _ and that doesn’t sound so bad. _

Christen nods, looking sadder than she was a few seconds ago, _ You’re right. That isn’t so bad. Who knows? Maybe one of my… neighbors ordered something. _

Tobin grins, _ I’ll let you know as soon as I’m done loading my van. _

_ Promise? _

Tobin holds out her pinky, which makes Christen laugh before she locks their pinkies together and seals them with a kiss.

And they share another kiss…

And Christen sighs again when they part, “I should get going or I’ll never leave.”

_ Then don’t leave. _

_ Don’t tempt me. It’s why I asked… to say goodnight in the car. _

_ I don’t know about you but the backseat is pretty tempting. _

“Tobin.”

_ Why is it so bad for you to stay another night? _

_ You need to rest. _

_ And I won’t be able to rest if you stay? _

“Maybe.”

_ I can behave. _

_ What if I can’t? _

_ We can skip ahead to naked cuddling. Maybe it’ll trick our bodies into thinking we’re… happily sated. _

_ You forgot the sweaty part… It should be sweaty, naked cuddling. _

They both fall silent for a moment before Tobin admits, _ Okay, maybe I can’t behave. _

And they burst into laughter.

Then they hold hands.

Then Tobin kisses Christen’s hand.

And Christen does the same before letting Tobin’s hand go and bidding Tobin, _ Goodnight, sweetheart. _

_ Goodnight… _ Tobin gives Christen a quick kiss, before opening the passenger door, then closing it and waiting for Christen to roll down the window. _ Please let me know when you’re home? _

Christen nods.

_ Drive safe. _

Christen waves with her fingers, gives Tobin air-kisses, then drives away.

Tobin releases the breath that she’s been holding since saying goodnight. 

A different term of endearment crosses her mind. And she almost uses it.

*

[Christen]  
_ Is it too soon to tell you   
_ _ I miss you?  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ I wanted to tell you I miss you   
_ _ when you told me you were  
_ _ home last night  
_ _ At least you waited until after we   
_ _ said gooob morning lol _

[Christen]  
_ Lol  
_ _ I had a feeling you were sleepy _

[Tobin]  
_ I was  
_ _ I didn’t realize I was tired _

[Christen]  
_ I knew it  
_ _ I knew you were tired  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ Fine, I’ll start working out again  
_ _ You don’t have to rub it in my   
_ _ face that you have an athlete’s   
_ _ stamina _

[Christen]  
_ Oh gosh   
_ _ I almost said something filthy  
_ _ What have you done to me?  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ Please don’t stop on my   
_ _ account lol  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ :P  
_ _ I miss you  
_ _ Drive safe  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ I miss you  
_ _ Hope your therapy goes well _

*

They spend more than two hours texting about their day and the assigned topic for Tobin’s article before remembering that it's Monday night and realizing that if they go to sleep soon, it’ll be Tuesday sooner.

*

Tobin grins in surprise when she parks in front of Christen’s house and sees Christen walking towards the van.

And as soon as the engine dies, Christen hops into the passenger seat and wastes no time in greeting Tobin with a long, burning, yearning kiss… that leaves Tobin feeling a little punch-drunk. 

_ Missed me that much? _ Tobin asks.

_ You have no idea. _

Tobin smiles, _ I think I have a pretty good idea. Can I see you later? I’ll get off work early again today. _

_ So I can get you off early today, too? _

Tobin fake-gasps, _ Christen Press! _

And Christen laughs so hard, with so much glee, looking mighty pleased with her joke, that Tobin can’t help but chuckle and gaze at her like her laughter is the greatest thing since sliced bread.

*

Tobin is out the door of her hub by 4:16pm.

And she starts jogging and grinning from ear to ear when she finds Christen’s car in the visitors parking area.

As if sensing Tobin close by, Christen gets out of the car and grins just as wide as soon as her eyes land on Tobin.

When Tobin reaches her, Tobin immediately grabs her by the waist and plants a deep, long, eager, ardent, hungry, searing kiss… that leaves her breathless… 

It takes a while before she opens her eyes… 

And Tobin is smirking when she does, _ Told you I have a pretty good idea. _

“What?”

_ Of how much you missed me. _

Christen gapes at Tobin, then chuckles, and smirks, _ Not it. _

_ No? _

_ No, _ Christen teasingly shakes her head. _ But you’re getting warmer. _

Tobin playfully pouts.

And Christen chuckles again, _ Would you drive us to your apartment? _

_ Okay. _

Before Tobin can make a move, Christen opens the driver’s door wide and motions for Tobin to get in. And Tobin reluctantly does before Christen closes the door and goes around the car.

But just before Christen reaches the passenger side, Tobin reaches over the seat to open the door for her from the inside. And the gesture, of course, makes them both grin like fools again.

Tobin stays put, leaning towards the passenger seat, with her right elbow on the armrest and an expectant look on her face, as Christen takes a seat and closes the door. Then Christen cups Tobin’s face with both hands and kisses her soundly (exactly what Tobin hopes she’ll do).

_ Is this why you asked me to text you once I was done with my last delivery? _ Tobin asks. _ To pick me up without telling me? _

_ Didn’t want to risk… you saying no again if I asked. _

_ Sneaky. _

Christen gives her a quick kiss.

And Tobin finally notices her all-Nike outfit (orange training shoes, white shorts, and gray half-zip running top) and her hair up in a neat ponytail. _ Where did you come from? _

_ The gym. _

_ You worked out? _

Christen nods, _ I’m getting ready… to run again soon. _

_ Oh, right, cool, _ Tobin blushes. _ For a moment there I thought it was unfair—you working out so soon and I haven’t even started. I feel like Thoughts of Dog. I just found out that— _

_ —not everything is about you? _

_ And I’m devastated. To say the least. _

They both laugh.

_ That tweet is one of my favorites, _ Christen tells Tobin.

_ Mine, too. _

_ Well, you should know that I also went… grocery shopping. And I hope… you’re okay with fish for dinner. _

Tobin beams, _ You’ll cook for me again? _

Christen nods and smiles, looking so adorable that Tobin can’t help but kiss her again before finally driving them home.

*

Tobin starts unpacking the shopping bag in the kitchen when Christen tells her to go get changed.

_ I wanna help. _

_ You should finish your article… since you weren’t able to… yesterday. And I already know my way… around your kitchen. _

_ But— _

_ I’m staying the night. _

_ You are? _ Tobin grins.

_ Finish your article, _ Christen beams.

And Tobin kisses her enthusiastically—_ Wait. Did you just bribe me with sex? _

Christen laughs.  
*  
She’s folding the shopping bag and deciding where to stow it when Tobin comes back to the kitchen, wearing flip flops, a pair of super loud printed shorts, and a graphic tee, with her hair down, and holding her black slides.

She drops them by Christen’s feet, which earns her a grateful smile from Christen, who promptly sets the bag down on the counter, then places her left hand on Tobin’s shoulder for support and slips off her right shoe.

She gives Tobin a quick kiss before folding her leg up to remove her sock and sliding her foot into the sandal. Then she switches hands and does the same to her other foot.

She gives Tobin another kiss before Tobin squats to pick up her shoes and she stuffs her socks in them. Then she holds Tobin’s arm as if to ask Tobin to wait, smiles sweetly with a lip bite, unzips her long sleeve shirt, and slowly takes it off, leaving a black tank top with a low neckline underneath.

Tobin can’t resist.

As soon as Christen pulls the shirt off her head, Tobin’s mouth is on the side of her neck, kissing the length of it… down to her collarbone… and the top of her breast… 

And Tobin’s free hand starts caressing her thigh, kneading underneath her shorts, thumb stroking along her inner hip and dangerously close to where they both want it to be… until Tobin’s palm goes around her thigh then up… massaging her glorious ass, underneath another layer of fabric… 

Tobin leaves a mark on Christen’s breast… before kissing her way up Christen’s neck more tenderly… gently biting Christen’s chin… kissing Christen’s bottom lip… flicking her tongue… until Christen opens her mouth, inviting Tobin in, meeting her tongue, and moaning hard enough that Tobin can feel it… 

Then Christen offers the full length of her tongue and Tobin readily takes it… drawing it into her mouth… until they both run out of breath… 

Their eyes meet.

And Tobin is smirking again, spelling out, _ Warmer? _

Christen bites her lower lip again and smiles, shaking her head in disbelief, then takes a deep breath before imploring, _ Baby, please… finish… your article. _

_ Okay… _ Tobin acquiesces. And that other term of endearment springs to mind again.  
*  
Instead of working on her article at her desk like she usually does, Tobin decides to bring her laptop and desk chair to the kitchen.

Christen beams when she sees Tobin wearing glasses and placing the chair at the end of the cabinet on the side of the gas range and then her phone and laptop on the counter, before flashing a big smile at Christen and sitting down.

_ Can you please text Lauren? _ Christen asks.

Tobin nods and sends Lauren a text before bringing her laptop to her lap and opening it.

They both get on with their tasks wordlessly for a while until Tobin’s phone vibrates.

And Tobin laughs when she reads Lauren’s reply, drawing Christen’s attention.

_ Lauren says she’ll take advantage of you being here and have her own sleepover, _ Tobin grins.

_ At Jrue’s? _ Christen grins back.

Tobin nods and they just grin at each other until Christen motions for Tobin to keep typing and Tobin puckers her lips to ask for a kiss.

Christen shakes her head, which, of course, makes Tobin pout, which, in turn, makes Christen giggle. But she doesn’t give in so Tobin sighs and continues writing.

A minute later, Tobin’s phone vibrates again and Christen quickly grabs it to read the preview with her new contact name: _ ‘Cuddle Monster.’ _

She snorts then shakes her head, _ How often do you change this? _

Tobin is torn between teasing and giving an honest answer. But she goes for the latter, _ Whenever I think of something new I really like. _

_ And you do this for all… your contacts? _

Tobin smiles sweetly, _ No, sweetheart. Just you. _

This time, without prompting, Christen gives Tobin a heartfelt, tender kiss… 

Then they carry on with cooking and writing, beaming.  
*  
They catch each other staring so many times, it’s a wonder that hundreds of words get typed, no fingers get sliced, and the fish fillet doesn’t get burned.

*

When they sit on the couch for dinner, Christen smiles, _ You do need a dining table. _

Tobin laughs, _ I’m sorry. It’s been months of takeout in front of the TV so we didn't really think about getting one until recently. _

_ We can schedule that… if you want. _

_ Buying a dining set? _

Christen nods, _ Please remind me? _

_ Okay, _ Tobin nods before turning to their food (consisting of fish fillet, quinoa, and salad) that Christen has arranged beautifully on their plates, which are now on the coffee table, then turning back to Christen, beaming, then back to the food, then back to Christen, then back to the food, then back to Christen, who starts giggling then cups Tobin’s face with one hand and kisses her…   
*  
Tobin gushes after tasting the fillet, _ This is so good. Thank you! _

_ What about the quinoa? _ Christen asks.

_ It’s… healthy? _

Christen laughs, _ Are you going to finish it? _

_ Absolutely! _ Tobin smiles. _ Because you prepared it. _

_ Really? _

Tobin nods, _ I’m not a fan. But it’s not bad. Unlike vegan cookies, which taste nothing like real cookies. _

Christen laughs again.

They talk more about food in between bites (because Christen realizes that Tobin loves food) until Tobin exclaims, _ Oh, I keep forgetting to tell you. _

_ What? _

_ My editor liked the yoga article and told me to submit unassigned articles when I have them. _

_ That’s great, Tobin! _ Christen cheers. _ Congratulations. _

_ Thanks to you, _ Tobin beams. _ So I’ve been thinking— _

“Oh, no.”

Tobin laughs.

And Christen gives her a self-satisfied grin, _ Tell me. _

_ Well, I’ve been reading a lot of articles on ACL reconstruction lately. _

_ You have? _

Tobin nods, _ Almost all of them are about what to expect with mobility and other physical aspects of recovery. _

Christen nods, paying close attention to what Tobin is signing.

_ But you meditate and do yoga, on top of your exercises, which, to me, means you care as much about mental recovery as the physical one. _

_ And you’d like to… write about that… with my help? _

_ Is that something you’d be okay with? _

_ Can I think about it? _

_ Of course. Thank you for even just considering it. You being my favorite topic wasn’t just a line you know. _

_ And what you’ve just said isn’t? _ Christen raises an eyebrow.

_ That depends, _ Tobin grins. _ Is it working? _

Christen looks absolutely charmed but does her best not to grin but finds it impossible to suppress a smile, _ Finish your quinoa. _

Tobin laughs again.

*

She’s washing the dishes, with her hair up in a high messy bun, when Christen comes back to the kitchen (from her room) and leisurely wraps both arms around her midsection from behind then plants a lingering kiss at her nape. Tobin stops what she’s doing, her eyes closing at the feeling of Christen’s front against her back, Christen’s arms holding her tight, and Christen’s lips against her skin… 

It’s as if time really stands still as they stand in front of the sink unmoving… relishing their embrace… 

Then a soft smile creeps across Tobin’s face with her eyes fluttering open and both of them moving slowly, unhurriedly, as Tobin continues to wash the dishes and Christen places more tender kisses at the nape of her neck… on her shoulders… any part of her body within reach… 

When the last plate has been put away and Tobin wipes her hands dry, she turns around to face Christen, who slackens her grip but doesn’t let go.

They smile as Tobin leans against the sink and Christen automatically closes the gap between them, with Tobin cupping Christen’s face with both hands, her thumbs caressing Christen’s cheeks, studying Christen’s face as if committing it to memory.

They lean in slowly at the same time… and they kiss… with their eyes closing… and their bodies seemingly melting at the contact… 

Tobin takes a few steps forward, nimbly moving them away from the sink, as they kiss… taking their time… savoring each other’s lips… and each other’s tongues… 

And they move apart eventually, briefly, only for Tobin to start kissing Christen’s neck, with Christen’s arms traveling up from Tobin’s back to her shoulders and Tobin’s hands traveling down to Christen’s waist to her hips to the back of her thighs. Then Tobin wraps her arms just below Christen’s butt and lifts her up. And Christen instinctively wraps her legs around Tobin’s waist, gasping… in surprise.

Tobin looks up. Christen meets her gaze. 

Then she smiles and says, “Warmer.”

Tobin grins. And carries Christen to bed. With Christen kissing her cheek, her jaw… nibbling her ear… leaving marks… on her neck… 

*

It only takes a minute after Christen comes for her to start kissing Tobin again, flip them over, and sit on Tobin’s stomach, straddling Tobin, fixing her disheveled hair by removing her hair tie then putting her hair up in a bun, and smirking.

_ Have I finally got it? _ Tobin asks.

_ How much I missed you? _

Tobin nods as Christen bends down to give her a sultry kiss… 

“Let me show you.”  
*  
Whatever Christen is doing with her mouth between Tobin’s legs is driving Tobin so crazy that she covers her forehead with both hands then pulls her own hair at one point and slams her hands down on the bed then grips the sheets at another.  
*  
Christen makes Tobin come two consecutive times. And Tobin can only lie limp, breathing heavily, with her eyes still closed, as Christen leaves a trail of kisses up her body… 

She only makes an effort to move once Christen is kissing her neck, wrapping her arms around Christen’s shoulders.

This time, Tobin knows better not to cut Christen’s cuddle time short and just holds Christen close, for as long as she wants…   
*  
It’s not that long before Christen props herself up on her elbows and kisses Tobin again. And Tobin finally opens her eyes when their lips part.

“Hi,” Christen smiles.

_ Hi, _ Tobin mouths back with a smile just as soft.

“You’ll let me know if you want to talk about something?” Christen asks.

Tobin nods, looking at Christen like she hung the moon. And the stars.

“Stop…”

Tobin gives her a questioning look.

“Stop looking at me like I’m the most beautiful woman in the world.”

Tobin fake-gasps, _ You mean you aren’t?! _

Christen bursts into giggles, absolutely tickled, before giving Tobin another kiss and grinning, “Not while you’re around.”

_ Wow, _ Tobin gapes at her, _ that’s a good one. _

“I’m learning from the—” 

_ Best. _

“—dorkiest.”

_ Best dorkiest? _ Tobin smirks. _ I’ll take it. _

Christen snorts and giggles again. And Tobin’s kisses can’t seem to stop them.

So Tobin sits on the bed as she kisses Christen’s neck, bringing Christen along with her until Christen is straddling her thighs, then lifts Christen up, high enough to fold her legs to kneel on the bed. 

And then she moves her left hand to touch Christen’s wet—

Christen gasps.

And they get lost in each other’s eyes as Tobin’s fingers get to work.

*

The blissed-out smile on Tobin’s face stays with her until she wakes up the following morning. 

And it only grows bigger once her eyes adjust in the semi-darkness and land on Christen’s sleeping form.

Christen is lying on her side, facing Tobin, with her left arm draped across Tobin’s stomach and her left leg on Tobin’s thighs.

Tobin doesn’t want to move. And just… stares… 

But then Christen moves to lie on her back and it breaks the spell Tobin is on.

She glances at the clock. It’s 5:13am and she really needs to get out of bed.

She sighs… and stares some more…   
*  
By 5:49am, she’s dressed in her uniform, sitting on the bed beside Christen, and leaning down for a gentle kiss or two or three—as many as it takes to wake Christen up, really. And she does on the seventh kiss (near the mole on her neck).

Even in her groggy, grumpy state, Christen immediately asks, “Leaving soon?”

Tobin nods, looking like a kicked puppy.

Christen manages to smile softly with her arms wide open, asking for a hug.

And Tobin bends down to hug her close, with both of them kissing whatever spot they can kiss as they hug, then kissing each other’s lips when Tobin pulls back a little.

Christen cups her face when they part, “Thank you for waking me up before you leave.”

_ I wouldn’t want to wake up alone if the roles were reversed, _ Tobin tells her. _ But you can sleep some more if you want. When you decide to get up, your granola and water bottle are on my nightstand. _

Christen turns to look at the bedside table, “You filled it up?”

Tobin shrugs as if to say ‘it’s no big deal’ then tells her, _ There’s hot coffee in the kitchen. _

That seems to be a magic phrase because Christen pulls her down for another kiss and a long drawn out hug before finally letting go.

“Drive safe,” Christen entreats. “I’ll see you next time you get off work early?”

Tobin nods.

Then Christen adds, “Otherwise, I’ll see you—”

_ Saturday night? _

“Okay, yes, Saturday night.”

Tobin beams, _ Hope your therapy goes well. _ Then she grabs another kiss.

*

And, oh, how she wishes she could grab another kiss when she’s back in her room that night.

[Tobin]  
_ Thank you, thank you for   
_ _ making the bed!!!  
_ _ I felt like I walked in my own  
_ _ hotel room!!! :D :D :D _

[Christen]  
_ :D :D :D  
_ _ You’re welcome :)  
_ _ Something’s missing though  
_ _ I can’t quite put my finger on it _

[Tobin]  
_ I can put my finger on it ;) _

[Christen]  
_ Hahahahahaha  
_ _ Promise? ;) _

[Tobin]  
_ I’ll try to make the bed just   
_ _ like this in case I can put my   
_ _ finger on it tomorrow ;) _

*

Both are thankful they only have to wait until Thursday, instead of Saturday, to spend another night together.

Christen picks up Tobin at the hub around 5pm. Tobin drives them home. (Lauren spends time with Jrue.) Christen cooks and, this time, Tobin helps. Then they eat dinner on the couch, which reminds them about buying a dining table.

So when Tobin is done washing the dishes and goes to her room, it doesn’t surprise her to find Christen sitting at her desk, writing on what looks like a journal or a diary, then turning to her, asking,_ Can you please check with Lauren… if buying a table next Sunday… works for her? _

_ Why not this Sunday? _ Tobin asks.

_ You have a six-day… work week this week. You need to… chill. _

_ By chill, you mean—? _

_ Take it easy? _

_ Oh, good! _ Tobin grins. _ I don’t want to hard chill on Sunday. _

Christen rolls her eyes but smiles, _ Why are you so far away? _

_ I didn’t want to intrude, _ Tobin points at the journal or diary on her desk, which makes Christen glance.

“Oh.” _ It’s just my daily… planner, _ she tells Tobin before holding out her arm and wiggling her fingers, inviting Tobin to come closer.

Tobin does and puts her left arm around Christen’s shoulders while Christen puts her right arm around Tobin’s lower back, with her hand on Tobin’s waist.

Then Tobin points at the planner with a questioning look.

And Christen nods.

So Tobin takes a closer look at the open spread, which contains all the days of the week from Monday to Sunday, with their corresponding dates, with each day occupying a quarter of the page plus a blank one for additional notes, and with each quarter page lined with 30-minute intervals from 8am to 5pm.

Tobin realizes it’s for next week and gives Christen a goofy smile.

“What?”

_ I was just checking if you pencil in sex. _

“Tobin!” Christen swats her on the stomach as Tobin laughs. “I do not schedule sex.”

_ But you pencil me in, _ Tobin teases.

“What makes you say that?”

Tobin points at Monday, which has meditate, breakfast, a big blank before lunch, therapy, and grocery with a question mark; then at Tuesday, with a blank between 9am to 11am; then at Sunday, which has meditate, breakfast, yoga, church, lunch; and finally, at the 4pm-onward slots from Tuesday to Thursday and Saturday.

_ These are highlighted in orange, which is my favorite color, unlike your other free periods highlighted in green, which is your favorite color, _ Tobin grins. _ I’m orange. _

Christen can’t help but smile, “Very astute… But Tobin,” her expression turns serious just as quickly, “do you feel like you’re just… a booty call?”

_ No. No, sweetheart, I don’t. I’m sorry. I was just teasing. _

Christen looks relieved.

_ Do you feel like you’re just a booty call? _ Tobin asks. _ And free dinner. _

Christen laughs then shakes her head, “No.”

Tobin smiles, _ So we’re grocery shopping on Monday? _

“If you want to…” 

Tobin nods comically before adding, _ And we’re sticking with the booty calls? _

Christen rolls her eyes again, “You’re insatiable.”

_ Like you aren’t. _

“Touché.”

*

Just like that, they establish a new routine.

Christen sleeps over at Tobin’s on Saturdays and Sundays and goes home Monday nights. Then she sleeps over again if Tobin gets off work early on Tuesdays to Thursdays (both knowing it won’t happen on Fridays.)

Lauren welcomes this new development since she wants to spend more time with Jrue and doesn’t want to leave Tobin all by herself in their apartment.

She happily goes on dates with Jrue on Saturdays while Tobin and Christen freely express their feelings (of pleasure) as loud as they want.

They all meet up for church and lunch on Sundays. And sometimes they do touristy stuff in the afternoon. And sometimes they don’t.

After their first group shopping trip to buy a dining set (for four), Tobin and Jrue agree to bring their handheld game consoles next time and leave the shopping to Lauren and Christen.

They go their separate ways after that and Tobin and Christen make the most of their alone time before Lauren gets home.

Christen moves her therapy on Mondays from early afternoon to late morning, initially thinking it makes more sense to be in therapy while Tobin is writing her assigned article instead of leaving her in the afternoon when she’s almost done. But Tobin has other ideas.

She starts her assigned article in the morning then continues writing after (insisting on) driving Christen to the clinic, sitting in the corner of the room while Christen goes through her exercises and treatment.

Christen can't stop smiling the whole session. She doesn’t even flinch like she used to.

And once they’re back in the car and Tobin gets in the driver’s seat, Christen asks, _ Would you like to start on your ACL article… once we’re back at the apartment? _

Tobin beams, _ Really? _

_ Be sure to include my theory that… incredible sex with an incredible person helps to… reduce pain somehow, _ Christen smirks.

_ That’s an excellent theory, _ Tobin smirks back. _ Wanna test it when we get back? _

_ I’m all for gathering considerable… empirical… evidence to support my theory. _

They both start giggling before lunging at each other and kissing like there’s no tomorrow.

(Of course, tomorrow still comes. And Tuesday is still their favorite day of the week.)

*

It’s the unexpected things that add more flavor to their routine as the days turn into weeks… 

...like Christen’s ever-changing contact name on Tobin’s phone, a few spur-of-the-moment activities, and countless random text messages.

[Tobin]  
_ Do you like Zen juice? _

[Christen]  
_ I do _

[Tobin]  
_ I thought you might :) _

*

[Christen]  
_ I just rewatched that vid of   
_ _ Ronaldinho you love so much :)  
_ _ I still don’t get why you’re an   
_ _ Arsenal fan when you could be   
_ _ a Barça fan _

[Tobin]  
_ I am a barca fan _

[Christen]  
_ Of course you are  
_ _ I forgive you  
_ _ I still don’t get why you’re not   
_ _ a women’s soccer fan _

[Tobin]  
_ Can you do that trick of   
_ _ Ronaldinho’s? _

[Christen]  
_ Excuse me? What are you   
_ _ trying to imply?  
_ _ I can hit the crossbar and the   
_ _ goal posts just fine  
_ _ Many times  
_ _ Much to my chagrin lol _

[Tobin]  
_ Lol ( *3* ) _

*

[Tobin]  
_ I’m on episode 6 of Glee  
_ _ I still don’t get why you’re a   
_ _ Finchel fan _

[Christen]  
_ They’re endgame!!! _

[Tobin]  
_ Eww _

[Christen]  
_ Stop watching then _

[Tobin]  
_ But you get excited when I   
_ _ watch  
_ _ Also, Santana is hot  
_ _ *  
_ _ Chris?  
_ _ *  
_ _ Christen?  
_ _ *  
_ _ Babe you’re way hotter than  
_ _ Santana _

[Christen]  
_ Hmph _

*

[Tobin]  
_ Look at this cute little doggy   
_ _ in a shirt! _

[Christen]  
_ *heart eyes* _

*

[Tobin]  
_ Wanna try indoor rock climbing   
_ _ with me when your knee is   
_ _ better? :) _

[Christen]  
_ Okay :) _

*

[Tobin]  
_ One of my regulars just gave   
_ _ me this delicious cupcake   
_ _ which I bet you love _

[Christen]  
_ Where is it from? _

[Tobin]  
_ Magnolia bakery _

[Christen]  
_ Yes I love those!  
_ _ I’ll bring you some tomorrow :) _

*

[Tobin]  
_ There’s a new Nike billboard   
_ _ on my route  
_ _ Got so excited I can’t wait to see   
_ _ you on your own billboard in the   
_ _ near future!!! :D _

[Christen]  
_ You have no idea what that   
_ _ does to my confidence :* :* :* _

*

[Christen]  
_ I’m so bummed _

[Tobin]  
_ Why? _

[Christen]  
_ There’s this one-time special   
_ _ yoga class I want to join but it’s   
_ _ only for pairs and Channing   
_ _ can’t come with :( _

[Tobin]  
_ I’ll come with :)  
_ _ When is it? _

[Christen]  
_ Babe you don’t like yoga _

[Tobin]  
_ But I like you ;)  
_ _ *  
_ _ So have I still got it or have I   
_ _ still got it? :D _

[Christen]  
_ You still got it :D  
_ _ *heart eyes* _

*

[Tobin]  
_ I remembered to put on   
_ _ sunscreen today like you   
_ _ said :) _

[Christen]  
_ Thank you :* :* :* _

*

[Christen]  
_ Wish you were here with me _

[Tobin]  
_ Therapy okay? _

[Christen]  
_ Yes it is  
_ _ There’s no reason to worry   
_ _ sweetheart  
_ _ I just wish you were here :* _

*

[Tobin]  
_ I miss you so much _

[Christen]  
_ I miss you so much _

*

[Christen]  
_ Got you this snapback :) _

[Tobin]  
_ Chris!!!  
_ _ It’s Supreme!!!! _

[Christen]  
_ Don’t like it? _

[Tobin]  
_ Honey I love it!!!! _

Tobin’s thumbs hover above the keyboard of her phone. She’s breathing heavily and her heart is beating so fast it’s noticeable through her shirt.

She’s sitting on the couch with Lauren, who puts a hand on her shoulder.

_ Tobin, are you okay? _

Tobin nods, looking quite overwhelmed.

[Tobin]  
_ Thank you!!!! ( *3* )  
_ _ *heart eyes* *heart eyes* *heart eyes* _

_ Hey, _ Lauren waves at her, _ you’re scaring me. Is everything okay? _

Tobin looks at her and nods again. And seconds pass by before she asks, _ Have you told Jrue you love him? _

A big smile slowly appears on Lauren’s face, _ No, I haven’t. Have you told Christen? _

_ No, I haven’t. _

_ We should get our heads out of our asses soon. _

Tobin laughs, _ Yes, we should… Easier said than done though. _

_ Tell me about it. _

*

Tobin runs towards Christen’s car in the parking lot outside the hub in excitement.

And as soon as she could, she kisses Christen so fiercely, deeply, feverishly… that it makes Christen look like she has really melted into a puddle.

_ Hi, _ Tobin smiles.

“Hi,” Christen smiles back, still in a daze. “Missed me that much?”

Tobin vehemently nods her head yes, _ And I’ve got incredible news. _

“What?” Christen’s smile grows bigger.

_ ShipX is celebrating its first year anniversary on October 24. _

_ Wow, that’s in a few weeks. Congratulations! _

Tobin nods again and beams, _ They’ve asked me to write an op-ed about the company and our kickass women. _ Then she stops and giggles, _ For the LA Times! _

Christen squeals and kisses Tobin in a frenzy, _ Oh, my gosh, baby. Are you excited? _

_ Heck, yeah, I’m excited! _

_ You’re going to do so great, I just know it! _

Tobin’s adoring gaze is so overwhelming for both of them that Tobin starts breathing heavily again and Christen briefly covers Tobin’s eyes with her hand. 

Before Tobin can sign anything, Christen grins, “This calls for a celebration, don’t you think?” 

Tobin nods before they kiss each other harder than before.

Then they hurry back to an empty apartment, eager to celebrate.

*

_ Do you think this will taste nearly as good as real champagne? _ Tobin asks after pointing at a bottle of Sutter Home Fre Brut Non-alcoholic Sparkling Wine on the shelf when they’re out grocery shopping again.

Christen looks puzzled but humors Tobin by picking it up and reading the label then putting it back, _ It’s a California wine so, technically… it can’t ever be like real champagne. For me, the only other drink that tastes exactly like champagne… is a Vouvray. _

_ Is this worth a try based on the description? _

Christen shrugs and nods, smiling a little, still puzzled.

_ And what kind of cheese do you think will go with this? _

Christen smiles bigger in amusement and places a bottle in their cart before leading Tobin to the deli section.  
*  
When they stop at a red light, Christen can’t help but comment, _ We’re not going back to the apartment yet, are we? _

Tobin grins and nods.  
*  
Christen sits unmoving in the passenger seat with her mouth agape when they reach Manhattan Beach.

And as soon as they find a parking spot, Christen asks, _ Want to tell me now what you’re up to? _

_ I was drawn to the wine section earlier for some reason, _ Tobin starts to explain. _ And I realized that the timing is right so I thought maybe we could watch the sunset together— _

_ —at the beach, with champagne and cheese— _

_ —and crackers, _ Tobin grins adorably.

Christen mirrors her grin, _ Do you remember me having a back-up plan for our second date? _

_ No way. _

Christen giggles, _ Yes way. _

_ This was it? _

Christen nods happily, smiling so bright, _ I was so sure you’d enjoy a champagne picnic at the beach to watch the sunset. _

_ And you’re so right, _ Tobin smiles back before leaning in for a kiss.  
*  
They can’t stop smiling as Christen lays down the beach towel they just bought on the sand and Tobin puts the small cooler Christen always has in her car (now, with ice) and the bag of wine, cups, cheese, and crackers down on the towel.

They can’t stop smiling as they sit side by side.

They can’t stop smiling as Christen signs, _ Sweetheart. _

_ Yes, sweetheart. _

_ For the record, this is my ideal date. _

They can’t stop smiling as they kiss.  
*  
It’s that moment when half the sun is below the horizon that Tobin loves so much and she is in awe.

They’ve changed sitting positions and Tobin is now sitting behind Christen, who is sitting between Tobin’s legs and leaning back against Tobin, whose arms are around Christen’s waist with her legs folded up.

Spurred on by the wonderful view, Tobin tightens her hold and gives Christen’s shoulder a gentle kiss.

Christen instinctively sweeps her hair to one side, exposing her nape.

And Tobin smirks, placing more kisses there… 

But after a while, Christen taps her on the shoulder, telling her, _ Baby, you’re missing the sunset. _

The sun does seem to be setting faster than before when Tobin looks back at the horizon, kissing the back of Christen’s ear.

Then it’s like the sky exploded in orange and Tobin can’t help but gasp.

She can’t help but take out her phone either, in a rush to take photos.

She leans further back, away from Christen, then toys with the area of focus, and takes a couple of shots before Christen’s head turns, with a soft smile and a tender gaze on her face, and it’s just… perfect… 

Tobin manages to take a couple more shots.

And she’s grinning from ear to ear when Christen asks, _ May I see? _

They take a look at the photos together and it makes Christen smile.

She turns to Tobin and asks, _ Can you please send them to me? _

Tobin nods and smirks as she selects the photos… clicks on the share button then Message, and types c-u in the contact name. And out pops, _ ‘Cunning Linguist.’ _

“Tobin!” Christen smacks her thigh.

And Tobin bursts into raucous laughter, completely expecting Christen’s reaction.

“Change it,” Christen whines.

Tobin bobs her head playfully as if saying, ‘Okay, okay,’ before hitting send and going to Contacts to edit Christen’s name.

She glances at Christen, who doesn’t seem to be over it and grumbles, “So crude…” 

Tobin chuckles then types, _ ‘Can… speak… English… Spanish… Sign… and… Tobin.’ _

Christen snorts and gives in to laughter.

Tobin smirks again and raises an eyebrow before shaking her head with a questioning look, asking, _ No? _

Christen simply gives her an amused smile.

So Tobin deletes the whole thing and types, _ ‘Can… I be… your… girlfriend?’ _

And Christen stills.

It takes a moment before she turns her body towards Tobin, cups Tobin’s face with both hands, caresses Tobin’s cheek with her thumbs, and kisses her with a tenderness that Tobin hasn’t felt before… 

When she pulls away, she scans Tobin’s face before she signs, _ You were asking me, right? _

Tobin nods, breathing heavily.

_ Then please believe me when I say that my first instinct was to say yes. _

Tobin freezes for a second then asks, _ But? _

_ You need to know that my job takes me away from LA for most of the year… No matter where it is, no matter where I play, it will always be far away from here… far away from you. _

_ Where exactly is your job? _

_ I don’t know anymore, Tobin. _

Tobin doesn’t respond and just looks at Christen like she’s waiting for further explanation.

Christen starts fidgeting but succumbs to Tobin’s stare, _ My recent contract has ended. I have the option to renew but… before I got injured, US Soccer mentioned that they have plans for me… And now… now, I honestly don’t know where I stand… Will I still be employed once I’ve recovered? By whom? Will I still be able to play? And if I get to play again— _

_ When, _ Tobin tells her. _ When you get to play again. _

Christen softens a little. She takes Tobin’s left hand and kisses it before taking a deep breath, _ I’m often a victim of my own thoughts, Tobin. _

_ And your thoughts have led you to believe we won’t make it? _

_ I feel like nothing is in my control. Not my thoughts, not my feelings, not my recovery, not my job, not my future… And it frustrates me that I’m right back where I started two years ago… with a whole lot of uncertainty. _

_ Can’t I be your first new certainty? _

_ The scary part is that it feels like you already are. _

_ What’s so scary about that? _

_ What happens when we’re out of this bubble we’ve created? _

_ We’ll never know until we try. _

Christen’s eyes start welling up, _ I’m sorry, sweetheart, I’m spiraling. Will you meditate with me? _

Tobin immediately nods and wraps her arms around Christen.

_ I’ll need to silently tell myself all my fears right now and accept them, _ Christen tells her. _ Then I’ll need to do something I typically do. _

_ Like kiss me? _

Christen can’t help but chuckle, _ Yes, exactly. _

Tobin gives her a soft smile, _ Anything you need. _

Christen nods and smiles back softly in appreciation as she faces the ocean again, sitting cross-legged and straightening her back.

Tobin taps her on the shoulder, _ Honey, what do I do? _

_ Stay close? _

Tobin nods.

_ And as long as you’re comfortable in your current position and find it stable… you can try closing your eyes and focusing on your breathing for a few minutes. _

Tobin nods again.

And Christen closes her eyes.

For a while, Tobin simply focuses on Christen… but her thoughts also seem to get the better of her, so she decides to follow Christen’s lead, closing her eyes and focusing on her breathing… 

Minutes later, when she feels Christen moving, she opens her eyes and finds Christen gazing back at her with great affection. 

She runs her fingers along Tobin’s hairline, cups Tobin’s face with both hands, with her eyes scanning Tobin’s features again as if memorizing them, and leans in slowly for a kiss… that’s tender… and gentle and… loving… 

When they stop, Christen takes another moment to study Tobin’s face again before signing, _ I’m sorry… I would love to say yes… but I can’t… not yet. _

Tobin nods solemnly, _ I’ll take whatever you can give me… I wouldn’t trade this for the world. _

*

The question changes nothing and everything.

They still go about their weekly routine. They still kiss and hug and make love. 

But they kiss more often and make love more often. And they hold each other tighter and touch at all times.

Tobin starts joining Christen for meditation in the morning when they wake up on Sundays and Mondays. And Christen starts bringing Tobin for dinner at the Presses’ as often as they can manage. 

In the evenings when Christen sleeps over, Tobin sits on her desk chair and makes Christen sit on her lap as Christen checks off her to-do list to feel like she has accomplished something for the day. 

Then Tobin adds more line items that Christen has done that day for Christen to check off, like: _ Pick up Tobin *heart* *heart,* Cook yummy dinner, Make hummus for Tobin, Bring Tobin to (name of new place), Kiss Tobin senseless… _She grins at Christen, looking incredibly pleased with herself, and Christen can’t resist… kissing her senseless… then checking it off.

*

Just when they wish time would slow down, it flies by faster.

They feel it when Tobin’s deadline comes and she submits her op-ed to the editor of the LA Times after working on it for weeks with the help of friends, ShipX bosses and coworkers. They feel it when Tobin needs to make two revisions in the next 36 hours. They feel it when it gets published on the Monday after ShipX’s first anniversary and they rush to buy copies of the newspaper (to keep for posterity and send to Tobin’s family) and celebrate all week.

They also feel it when Christen starts training outdoors more and more, doing soccer drills she has been cleared to do, and picking up Tobin at later times than she used to. They don’t want to admit it but they also feel it every time Christen shuts down all of Tobin’s attempts to make Christen stop driving to the hub after her training on the days that Tobin gets off work early.

They also feel it when they realize that Thanksgiving is fast approaching.

*

_ I’ll need to do overtime on my rest days after Black Friday, _ Tobin tells Christen with a sigh after greeting her with a kiss in the parking lot. _ They’ve just given us our holiday schedules. _

_ How bad is it? _ Christen asks.

_ Starting week of Thanksgiving, 12 days straight, then one rest day, then six days straight and two rest days, then 12 days straight again before going back to regular programming just in time for your birthday. _

“Gosh.”

_ We can note it all down on your planner later. _

_ Yes, let’s do that. It’ll help me and Lauren come up with a recovery plan for you. _

Tobin laughs, signing okay before kissing Christen again.

_ Would you like to skip Thanksgiving dinner at my house so you can rest? _ Christen asks.

_ No, I don’t want to do that. Lauren and I are looking forward to it, _ Tobin admits. _ And besides, Lauren will be the one driving. _

_ Okay, well, would you like to skip my dad’s birthday dinner? _

_ I’ll come in late for sure but I feel like big daddy’s birthday is more of a must than Thanksgiving, to be honest. _

Christen smiles and gives her a kiss, _ I’ll let them know about your work schedule. Then we’ll play it by ear, okay? _

Tobin beams, then nods and gives Christen another kiss.

*

The Press family Thanksgiving dinner is a much simpler affair than Tyler’s engagement party, consisting only of extended family, plus Tobin and Lauren, who get a glimpse of the Press family silliness when they start playing games before Tobin and Lauren need to leave.

_ I really like their house, _ Lauren tells Tobin. _ Even if it’s huge, it feels really lived in. _

_ You’re right, it does, _ Tobin agrees.

_ I can’t believe you haven’t been inside Christen’s room. _

_ Shut up. _

*

On Black Friday, Tobin gets a taste of what it’ll be like in the coming days.

[Tobin]  
_ Honey I’m finally home  
_ _ 107 packages delivered today  
_ _ *Shaka emoji* _

[Christen]  
_ Oh honey I’m so sorry  
_ _ How are you feeling? _

[Tobin]  
_ Dreading tomorrow _

[Christen]  
_ Please don’t feel obligated to   
_ _ come tomorrow, okay? My   
_ _ family will understand _

[Tobin]  
_ Thank you sweetheart   
_ _ We’ll see how I feel tomorrow _

*

The next day, she feels the full effect of Black Friday, delivering 150 packages, getting into traffic jams, and arriving at the Presses’ around 10pm for Cody’s birthday. 

The whole extended family is still there. The food is great. But that’s as far as Tobin can remember because next thing she knows, her eyes are closed, she’s lying on a bed, and she feels Christen’s kisses on her face and Christen’s hand on her arm.

When she opens her eyes, the first thing she sees is Christen’s face.

“Babe, it’s 5am,” Christen says.

And Tobin immediately gets up.

The next thing she sees is the unfamiliar room. She looks around and there’s no doubt in her mind whose room she’s in based on how neat and organized everything is.

_ This isn’t how I pictured waking up in your room for the first time, _ Tobin confesses.

Christen laughs, _ That makes two of us. _

_ Wanna rectify that? _

“Tobin,” Christen tries keeping a stern look. “No.”

_ Tobin, yes. _

Christen snorts.

And she can’t help but give Tobin a deeply satisfying kiss… that draws a goofy grin from Tobin’s face.

“Come on. Get up. Or we’ll be late.”

Tobin starts pouting, _ Wait. We? _

_ I’ll drive you to your apartment so you can change into your uniform then I’ll drive you to work. _

Tobin pouts. _ But— _

_ No buts. _

_ Yes, but. Your butt. _

Christen snorts again, “Tobin!”

_ Come on, baby. I’m in your room! _

“No. Go shower.”

_ We’ll only get to see each other again after one week. _

“No.”

Tobin pouts all the way to work. And her day ends with a frown. 

*

By the end of her gruelling 12-day work shift, Tobin is exhausted and scowling.

*

The next day, on her only day off, she sleeps almost the whole day then goes to the Presses’ for a Sunday family dinner.

When Christen opens the door, she looks taken aback and immediately engulfs Tobin in a really, really, really, really long hug.

_ I look that bad? _ Tobin asks.

_ You look worn out, sweetheart, _ Christen tells her then smiles. _ Still very pretty though. _

Tobin smiles sheepishly.

_ I miss you so much, _ Christen gives Tobin a quick kiss.

_ I miss you so much, _ Tobin gives Christen a longer kiss.

_ For the record, I regret not putting out. _

Tobin laughs.

Christen playfully smacks her arm, _ Not for my own pleasure, you dork. _

_ Then for what? _ Tobin smirks.

_ I don’t know… Is it silly to think that you might have smiled a bit more throughout the week and not look this… drained… had I… caved? _

_ You do realize you’re giving me ammunition for future use? _

_ I feel so guilty. I could’ve made you feel better. _

_ There’s always make-up sex, _ Tobin waggles her brows.

Christen laughs then kisses Tobin again before dragging her inside.

It doesn’t escape Tobin’s notice that she’s there along with Tyler’s fiancé and Channing’s boyfriend.

She takes her phone out, with her text-to-speech app ready, when they start talking about their holiday plans for the remainder of the year while Christen helps Stacy with dinner.

“We’re thinking somewhere near, like, maybe, Lake Tahoe,” Tyler says, “since we’re all traveling far next year—oh, that reminds me, Tobin.”

Tobin offers her a questioning look.

“Are you joining us in Sweden?” Tyler asks.

Tobin tries not to act surprised by this as she types on her app to ask, _ When? _

“Most likely in April. For mom’s birthday.”

Tobin nods once and types again, _ What’s… in… Sweden? _

“Uh, Christen?” Tyler says, before suddenly turning to Christen, who appears behind her. “I was asking Tobin if she can join us in Sweden next year.”

The color instantly drains from Christen’s face as she glances at Tobin before saying, “We haven’t talked about that, Ty.”

The sisters exchange a look that doesn’t sit well with Tobin. And her heart starts hammering in her chest.

Christen turns to her and signs, _ Sweetheart, I can explain. _

Tobin signs back. _ Let’s just… enjoy dinner.  
_ *  
Cody manages to catch her eye at one point, “Want more jambalaya, Tobin?”

Tobin nods and Christen readily takes the dish from him.

Tobin signs thanks to Cody before spooning more food onto her plate.  
*  
Sometime later, Christen taps her arm, _ Mom wants— _

Tobin immediately turns to Stacy.

“How do you like the food?” Stacy asks.

Tobin offers her a tight-lipped smile before grabbing her phone to say, _ Delicious… as… usual… Stacy… Thank… you.  
_ *  
When dinner ends, she addresses Cody and Stacy again with her app, _ I’m… sorry… I can’t… stay… long. _

“Don’t worry about it,” Cody hugs her. “See you next time, buddy.”

Stacy hugs her, too, “You’ve got to eat more.”

Tobin nods, then waves at the sisters and swiftly heads for the door. 

Christen is hot on her heels and catches hold of her when they reach the foyer, _ Hey, let me drive you. _

_ My Uber is arriving. _

“Tobin—”

Tobin doesn’t wait to see what Christen has to say and proceeds with opening the door.

Christen catches her again at the doorstep, _ Tobin, please talk to me. _

_ Is T-y-r--whatever in Sweden? _ Tobin asks.

And Christen freezes for a split-second then holds back her tears, _ Yes. _

Tobin’s jaw clenches as she shakes her head in disbelief and takes a deep breath.

Christen tries to catch her eye, _ But, sweetheart, I haven’t— _

Tobin notices a car pulling over in front of the house. And it’s her ride.

Her gaze is piercing as she turns to Christen again.

“Tobin,” Christen gives her a pleading look.

She gives Christen a lingering kiss on the temple… then walks away.  
*  
She doesn’t know how long she’s been sitting there, near the Manhattan Beach Pier, slumped on the sand, barefoot, before she receives a text that’s not from Christen.

[Lauren]  
_ Please come home   
_ _ Or Christen will start combing   
_ _ all the beaches in LA _

[Tobin]  
_Please tell her to go home_  
*  
When Tobin gets home, Christen’s car is parked out front and she can only grumble.

She drags her feet to her apartment and stalls at the front door.

When she finally walks inside, she sees Christen sitting on the couch, with a guilt-stricken look in her eyes, and her anger flares up again.

She goes straight to her room in a huff, without so much as giving Christen a nod.

Every move she makes is heavy and forceful, from every step she takes, to opening her bedroom door, to closing it, to removing her shoes, to dropping her keys down on her desk, to opening her closet.

She grabs a pair of shorts and a t-shirt and throws them on her bed and sees Christen standing on the other side, looking down and chastising herself, “Get it together, Christen.”

Their gazes meet.

And Christen immediately says, “Tobin, I’m so sorry.”

Tobin stops Christen from saying anything more by putting her hands up, with her palms facing Christen, and closing her eyes.

Then she lets out a long sigh of misery before opening her eyes again, _ I’m so mad at you. _

She looks at Christen long enough to see her sign, _ You have every reason to be. _

But after that, she keeps her gaze downcast, not wanting to see what Christen has to say yet but, at the same time, wanting to know that she’s still there.

_ I looked like a fool not knowing anything about Sweden… But then I thought… it’s so much worse than that! Were you planning on not telling me at all? Or telling me just before you leave? I mean, when you said you worked far away from here, I immediately thought Jersey or New York or Boston. I know how far away those are. But Sweden?! _

Christen almost takes a step forward but wavers as Tobin continues her rant.

_ I can only imagine how far away Sweden is… It kind of makes sense now why you didn’t say yes. But couldn’t you have—I don’t know—outright told me no? _

Christen takes two quick steps closer to the bed.

_ A no would have been better than this. At least I could’ve told you I still wanted to make the most of my time with you. Like I had a choice. Like I mattered enough to be given a direct answer. _

Christen starts walking slowly to her right… 

_ You mean so much to me that I want to take all my chances just to be with you. Because what is it you always say in sports? You miss a hundred percent of the shots you don’t take? So what am I to you? _

Christen reaches the corner of the bed.

_ I’m not even worth telling that you play in Sweden. Am I really that unimportant to you? Am I really just… a temporary thing… someone you can just… bide your time with while you wait to go back to your actual life? _

Christen rounds the other corner… 

_ I feel like a fool… I thought we have something really great going… something truly special… I thought you felt the same way about me the way I felt about you. _

…and she tentatively takes the few steps left towards Tobin.

_ I could’ve done anything you asked… I would’ve done anything you asked… even if it hurt, I would have agreed to it. _

Christen stops a foot away.

_ This hurts so much more, _ Tobin looks up.

And Christen is sobbing, _ I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. _

Tobin starts blinking away her tears.

_ I didn’t think it would get to this, _ Christen confesses. _ I didn’t mean to hurt you. I wanted to tell you. I was just waiting for the right time. _

A few tears escape from Tobin’s eyes and start to roll down her cheeks.

_ I’m sorry I didn’t want to think about my unsettled future to begin with… My mind was already racing every night ever since I got injured. _

Tobin carelessly wipes her tears away.

_ And you’ve made me feel so good… like all my worries seem to melt away when I’m with you, that I… I started fearing about the future more… On one hand, I can’t bear to think about not being able to fully recover and play again… On the other hand, once I do recover… once I start playing again… it’ll mean I’ll be away from you or worse, I won’t be with you at all. And I can’t bear to think about that either. _

Tobin starts to sniffle.

_ I didn’t say yes for the same reason I didn’t tell you about Sweden or any other city I could possibly work in. I didn’t know what’s next… and I really wanted you to know exactly what you’re getting yourself into if… if you’ll still have me… _

The tears fall down faster…

_ How could I manage that if I didn’t know… if I didn’t know what’s next? Tyresö called earlier this week… I haven’t signed… but my family… my family assumed I’ll renew my contract… because… because US Soccer hasn’t called yet… and I’m holding off… my decision… because I really, _ Christen’s shoulders shake as she sobs, _ I was really hoping… they’d call… and I’d finally… make it… to a team… stateside again… so I can… be closer… to you… _

_ You couldn’t tell me… all of this earlier… and save us both… from this heartache? _ Tobin signs through her tears.

_ I know… I could have… I’m so… sorry, _ Christen can’t help but let her forehead drop onto Tobin’s shoulder, signing, _ I’m sorry… I’m sorry… I’m sorry… _

Tobin can’t help but wrap both arms around her, which just makes Christen sob even harder.

She clings to Tobin until her sobs turn into hiccups… and Tobin lets go.

Christen braves looking up and is surprised to see so much emotion in Tobin’s eyes.

_ What now? _ Tobin asks.

_ I want to be with you. _

_ For how long? _

_ For as long as you’ll have me. _

_ Is that really what you want? _

_ “Tobin, I love you.” _

Tobin holds her breath, _ You do? _

Christen looks like she’s about to start crying again, _ If you don’t feel it… please let me… please let me work on making you feel that I do everyday. _

_ You really love me? _

_ “I’m in love with you, Tobin.” _

A soft smile starts to form on Tobin’s weepy face as she places a letter C over her heart and taps it twice.

“Is that…” _ Is that my new name sign? _ Christen asks.

Tobin beams as she nods.

Christen starts breathing heavily, _ And it stands for Chris? _

Tobin nods again.

_ Does… does that mean… I’m in your heart? _

Tobin shakes her head, _ No. _

_ No? _

Tobin grins wide and brings her other hand to meet the letter C and form a heart.

Christen laughs and cries, _ You’re such a dork. _

_ Your dork. _

Christen beams with tears of joy in her eyes, _ My dork. _

_ I love you, Chris. _

Christen does her best to stop herself from crying, _ You do? _

_ If you don’t feel it, then please let me— _

_ Shut up. _

Tobin laughs and they’re wrapped in each other’s arms in an instant.

And they kiss whatever spot they can kiss as they hold each other tight.

Then they gaze into each other’s eyes for a moment before Tobin signs again.

_ I’m sorry I got mad and made you cry. _

_ I’m sorry I didn’t tell you what I was going through and hurt you. _

_ You really love me? _

Christen nods emphatically.

_ And you’re really in love with me? _

Christen nods again, _ I think I’ve been in love with you since you showed up that night with a Fragile sticker on your chest. _

Tobin smiles, _ It really is, you know. _

Christen gives her a questioning look.

_ Fragile. _

_ Your heart? _

Tobin nods.

_ I’ll handle it with care, my love. _

Tobin is beside herself with joy, _ Did you just give me a delivery pun? _

_ I guess I did, _Christen giggles.

Tobin giggles along with her, _ I’ve wanted to call you that. _

_ What? _

_ My love. _

Christen beams, _ Yes, my love. _

Tobin beams back, _ Wanna keep loving me? _

_I do, _Christen nods earnestly. _ Tobin, loving you is the best unplanned thing I’ve ever done._


	5. There there

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was supposed to end at a much later point in the future. But this part turned out way longer than I expected and now I have to add another chapter. Most things just don't turn out the way you planned. It's true in life as well as fics. Thank you to lucianafromnaples for being my sounding board (she can claim this fic as her own even if the words and the story are all mine). Thank you to Heath17_KO5 for regularly checking my progress after her kid has gone to school (I really appreciate it, my friend. It always feels encouraging without being pressuring). Most of all, thanks to YOU, for reading, for leaving a kudos, for commenting. This has been an incredible ride so far and you've been a huge part of it. It's the happiest I've ever felt writing a fic (especially during the times when I couldn't find the words and then suddenly thought of something inspiring). I hope you still enjoy reading this. I'm sorry I got all sentimental LOL

  
  


_ Will you still love me if you go back to Sweden? _ Tobin asks.

_ I will still love you wherever I will be, _ Christen vows.  _ Will you still love me if I go back to Sweden? _

_ Sweetheart, I love you to the moon and back, so… Sweden, _ Tobin places her hand (palm down) below her waist, then signs,  _ Moon, _ and raises her hand high above her head, standing on tiptoe and smirking.

Christen tries to stop herself from grinning,  _ Baby, be serious. _

_ I am, _ Tobin’s smile turns softer.  _ I will still love you wherever you and I will be. _

Christen smiles just as softly,  _ It won’t be easy. _

_ Nothing worth having comes easy. _

_ Loving you comes easy. _

_ We both come easy. _

_ Speak for yourself. _

Tobin stops to think for a second,  _ Yeah, that’s true. _

Christen laughs and throws her arms around Tobin’s shoulders, holding on tight and nuzzling her face into Tobin’s neck. Tobin relaxes in her arms and wraps both arms around her back, holding her just as tight. And they stand there, breathing each other in, with their eyes closed and their hearts full… and open… 

Tobin waits for Christen to let go… And when she does, Christen cups Tobin’s face with one hand and looks at her with eyes still full of guilt and self-reproach.

“I’m so sorry for what I did and didn’t do.”

_ Will you tell me everything I need to know from now on? _

Christen nods,  _ I will. Will you do the same? _

_ I will. Will you tell me about your job, like, from the start? _

_ Can I tell you on your rest days so that we’ll have more time? _

Tobin nods,  _ Thank you for telling me what you could earlier, when you clearly weren’t ready. _

_ I was more scared of losing you—I don’t want to lose you. _

_ You’re not going to lose me, _ Tobin kisses both of Christen’s hands…  _ I have tracking. _

Christen snorts then shakes her head as she sighs, “I’m in love with a dork.”

Tobin grins and wraps her arms around Christen again.

Christen grins back and wraps her arms around Tobin again, looking absolutely smitten as she says, “I’m so in love with you, dork…”

Tobin sports her dorkiest grin, looking equally smitten as she leans in for a kiss… that Christen returns eagerly… happily… reverently… until they part and… Tobin yawns.

_ Sleep? _ Christen giggles.

Tobin looks hopeful as she asks,  _ Make-up sex? _

Christen looks amused,  _ You’ll fall asleep touching my boob. _

Tobin pouts then narrows her eyes,  _ Heavy make-out session? _

_ Naked cuddling. _

_ With boob-touching? _

_ Just touching, no fondling. _

_ Sold!  _ Tobin grins even wider.

And Christen looks like she falls in love just a little bit more.

*

The feeling of Christen kissing her cheek then shaking her gently before moving off her body rouses Tobin from sleep.

When Tobin opens her eyes, Christen is reaching for her phone on the nightstand, tapping it once, before turning to Tobin again.

Tobin opens her arms, asking for a hug, and Christen leans down to hold Tobin for a moment before sitting up and pulling Tobin along with her. 

Tobin goes for another hug as they sit. But a little while later, Christen gives her another squeeze before letting her go and gently pushing her off the bed.

With her head hanging low, Tobin slowly gets out of bed… drags her feet to her bedroom door… takes her towel off the hook and lazily wraps it around her body.

She glances back at her bed. But Christen isn’t there. She turns a little… and sees Christen putting on the t-shirt she had taken from her closet last night, already wearing her printed shorts, and looking so adorable with a sleep-addled pout.

Tobin tries to get Christen’s attention,  _ Hey… sweetheart, why did you get up? _

Christen pouts a little harder, with her eyebrows furrowed as if wondering why Tobin is asking, when she answers,  _ Girlfriend duties? _

Tobin is suddenly wide awake as her jaw drops,  _ Girlfriend? _

Realizing what she just said and looking even more adorable, Christen nervously asks,  _ Can I… still be? _

_ My girlfriend? _

Christen nods sheepishly.

Tobin’s face slowly breaks into a huge smile as she walks over to Christen,  _ Isn’t make-up sex part of girlfriend duties? _

Christen narrows her eyes and keeps her gaze above Tobin’s neck,  _ Yes, but so are nagging and withholding sex. _

Tobin stops a foot away from Christen,  _ No, they’re not! _

_ Oh, yes, they are, especially if girlfriend has so much to do and is already running late for work! _

_ Is this how it’s gonna be? _

Christen freezes.

And upon seeing fear in her eyes, Tobin immediately gives her a reassuring, tight hug, followed by chaste kisses on her neck.

Christen looks like she’s clinging to Tobin for dear life.

When Tobin pulls away, she gives Christen lingering kisses on her cheek… the corner of her eye… her lips… 

With their eyes locked and a tender smile on Tobin’s face, Tobin signs,  _ I love you… Looks like we need to work on a few things. _

Christen nods solemnly before giving Tobin another lingering kiss,  _ I love you… Go shower. I’ll make coffee.  
_ *  
Christen not only makes coffee but also makes Tobin a peanut butter and jelly sandwich to bring for lunch and a bowl of muesli for breakfast.

Once done eating, drinking coffee, and brushing teeth, Tobin goes back to her room, thinking she’ll kiss Christen goodbye, but finds Christen putting on the black pullover she lent Tobin then grabbing the Supreme snapback she gave Tobin from the desk.

She turns to Tobin just when she places the snapback on her head and Tobin looks like she’s about to drool.

_ What? _ Christen tucks a few strands of her curly hair behind her ear.

_ You look so dang hot in that snapback, my love. _

_ Really? _ There’s a tickled smile on Christen’s face as she closes the gap between them. 

_ I don’t want to go to work. Can I call in sick? _

_ Tell you what… _

_ What? _

_ If you promise to finish your deliveries as fast and as carefully as you can today… then I promise to wear this again tonight, _ Christen smirks,  _ and nothing else. _

Tobin groans.

And Christen kisses her before dragging her out the door and driving her to work.

*

Everyone at the hub notices how fast Tobin loads her van this morning.

She gives them all a huge grin and an enthusiastic wave when she’s done.

*

[Tobin]  
_ Looks like I’ll be eating dinner   
_ _ on the road my love _

[Christen]  
_ Okay keep driving safe  
_ _ Be sure to save room for   
_ _ dessert my love ;)  
_ _ Pick you up later _

[Tobin]  
_ Ugh later can’t come soon   
_ _ enough  _

[Christen]  
_ There there  
_ _ I’ll make you come soon   
_ _ enough :D :D :D _

*

Tobin returns to the hub almost an hour earlier than she normally would.

And even after 143 deliveries, she still manages to run to Christen’s car in the parking lot.

Once she gets in, Tobin immediately gives Christen a kiss then asks with a smirk,  _ You still love me? _

Christen smiles,  _ I do. _

_ And you’re really my girlfriend? _

Christen smirks,  _ Hot girlfriend. You said so yourself. _

Tobin laughs,  _ Is today all part of brand-spanking-new girlfriend privileges? _

_ No, it’s all part of girlfriend grovelling for forgiveness. _

Tobin makes a face of disapproval then takes and kisses the back of Christen’s hand,  _ My love. _

_ Yes, my love. _

_ I’m a very simple girl. _

_ Whatever privilege you’re trying to come up with also applies to me. Remember that. _

Tobin’s eyes twinkle as she smiles,  _ You being so smart just makes you even hotter, do you know that? _

_ You don’t have to butter me up, my love, _ Christen gives her a coquettish grin.  _ I’m already wet.  
_ *  
Tobin is at her wits’ end when they get to the apartment and Christen tells her that, one, she needs to shower and, two, Christen won’t be joining her because Christen is done showering (obviously).  
*  
Tobin has barely wiped her body dry with her towel when she wraps it around her body and rushes to her room.

And when Tobin gets inside, Christen is sitting at the desk, with her back turned away from the door and the snapback on.

Tobin locks the door. Christen turns the chair around.

And as promised, Christen is wearing nothing but the cap.

She gets up and strides across the room to get to Tobin, who is already drooling.

And as expected, Tobin lets her towel fall to the floor…   
*  
Hard. Fast. Frantic. Heated. Hurried. Torrid. Unrelenting.

That’s how they’re kissing and groping each other on the bed, with Tobin sitting on it, perched on the side, and Christen straddling her.

Hard. Fast. Frantic. Heated. Hurried. Torrid. Unrelenting.

That’s how Christen’s body starts to tremble and how Tobin thrusts her fingers in and out of Christen.

Hard. Fast. Frantic. Heated. Hurried. Torrid. Unrelenting.

That’s how Christen chants Tobin’s name over and over again until she comes and how she comes, held tightly by Tobin’s other arm.

…Soft… Slow… Calm… Warm… Loving… Tender…  Steady… 

That’s how Christen opens her eyes and how they’re gazing at each other… 

Soft… Slow… Calm… Warm… Loving… Tender… Steady… 

That’s how Christen says, “I love you…” 

Soft… Slow… Calm… Warm… Loving… Tender… Steady… 

That’s how Tobin kisses Christen again… 

_ I love you. _

Tobin thinks they’ll carry on with this pace but realizes soon enough how wrong she is. 

A smirk forms on Christen’s lips as she lifts the snapback off her head… only to start wearing it backwards then diving right back in for another kiss, that’s hard, fast, frantic, heated, hurried, torrid, unrelenting…   
*  
When Christen’s body slumps against Tobin’s after Christen makes her come and Tobin finds the energy to put her arms around Christen, with her forearm hitting the snapback’s brim, their bodies start shaking with uncontrollable laughter… 

…likely from a mix of relief, pleasure, contentment, fulfillment, amusement, joy… 

“Let’s not deprive ourselves again.”

_ Hear, hear! _

They laugh a little bit more until their laughter ends in sighs and Christen lies on her side, followed by Tobin.

_ My love, _ Tobin signs.

_ Yes, my love. _

Tobin wants to ask a serious question but decides to make a last-second change,  _ Can I mark today’s date on your planner? _

_ No, you can’t, my love. I’m sorry. _

Tobin pouts a little as she nods.

Christen can’t help but giggle,  _ Because I’ve already drawn a heart over it. _

_ You have? _

Christen nods, grinning,  _ You can mark the one for next year. _

Tobin grins back. Because that sort of answers the question she meant to ask.  _ When did we become so cheesy? _

_ I don’t know, _ Christen shrugs.  _ Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist right? _

Tobin laughs heartily. Christen looks on with a gleeful smirk. And, of course, they kiss again.

*

The next four days start and end the same way. With a promise. And a payoff.

… _ I promise to wear my new sexy lingerie. _

_ …I’m not a good dancer but, okay, I promise to give you a striptease—No, I’m not doing two songs, Tobin! _

_ …I promise to join you in the shower. It’ll save time. _

_ …Fine. I promise to let you have your way with me in the backseat of my car. Just find a parking spot where we won’t get arrested? _

*

They don’t want to show it or admit it but by Saturday morning (Tobin’s sixth day of work), they’re both exhausted and looking forward to Tobin’s two rest days before another 12-day work shift.

_ What girlfriend privilege did you come up with this morning? _ Christen asks while they’re drinking coffee in the kitchen.

Tobin smirks,  _ Can we try getting each other off at the same time tonight? _

_ Baby, we tried that one time, remember? _ Christen reminds her.  _ And it just didn’t work with me being right handed and you being left handed. _

_ No, I meant another way. _

“Oh.”

They both smile.

_ Can we try it sometime in the next two days instead? _ Christen asks.

Tobin nods, still smiling and moving closer to Christen,  _ Thank you… for giving me something to look forward to everyday. It helped a lot these past few days. Like I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. _

Christen beams as she wraps her arms around Tobin’s shoulders, “That’s what your girlfriend is for.”

Tobin beams backs, holding Christen with one hand and finger spelling with the other,  _ So… tonight? _

“I want to surprise you tonight.”

Tobin raises an eyebrow.

And Christen just giggles before giving Tobin a kiss.

*

_ We’re not going home to the apartment, are we? _ Tobin comments when they turn left instead of making a u-turn from the hub that night.

She isn’t sure if Christen has seen her sign but there’s a shit-eating grin on Christen’s face as Christen drives on.  
*  
Tobin gapes from the moment she realizes that they’re headed to Manhattan Beach to the moment when a doorman opens the passenger door for her in front of the Shade Hotel and she gets out of the car and realizes that Christen has packed their bags.

Christen holds Tobin’s hand as they walk through the lobby and as she speaks with the staff at the front desk. She only lets Tobin’s hand go to give her ID then her credit card and write her signature on a form.

She turns to Tobin while waiting for their key,  _ You haven’t said anything, my love. _

_ Chris…  _

_ It’s not too much, Tobin. _

_ Yes, it is. Are we splitting the bill? _

_ No. And I call girlfriend privilege. _

Tobin rolls her eyes.

_ I want to give you this recovery weekend… surprise… gift. _

Tobin smiles a little,  _ Are you buttering me up because we might talk about the future? _

_ Maybe… but can’t I just… splurge on a really nice staycation with my super hot, incredible, hardworking girlfriend, whom I love very, very much, as an advance birthday gift to myself, too? _

_ Oh, that is so unfair, my love. You know I can’t protest that. _

_ I was counting on that, _ Christen smiles with a lip bite before her attention gets called by the staff, who returns her cards and hands over their room key, and she says, “Thank you.”

Tobin also can’t help but sign,  _ Thank you. _

To her surprise, another staff member signs,  _ You’re welcome. _

Tobin’s eyes widen before she smiles in appreciation. And so does Christen.

“Enjoy your stay.”

Christen turns to Tobin again, smirking,  _ Did you catch that? They said enjoy your stay. _

Tobin rolls her eyes again before they walk hand in hand to the elevator.  
*  
Tobin stands flabbergasted near the bathtub, next to a king size bed, as Christen gives the bellhop a tip before closing the door and walking over to Tobin’s side.

She places a hand on the small of Tobin’s back to get Tobin’s attention then asks,  _ Do you like what you see? _

Tobin blinks at Christen.

Christen smiles and tells her,  _ This is a two-person spa tub. I thought we could start your recovery sessions with this, plus color therapy. We could change the color of the light above it, you see? _

_ And… what else did you… have planned? _

_ Spa treatments… dinner dates… long walks at the beach… _

_ And lots of sex? _

_ Of course, that’s our go-to workout, _ Christen smiles some more.

Tobin shakes her head in disbelief with a faint smile.

“Babe…” 

She locks eyes with Christen.

“...you’re worth it and more.”

They stare at each other for a moment before Tobin slowly wraps her arms around Christen and leans in for a long… and tender… kiss… then signs,  _ You’re worth it and more. _

They stare at each other again before Christen cups Tobin’s face, caressing Tobin’s cheeks with her thumbs and simply asking, “Okay?”

Tobin nods.

So Christen grabs her hand and brings her closer to the tub before turning on the tap to fill it up with water.

Then Christen strips naked, maintaining eye contact with Tobin, and asks,  _ Now, do you like what you see? _

Tobin answers,  _ No. _

_ No? _

_ I love it. I love you. _

Christen gives her an impish grin,  _ I knew you’d come around. _

Tobin chuckles, shaking her head again, as she follows suit and takes off her clothes.  
*  
They’ve been soaking in the tub for quite a while, just cuddling, holding, and caressing each other. 

Tobin is about to doze off when Christen turns to her and cups her face with one hand, wordlessly telling her that perhaps it’s time to get out.

She slowly opens her eyes and kisses the palm of Christen’s hand then nods meekly… 

…and they take their time… getting out of the tub… grabbing towels by the sink… drying themselves off… and getting into bed… 

Tobin lies on her side, in the middle of the bed, with Christen snuggling close to her, their faces nuzzled against the other and their limbs tangled.

Despite being minutes away from sleep, they can’t help but give each other kisses… lazy ones… languid ones… languorous ones… languorous and sultry ones… sultry and sensual ones… steamy ones… so hot and heavy… and passionate… and amorous… and sexy, there’s no denying where it’s headed.

Christen breaks it off with a gentle hand on Tobin’s shoulder, “We don’t have to, my love…”

Tobin hesitates.

“We’ve got time…”

_ Do we? _

They stare at each other for a moment before leaning in for another kiss that’s as loaded as the question… 

And they stare again when they catch their breaths.

“Babe… it’s okay… I know you’re exhausted…”

Without taking her eyes off Christen, Tobin rolls onto her back and brings Christen along until she’s lying on top, wrapping both arms around her tightly and kissing her deeply in response. 

And Christen can’t help but start rolling her hips as they kiss… 

Then Tobin pushes her up a little to start kissing her jaw… down to her neck… going lower… and lower… 

And Tobin pushes her up again to linger on her breasts… one… after the other… 

And Christen soon realizes what Tobin’s intent really is when Tobin pushes again, with her mouth leisurely trailing licks and kisses down Christen’s abs… 

Their gazes meet. And Tobin grabs the back of Christen’s thighs and pulls… until Christen is hovering above her face.

Tobin touches Christen’s wrists then points to the headboard. And Christen complies, placing her palms against it for support, already shivering in anticipation.

Then Tobin urges her to lower herself gently and Christen looks as if she knows Tobin is smirking. And Tobin swears she sees Christen muttering, “Fuck.”

*

Tobin’s eyes flutter open in the morning to a breathtaking view… of Christen gazing at her with a soft smile and loving eyes and fingertips caressing her arm.

“Goob morning, my love…”

Tobin smiles,  _ You’ve had coffee. _

Christen nods adorably. And they both giggle before they share a tender kiss.

“Want some?”

Tobin smirks and raises an eyebrow.

“Shut up.”  
*  
Tobin enjoys her coffee in bed, sitting next to the nightstand and against the headboard, with her legs stretched and Christen’s head resting on her thigh.

_ Breakfast? _ She asks.

_ Actual breakfast? _ Christen replies.

_ Yes, the one for sustenance, _ Tobin smiles innocently,  _ so that we’ll have energy for second breakfast. _

_ But what about third breakfast? _ Christen smirks.

And Tobin lets out a full belly laugh.  
*  
_ You’re judging me, _ Tobin professes once they take their seats at the terrace of the hotel restaurant to enjoy their complimentary breakfast buffet.

_ No, I’m not, _ Christen claims.

_ Then what’s with the Judgy McJudgy face? _

_ You like bagels that much you got three? _

_ I’m from Jersey. We like our bagels. _

_ Plus two pain au chocolat? _

_ We can… share? _

_ You better eat fruit with that. _

_ Only if you feed me, _ Tobin grins.

Christen tries really hard not to smile (but she does).  
*  
_ What time is our spa treatment? _ Tobin asks when they’re done eating.

Christen looks surprised,  _ What? _

_ I assume you’ve already made a reservation? _

_ Am I really that predictable? _

_ Maybe I just know you that well, _ Tobin smiles.

Christen smiles back,  _ 3pm. _

Tobin smiles wider,  _ Plenty of time for second and third breakfast. _

_ And room service, _ Christen adds, with a wider smile of her own.

_ And room service, _ Tobin repeats as they continue to smile stupidly at each other.  
*  
Christen pins Tobin against the door immediately after entering their room… and makes Tobin come with one leg draped over her shoulder as she kneels…   
*  
They don’t stray too far away when Tobin takes her turn, pleasuring Christen from behind… with one hand on her breast and the other… on her clit…   
*  
And after Christen comes, she turns around for a kiss… and Tobin carries her to bed… 

And the moment Christen’s back hits the mattress, they start laughing hysterically again.

And when their laughter dies, they hold each other… and stare lovingly at each other… and then Christen sighs… “I wish… I wish so hard that there’s a team in LA I could play for, my love…”

_ But there isn’t. _

Christen nods.

And Tobin gives her a lingering kiss before asking,  _ Where’s the nearest team, my love? _

_ Portland. But I can’t play for them. _

_ Why not? _

_ They already have Alex Morgan. _

_ Lauren mentioned that name once. _

_ We’re both forwards. _

_ And they couldn’t have you both playing for the same team at the same time because it would be too awesome? _

Christen laughs,  _ I love you. _

Tobin beams,  _ I love you. _

And they go back to staring… and caressing… until Christen calmly gets up, sets a pillow against the headboard, leans against it, and wriggles her fingers with a soft smile, asking Tobin to join her. Which Tobin does. But instead of resting her back against the headboard, Tobin leans sideways, sitting cross-legged, to be closer to Christen.

They hold hands, playing with each other’s fingers, before Christen takes a deep breath and sighs again.

_ Story time? _ Tobin asks.

Christen smiles and nods before giving Tobin a quick kiss.

More than a beat later, Christen still hasn’t signed or said anything so Tobin gives her an encouraging smile and starts,  _ Once upon a time…  _

Christen laughs.

_ There was a pretty princess named… _

_ Pressy? _

Tobin smiles and nods enthusiastically in agreement, then continues,  _ Who, after studying in the town of Palo Alto in the Kingdom of California, traveled to the town of…  _

_ Boca Raton. _

_ Florida? Really? _

“Yep.”

_ …to join… _

_ MagicJack. _

_ …a company of… _

_ Gameball contestants. _

_ Gameball? _

_ It’s what medieval football was called. _

_ Sweetheart, it can be anything you want it to be. _

_ Fine. A company of acrobats then… Because all Princess Pressy ever wanted was to get called upon by the… United 50 Kingdoms team, which is the best team of acrobats in the world. And she knew, for that to happen, she needed to join a company that’s part of the… Guild of Acrobats. _

_ And then? _

_ But then… but then the United 50 Kingdoms team didn’t give her a call and the Guild of Acrobats folded a year after she joined MagicJack, before she even got to move to another company in the Kingdom of Georgia. _

_ So that’s why Pretty Princess Pressy moved to another continent? _

_ Yes… she didn’t know what to do… but then she heard a ship was sailing to the other continent in five days… So four days later, she packed her bags and boarded the ship to join the team in Gothenburg, Sweden. _

_ Wow… How did that feel? _

_ Terrifying… and liberating at the same time. But mostly liberating. _

_ Because? _

_ Leaving for Sweden felt like leaving the sense of… failing… and a lot of the single-minded aspiration to make the national team behind… Nobody was watching, nobody cared what I was doing… I got to play without the weight on my back that I wasn’t good enough. And that transformed me as a player and as a person. I simply played the game for myself again, not for results or titles or records or the national team coach’s attention. _

_ How long ago was this? _

_ Two years ago—almost three years ago now… since I left for Sweden… Ironically, just a month after I got there, I was called up to my first national team camp… although I really didn’t start playing for them until last year. They even brought me as an alternate for the Olympics. _

_ You’re an Olympian?! _

_ Almost… almost an Olympian… story of my life… since college, really. Always almost. Almost an NCAA Champion— _

_ Wait, what? _

_ I lost two NCAA finals. The first one to UNC and the second one to Notre Dame—you made a face just now. _

_ It’s nothing. _

_ What is it? _ Christen urges.

_ I almost went to UNC. _

_ Really? _

_ They offered me a full-ride scholarship. _

_ But? _

_ In exchange, I’d be one of their guinea pigs. They have one of the best audiology programs in the country but I… I didn’t want to get a cochlear implant. _

_ I was wondering about that, my love. _

_ Why I never mentioned it? _

_ Not exactly that…  _

_ You can ask, my love. _

_ Were you… born deaf? _

_ No, I wasn’t. I lost my hearing when I was three years old. _

_ Was it… hard, for lack of a better term… when you were young? _

_ I don’t remember it being hard. I was a happy kid. I was always just quietly playing in the backyard or in the corner, entertaining myself. _

_ Did your parents ever consider getting you an implant? _

_ I have no idea. _

_ Why don’t you want one? _

_ It’ll cramp my style. _

Christen gives her a look that clearly says, ‘Seriously?’

_ I’m kidding,  _ Tobin smiles sheepishly.  _ The serious answer is… I don’t remember what it was like when I still could hear. I mean, there’s ringing in my ears occasionally, which is normal, like, as long as it’s not persistent then it’s fine… So this is all I’ve ever known and I’m cool with it. I have no interest in changing it. _

Christen smiles back and leans in for another kiss,  _ I love you just the way you are, my love. _

_ Thank you… I love you just the way you are, my love. And if you were to ask me if there were times when I was… curious to hear… just a tiny bit, since I really have no desire to hear and have never felt like I’m missing out because I couldn’t hear… then I would tell you it was every time you laughed. _

Christen smiles lovingly at Tobin and kisses her again… 

…and again… 

…and again…

And they go for a slow… and thorough… third breakfast... with Christen making Tobin come with both legs over her shoulders… and Tobin making Christen come twice, with pillows underneath her hips…   
*  
They snuggle close and don’t let go until their stomachs start to rumble and they’re forced to give in to literal hunger and order room service.

They order fish tacos and a sesame crusted tuna salad with mango and crispy wonton and they don’t think twice about getting truffle fries.

They eat leisurely with their bathrobes on and Tobin asking Christen to continue telling her story in between bites.

Christen tells Tobin about Gothenburg and her first national team camp… then about transferring to Tyresö because they were more willing to let her play for the national team than Gothenburg… and about her first matches with the national team last year and scoring three goals in two games (a new record). 

She also tells her about the new US women’s soccer league, called NWSL, established last year.

_ Is that the goal now? To play in the NWSL? _ Tobin asks.

_ No, my love. The goal is and always has been to play for the national team. _

_ And you’re already playing for them. _

_ Yes, but my place with them isn’t secure until they hire me. _

_ Oh. Is that what those plans are—the ones you mentioned? _

_ It’s what they alluded to when they called at the beginning of the year, yes… I expected I would… join the NWSL mid-season this year… after Tyresö’s Champions League run ended…  _

They stay silent for a while, both knowing and thinking that Christen’s injury threw a wrench into these plans.

Then Tobin asks,  _ How is that supposed to go exactly? _

_ I would be signing a contract with the US Soccer Federation… They would be paying my salary and allocating my playing rights to a club team, which, since last year, should be in the NWSL. _

_ Did you want to move back and join the NWSL? Or were you happy playing in Sweden? _

_ Last year, it didn’t matter which club I was playing for and where, as long as I was playing with the national team… I only started getting really interested in the NWSL at the start of the year… simply because my ex got signed and left Sweden all of a sudden. _

_ To play where? _

_ Portland. _

_ Seriously? _ Tobin laughs.  _ What is up with Portland?! Is it really the place to be? _

Christen can’t help but laugh, too,  _ I heard it’s an excellent city to play for, actually, and the fans are amazing. Imagine drawing a crowd of 20,000 people every match. _

_ Your ex told you that? _

_ And Alex… who is really one of the reasons why that team is successful and has an avid following… Not at all surprising since she’s the new face of the national team. _

_ Them not making you “the” face is a missed opportunity, in my opinion. _

_ Alex is strikingly beautiful, sweetheart. _

_ I bet you’re more strikingly beautiful than her. _

_ You’re biased. _

_ I have every right to be. _

Christen can only shake her head as she smiles.

_ Wait…  _

_ What? _ Christen asks.

_ Is your ex on the national team, too? _

_ She is… _

Tobin’s face drops.

_ …for Spain.  _

Tobin pouts so hard that Christen bursts into laughter before giving Tobin lots and lots of kisses. 

_ I’m sorry, my love… _ (kiss) _ I was just teasing…  _ (kiss, kiss) _ You have nothing to worry about, whether she’s my teammate or not…  _ (kiss) _ I heard she’ll be playing in Germany this coming year…  _ (kiss, kiss) _ I love you…  _ (kiss, kiss) _ I’m in love with you and no one else…  _ (kiss) _ Please stop pouting…  _

“Hmph.”

Since simply being cute doesn’t work, Christen tries a different tactic,  _ You love me, don’t you? _

Tobin gives her a fake glare but nods.

_ You love me very, very much? _

Tobin rolls her eyes and nods again.

_ Do you feel that I love you very, very much? _

Tobin drops her pout and sighs and nods more enthusiastically.

Christen smiles softly and waits… 

_ So your ex is Spanish. _

_ Yes. _

Tobin pauses before asking another question,  _ Did you have to learn Spanish for her? _

Christen looks like she knows where this is going,  _ No, my love. I had to learn Spanish to study in Madrid. _

_ What about your other ex? _

_ Swedish. And I had to learn the language a little bit because I play there. But I’m still awful at it. _

Tobin bows her head and sighs again,  _ Please don’t learn a new language soon…  _

_ Hey… please look at me, _ Christen begs.

A beat, then Tobin meets her gaze.

_ I never expected to be so attached to sign… The more I learn about it, the more convinced I am that it’s the most beautiful and amazing language there is… And I’m hoping… really hoping that it’s a lasting one… a language I’ll get to keep for life. _

Tobin searches her eyes before asking,  _ Do you really mean that? _

Christen nods earnestly before holding Tobin’s left hand in both of hers, kissing the back of it, then placing it over her heart, “I am yours, Tobin…” 

Tobin kisses the back of Christen’s hand then signs,  _ And I am yours, Chris. _

Christen nods again before they both lean in to hold each other and kiss all the spots that they can kiss… 

Then Christen gives Tobin one more lingering kiss before standing up slowly and telling her,  _ Come on, sweetheart… Let’s get rid of that tension in your body. _

Tobin’s eyebrows rise as her eyes widen a little,  _ You mean with second lunch? _

_ I mean with massage. _

_ Not sexy massage? _

_ It better not be sexy since a masseuse will be touching your body instead of me. _

Tobin chuckles before following Christen like a good puppy.

*

They’re the picture of bliss, walking out of the spa, holding hands and strolling along the street to Manhattan Beach Post, Christen’s favorite restaurant in the area, for dinner.

Tobin watches closely as the maitre d’ greets Christen by name and as Christen orders appetizers and drinks immediately after being seated at their table, without a menu.

She thinks Christen ordered two different wines but is pleasantly surprised when the waiter comes back and places a bottle of beer on her side of the table.

_ Lauren may have let it slip one time that you actually prefer beer, _ Christen smiles.

Tobin smiles back sheepishly then raises her bottle and stares into Christen’s eyes. Christen stares right back and clinks her wine glass against Tobin’s beer, “Cheers, babe… Love you…” And Tobin gives her a one-handed  _ I love you _ before they both take a sip.  
*  
When their food arrives, Christen’s eyes suddenly go wide,  _ You know what I just realized, after all these months? _

_ What? _

_ We can actually talk while chewing our food! _

Tobin laughs.  
*  
They talk about mundane things for a while until there’s a lull in their conversation and Christen looks at Tobin curiously.

_ What? _ Tobin asks.

_ You want to ask more serious questions… I can tell…  _

Tobin smiles softly, then nods,  _ I do. _

_ Can you ask… just one more… tonight? _

Tobin nods again and takes her time in choosing the best one, then asks,  _ What’s our best case scenario? _

_ We stay together, _ Christen answers, without missing a beat.

And Tobin’s face lights up then breaks into a smile so joyful, like something just… clicks,  _ Yes, that’s what really matters, isn’t it? _

The same thing happens on Christen’s face, like clarity sneaks up on her and forms into a smile,  _ You’re right… The other things are just… secondary. _

Tobin nods, still beaming,  _ Right, while details like where you play… what our schedules are… how far away we are from each other and how often we get to see each other in person are important, they’re not as important as, say, our families being safe and healthy… or you still playing soccer with the national team… and me still working…  _

_ And us staying together, _ Christen rounds off, with a more radiant smile.

_ And that’s what we can work on, right? Just staying together… The same way you can work towards a full recovery then getting back your…  _

_ …playing form. _

_ Yes, that! And you know what the amazing thing is? _

_ I can bounce back and be better. _

_ Exactly! So, like, whatever hardship we’ll encounter with the distance and the schedule and all those other pesky stuff, we can overcome… And we will endure. _

Christen’s radiant smile turns dreamy,  _ You know… if I weren’t completely… and utterly in love with you already, that might’ve been the moment. _

Tobin just grins even wider.

_ You’re a godsend, my love. _

_ God works in mysterious ways, my love. _

*

They can’t wipe the smiles off their faces for the next few days. And they don’t even try.

They can’t when Tobin offers to pay for dinner and Christen says yes… and when they walk back to their hotel from Manhattan Beach Post holding hands… and when they make love for the nth time… then bring each other to sleep with gentle, loving touches… 

They still can’t when they wake up the next day, drink coffee, eat breakfast, try to get each other off at the same time (and even when they only manage to make each other come in quick succession).

They still can’t when they soak in the tub again, order room service again, and make love again, and again… making the most of their late check-out before heading to the beach and laying out in the sun, with Christen reading a book and Tobin writing an unassigned article on hot baths vs. ice baths.

They still can’t when they close out their recovery weekend (surprise) (gift) with dinner at Christen’s second favorite restaurant… with Tobin realizing that she hasn’t made a delivery for Channing in recent weeks and Christen confessing that she asked Channing not to order anything to add to Tobin’s deliveries.

They still can’t when they get home and Tobin goes back to work, with a new set of promises and payoffs… this time, for Christen…

_ …If you do better in your drills today… then we can… we can… I don’t know—have sex however you like. _

_ However I like? _

_ However you like. _

_ Can I cash in on that at a later time? _

_ What? What do you mean? Why? _

_ I’ve always wanted to try toys. _

Tobin sputters as Christen smirks in amusement.

_ In the meantime, there’s always your desk… and your wall… and the backseat of my car… and my bed… with my sturdy headboard…  _

*

Tobin’s smile only falters (a little) when she receives a text from Christen on Thursday, before lunch.

[Christen]  
_ My love, US Soccer called   
_ _ just now   
_ _ It was a good call but not the   
_ _ best call  
_ _ Keep driving safe ttyl  
_ _ I love you _

She steels herself before replying.

[Tobin]  
_ Yay good call! :)  
_ _ I love you _

*

_ So what did they say? _ Tobin asks immediately after kissing and hugging Christen inside the car when Christen picks her up that night.

_ I’ve been called in for the training camp in January. _

_ That’s a good thing, right? _

_ It is. _

_ It means you’re very much part of the team. _

_ But it also means they’re not making me a federation player— _

_ Not yet, anyway. _

_ —and I have to leave for Sweden. _

_ Which only means your way forward is clear and you have a job to go back to. _

_ And a love I can come home to? _

_ Honey, I will love you in a boat. I will love you with a goat. _

Christen manages not to snort,  _ You will love me here and there? _

Tobin grins,  _ I will love you anywhere. _

*

They drive to the airport the following night to drop Lauren off for her red eye flight to Newark for the holidays.

_ Remember what I said, _ Lauren reminds them for the nth time.

Tobin rolls her eyes,  _ As if we can forget ‘no sex on the couch or you’ll have to buy a new one,’ _ before giving Lauren a hug.

“Don’t even think about it, Christen,” Lauren warns.

“What? I wasn’t thinking about anything,” Christen denies as she pulls Lauren in for their hug.

“Your smirk says otherwise,” Lauren tells her. “We all know you can afford it.”

Christen chuckles, “Safe travels, Lauren. Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas, lovebirds. Thanks for the ride. Take good care of my car, Tobs.”

Tobin nods as they watch Lauren head to pre-departure before going back inside Christen’s car.

_ My love, _ Tobin looks thoughtful as she sits in the passenger seat.

_ Yes, my love. _

_ Can… your flight back to Sweden be on my rest day? _

_ I… I can’t guarantee that, my love. I’m sorry. _

_ Can you please try anyway? _

Christen nods,  _ Okay, I’ll try. _

_ Thank you. _

They both look somber for a second. But then just like that, Christen smirks again as she starts the car,  _ My love. _

_ Yes, my love. _

_ We can tear each other’s clothes off the moment we lock the front door. _

They share one look and giggle all the way to Tobin’s bed.

*

The morning after starts a little bit differently than the rest, with Tobin insisting that Christen stays in bed and sleeps some more before waking her up again with kisses when she’s ready to leave.

(The plan is for Tobin to take Lauren’s car to and from work while Christen hangs back at the apartment and packs her clothes to bring home to the Presses’ because they’ve agreed to spend the holidays there.)

When Christen opens her eyes, she immediately notices Tobin’s grin, “You seem excited… What’s got into you this morning?”

_ I’m sleeping in your bed for the first time. _

“But, sweetheart—”

_ Shhh… It’s my first time. _

Christen laughs and rewards Tobin’s cuteness with an ardent kiss.

*

They get to check how sturdy Christen’s headboard really is that night and are thankful that Tyler is no longer staying or sleeping in her room next door.

*

Four nights later, on Christmas Eve, Tobin rolls in around 9:30pm to find Christen wrapping gifts on the floor in her room.

_ Hi, honey, _ Christen immediately gives her a big smile.

And Tobin immediately kneels next to her to give her a kiss.

_ Should I put both our names on these gifts? _ Christen asks.

Tobin slaps her forehead,  _ I’m sorry, I should’ve asked you about joint gifts. _

_ Don’t worry about it, sweetheart. _

_ I bought gifts for your family. _

_ Oh, you did? _ Christen grins.

_ It’s not much…  _

_ I’m sure they’ll like it, baby. _

_ I already put them under the tree before going upstairs. _

_ Thank you, my love, _ Christen gives her another kiss.

_ Can we do joint gifts next year? _

Christen nods,  _ For your family, too? _

_ Yeah, about that…  _

_ What? _

_ Can I introduce you to them tomorrow morning when we FaceTime before I go to work? _

Christen smiles with a lip bite,  _ Yes, of course. Thanks for asking. Now I know I need to grab coffee early. _

Tobin laughs before giving her another kiss.  
*  
They laugh again later as they lie in bed naked, sated, and out of breath.

_ Merry Christmas, baby, _ Christen beams.

_ Best. Christmas gift. Ever.  _ Tobin grins.

*

Tobin is in for a surprise on Christmas morning when she goes down to the kitchen, after showering and putting on her uniform, and finds Christen, Channing, Stacy, and Cody hanging around the kitchen island, in matching Christmas pajamas, holding mugs.

They all wish her a Merry Christmas and give her long hugs before Christen hands her a cup of coffee and gives her a really sweet kiss on the cheek.  
*  
She makes the call to her mom in the living room and they’ve been talking for a few minutes when Tobin checks if Lauren brought them their gifts.

_ “She brought them yesterday, Tobs. Thank you,” _ Her mom tells her with a smile.  _ “And she might’ve mentioned that there’s something you haven’t been telling us.” _

Tobin laughs and shakes her head,  _ I knew it. _

_ “So what is it? Did you meet someone special?” _

Tobin beams,  _ Very special, Mom. _

_ “If that smile is anything to go by, I bet she’s extraordinary.” _

Tobin nods,  _ She is. I haven’t told you because we only made it official recently. _

Her mom laughs, “ _ Of course you knew I was going to ask that.” _

_ I also knew you’d be dying to meet her so would you like to meet her now? _

“Ooh, yes!” Her mom excitedly answers before shouting, “Perry! Katie! Come here, quick!”

Tobin laughs again,  _ Mom! Mom! I’m in her house. With her family. _

_ “Even better…”  _ Her sisters show up behind their mom and they exchange Merry Christmases and I miss you’s before their mom says, “We’re finally meeting Tobin’s girl… and her family, too.”

“Oh, my gosh! I knew it!” Perry beams.

_ “You better send a lengthy email giving us all the juicy details about this on your next rest day, got it?” _ Katie demands.

Tobin rolls her eyes,  _ Okay, okay. I’ll bring my phone to the kitchen now. _

Christen sees Tobin approaching and they share loving smiles before Christen seems to stop herself from giggling.

Tobin gives her a questioning look.

_ They’re laughing at the look on your face, sweetheart, saying you must be hopelessly in love with me, _ Christen tells her.

Tobin narrows her eyes at her phone and her mom and sisters turn serious for a second before bursting into giggles again. Tobin can only shake her head with a smile as she stands beside Christen.

Christen leans closer to her then smiles at her phone, “Hi! Merry Christmas! I’m Christen. It’s so nice to meet you.”

“It’s so nice to meet you, dear. I’m Cindy. And this is Katie…” 

“Hi Christen. Merry Christmas!”

“...And Perry.”

“Nice to meet you, Christen!”

Stacy immediately joins the call and pretty soon, they’re all gushing about how beautiful they all are.

*

_ My love…  _ Tobin gapes once she opens her Christmas gift from Christen—a pair of new release black, white, and blue, retro high-cut Nike Air Jordan 1.  _ Thank you! _

Christen stares at her gift from Tobin with reverence—a personalized moleskine planner with her name etched on the front cover, filled with Tobin’s drawings and doodles of significant things for both of them from front to back.  _ This is so beautiful, my love. Thank you! _

Then she looks like she suddenly remembers something, hastily opens her new planner, and flips through the pages. 

She reaches the 8th of December soon enough and just as she suspects, Tobin has drawn all around it to mark their anniversary.

They look at each other with knowing smiles, both eager to give each other thanks the best way they know how.

*

Christen’s reaction isn’t the same four days later when she opens her birthday gift from Tobin—two pairs of hand painted shin guards, one in green and blue and the other in pink and orange.

She looks at Tobin with tear-filled eyes and smiles woefully before kissing her with everything she can’t seem to say.

*

Two nights later, they happily kiss each other at midnight to ring in the new year, with empty champagne flutes in their hands, surrounded by the boisterous Press Pack.

(A little while later, they fill Christen’s room with more oohs and aahs, trying to set off their own fireworks.)

*

They continue to “start the new year right” for the next three nights and the whole fourth day when they go back to Tobin’s apartment and take full advantage of Tobin’s (finally normal) shorter work days (and one rest day) and the fact that Lauren isn’t coming back until the 5th of January, which is also the same day Christen starts training camp in Carson, just a couple of miles away.

*

Tobin eagerly waits for Christen’s texts every day and FaceTime calls every night since her first day at camp. And in their first FaceTime call, Christen tells Tobin how happy she is about her designated roommate.

_ Who is Ali again? _ Tobin asks.

_ She’s one of our best defenders and my former teammate in Tyresö. _

_ And you two haven’t—? _

_ Oh, gosh, no! Tobin! _

Tobin looks sheepish,  _ Sorry, just asking. _

_ She’s one of my best friends and very much in love with Ashlyn—also a former Tyresö teammate and one of my best friends—but you can’t tell anybody about their relationship, not even Lauren. _

_ Okay… What position does Ashlyn play again? _

_ Ash is a goalkeeper. _

They go through individual pictures of most of Christen’s teammates, by order of how much they mean to Christen (because Christen has already shown Tobin a team photo two nights ago). They laugh as they assign name signs to the ones who matter.

*

On her second night at camp, Christen shares about going through the tough fitness tests and feeling optimistic about her own fitness.

Tobin has a dreamy smile on her face the whole time,  _ Do you always look this darn good after training or playing? _

Christen rolls her eyes,  _ Baby, I’m already in love with you. _

_ All the more reason to keep wooing you, _ Tobin grins,  _ so that you stay in love with me. _

Christen gives her a delicious smile.

_ I love you. _

_ I love you. _

*

On her third night, Christen worries Tobin a bit because she starts the call with,  _ Honey, I’m so sorry. _

_ What happened? _

_ I told Kelley about you and she insisted that we meet for dinner tomorrow on our day off. _

Tobin chuckles,  _ That’s what you’re worried about? _

_ I said yes without you agreeing to it—Kelley can be very persistent. _

_ Kelley was your Stanford teammate, right? _

_ Yes. _

_ It’s totally fine, sweetheart, if it’s just with her _

_ Can Ash and Ali tag along? They want to meet you, too. _

_ Okay. _

_ And Kelley might want to bring someone else so she won’t be a fifth wheel. _

_ Please just text me the details once you have it, my love. _

*

Christen texts Tobin the following afternoon to tell her that dinner will be in Fishing with Dynamite, near Manhattan Beach Post.

Then she texts again just when Tobin is about to leave the apartment.

[Christen]  
_ Babe   
_ _ How would you feel if I said   
_ _ more people want to meet   
_ _ you and come to dinner? _

[Tobin]  
_ How many? _

[Christen]  
_ Half the team? _

[Tobin]  
_ Jeez  
_ _ Seriously?! _

[Christen]  
_ I’m so sorry babe  
_ _ I proudly showed photos of you   
_ _ and now they want to “see how  
_ _ hot you are in person” _

Tobin rolls her eyes.

Then she asks Lauren if she looks hot enough. And Lauren, of course, makes a few inspiring tweaks to her outfit.  
*  
Tobin walks into the restaurant wearing an orange snapback, a snug-fitting plain white tee, a pair of tight-fitting blue jeans, and her Air Jordan 1, with her hair down and a gray cardigan tied around her waist.

She immediately spots Christen’s curls and bare arms and the blonde in front of Christen must’ve said something because Christen suddenly turns around and flashes a megawatt smile at Tobin.

Everything else just sort of fades away when Christen throws herself at her for a really tight hug and discrete kisses on her neck… 

_ I miss you, _ Christen signs with a little frown while still standing really close to her.  _ I’m so bummed that I can’t kiss you the way I want to, right now. _

_ I miss you, too, so much, _ Tobin gives her a soft smile.  _ But it’s okay, my love, we’ll get to kiss the way we want again soon. _

Christen sighs then suddenly rolls her eyes,  _ They’re wolf-whistling. I better start the introductions.  
_ *  
_ “This is Ali,” _ Christen says and signs at the same time.

Ali gives Tobin a super megawatt smile as she shakes Tobin’s hand, “Nice to meet you, Tobin.”

Tobin beams and signs back as Christen says, “She says it’s nice to meet you too, Al, and you have a very pretty smile.”

“Oh, thank you! You’re so sweet.”

Tobin can’t help but smile wider.

_ “And this is Ash,” _ Christen introduces the blonde next to Ali.

Ashlyn opts for a fist-bump then tells Christen, “I think you got a keeper, sis.”

_ Ha! Pun-ny! _ Tobin exclaims.

And Christen can’t help but giggle.

“What did she say?” Ashlyn asks.

“She’s very happy with the pun, Ash,” Christen says before glancing at Tobin. “And now she’s saying you should make it your wedding hashtag.”

“What wedding hashtag?”

_ Ali got a keeper? _ Tobin suggests.

Christen smiles,  _ “Krieger got a keeper.” _

Tobin grins and nods as Ashlyn guffaws with a hand clap, “That hashtag is fiiiire! We’re keepin’ it.”

Tobin and Ashlyn pause to look at each other then bust out laughing again.  
*  
_ “This is Kelley.” _

Kelley places a hand on Tobin’s shoulder, looking straight into her eyes with a super serious face, and says, “So, Tobinho. What are your intentions with our dear Christen?”

“Kell!” 

Tobin replies with a face that’s just as serious,  _ I intend to make her come— _

“Tobin!”  
*  
_ “This is Alex.” _

“She’s really cute, Presi.”

“She can lip read, Alex.”

“Oh… well… it’s true.”

_ Thank you, _ Tobin smiles then turns to Christen,  _ I was right, sweetheart. You’re prettier than her. _

_ Shut up. You’re super biased. _

“What’s she saying?” Alex asks.

“She says thanks and you’re pretty awesome.”

“Oh, is she a fan?”

“She doesn’t really know who we are.”

“Seriously?! You’ve got to bring her to the games, Presi.”

“Oh, I plan to drag her at some point. She only watches Arsenal.”

“What?!”

_ “Alex is a Liverpool fan,” _ Christen tells Tobin.

Tobin immediately gives Alex a thumbs down while blowing a raspberry.

Alex playfully glares at her and crosses her arms over her chest, “We’ll see about that, gunner.”  
*  
_ “This is Pinoe.” _

“Alex is right. She is cute,” says Megan Rapinoe.

Christen smiles sweetly as she turns to Tobin, who signs thanks.

“Hang on, Press,” Megan grabs a table napkin before turning back to Christen. “There’s something on your… Is that drool?”

“Pinoe!”

Tobin starts laughing so hard Christen smacks her arm. Then she bounces animatedly towards Christen and gives her a playful hug.

_ You’re lucky you’re cute, _ Christen tells her.

_ I’m lucky you’re cute! _ Tobin grins.

And someone must’ve said something because Christen takes a quick sideways glance before sighing and grinning back at Tobin, “I know…”  
*  
They make the rounds until Tobin is introduced to everyone. 

She meets Meghan Klingenberg or Kling, who is also one of Christen’s best friends, and Christen’s childhood friend Whitney (both Tyresö teammates), quiet Alyssa, newbies Crystal, Julie, and Morgan, then Sydney and Kristie, and veteran players Becky, Abby, and Heather.

They’re a rowdy bunch. And they all seem to be vying for Tobin’s attention.

_ I’m sorry, sweetheart, _ Christen signs as they take their seats,  _ they can be overwhelming. _

_ They’re all speaking at the same time. I can’t keep up, _ Tobin confesses.

She suddenly feels a hand on her forearm and turns to see Ashlyn, holding her phone and typing,  _ Awesome… kicks… dude! _

Tobin smiles and brings out her phone to type,  _ Thanks… Chris… gave… them… to me… for Christmas. _

_ Did… you… notice… Pinoe’s? _ Ashlyn asks.

_ I did… They… look… awesome, _ Tobin replies.

_ She’s… a huge… sneakerhead… You… should… see… her… collection. _

_ I hope… I get to… someday, _ Tobin looks up from her phone to smile at Ashlyn again and sees Ashlyn nodding, but not at her. She quickly turns to her left and catches Christen saying thanks.

From there on out, it feels like they all take turns calling dibs on who gets to talk to Tobin next.  
*  
_ I wish I asked you to bring my car, _ Christen pouts when they’re waiting for their bill.

_ I borrowed Lauren’s car, _ Tobin smirks.

And Christen’s face lights up like it’s Christmas all over again,  _ You did? _

_ I didn’t know how or where or if I’d get to kiss you so I decided to up my chances. _

_ I love you! _ Christen beams,  _ I am so kissing you senseless! _

(Christen is nothing if not a woman of her word.)

*

The next night, Christen is all smiles in their FaceTime call,  _ I can’t believe how making out with you can be such a booster. I did so well today! _

Tobin waggles her brows,  _ Imagine if we did more than just make out. _

Christen rolls her eyes,  _ We’d be buying Lauren a new car. _

Tobin laughs.

*

The next night, it’s the complete opposite.

_ They didn’t let me join the full scrimmage today, _ Christen signs sadly.

_ It’s best that you’re eased into playing, right? _ Tobin points out.

Christen sighs,  _ Right. _

_ And we don’t want anything that can delay your full recovery. _

_ Yes, sweetheart. _

_ And we have Monday to have sex all day. _

Christen laughs.

They stare at each other for a while, with their eyes twinkling, before Tobin signs,  _ Two more sleeps. _

_ Two more sleeps, _ Christen smiles.  _ Can’t wait. _

*

It’s a good thing Tobin decides to take a shower immediately after waking up on Monday because Christen seems to have done the same thing.

She arrives at Tobin’s a little after 8am for her second day off (from camp), barrels straight into Tobin’s arms after Tobin opens the front door, and kisses Tobin all the way to her room…   
*  
She must be really exhausted from training because she falls asleep after two rounds, with Tobin spooning and caressing her.

And Tobin smiles softly in amazement at how they seem to be breathing the same way, at the same time. 

And that’s when it hits her square in the chest… the realization that these past few days apart will turn into weeks and months soon. Sooner than Tobin thinks. Sooner than Tobin would’ve liked. Sooner than Tobin can comprehend. 

She starts breathing rapidly and heavily. And soon, tears start falling down her face. And soon, her chest is heaving in painful sobs.

She doesn’t want to wake Christen up. So she leaves her bed as carefully as she can then sits at her desk, gazing at Christen, willing her sobs to quiet down, desperately wiping away her tears, and praying… that Christen doesn’t see her like this… 

*

The perfect distraction comes in the form of an unexpected email the next day.

And after watching Christen recount her third to the last day at camp in their FaceTime call, Christen asks how Tobin’s day is going and Tobin shares her news.

_ I got an email from the Wall Street Journal, my love. _

“Oh, my gosh…”  _ What did it say? _

_ They asked if they could interview me for a piece on deaf drivers. They read the Times article and got my email from the editor. They said they were originally thinking of doing a piece on deaf Uber drivers since that became a thing recently. But now they want to… expand it, I guess. _

_ Did you say yes? _

_ Do you think I should say yes? _

Christen takes a moment to think it through,  _ I don’t see any reason why you shouldn’t. I do think you need to give ShipX a heads up if you say yes. But other than that, this might open up other opportunities down the line. At the very least, it will serve as great exposure not just to you as a deaf individual but also to the deaf community at large… Do you want to do it? _

_ I do. But I wanted to run it by you, first. _

Christen smiles,  _ If you want to do it, then I’m all for it, my love. _

Tobin smiles back,  _ I love you. _

_ I love you. _

*

Tobin comes home two nights later to a sleeping Christen in her bed, looking so serene that all Tobin can think of is joining her.

So she does (after taking a quick shower).

And shortly after wrapping an arm around her tightly, Christen stirs… long enough to turn and snuggle up (closer) to Tobin.

*

Christen seems to be in deep thought when she picks up Tobin at the hub the next night.

Tobin feels something is up when she gets inside and Christen gives her a strangely subdued smile before grabbing the front of her shirt with one hand, cradling her neck with the other, and kissing her in a way that feels… profoundly emotional… 

_ Do you have… bad news or…? _ Tobin trails off.

Christen gives her another soulful kiss… 

Then she takes a deep breath and tells her,  _ I‘m officially signed for Tyresö today. _

Tobin gives her a weak smile.

_ And I made the roster for the first set of international friendlies with the national team. _

_ That’s awesome, _ Tobin smiles genuinely this time.  _ I’m so glad you made it— _

_ —despite not being fully fit, I know. I was surprised by it, to be honest. But Alex took a knock and injured her ankle so she won’t be able to play in the next few weeks. And we only had five forwards to begin with—I mean, I’m sure there are at least two midfielders who can be forwards—but now there’s really only Abby, Sydney, and me because the fifth forward who was at camp didn’t make it. _

_ And they’re bringing you in as a sub, since you can’t play the full 90 minutes right away? _

Christen nods,  _ That’s the plan. _

_ Seems like a great way to ease you back into the game. _

Christen smiles and nods again but then her eyes start swimming in tears,  _ I’m flying out sooner than I thought I would. _

Tobin tries to ignore the lump that’s forming in her throat,  _ When? _

_ On the 26th. _

_ That’s… next Monday. _

Christen nods feebly this time,  _ That’s in… ten days, my love. _

_ Ten days? _ Tobin’s lips start to quiver… but she inhales deeply through her nose to collect herself and manages to smile at Christen,  _ Then let’s make every moment count, my love. _

*

“Ten tacos al pastor, please,” Christen says when it’s their turn to order at Leo’s Tacos Truck the following night. “And two horchatas.”

_ Ten? _ Tobin double-checks after handing over a twenty-dollar bill to pay for their meal.

Christen smirks,  _ You say you want four but you’ll probably eat six. _

Tobin laughs.

_ And, _ Christen continues,  _ I really don’t want to fall in line again. _

It’s a Saturday night and there’s a steady stream of people queuing up for tacos. But the line seems to be moving fairly quickly.

_ Why not? _ Tobin asks.

There’s a naughty glint in Christen’s eyes when she bites her lower lip,  _ I have other cravings. _

*

Nine orgasms later and Tobin finds herself getting dragged down a ramp in Marina Del Rey to board a sailboat for what she assumes is a sunset cruise that Sunday afternoon.

_ Chris… _

_ Don’t give me that look, sweetheart, _ Christen reproaches her.  _ It’s a family friend’s boat. _

_ Did you get it for free? _ Tobin challenges.

_ I don’t think anyone would want to give away their sailboat for free. _

_ Ha ha. You know that’s not what I meant. _

Christen gives her the most charming smile,  _ Grumpy, I want my LA sunset. And this is one of the best ways, if not the best way to see it.  _

Tobin can’t resist returning the smile after slightly shaking her head.

Christen smiles even wider,  _ And didn’t you say you’ll love me in a boat? _

Tobin perks up,  _ You mean we can—? _

_ No!  _ Christen laughs,  _ That is absolutely not what I meant. _

_ Like there’s no cabin room or something? _

“Tobin!”

_ Not even remotely possible? _

Christen smirks,  _ Maybe if you play your cards right, _ before turning her back on Tobin and sashaying further down the ramp, towards the boat.

Tobin grins and enjoys the view… 

…and surprisingly enjoys the actual view as they sail out of the marina and into the ocean… 

They look untroubled as they hold each other on the deck, with Christen leaning back against Tobin and Tobin wrapping her arms around Christen.

Tobin only moves away to take pictures of Christen once the boat drops anchor. And she only stops after Christen says something to the skipper.

_ What did he say, my love? _ Tobin asks.  _ I didn’t catch it. _

_ He asked if he should bring out the snacks now, _ Christen answers. 

_ Like sour patch kids? _

_ You’ll find yours in my bag, sweetheart, _ Christen smiles.

_ That’s not what he asked about, wasn’t it? _

_ Would you like to try a Vouvray? _

_ The one that tastes like champagne? _

Christen nods.

_ Paired with? _

_ Pâté on toast. _

_ Oh, good, _ Tobin looks relieved.  _ Can you develop a phobia for champagne, cheese, and crackers? _ She chuckles a little.

But Christen isn’t even giggling a little,  _ I’m sorry. _

_ Wait. Did you want to have a serious talk? _

Christen shakes her head.

_ Chris…  _

Christen hesitates but nods her head.

And Tobin quickly sits beside her again.

_ Don’t you want to talk? _ Christen asks.

_ You know me, _ Tobin shrugs,  _ I like… going with the flow. But what do you want to talk about, my love? _

_ Expectations? _

_ Expectations? _ Tobin repeats, not quite getting it.

_ What will you ask of me while we’re away from each other? _

_ The answer to when do I get to see you again is the most important. _

_ That may be the hardest to swallow. _

_ Because? _

_ I’m lucky if I get to go home on Thanksgiving but I’m only ever sure to be home by Christmas morning. _

Tobin stops her face from reacting,  _ Well, I’m already saving up to see you. Although… I’m not sure when—I’ll have to ask Lauren to help me with the math. _

_ I could fly you out. _

_ I’d rather earn it. _

_ But— _

_ Chris. _

They both sigh their frustration and stay silent for a while.

_ Can you please consider it if it means we’ll get to see each other again sooner? _ Christen pleads.

Tobin sighs again before relenting,  _ Okay, I’ll consider it. _

_ Thank you. That’s all I ask. _

They stay silent for longer and take in the view of Los Angeles from the Pacific Ocean.

The sun isn’t setting yet.

They turn to each other at the same time and purposely hold each other’s hand. Then Tobin kisses the back of Christen’s hand and Christen kisses Tobin’s cheek before resting her head on Tobin’s shoulder. And they both sigh… 

_ Minimum girlfriend privilege… requirement? _ Christen asks.

_ Daily texts? _ Tobin answers.

Christen nods in agreement.

_ What about FaceTime? _ Tobin asks.

_ Every time we could? Maybe a day’s notice? _

_ I’d love that. _

_ My schedule is really erratic, my love. _

_ I remember that, my love. _

_ Can we talk about scheduling specifics once I’m back in Sweden? _

_ When will you be back in Sweden? _

_ After Valentine’s Day, I think. _

_ Okay. _

_ Okay. _

There’s so much more they want to say.

*

Eight hundred words down but Tobin can’t seem to continue her assigned article that Monday. 

She only needs a few more hundred words and she’ll be done but she’s been staring at her screen for God knows how long, sitting cross-legged on the Presses’ L-shaped couch on the second floor, with her laptop on her lap. And she’s starting to get annoyed.

Christen must have sensed this because she gets up from her lying position on the couch and asks,  _ Would you like to take a walk with Morena and me? _

Tobin’s face lights up.

_ I’ll take that as a yes, _ Christen giggles.

And Tobin puckers her lips to ask for a kiss, which Christen immediately gives.

She adds more for good measure before going to her room, beaming,  _ I’ll go get sweaters. _

*

Seven articles of Christen’s clothing on hangers seem to have found a home in Tobin’s closet. (And who knows how many more are folded in the drawers.)

Tobin can only stare at them that Tuesday morning as she stands there, wrapped in a towel, fresh from the shower.

She doesn’t understand how something so innocuous can trigger the lump in her throat and the tears in her eyes as she prepares to go to work.

Will Christen take these with her? Or will she leave them there?

Tobin doesn’t know if she prefers one over the other.

She will feel it either way.

*

Six packages in on Wednesday morning and Tobin doesn’t know if she should laugh or cry. The next package she needs to load is for Channing. 

She knows it’s one of the last ones, if not the last one she’ll deliver before Channing leaves for India to study for three months to become a Vedic meditation teacher. Or is it guru? Tobin is not really sure.

She is also unsure if Christen will be at their house to accept the package on Channing’s behalf like she used to.

Tobin is sure it will sting either way.

*

5:15pm on Thursday and Tobin is running towards Christen’s car in the parking lot.

To her surprise, Christen gets out of the car. (Something she hasn’t done in a while.)

And Tobin runs to her with open arms as Christen giggles and waits with open arms. And Tobin almost tackles her back through the car door.

They linger in their embrace, both closing their eyes and kissing whatever part they can kiss, until they pull away, just far enough, to kiss.

_ Would you drive us home? _ Christen asks.

And Tobin nods with a teasing smile,  _ Anything for you, my lady. _

Christen snorts,  _ That’s so cheesy. _

Tobin grins,  _ But you like it. _

_ Must be a side effect of loving you. _

_ Who’s cheesy now? _

_ Shut up and take me home. _

*

Four plates left to rinse then they can hold each other properly that Friday night.

Christen is clinging to Tobin from behind as Tobin washes the dishes and Tobin hasn’t stopped smiling since Christen picked her up then prepared a candlelit dinner at home.

Tobin is intent on showing Christen her appreciation as soon as she could.

*

Three consecutive orgasms later and they’re laughing so hard that Saturday night.

And when their laughter dies down, they look at each other and Tobin smirks,  _ Achievement unlocked. _

And they burst into laughter again.

*

Two more rounds and they start crying (openly) on Sunday.

*

One hour and a half before Christen’s flight and the Press Pack, plus Tobin, wait for Christen to complete her curbside check-in and stand far enough from the door to the pre-departure area to avoid blocking any passengers.

Tobin is doing her best to pull herself together as she stares at Christen from afar. She looks beautiful even in a simple hoodie and jean jacket combo, with her hair down, salon-treated and straightened out.

She smiles at Tobin before saying thanks to the check-in staff and walking back towards them.

When she’s near enough, she asks, “Did you take a peek at the line through security?”

Stacy answers, “We did, honey. And it’s quite long. You better get inside.”

Christen nods at her mom before turning to Tobin,  _ I’ve got to go, sweetheart. _

Tobin nods.

Christen hugs her mom first. And Stacy must be telling her something because Christen nods a few times.

Then she hugs Cody and laughs before hugging Channing and Fran.

Finally, she kisses Tobin on the cheek and hugs her.

And they hold themselves together as they hold each other closer… tighter… longer… 

They know they need to pull away… and then they do.

_ I’ll see you soon, my love, _ Christen smiles weakly.

Tobin tries to smile back but ends in a grimace as she struggles to keep herself in check.

Christen cradles her face with one hand.

And Tobin breaks into sobs,  _ I’m sorry… my love… I was… doing… so well… I thought… I thought I’d make it… without crying… in front… of you… again. _

Then Christen starts crying and holds Tobin again. And now, they’re both a blubbering mess.

Tobin can feel different sets of hands trying to comfort both of them. Then she feels Christen nodding… then finally pulling away.

Christen cups her face and starts caressing her jawline then breathing in and out as if she’s wordlessly asking Tobin to do the same. And she does… 

“I love you, Tobin.”

_ I love you, Chris. _

*

Cody puts an arm around Tobin’s shoulders while they walk back to his car in the parking lot and pulls her closer to him before tapping her on the shoulder.

She looks at him.

And then he asks, “Want some ice cream?”

Tobin laughs. And then she nods with a grateful smile.

*

When Cody pulls up in front of Tobin’s apartment, Stacy gets out of the car to give her a hug then tells her, “The first night away has always been the hardest for Christen… If she sends you a message but doesn’t chat with you or call you, don’t take it to heart, okay?”

Tobin nods and signs,  _ Thank you. _

*

[Christen]  
_ Boarding now my love  
_ _ I miss you I miss you I miss you   
_ _ I miss you I miss you I miss you   
_ _ I miss you _

[Tobin]  
_ I miss youuuuuuuuuuu  
_ _ I miss youuuuuuuuuuuuu  
_ _ Safe travels my love  
_ _ Please let me know when   
_ _ you land _

*

[Christen]  
_ Landed safely in Texas my love _

[Tobin]  
_ So glad you’re safe my love  
_ _ I love you  _

*

Tobin’s phone vibrates again five hours later. And it’s a FaceTime call from Christen. Tobin quickly accepts and she’s taken aback when the screen reveals a crying Christen before she can even place her phone on a stand on her desk.

_ Sweetheart, _ Tobin signs before reaching out to the camera as if touching Christen’s face, with tears forming in her eyes.

_ I’m so sorry, _ Christen signs.  _ The first night is always the hardest. _

_ I know, my love. Your mom told me. _

_ She did? _

Tobin nods and they both laugh.

_ I didn’t want to call… I didn’t want you to see me like this again. But I can’t help it. I just want to see you. _

Tobin smiles,  _ I’m so glad you called. _

_ I’m so glad I called. _

_ Do you still love me in Texas? _

_ Baby, I love you everywhere. _

*

  
  
  



	6. Only a matter of time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apparently, there are more details to this story than I had anticipated so I'll have to add another chapter lol What was supposed to be chapter 5 will now be chapters 5, 6 & 7.
> 
> Thanks to Heath17_KO5 for reading (this chapter) every thousand words ;)
> 
> And thanks to you for sticking around.
> 
> In a similar fashion to the poem Christen posted in her Instagram story: stay home, read fics, write fics, make art, enjoy art. in all forms. keep loving. stay safe.

_ “It’s okay… It’s okay…” _

Tobin accidentally clicks on her laptop, pausing the video, then quickly presses play.

_ “…It’s okay… It’s okay…” _

_ Finn keeps repeating as he holds a crying Quinn in front of the lockers in the hallway, as Rachel sadly looks on a few feet away. _

_ “Everything's gonna be okay.” _

It’s 1am and Tobin is watching episode 7 of Glee in bed.

_ Quinn and Rachel suddenly appear on stage and Rachel starts to sing, “You’re not alone… Together we stand…” _

Tobin can’t believe she’s getting more and more affected by this darn episode by the second.

_ Then it’s Finn's turn to sing, “When it gets cold… and it feels like the end…” _

Tobin is wearing her headphones with the volume turned up so she can feel the music. 

And soon, she starts sniffling… carelessly wiping snot from her nose with her finger… 

_ “No, I won’t give in…” _

She won’t admit it, but deep inside she’s lamenting, _ Quinn, bb!!! _

_ “Keeeeeeep holding on…” _

*

_ You didn’t sleep much, did you? _ Lauren asks when she catches Tobin drinking coffee in the kitchen (something that hasn’t happened in a long time, which means Tobin is running late and doesn’t seem to care).

Tobin shrugs, _ I tried sleeping. But I couldn’t. So I watched Glee. _

_ Seriously? _

_ It was better than thinking and not seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. _

_ Want to know what I think? _ Lauren offers.

_ Hit me. _

_ I think US Soccer would be stupid not to get Christen by next year. _

_ So you’re saying I only need to suffer for one year? _

_ I’m saying you might only have to endure being so far apart for one year. _

Tobin sniggers, _ You used ‘endure.’ _

_ And? _

_ Nothing. Chris and I talked about that, _ Tobin smiles ruefully. _ Thanks for reminding me. _

_ You’re welcome? _

Tobin laughs joylessly… then sighs, _ You really think they’ll get her then? _

Lauren nods, _ They need another forward for the World Cup. _

_ Isn’t that this year? _

_ The Men’s World Cup is this year. The Women’s World Cup is next year. _

_ Oh. There’s a Women’s World Cup? _

Lauren rolls her eyes, _ You seriously need to start watching the women’s game. _

_ Okay, okay, I will… Chris mentioned she’ll sub in for their upcoming games. _

_ I’ll look it up so we can watch them. _

_ Thanks. _

They stop talking for a moment, with Lauren taking a sip (or two) of coffee and Tobin staring into nothing.

Then it’s Lauren’s turn to sigh, _ Look… I get why you’re sad. It’s okay to be sad. It’s okay to mope around for a couple days. But… life goes on, Tobin. _

_ It does go on… It’s also unfair. _

_ If that were true, then why did life bring Christen to you? _

Lauren’s question feels like a slap in the face and Tobin quickly comes to her senses, _ You’re right… You’re right. _

_ Of course, I’m right. _

_ I love her, Lauren. _

_ And she loves you. _

A dopey smile appears on Tobin’s face, _ She does. _

_ Now there’s the lovesick fool I’m used to. _

Tobin rolls her eyes, still smiling.

_ Okay, come on, let’s move this party to the dining table. We’ve got work to do. _

Tobin gives her a quizzical look.

_ Did you know that Christen has Instagram? _

*

What starts out innocently as Lauren’s way of convincing Tobin to be active on social media (for Tobin’s benefit) turns into a cause of frustration.

Tobin waits and waits for her password reset link after entering her username, as they go through almost two years worth of Christen’s Instagram posts, but it never comes.

She tries again by entering her two email addresses but no users can be found with either email and she can only scowl in disbelief.

They consider creating a new account but, after Lauren checks Tobin’s sisters’ posts (where they tag Tobin) and confirms that Tobin’s username is tobinheath, they decide against it. It would be best to keep that username. 

Tobin has no choice but to ask for her login from her sisters. But when she’s done loading her van, she still hasn’t received a reply from either one.

Now it’s all she can think about while she’s stuck in a horrible traffic jam where she can only move her van by a foot every couple of minutes.

Well, that’s not true. She’s also thinking about two women featured in a couple of Christen’s old posts: the Spaniard she is sure is Christen’s ex and one of two Swedes she thinks could be the other ex.

After driving forward by a foot again, she inspects her body and starts flexing her biceps. She squeezes one with her free hand and her eyebrows rise in appreciation. She thinks they’re not bad at all. She’d even go so far as to say Christen loves her arms.

Her calves on the other hand are a nightmare. Others may have told her that they envy them. But they’re just… huge… which can be so… inconvenient. With socks. Skinny jeans. Leggings. A whole lot of other stuff. Ugh. She stops looking at her calves, straightens her back, and touches her stomach, then slumps back into her seat.

She knows she can’t hold a candle to these professional athletes when it comes to abs (probably). And stamina (for sure). And just… overall awesomeness.

She sighs and moves the van by another foot, wishing she could get her phone from the back of her van to check for messages.

*

[Perry]  
_ Please tell me you don’t plan   
_ _ to login just to Instagram stalk   
_ _ your girlfriend   
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ What? No!!!!!  
_ *  
[Perry]  
_ Oh sure  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ Fine  
_ _ But that’s only partly true  
_ _ I also want to post for her!  
_ _ Do you have my login?  
_ _ Pretty please  
_ *  
[Perry]  
_ It has one of my email adds  
_ _ Not yours   
_ _ You’d have to call before I   
_ _ change it :P  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ *loudly crying face emoji*  
_ _ *  
_ _ Will you still be awake by   
_ _ 10pm EST? _

*

It’s almost 8pm Pacific / 10pm Central / 11pm Eastern time, when Tobin sees an all-important message sent an hour ago.

[Christen]  
_ Babe are you home yet?  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ I’m so sorry my love I woke up   
_ _ so late but didn’t hurry and then   
_ _ I got into a horrible traffic jam   
_ _ because there was an accident   
_ _ and I got so delayed  
_ _ I just got back to the hub :( _

She stares at her phone for about 20 minutes, wishing and hoping and waiting and praying for her message status to change from delivered to read and for the dots to appear… 

But they don’t. 

She sighs for the nth time and trudges over to the bus stop.

*

Tobin continues to stare at her phone when she gets home… She stares while changing out of her uniform and into a pair of boxer shorts and… one of Christen’s old t-shirts… She stares while clutching the shirt against her chest… before finally putting it on… 

She stares while eating dinner… watching TV… brushing her teeth… after plunking down on her bed.

She stares until tears start to form in her eyes but stubbornly refuse to fall.

She sniffles as she looks at the time.

It’s 11:11pm. And Tobin knows that, no matter how hard she wishes it were otherwise, Christen is already fast asleep and isn't going to message her again tonight.

Tobin also knows that it’s her fault. She should’ve tried her darndest to go to sleep. She shouldn’t have watched Glee. She shouldn’t have wallowed in—dang it, she’s wallowing again.

She needs to get a decent sleep tonight. The breathing exercise might work. She’ll definitely try. She needs to do better. And she needs to make it up to Christen.

The thought makes her sit all of a sudden.

She can make it up to Christen.

She grabs her phone, brings it to her desk, and props it up on its stand.

She opens Messages then Christen’s thread, clicks on Camera, and swipes right to change it into video.

Wait.

How long a video can she send?

She googles it quickly and breathes a sigh of relief. Three and a half minutes is more than enough time.

She flips the camera and—ugh—she shouldn’t be surprised at how awful she looks.

There’s no use trying to mask the sadness in her eyes but she can at least fix her hair, which she does and—ooh, glasses!

Much better.

She thinks of what to say next… then takes a deep breath and clicks on the record button with a soft smile on her face.

_ Hi, my love… I’m so sorry I missed you today… _

*

Five hours of sleep isn’t much but the quality of Tobin’s sleep today is so much better than yesterday that she wakes up before 5am with ease.

She immediately glances at her phone on the nightstand.

It’s not even 7am in Texas and, on a regular day, Tobin knows that Christen prefers to wake up after 8am.

Tobin checks her phone anyway and her heart soars when she spots Christen’s beautiful smiling face in the preview on lock screen.

She quickly opens it and beams at the video.

It’s a close-up of Christen lying sideways in her hotel bed, looking sleepy but surprisingly happy (without coffee), “Goob morning, my love… You didn’t shower last night, did you?” Christen giggles, “Hope you’ll have a better day today, sweetheart… Drive safe… Get home safe… Talk to you later… I haven’t had coffee… (See!) I can still get two more hours of sleep… Come back to bed and give me a kiss before you leave for work… I love you…” Christen’s smile lasts two more seconds before the video ends.

And Tobin allows herself to rewatch the video two more times before going to the bathroom and taking a shower… putting on her uniform and fixing her hair… drinking coffee and eating cereal… brushing her teeth… then sending Christen another video, where Tobin places her phone on a pillow and leans down with a smile to give the camera a kiss.

She knows the sooner she can finish her work today, the sooner she can talk to Christen. And that’s all the motivation she needs.

*

Tobin returns to the hub a little after 4pm Pacific / 6pm Central / 7pm Eastern time, with a text from Christen (sent a couple of minutes earlier) waiting for her.

[Christen]  
_ We’re about to have dinner   
_ _ my love  
_ _ Hope you’ll be free to call in   
_ _ 2 hours   
_ _ Get home safe :* :* :* _

With a smile, Tobin sits cross-legged on the floor in the locker room and makes a FaceTime call with her phone propped up against the wall.

Her sister Perry smirks at her in greeting, _ I never thought I’d see the day when my little sister finally uses the social media account we created for her. _

Tobin playfully rolls her eyes, _ Can you please change the email to my gmail? _

_ Will you really post on Instagram? _

_ Yes. _

_ To keep in touch with Christen? _

_ Yes. _

_ And your family? _

_ Yes! _

_ Wow… Whose brilliant idea was this? _

_ Lauren’s. _

Perry laughs, _ Of course! How is she, by the way? _

_ She’s happy and stable as always. Her boyfriend will surely get drafted in the NBA this year. _

_ Oh, gosh. You’re both seriously dating— _

_ Professional athletes, I know. _

_ And how’s Christen? _

_ I haven’t really spoken to her since Monday. But, _ Tobin perks up, _ she sent me a video this morning. She looks pretty… and happy… _

Perry gives her a meaningful smile, _ How are you holding up? _

Tobin narrows her eyes, _ That’s the real reason you want me to call, isn’t it? _

Perry chuckles.

_ Did mom put you up to this? _ Tobin asks.

Perry gives her a kind smile, _ Everyone knows long distance relationships are hard, Tobin. _

_ And? _

_ We just want to know how you are. We’re getting more updates from Christen than you since Christmas. _

_ You text with her? _

_ Of course! She’s really great, by the way. _

Tobin gives her a soft smile, _ She is. _

_ Do you see yourself having a future with her? _

_ I want to have a future with her. _

_ But? _

Tobin sighs, _ I don’t know what my future will be. She has, like, a 10-year career plan. I have a decent job. But I just… I want to be more for her. _

_ She seems to love you just the way you are. _

_ She does, _ Tobin smiles. _ She told me. _

_ So what kind of ‘more’ do you want? _

_ I don’t know… I just want her to be proud of me the same way I will surely be proud of her and what she can accomplish in her sport. _

_ Are you thinking about feature writing again? _

_ Maybe. _

_ Then maybe you should start sending applications, _ Perry suggests.

_ Where, though? I don’t know where Christen will play when she comes back. _

_ There can’t be that many teams to play for, can there? _ Perry asks. _ And who’s to say Christen won’t choose the city where you’ll be. _

That makes Tobin pause, _ I don’t—I’ll check where the teams are. _

_ Okay, good… Is she worth it? _

Tobin smiles again, _ She’s worth it… and more. _

Perry smiles back, _ Then don’t let her go. _

_ I’m not letting her go. _

_ Okay, I’ll report back to mom that you’re doing okay. _

_ Thanks. _

_ Don’t be a stranger, little sis. _

_ Please change the email! _

_ Okay, okay! I’ll change it as soon as we get off the phone. _

_ Thanks, Pear. _

_ Love you, Tobs. _

_ Love you. Bye. _

Perry waves goodbye. 

Tobin ends the call with a hopeful smile, takes a deep breath, and waits.

[Perry]  
_ Done  
_ _ You better start posting soon _

Tobin chuckles and goes home.

*

[Christen]  
_ Babe did you really just slide into   
_ _ my DMs? _

Christen sends a screenshot of Tobin’s DM that says, _ ‘Are you a carbon sample? Because I want to date you.’ _

[Tobin]  
_ That’s meeeeeee  
_ _ *grinning face with smiling eyes emoji*  
_ _ Your dork _

[Christen]  
_ :D :D :D  
_ _ My dork I love you I love you   
_ _ I love you I love you  
_ _ Okay following you now  
_ _ Are you already following me? _

[Tobin]  
_ Following you now my love  
_ _ Wanted to slide into your DMs   
_ _ first ;)  
_ _ I love youuuuuuuuuu  
_ _ I’m home btw _

[Christen]  
_ Talk to you in a couple of   
_ _ minutes!!! :* :* :*  
_ _ *  
_ _ Oh great now they all want to   
_ _ follow you   
_ _ *  
_ _ And now they’re complaining   
_ _ why you haven’t posted   
_ _ anything _

[Tobin]  
_ :D :D :D  
_ _ As long as you’re not   
_ _ complaining… _

[Christen]  
_ Oh I’m not  
_ _ I know that you’ll be posting   
_ _ for me!! <3 _

[Tobin]  
_ ( *3* ) ( *3* ) ( *3* ) _

*

So stupid.

They’ve been smiling so stupidly at each other and giving each other so many air kisses over FaceTime for a few minutes now that it makes Christen’s current designated roommate, Becky, smile and shake her head when she passes by.

Christen gives her a quick wave before turning back to Tobin.

_ Becky left? _ Tobin asks.

_ Yes. _

_ You’re all alone now? _

Christen looks amused, _ Yes. _

_ Wanna try FaceTime sex? _ Tobin grins.

And Christen laughs so hard, _ I knew it! I knew you were gonna say that. _

They both laugh… and naturally go back to smiling stupidly at each other.

_ Do you really want to try it? _ Christen asks.

_ Maybe when we’re really horny, _ Tobin supposes, _ which is only a matter of time. _

They laugh again before Christen admits, _ I can’t wrap my head around it, to be honest. Like the… logistics of it. _

_ Isn’t there, like, a phone holder for lazy people? That could work. _

_ So you’ve thought about it? _

Tobin shrugs, _ I have but… can’t compare to the real thing… _

They both sigh… 

_ I miss you. _

_ I miss you. _

They ask about each other’s day and talk until they both need to sleep.

*

Tobin starts their new routine the next day. 

She sends good morning videos while Christen sends midday videos. Then, at night before they go to sleep, they talk over FaceTime about their day and other stuff.

_ Where does Becky play? _ Tobin asks.

_ She plays in Kansas City. _

_ There’s a team in Kansas City but no team in LA? _

Christen sighs, _ I know right… _

_ Where are the other teams? _

_ The other eight teams are in Portland, as you know… then Seattle… Houston, which is the newest team… Chicago… Washington, DC… Boston… Buffalo, New York… and Harrison, New Jersey. _

Tobin looks hopeful as she asks, _ There’s a team in Jersey? _

Christen sighs again, _ My love. _

_ Yes, my love. _

_ Let’s not get our hopes up. _

_ But, _ Tobin smiles and reminds her, _ vibrate as if it is, my love. _

And Christen can’t help but smile back.

*

_ Sweetheart, it’s game day tomorrow, _ Christen reminds Tobin the next night.

_ I remember, my love, because I’m so excited! _ Tobin grins.

Christen giggles and grins back, _ You’ll watch? _

_ Yes, yes, Lauren already checked the channel and stuff. I will see you on TV!!! _

Christen giggles again, looking absolutely tickled, _ You sure you’ll be able to catch it? _

_ Yes, I’m sure! I’m so glad it’s on a Saturday. And I have a one-hour cushion, right? Because you’ll sub in? _

_ An hour and 30 minutes maybe… _

_ Then I’m absolutely sure I’ll make it, my love. I can’t wait! _

*

_ Wow… Ali is awesome! _Tobin enthuses after witnessing two awesome crosses from Ali. 

(She catches the 42nd minute of the first half the next night and immediately plops down on the couch beside Lauren, who immediately hands Tobin a bowl of popcorn to snack on.)

Lauren laughs at the expression on Tobin’s face, _ I can’t wait to see how you’ll react when Christen comes on. _

Tobin chuckles, _ It’s just the two of us. I can be as embarrassing as I want to be. _

_ Not if I record it on video. _

_ You wouldn’t dare! _

_ I bet Christen will love it. _

_ Oh… Dang. You’re right again. _

Lauren laughs some more.  
*  
She excitedly slaps Tobin’s thigh three times in the 71st minute, _ They’re saying Christen is taking her jacket off! _

Tobin immediately stands up in excitement, with her fingers interlaced on top of her head.

Seconds later, Christen appears on screen, chatting animatedly with a trainer on the sideline, wearing an orange pinnie, with her hair up in a ponytail.

_ Oh, God! _ Tobin immediately moves closer to the TV, with a huge grin on her face. _ Lauren, she’s so pretty! _

The play soon stops because Whitney is cramping, then Christen appears for a split second again, talking to her coach, and Tobin can’t help but touch the screen before turning back to Lauren, looking absolutely ecstatic, _ Can you believe this?! My girlfriend is on TV and she looks so darn good! _

Lauren just laughs heartily, _ Get away from the TV, Tobin! I can’t see! _

Tobin retreats a little but doesn’t go too far because Christen shows up again, walking towards the spot where she’ll enter the pitch. The camera lingers on her back, with her last name and her number (23) prominently on display, and Tobin can’t contain her excitement, _ Oh, my God… Oh, my God. Oh, my God, I get to see her play. _

Lauren giggles and shakes her head in amusement.

Tobin stays where she is, as if she can’t afford to sit down, _ Lord, please, please watch over her. Keep her safe. _

_ And, Lord, please, please, _ Lauren adds, _ help them score a goal now that Christen is on. _

It’s been a scoreless 74 minutes against Canada but the pace has picked up considerably since the substitutes came on for both sides.

Tobin and Lauren keep their eyes fixed on the TV screen. 

In the 78th minute, just four minutes after Christen comes on, Ali does a short throw-in to someone Tobin doesn’t recognise, who quickly gets double-teamed near the corner, so the ball goes back to Ali and is almost out of bounds but Ali manages to dribble it in the tight space before passing it off towards Heather in midfield. A Canadian player must’ve touched the ball because it bounces away from Heather a little. But out of nowhere, Becky charges through the midfield, gets the ball, doesn’t stop dribbling further towards the box, and makes eye contact with Christen, who draws defenders away from Becky, who then passes the ball to Christen, who gives it back to Becky in a perfectly weighted pass between two Canadian defenders, who start scrambling after Becky near the end line. And then the goalie is there and Pinoe is also there but the ball from Becky surprisingly sails through all that commotion into Sydney’s left foot near the far post and—goal!

Tobin and Lauren start jumping and shouting for joy.

And Tobin can’t stop raving from there on out.

_ Oh, my goodness! Becky is a beast! That was so awesome! Becky is so awesome! That was so freakin’ brilliant! And did you see that perfect pass from Christen?! Oh, my God! My girlfriend is a baller!  
_ _ *  
_ _ Look at that—the way she brought that ball down with that first touch! Oh, my goodness!  
_ _ *  
_ _ What the heck! Did she just—Oh, my gosh, I can’t wrap my head around it! She kicked the ball in mid-air backwards???  
_ _ *  
_ _ My girlfriend is a freakin’ baller, Lauren! _

She can’t help but text Christen the same thing when Lauren manages to drag her to the dining table to eat when the match ends with a 1-0 win for Team USA.

[Tobin]  
_ My girlfriend is a freakin   
_ _ baller!!!!  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ Hahahaha  
_ _ I love you too!!!! _

[Tobin]  
_ *heart eyes* *heart eyes* *heart eyes* _

[Christen]  
_ We’re on our way back to the   
_ _ hotel my love  
_ _ I’ll call you soon, okay? _

[Tobin]  
_ Okayyyyyyyy   
_ _ I love youuuuuuuuuu _

[Christen]  
_ I love you I love you  
_ _ You’ve made Ali and Becky   
_ _ very happy with the Instagram   
_ _ follow btw  
_ _ Like they’ve earned bragging   
_ _ rights and they’re now rubbing   
_ _ it in everyone else’s faces. It’s   
_ _ so funny :D :D :D _

[Tobin]  
_ :D :D :D  
_ _ Pls tell them they were both   
_ _ awesome!  
_ _ But what about you my love  
_ _ Have I made you very happy? _

[Christen]  
_ *grinning face with smiling eyes emoji*  
_ _ So grateful and blissful my   
_ _ love :* :* :* _

Tobin exudes so much joy it’s contagious.

[Tobin]  
_ I love you so much _

[Christen]  
_ I love you so much  
_ *  
When Tobin’s phone vibrates a while later with a FaceTime call from Christen, Lauren quickly waves her over, _ Let me congratulate Christen first. _

Tobin pouts but moves next to Lauren when she accepts the call.

Lauren takes the phone from her, “Congrats, Chris!”

Christen is all smiles, “Thanks, Lauren!”

“I have to warn you. You’ve got yourself a fangirl.”

_ Correction! _ Tobin interjects, _ I’m a fangirlfriend! _

Christen laughs.

“She’s gonna be insufferable, I’m telling you.”

Christen laughs some more as Tobin snatches her phone away from Lauren and almost runs to her room.

She notices the close-up of Christen’s lips giving the camera lots of kisses before she puts her phone down on its stand and sits at her desk.

Tobin narrows her eyes but is smirking, _ Were you kissing my neck? _

Christen nods adorably with a teasing smile, _ Isn’t it my prize for playing well? I was just claiming it. _

_ You can claim more than that, you know, _ Tobin teases back.

_ Is that so? _

Tobin nods eagerly, still smirking.

_ In that case… I want… your whole torso. _

Tobin raises an eyebrow, _ Are you alone? _

Christen bites her lower lip with a smile, then stands up and takes her phone.

Tobin gets up and locks her door. 

Walking back to her desk, she sees the bathroom sink behind Christen, who is sitting inside the bathtub, with her phone propped up in front of her, on one edge against the wall.

They smirk at each other as their eyes lock.

Then Tobin takes her shirt off, still standing behind her chair, and Christen bites her lower lip again. 

Their smirks turn into full-on grins.

And there’s a playful glint in Christen’s eyes when she leans closer to her phone, with her mouth open and her tongue stretched out, and licks—

Tobin laughs, with her half naked body shaking as she sits on her chair again.

Christen has a self-satisfied grin on her face, _ I’m so happy with my prize. It’s so much better than their Instagram follows. _

Tobin laughs again, _ You deserve more than this display of my half-naked body right now. _

Christen beams, _ You liked my performance that much? _

_ Honey, I always like your performance, _ Tobin waggles her eyebrows.

Christen laughs, _ Stop it. Or I’d start wanting more than this display of your half-naked body right now. _

Tobin keeps her smirk, _ You know, we can keep tabs of what we owe each other when we meet again. Then spend, like, two whole days making up for it in a—in a major, one-time payment sexgasborg! _

Christen snorts, _ Are you high? _

_ In love with you! _ Tobin grins.

Christen rolls her eyes then grins, _ I can’t believe you’ve reached a whole new level of dorkiness. _

_ Baby, I’m capable of reaching new heights because of you! _

_ And now you’ve reached a whole new level of cheesiness. _

_ See!!! _

They start laughing… and end with loving smiles.

Christen leans closer to her phone again, this time, to give Tobin a long and tender kiss…

Tobin can’t help but dreamily touch her lips… 

They gaze at each other, with their loving smiles plastered on their faces, before Christen leans in again for another kiss… 

This time, Tobin’s eyes flutter as she touches her neck… 

Christen leans closer one more time to give more lingering kisses… and Tobin closes her eyes as she touches her chest…

She meets Christen’s gaze when she opens her eyes then takes her turn… to lean closer to her phone… and give Christen a kiss… 

Christen tilts her head to one side, her eyes closing… and when they flutter open, she adjusts herself inside the tub… moving closer to her phone… and possibly kneeling… 

Tobin can see her shirt… and her arms crossing over it before she pulls it slowly off her body…

And Tobin moves on autopilot, with her eyes glued to her phone, as she gives Christen another kiss— 

Christen touches her waist.

—then another kiss—

Christen touches her rib… 

—and another kiss—

…then the swell of her breast…

—and another kiss.

…then the hollow of her throat.

Christen moves her body again until Tobin sees her beautiful face with a muted smile… an expression Tobin can’t quite place.

And they stare at each other for a while… before sighing and leaning… at the same time… 

*

_ Do you still love me in Florida? _ Tobin asks the next day.

_ I do, _ Christen smiles with a whole lot of tenderness. _ Honey, I love you everywhere. _

*

Tobin smiles after Christen recounts the team’s first full day in Florida, _ I’m so glad you had a nice recovery day, my love, _

_ Me, too, sweetheart. How was your day? _ Christen asks. _ Did you finish your article? _

_ I did… and I received news, too, which wasn’t so good. _

_ Oh, no. What was it? _

_ My editor is leaving. _

_ She is? Why? _

_ She got a new job. _

_ Where? _

_ Didn’t say… But she assured me that the assistant editor who will replace her will continue to accept my unassigned articles. She also agreed to be one of my references. _

_ One of your references? _

_ When I start applying for news jobs again. _

_ Will you be applying for news jobs again? _

Tobin nods.

_ Where? _

_ Maybe you can help me with that. _

_ How can I help? _

_ Well, you said you probably won’t play in Portland so I won’t send applications there. _

Christen perks up.

_ Should I send applications in Seattle? _

A big smile slowly forms on Christen’s face until she beams. And she keeps beaming for a little while without answering Tobin, who can’t help but start beaming back. Finally, Christen replies with, _ Pinoe will likely transfer from Lyon to Seattle this year. And they already have Sydney. _

_ So no? _

Christen nods.

_ What about Houston? _ Tobin asks.

_ I don’t like Houston, _ Christen admits sheepishly.

_ Thank goodness. Me, too. _

And they both laugh.

_ Imagine if one of us got a job in Houston… _

_ The irony. _

They laugh again.

Then Christen tells her, _ Buffalo is also out of the question, my love. They have Abby and Carli. Maybe not DC, too, even though Ali and Ash are there, because they’ve just acquired international forwards. _

_ So that leaves Kansas City, Chicago, Boston, and Jersey, which means New York City and other nearby cities are viable, too. _

Christen nods again, with an even bigger smile, _ I love you. _

_ I love you. I’m not sure what my chances are— _

_ Higher now that you have a published LA Times op-ed, my love. And you considering this already means so much. Not to mention the faith you have that I’ll end up playing for one of those teams— _

_ I have complete faith. And after watching you play, it’s really just a matter of time, my love. _

*

Tobin can’t help but sigh after they greet each other the following night, _ I know that look. I’ve seen it before. _

_ Then let me preface by saying I tried, my love. And I’m really sorry. _

_ It’s okay, my love—well, it’s not really okay, but, you know—it’s not your fault. _

Christen gives her a woeful smile and then a kiss.

_ So when is your flight back to Sweden? _

_ On the 13th, in the afternoon. _

_ The day after the second match against Russia? _

Christen nods.

_ Oh, that sucks, _ Tobin looks absolutely deflated. _ I already won’t be able to watch that game— _

_ I’m sure it’ll show up on YouTube, my love. _

_ —and now I won’t even get to… wait with you! _ Tobin briefly closes her eyes as she sighs again, in helpless frustration.

_ Hey… _ Christen tries to get Tobin’s attention back to her. _ Sweetheart… Hey… Please look at me. _

Tobin looks heartbroken when she meets Christen’s gaze.

Christen makes an effort to give her a soft, genuine smile, “I love you so much, Tobin.”

And Tobin can’t help but lean closer to her phone, with her eyes closed and her head bowed, as if asking for comfort, for Christen to hold her in her arms… 

When she sits back, she sees Christen sniffling once.

_ Please don’t forget that in the coming weeks, okay? _ Christen implores.

And Tobin nods, with a heart-rending expression on her face, _ I love you so much, Chris. _

*

Tobin tries to swap shifts the next day after her request for a day off gets denied. But all her attempts turn out fruitless.

*

_ I’m having a hard time with the time difference, my love, _ Tobin confesses that night. _ Can you help me figure it out? _

_ Well, what you need to remember is that I’ll be nine hours ahead, my love, _ Christen points out. _ Your midnight is my 9am. And when you wake up in the morning, it’s my afternoon. _

_ Oh… so… when can we FaceTime? _

_ Our best bet is when we both have the day off. But there might be days we can have a short call when you wake up and I’m not playing or training. _

Tobin sighs, _ Okay. _

*

_ Whatever happened to that Wall Street Journal interview, my love? _ Christen brings up the next night. _ You haven’t mentioned anything. _

_ Oh, did I forget to update you? _Tobin asks innocently.

Christen nods.

_ I’m sorry. It was nothing out of the ordinary, which was probably why I forgot about it. It was just an email interview… a simple profile on me. One of my co-workers took a photo of me with the van. It’ll probably be out by the end of February on their website. _

_ It won’t be in print? _

Tobin nods.

_ Okay. _

*

Christen casts an appraising look at Tobin the next night, _ I know you’re already feeling sad that I’m leaving the country soon, but… my love… _

_ Yes, my love. _

_ I’m still here. And these moments are precious, too. _

Tobin looks ashamed in an instant, _ I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to—I won’t take it for granted—I won’t take you for granted. _

_ Thank you. I promise to also not take you for granted. _

_ Thank you… I’m so sorry… I started to feel the distance these past three days… like you’re so far away… _

_ I’m never too far, my love… I’m in your heart, remember? _

Tobin gives her a soft smile, _ No, my love. _

_ No? _

_ You are my heart. _

Christen beams.

Then Tobin’s soft smile turns into a grin, _ Can you believe this? We’re so cheesy now we’ll only need champagne and crackers moving forward. _

Christen laughs, _ I guess that’s about right. You’ve always looked like a snack to me. _

And Tobin laughs.

*

_ Sweetheart, can you download WhatsApp? _ Christen requests the next night.

_ Does that have video chat? _ Tobin asks.

Christen nods.

_ Okay, I’ll do that, _ Tobin promises. _ Wait, is that for the phone or—? _

_ It’s for your phone, my love. I use a European number when I’m in Sweden. I’ll forward it to you. _

_ Okay. _

_ Do you have Skype? _

Tobin nods, _ It’s just my name. Same with my Instagram. _

_ Okay. _

_ You prefer Skype over FaceTime? _

_ Not really. I just thought… since we have laptops, maybe we don’t need phone holders for lazy people after all. _

Tobin’s face slowly breaks out into a huge grin.

And Christen grins back.

*

_ It’s game day tomorrow! _ Tobin beams in greeting the next night. _ I’m so happy it’s on a Sunday! _

Christen laughs, _ Don’t get too excited, my love. I might just come on for the last 10 minutes. _

_ I don’t care. You’ll score a goal. And it will be a banger! _

Christen laughs again.

*

[Tobin]  
_ I told you!!!  
_ _ I told you you’d score a   
_ _ banger!!!  
_ _ And you made an assist, too!  
_ _ *heart* *heart*  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ :D :D :D :* :* :*  
_ _ Ttys!!!  
_ _ Btw Pinoe won’t stop bragging   
_ _ that you’re following her now  
_ _ HAO (Heather) is nicer about   
_ _ it lol  
_ _ I love you I love you _

[Tobin]  
_ I love youuuuuuuuu  
_ *  
_ You can just score whenever you want, can’t you? _ Tobin beams in their FaceTime call once Christen is back in her hotel room after the game.

_ Oh, I don’t know, _ Christen plays coy. _ I want to score right now but… can I? _

Tobin smirks, _ Are you alone? _

Christen smirks back then rushes to the bathroom with her phone again while Tobin rushes to lock her door again.

She takes her shirt off when she walks back to her desk and Christen seems to be standing up, which means her phone must be on the sink.

Tobin smiles expectantly, _ Your shirt, too. _

Christen smiles sweetly, _ Your shorts first. _

Tobin playfully wiggles out of her shorts, which makes Christen laugh then sign, _ Honey, give me legs. _

So Tobin places her left foot on the chair, then, with a teasing smirk and a quirked eyebrow, runs both hands slowly, exaggeratedly, from her ankle to her thigh.

Christen laughs some more, spelling out, _ Yum. _

And Tobin laughs before pointing her index finger at Christen, telling her that it’s her turn.

So Christen steps away from the sink then takes her shirt off.

Then Tobin points her finger downward.

And Christen smirks again before getting rid of her leggings.

Then Tobin rotates her finger, asking Christen to turn around. 

And she does.

She takes a deep breath before twisting her upper body to glance at Tobin and her phone, then slides the tie off her hair, shakes her head to loosen it, and threads her fingers through it, before turning her head again and fixing Tobin with a level gaze.

Tobin can hardly breathe.

Neither of them attempt to move for a little while. And they just stare at each other, eyes filled with longing and uncertainty in equal parts.

Tobin decides to leave it all up to Christen.

And Christen decides to continue playing coy, asking, _ Had your fill? _

So Tobin decides to go back to playing cute.

She leans back in her seat a little, with her arms outstretched towards her phone and her hands opening and closing as if… squeezing.

And they both laugh.

*

_ Do you still love me in Georgia? _

_ I love you everywhere, sweetheart. _

*

_ Have my parents invited you to Sunday dinner? _Christen asks the next night, two nights before game day.

_ Yes, they have, sweetheart, _ Tobin answers.

_ Are you going? _

Tobin squirms… then shrugs.

Christen tilts her head a little as she studies Tobin’s face, _ They’d be happy to have you over, my love… And besides… I’d still be asleep then. _

Tobin sighs, _ Okay. I’ll go. _

*

Tobin absently runs her left hand up and down her right arm the next night, with a crooked smile on her face, as she watches Christen sign animatedly about her day… 

Then Christen suddenly stops, _ What? _

_ Nothing. _

_ My love… _Christen prompts.

There’s undeniable yearning in Tobin’s eyes, _ I’m so in love with you… _

*

Tobin isn’t really surprised to receive texts, with a photo, from Christen so early in the morning on game day just before she finishes loading her van. But it still makes her smile so wide it hurts.

[Christen]  
_ I’m so happy!!  
_ _ Thank you so much for making   
_ _ my day, my love  
_ _ I love you I love you I love you _

Tobin knows she’s staring at the photo for far too long but she can’t get enough. She can’t get enough of looking at Christen, grinning from ear to ear as she holds a gorgeous bouquet of roses in her right arm and three types of phone holders (of different colors) in her left. She can’t get enough of Christen looking so joyful that she can’t help but call.

She calls and doesn’t take her eyes off the screen as the word ‘FaceTime…’ appears just below *heart* *heart,* telling her that it’s trying to connect.

And she waits… and waits… and waits… and waits… until a new word appears next to ‘FaceTime…’

‘Unavailable.’

She sighs and settles for a text reply.

[Tobin]  
_ In this house, we stan game   
_ _ days over valentines day  
_ _ Lol I’m kidding! I hope we’ll get   
_ _ to celebrate valentines in the   
_ _ coming years and not just game   
_ _ days, my love  
_ _ I love youuuuuuuuuuuu  
_ _ I love youuuuuuuuuuuuuu  
_ _ I’m so happy to have made your   
_ _ day and made you smile like that  
_ _ Happy game day babe!  
_ _ *countless heart kiss emojis* _

This will have to do, she tells herself.

This will have to do for now.  
*  
[Christen]  
_ Noooooooo  
_ _ I missed your call because I   
_ _ waited for my smoothie at   
_ _ breakfast??!! *loudly crying   
_ _ face emojis*  
_ _ I love you I love you  
_ _ Please drive safe my love  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ *more heart kiss emojis*  
_ _ I love youuuuuuuuu  
_ _ Score a goal for meeeee _

*

_ Two goals?! You scored two goals and I missed it?! _Tobin exclaims before pouting and bouncing in her chair like a petulant child that night.

_ The first one was even a header, _ Christen boasts with a sweet smile.

_ You told me you don’t like headers. _

_ But I couldn’t say no to Carli’s wonderful cross—she delivered the ball on a silver platter. _

_ And the second one? _

_ A poacher’s goal. Ali’s shot from outside the box ricocheted off a defender’s leg and landed on my foot. _

_ Aw, man, _ Tobin grumbles.

_ The full match will be posted on US Soccer’s YouTube channel, my love. _

Tobin pouts harder, _ Not the same… _

Christen looks on with amused adoration, _ You and Sydney should start a pout club. _

_ A pout club? _

_ She was so disappointed to know you weren’t able to watch when she thought she did a good enough job to warrant an Instagram follow. _

_ Did she? _

_ Knowing you, you’ll probably end up following Carli, _ Christen laughs. _ But yes, Sydney was great. And her goal was so ridiculous she ended up eating grass. _

_ Ridiculous? How? _

_ It was at an almost impossible angle, inches from the end line. You’ll have to see it for yourself. _

_ Okay, I’m intrigued. _

_ And feeling less pouty? _

_ No. _

Christen laughs again, _ My love? _

_ Yes, my love. _

_ Did you really mean what you texted this morning about celebrating Valentine’s Day? _

_ Don’t you want to? I didn’t mean like… a big thing. I just thought it’s a good excuse for a date night or a… date brunch if that’s… more… your thing… for… Valentine’s Day… _Tobin trails off because of the way Christen is smiling.

_ Actually, I was thinking more about the ‘coming years’ part. _

_ Oh. _

They don’t sign anything for a while. And Christen’s smile starts to dim as Tobin turns paler by the second before visibly… gulping.

_ Chris… _

Christen now has an unreadable expression on her face. And it takes a moment before she replies, _ Yes, my love. _

_ I want to be with you. _

_ For how long? _

_ For… a lifetime, maybe? Hopefully? _

Christen looks stunned.

And Tobin can’t stop herself from rambling, _ I’m not proposing or anything. I know it’s too early for that. Doesn't mean I haven’t fantasized about it though, just so you know—why did I just tell you that? _

Christen starts smiling again.

And Tobin keeps going, _ What I really want to tell you is that I’m in this for the long haul, Chris. We’ve mentioned Christmas and our first year anniversary like we’re so sure we’ll stay together this whole year no matter what. But… I would love to have years with you. _

Christen looks radiant when she signs, _ You’re cute. Can I follow you home? ‘Cause my parents always told me to follow my dreams. _

Tobin laughs, _ I love you. _

Christen smiles at her lovingly, _ I love you. I’d love to have years with you. And I’m hoping for a lifetime, too. _

_ You are? _

Christen nods, _ I am yours, remember? _

Tobin beams, _ As I am yours, _ then sighs, _ I wish I could kiss and hold you right now. _

_ Me too, _ Christen sighs just as wistfully. _ Can we switch to Skype? _

Tobin raises an eyebrow, _ Are you propositioning me? _

Christen laughs, _ I wish I were… Can we go to bed, my love? _

Tobin’s eyes brighten in understanding then nods eagerly. 

So they both get their laptops and they both go on Skype while they both stay on FaceTime.

And as soon as Christen contacts her on Skype, Tobin laughs, spelling out, _ Brownsugah? As in super hot woman or wifey material? _

Christen smirks, _ You tell me. _

_ Oh, both. Most definitely. Without a doubt, _ Tobin smirks back.

And Christen laughs again before they end their FaceTime call, turn out the lights, and bring their laptops to bed, with Tobin’s laptop to her left and Christen’s laptop to her right.

Then they lie on their sides, facing each other, and smile and stare at each other, give each other air kisses every now and then, and chat about random things… until Christen falls asleep.

Tobin stays awake to watch her sleep… until the call drops on its own and the lump forms in her throat.

*

The first thing Tobin does when she wakes up the next morning is text Christen.

[Tobin]  
_ My love, can I call? _

She knows Christen is still asleep. But she can’t help but check her phone every couple of minutes while getting ready for work… then commuting to work… then at work… 

[Tobin]  
_ I really hope I can call before   
_ _ driving out of the hub  
_ _ *  
_ _ I love you  
_ _ *  
_ _ Please please wake up soon  
_ _ *  
_ _ I want to wish you a safe trip  
_ _ *  
_ _ ‘I want to say goodbye properly,’ _ is what she types next but deletes it and continues loading her van distractedly until the last package.

When she’s done, she closes the back of her van, sits on the rear bumper, and sighs as she stares at her phone.

[Tobin]  
_ Done loading the van my love   
_ _ I’ll wait for you before I leave   
_ _ the hub _

She doesn’t sit still for long.

She starts tapping her foot.

And when she notices what she’s doing, she abruptly stands up and starts pacing back and forth.

A coworker waves at her, then asks if she’s okay with a thumbs up and a questioning look.

She replies with a thumbs up and a nod. Then she feels her phone vibrating, shows her phone, points at it, and smiles at her coworker, who nods and smiles back in understanding.

Then she quickly accepts the call, places the phone on the rear bumper, and squats in front of it.

_ My love, _Christen greets her with a soft smile, still looking sleepy.

_ My love, _Tobin smiles just as softly.

_ Did you just want to say goodbye? _

_ And I love you. _

_ I love you, _ Christen smiles a little bit brighter before the smile disappears gradually. _ Can you promise me something? _

_ Anything. _

_ Can you please concentrate on driving and not think of me while you’re driving and just… drive very, very carefully? _ Christen starts to crack, with her lips quivering a little. _ I don’t want anything to happen to you… Can you please be safe all the time? _

Tobin takes a deep, shaky breath and nods, _ Okay. _

_ Promise me. _

_ I promise. _

*

Tobin sees the text she’s been waiting for mid afternoon just when she’s about to take a package for one of her regular customers from the back of her van.

[Christen]  
_ Boarding now my love  
_ _ I love you I love you I love you  
_ _ I love you _

True to her word, she has been focused while driving (and only checks her phone and thinks about Christen every time she takes out her phone along with the package she’s about to deliver).

And now she’s hunched over by the curb, with her eyes closed and her knees bent a little, and one hand balled into a fist gripping the hem of her shorts tightly and the other gripping her phone and pressing… against her heart.

She feels a hand on her back and looks up to see her customer, who looks alarmed before quickly typing on their phone.

_ ‘Tobin, are you okay?’ _ They ask.

Tobin shakes her head but gives them a small smile before typing a reply on her phone and showing it to them, ‘_ My girlfriend just left for Sweden and I don’t know when I’ll get to hold her again.’ _

*

Tobin cries herself to sleep that night.

*

The next morning, she wakes up to several messages on WhatsApp.

[Christen]  
_ Just landed at Heathrow but   
_ _ didn’t find any Heaths in a row   
_ _ and I am so disappointed   
_ _ *pouts*  
_ _ *  
_ _ Okay boarding now for the   
_ _ shorter flight to Stockholm   
_ _ my love  
_ _ I love you I love you  
_ _ *  
_ _ Aaaand I’m back in the land of   
_ _ fika - this means having a   
_ _ coffee break and a treat btw  
_ _ Although it actually means so   
_ _ much more than that  
_ _ It’s more a tradition, a way of   
_ _ life, an attitude that’s ingrained   
_ _ in Swedish culture  
_ _ To make time for friends over   
_ _ coffee and pastry   
_ _ Or a little something to eat really   
_ _ I wish we were having coffee   
_ _ and sharing a slice of pie right   
_ _ now  
_ _ It’s Valentine’s Day after all  
_ _ Happy Valentine’s Day my love  
_ _ Can you tell how much I miss   
_ _ you while I’m waiting for my   
_ _ luggage?  
_ _ *  
_ _ Just a short drive left and I’ll be   
_ _ back at my apartment   
_ _ *  
_ _ Kling and I call it the House of   
_ _ Happiness  
_ _ Right now it really doesn’t feel   
_ _ that way  
_ _ *  
_ _ I miss you so much babe  
_ _ I miss you so so much _

Tobin can picture Christen lying on her side, with tears in her eyes, her head resting on her forearm and her other hand holding her phone sideways against the mattress, because that’s exactly how Tobin is right now.

She lingers in her bed, answering Christen’s messages line for line, desperately hoping that she can talk to Christen before she goes to work.

But the two check marks on her messages don’t turn blue and Christen’s contact info remains the same.

‘Last seen today at 4:17 AM.’

Tobin doesn’t think she can get through recording a video without tearing up and decides to send a photo instead. Maybe two. The first one with her lying sideways, eyes closed and lips puckered comically for a kiss. And the second one with her pretending to be asleep, mouth hanging open and face squished hard against her pillow.

She hopes it’ll make Christen laugh. 

At least one of them should.

*

Tobin sees the WhatsApp badge notification 30 minutes too late around lunchtime.

[Christen]  
_ Jet lag is real :(  
_ _ I wanted to stay awake to   
_ _ see you _

Christen follows that up with a selfie where she’s pouting and two others where she’s copying Tobin’s selfies (only cuter, Tobin thinks).

And Tobin can’t help but smile.

[Tobin]  
_ Cutie!!!!  
_ _ *heart eyes* *heart eyes* *heart eyes*  
_ _ I love youuuuuuuuu _

*

Two hours later, Christen replies with a heart kiss emoji, a hug emoji, and a sleeping emoji. And Tobin knows she’s got nothing else to look forward to today.

*

She lies in bed early that night, just staring at the ceiling, absentmindedly stroking the left side of her bed, where Christen would’ve been.

And then she thinks she can’t be the only one feeling this way and she can do something about it. So she puts on a brave face and a smile and sends Christen a good morning video before trying her best to go to sleep.

*

[Christen]  
_ My love  
_ _ Please wake up soon  
_ _ Please please :* :* :* _

Tobin scrambles out of bed, with her phone and her glasses, and sits at her desk, after seeing what time the messages were sent.

[Tobin]  
_ I’m awake I’m awake  
_ _ Please be online my love  
_ _ Please be online _

Five minutes pass by before Christen’s contact info changes to Online and the check marks turn blue to indicate that Tobin’s messages have been read. And not a second later, Christen calls.

And the moment they see each other, they take a deep, satisfying breath… then sigh as they smile.

And they just smile at each other for a good long while, decidedly content to stare… 

_ Hi, _ Tobin signs.

“Hi,” Christen mouths.

And Tobin’s smile gets goofier and goofier before she asks, _ Do you still love me in Sweden? _

Christen beams, like she’s been waiting for this question, _ I love you to the moon and back, my love. _

*

When Tobin shows up at the Presses’ later that afternoon, Stacy immediately gives her a long, warm, motherly hug after greeting her at the door.

“Have you spoken to her yet?” Stacy asks.

Tobin beams and nods.

“Okay, good… Hang in there, Tobs,” Stacy says lovingly.

And Tobin nods again.

“Come hang out at the patio. It’s just you, me, and Cody today.”

It just dawns on Tobin that all of their three daughters are away from home… and she’s a daughter away from home.

She reminds herself to ask them about how things are with Channing in India.

*

The next morning, Tobin finds out exactly how busy Christen will be in the next three months.

She has two pre-season friendlies in the UK to prepare for in the next 10 days (starting tomorrow) with Tyresö.

Then, if she makes the roster, she’ll play with the national team in Portugal for the Algarve Cup until mid-March.

Then, there’s the two-legged Champions League quarterfinals with Tyresö in the last two weeks of March.

Then, there might be a friendly (or two) with the national team in the first two weeks of April. (There usually is.)

Then, there’s the start of the Swedish League mid-April.

Then, if they win their quarterfinals, the two-legged semi finals are scheduled in the last two weeks of April.

Then, more Swedish League games in May, not to mention the possibility of playing in the Champions League final if they win the semi finals. Again.

Tobin is exhausted just learning about it.

_ I feel a sense of deja vu, to be honest, _ Christen admits. _ Like I’m reliving the past year. _

_ A chance to do better, maybe? _

_ I don’t think so. _

_ Why not? _

_ Last year, I met you. _

They immediately break out into grins and giggles and playful double finger guns like the dorks that they are.  
*  
_ Honey, can I take a nap? _ Christen asks.

_ Still feeling jet lagged? _

Christen nods, _ It usually takes me three days to recover when I travel to this side of the world. And only one night when I get home. _

_ I hope you feel better soon, my love. Can we stay on the call while you nap though? _

_ And you write your article? _

Tobin gives her a toothy grin and nods.

Christen smiles and blows an air kiss, _ I’d love that.  
_ *  
_ How are you feeling? _ Tobin asks when Christen wakes up from her nap.

_ Coffee. _

Tobin laughs, then smiles sweetly, _ Want to go on a fika date with me? _

Christen’s face lights up.

And Tobin grins, _ I’ll take that as a yes? _

Christen nods like a child eager for her treat.  
*  
They don’t go out for fika (even if they want to) because it’s still snowing in Sweden. Instead, they opt for brewing coffee in their respective apartments, with Christen reheating the Swedish cinnamon rolls she has on hand and Tobin filling one of her bowls with chocolate chip-macadamia cookies.

Tobin brings them to her desk while Christen transfers (from her room) to her apartment’s dining area.

_ My love… _

_ Yes, my love. _

_ …why am I so high up? _ Tobin asks.

_ Oh, _ Christen smiles sheepishly. _ I’m using one of the sturdier phone holders to put my phone at eye level. _

Tobin laughs.

_ Don’t make fun of me! _

_ I’m not! I’m amazed, _ Tobin smiles. _ Okay, hold on, baby, give me a minute. _

She gets what she thinks is the identical phone holder Christen is using (because Tobin got herself the same three holders) and sets it up on her desk in a way that her phone will be at (her) eye level, too, before transferring her phone to it.

_ Better? _She asks.

Christen smiles wider, _ Thank you, baby. _

_ I obviously didn’t think of all the ways we could use this, _ Tobin chuckles.

_ Is it okay that we haven’t used it for what it was… originally intended… yet? _

_ I’m sure we’ll get desperate at some point, _ Tobin laughs. _ But it’s totally okay that we haven’t—not that I don’t want you. I want you all the time. I just… _

_ I know. Me, too. Although I honestly don’t know how I can… rein it in. You look so damn hot all the time, _Christen smirks.

Tobin rolls her eyes, _ Yeah, yeah, flattery will get you somewhere. _

_ I was hoping flattery will get _ you _ somewhere, baby.  
_ *  
Tobin doesn’t want to say goodnight at 2pm Pacific / 11pm Central European Time (when Christen needs to sleep). But she has to and she does.

*

She sends Christen another good morning video that night before going to sleep.

And there’s a good morning video from Christen waiting for her when she wakes up the next morning.

Watching it reminds her that she won’t be able to video chat with Christen until Monday next week—she sighs.

This is going to be a long week.

And it’s just Tuesday.

*

Tobin gets home before Lauren does that day.

And when Lauren gets home, she finds Tobin sprawled across the couch, just mindlessly playing Mario Kart. 

She decides to let her be.

*

The next day, Lauren comes home to the same scene. And she can only sigh and shake her head.

*

The day after that, however, Lauren has had enough.

She grabs the console from Tobin, who yelps.

_ Hey! _

_ Talk to me, _ Lauren orders. 

_ What is there to talk about? _ Tobin replies indignantly.

_ You’re miserable. _

_ Yes, of course, I’m miserable! _ Tobin looks as if she wants to add, ‘Duh.’

Lauren takes a deep, calming breath, _ Isn’t there a better use of your time? _

A few things immediately run through Tobin’s mind: updating her resume, finding a new job, brainstorming for an unassigned article, posting on Instagram, and just… looking for ways to keep in touch and stay connected with Christen.

Lauren must’ve sensed this because she looks at Tobin more kindly then lifts Tobin’s legs off the couch to make room for herself to sit.

_ Want to pray with me? _ Lauren asks.

And Tobin can only nod meekly.  
*  
She updates her resume that night then makes her first post on Instagram: a photo of a heart shape, with one half formed by her left hand signing the letter C and the other half drawn with a red sharpie on white paper.

*

The next morning, Tobin is surprised to see not only a WhatsApp notification but also an Instagram notification when she wakes up.

She gets another good morning video from Christen, which she watches three times, then a Like, followed by a Comment with a heart for her post.

But then, there are other Likes, like, from Ali? And other Comments?

mrapinoe: What romantic shit is this, Toby?  
kelleyohara: Lame  
reeba04: Ignore @kelleyohara. She’s just bitter you haven’t followed her yet.  
sydneyleroux: @reeba04 thank goodness I’m not the only one

Tobin laughs.

She tags all of them in her reply, with a tears-of-joy emoji, a hug emoji, and a Shaka emoji.

This isn’t so bad, she thinks.

*

That night she studies a map of the states carefully and starts job hunting from Kansas City to St. Louis, Missouri.

By Sunday night, her job search has reached Chicago and she has posted three more photos on Instagram.

On Friday: it’s a photo of the cliff and the ocean that she took from her and Christen’s sunset spot overlooking Lunada Bay.

kelleyohara: PV!!!  
christenpress: That Phillip Phillips song

On Saturday: the purple sky behind a silhouette of houses on Venice Beach.

kelleyohara: God, I miss LA. We should hang out when I’m there, Tobito.  
alikrieger: Such a nice pic, Tobs.  
tobinheath: @kelleyohara @alikrieger <3

On Sunday: a close-up of a framed quote from Winnie the Pooh that says, “As soon as I saw you, I knew a grand adventure was about to happen.”

ashlynharris24: I can’t with this, sis. You’re making me all mushy  
kelleyohara: Ew. Feelings. #imgonnaannoyyouuntilyoufollowmeback

(Christen likes all of her posts. And Tobin puts that Phillip Phillips song on repeat for the next couple of days.)

*

She feels lighter on Monday morning when she’s talking to Christen again over Skype… 

…until she doesn’t, when Christen breaks the news that she made the national team roster for the Algarve Cup in Portugal.

_ We won’t be able to video chat for three weeks? _Tobin frowns. It's hard not to feel sorry for her, with how sad and distraught she looks, but find her adorable at the same time. And it shows on Christen’s face. 

She leans in to give Tobin a kiss (or three), _ I’m so sorry, sweetheart… The Algarve Cup is a pretty intense tournament. We’ll be playing four matches in eight days, with only a week to prepare for it. _

Tobin can only nod and sigh, _ I hope you’ll do well, my love. I’ll pray you stay fit and healthy. _

Christen looks torn but after a few seconds of hesitation, she asks, _ Is this getting too hard for you? _

That feels like another slap in Tobin’s face, _ I’m not letting you go. _

_ Are you just trying to convince yourself that? _

_ I’m not letting you go, _ Tobin repeats with a firmer look on her face.

Christen sighs, _ This is hard for me, too. _

_ I know. _

_ Do you? _

_ I—I realize it now. I’m sorry. _

_ Thank you. _

_ I’m not sorry for loving you. _

_ Neither am I, my love. _

*

Three weeks.

Tobin just needs to survive on messages and a few recorded videos from Christen for three weeks.

So, at night, on a work day, she pours herself into finding jobs in the Upper East Coast, then back to the Midwest, and then back again to the Upper East Coast.

She still sends Christen good morning videos every night. And she posts a new photo on Instagram every morning, which starts out happy enough with a photo of Morena licking the side of her face as she smiles with her lips and her eyes closed and her glasses askew… 

…to a black & white profile of her in a ponytail and a tank top, with her head bowed, drenched in sweat, holding a tennis racket…

…to a view of her room from her bed, in sepia, with her legs still clearly under the covers, at the break of dawn… 

…to more sunset pics and more heart shape pics…

…the word ‘Love’ etched on a concrete sidewalk… 

…a girl giving food to a homeless man… 

…bible verses about staying strong in the face of despair… 

…a graphic artwork that says, ‘Love is patient / kind,’ which Christen guesses correctly as hers.

And for her part, Christen doesn’t seem to be faring any better based on her messages, which also start out happy enough.

[Christen]  
_ Portugal is so beautiful my   
_ _ love. I hope we can visit at   
_ _ some point in the future.  
_ _ *heart kiss emojis*  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ Can you believe we’re in a   
_ _ group with both Japan and  
_ _ Sweden?! Both bitter rivals!  
_ _ This is madness  
_ _ And I automatically want to   
_ _ shout “This. Is. Sparta!!!” lol  
_ _ I love youuuuu  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ We drew 1-1 against Japan  
_ _ This tournament did not   
_ _ start out well  
_ _ I wasn’t able to convert my   
_ _ chances :( :( :(  
_ _ The team lost against them   
_ _ in a penalty shootout in the   
_ _ last World Cup final, if you   
_ _ didn’t know  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ We lost to Sweden 1-0  
_ _ This sucks  
_ _ They have our former coach   
_ _ I came in as a sub but wasn’t   
_ _ able to contribute :(  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ I scored against Denmark   
_ _ when we were already down   
_ _ 3-0 to make it 3-1 before I got   
_ _ pulled out. Nothing to write   
_ _ home about  
_ _ Final score was 5-3  
_ _ Everyone is so upset  
_ _ We’re playing for 7th place on   
_ _ Thursday  
_ _ 7th!!!  
_ _ Ugh  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ At least we won against   
_ _ North Korea  
_ _ Record-worst 7th place   
_ _ finish *sigh*  
_ _ I don’t think anyone will be   
_ _ able to sleep well in the next   
_ _ few days  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ We’re spending this beautiful   
_ _ Friday just talking about what   
_ _ went wrong  
_ _ I feel sick to my stomach   
_ _ I should’ve done better  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ I’m back in Sweden, my love  
_ _ I can’t wait to see you   
_ _ tomorrow  
_ _ You make everything better  
_ _ I wish you were holding me   
_ _ tonight so I can sleep _

*

_ Please don’t be so hard on yourself, my love, _ Tobin asks earnestly in their Skype call the next morning. _ You’ve just returned from injury. This is your first tournament, your first two times playing 60 minutes in almost 10 months. _

Christen sighs, _ I know… I know, my love. Thanks for reminding me. I will definitely try. I’ve been working on it for the past three years—not to spend too much time in my head. _

Tobin nods, smiling softly, in understanding, _ How can I help? _

The question makes Christen pause and chew on her bottom lip, _ My love, is it too much to ask you to visit me soon? Like, in the next few weeks? _

Tobin realizes that she’s been secretly dreading this question, _ I’m sorry… I’m sorry, I can’t afford it yet, my love. _

_ But I can… _

_ I know you can. _

_ But you don’t want to fly across the Atlantic for me? _

_ It’s not about wanting to do it. _

_ It seems like it is. _

_ I want to do it. Believe me. But not like this. _

_ Not like what? Not when I’ll be paying for your airfare? _

_ I want to be able to pay for my own airfare. _

_ You said you would consider it if it meant we’d see each other again sooner… _

Tobin takes a deep breath and lets out an even deeper sigh.

_ …so why can’t you consider it? _

_ I don’t know how to explain it. I just don’t feel good about it. _

_ You don’t feel good about crossing an ocean for me? _

_ I don’t feel good about getting a 700-dollar plane ticket from my girlfriend for free. _

_ If we were in LA and I needed you but you didn’t have any money and I booked an Uber for you, would you get in the car to see me? _

_ Yes, I would. _

_ So why would you do that but not this? _

_ I could pay you back the 40 dollars. _

_ When you get out of that hypothetical Uber, would your first thought when you see me be, ‘Hey, let me pay you back?’ _

_ No, of course, not. _

_ No, of course, not. Because the fare doesn’t matter. _

_ It matters when it’s 700 dollars. _

_ It doesn’t matter whether it’s 40 dollars or a thousand dollars. You would get on that Uber because you love me. I would ask you to see me because I need you. And I need you, Tobin. _

_ Chris… _

_ I’m ordering hugs, _Christen is on the verge of tears.

And Tobin is clearly in anguish as she turns away from Christen for a split second before turning back.

_ I know international shipping will take longer and you won’t be able to do same-day delivery but I want my hugs. _

Now Tobin is on the verge of tears, _ I will deliver your hugs, I promise. I will deliver your hugs. But— _

_ But not when I pay for express shipping? _

_ I already feel bad enough as it is, Chris. Please don’t make me feel worse. _

_ Am I really asking for too much? For you to find time off work and get on a plane to see me? _

_ It’s not too much to ask me to get on a plane to see you. I would do it in a heartbeat if I could. But I just can’t afford it. I don’t have the money. _

_ But I do. And I don’t understand what’s so bad about me paying for the ticket when you’ll be the one making the actual effort to see me. I thought it was the least I could do. So why can’t you accept it? _

_ Because it makes me feel so small! _

Christen stills.

_ It makes me feel so small and I wish I could give you anything and everything you ever wanted but I couldn’t. Not yet. But I’m working on it. I want to be someone who deserves you, someone who can be there for you anytime you need me and buy these damn plane tickets for myself. And it’s killing me that I can’t, that I’m not, that I’m so far from who I want to be! _ Tobin’s chest heaves up and down in shallow breaths before she takes a deep, calming breath… _ Please believe me when I tell you that I want nothing more than to hold you and kiss you again… But if I say yes to you buying me a plane ticket, even if being with you would make me so fucking happy for the few days we’re together, I’d feel so awful after, and not just because I’d miss you more… And I just… I don’t want to go down that path… _

A few tears escape Christen’s eyes, which she quickly wipes away, _ I’m so sorry for making you feel bad. I didn’t mean to… _

_ I’m sorry, too… It’s not easy for me to say no to this… _

_ I know that now… And I get it now… I hope you know how much I love you. _

Tobin sighs… and nods.

_ Do you know why? _Christen asks.

_ Do I know why you love me? _

Christen nods.

_ I… make you happy? _

Christen nods again with a soft and weepy smile, _ What else? _

Tobin can’t help but smile a little when she signs, _ I love you? _

Christen smiles a little bit more, shaking her head in amusement and teasing, _ Cop out. _

_ Fine. I don’t really know why you love me. I ask myself sometimes why you do. _

_ Tobin, I love you because you showed me kindness even when we’ve just met and you only knew me as the girl who accepted packages for Channing Press… I love you because you went out of your way and still go out of your way to make me feel better when I need it or make me feel good just because… to make me laugh and smile… I love you because not only did you accept my silly and outrageous quirks, you embraced them and still love me despite them… I love you because you have been incredibly patient with me and forgiving and thoughtful and caring… I love you because you encourage me to be the best version of myself, to learn, to grow… and I love you because I want to do the same for you, be the same for you, the kind of partner that you are to me… And I could go on and on about how much you make me feel cherished and valued and loved but it all boils down to— _

_ You love me because I love you. _

_ I’m trying to be romantic here, my love. _

_ Sorry. Yes, please, continue romancing me, _Tobin puts on an irresistibly adorable smile.

And Christen can’t help but smile back, before taking a deep breath, _ I do want to bear witness to the person you would become, my love, and stand beside you as you become the person you want to be, but I love you for who you already are… I know you love me just as much… And by the simple virtue of loving each other, we deserve each other, sweetheart. So please don’t ever think otherwise. _

Tobin takes a moment to take it all in before nodding, _ I’ll work on it. _

_ Thank you… _

_ Can I still say no to you buying me a plane ticket? _

_ Yes, but can I also say no to you shouldering all of it? Because even though you’ll be the one flying out, it benefits us both. So can we make a compromise? _

_ Splitzies? _

Christen almost snorts into a giggle but catches herself, _ Okay, yes. For now. _

_ But for the future? _

_ Maybe a more complicated… allocation? I believe it doesn’t have to be split in the middle, like when we’re grocery shopping, for it to be equal. It should be more like when I cook and you wash the dishes. Is that something you’d consider? _

_ Only if you make us our own Excel file or whatever app it is you’re using to manage your finances, _Tobin smirks.

Christen shakes her head again but smirks back, _ Deal. _

_ I think we should kiss on it. _

_ I think you’re right. _

They giggle as they lean closer to their screens to give each other a kiss… or two… or seven… (They just keep kissing.)

_ I love you, _they sign at the same time.

_ Let’s not fight again? _Christen requests before leaning in for another kiss.

_ Oh, I don’t know, _ Tobin smirks again before kissing the screen again. _ I’m totally enjoying this romancing. _

_ I can romance you without the fighting. _

_ Really? _

Christen bites her lower lip then signs, _ Tobin. _

_ Yes, love. _

_ I’m alone. _

Tobin’s lips can’t help but part a little at the thought of what’s about to happen, _ Chris. _

_ Yes, love. _

_ I’m yours. _

*


	7. Two wishes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you're doing well. Hang in there. Stay safe. Stay home.  
And thanks for coming back. To read.

  
  


Tobin can’t think straight.

“You really declined her offer?” Cody asks her in surprise.

She’s back at the Presses’ patio, lounging with Cody and Stacy an hour before Sunday dinner and struggling to hold a conversation because, every so often, visions of what their daughter did in the Skype call earlier keep flashing through her mind.

She can only nod.

“Wow,” Cody chuckles, “I was so sure she’d be able to convince you to go and you’d be joining us in Sweden this weekend. But I guess I was wrong.”

Tobin almost groans at the implication—and also from remembering how a few hours ago, she asked, _ Bed? _ And Christen just bit her lip bashfully then shook her head—but she lets out a nervous giggle as she types on her app, which answers for her, “Oh, she… gave me a… hard time… for it.”

Cody and Stacy laugh before Cody says, “We can imagine.”

Tobin blushes because, God, she hopes not. Not with the kind of moving pictures seared in her memory—of Christen peeling off her clothes and kneeling on her chair before slowly… excruciatingly… spreading her legs wide for Tobin… 

“When are you planning to see her?” Stacy asks.

And Tobin tenses—almost the same way she sat frozen on her chair, mesmerized, as Christen brought her right hand to her breast and started… squeezing… before tugging at her nipple… then stopping with a raised eyebrow as a challenge—no, a demand… 

Stacy gives her an appraising look, “You’re thinking of surprising her, aren’t you?”

No. Tobin is thinking of how she obediently made quick work of her clothes then knelt on her chair, with her hands on her thighs, and how Christen used her free hand to sweep her hair to one side, over her shoulder (which she knows drives Tobin crazy), before spelling out, _ I won’t… move again… until you… move… _

“Yes, I… would… really… like to… surprise her,” Tobin’s app (rep)lies for her.

“And you prefer not to tell us?” Stacy asks with her eyes twinkling.

Tobin nods with a shy smile. She won’t ever tell a soul how she spread her legs wide just as slowly as Christen did, then skimmed the palm of her left hand from her thigh, to her ribs, to her breast… before squeezing and tugging at her own nipple… and how Christen immediately continued… her own ministrations… 

“Alright, we’ll stop asking about that then,” Stacy smiles knowingly before standing up. “I’ll go check on the oven.”

“Be right with you,” Cody tells her before turning back to Tobin. “Well, you know when our flight is… so if you want to send her something, just bring it here before we leave.”

Tobin beams.

Then Cody stands up and gives her a fist bump with a grin, “See you inside, Tobs.”

Tobin nods again, watches Cody disappear inside the house, then sighs in relief. And vivid mental images of Christen touching and stroking herself between her legs flood Tobin’s consciousness instantly like a dam breaking.

She’s grateful for the ice-cold drink (given to her before they went out to the patio), which she gulps down. 

Then she closes her eyes and surrenders… to her reverie…   
*  
When she opens her eyes minutes later, chest still heaving in shallow breaths, there’s a newfound sense of determination on her face as she recalls Stacy’s words, ‘You’re thinking of surprising her, aren’t you?’

And she leaves the patio with her mind made up.

*

She googles US Soccer and NWSL when she gets home that night.

*

_ I can’t stop thinking about yesterday… _Christen confesses the next morning.

_ Me too… _Tobin answers.

They’re both leaning towards their laptops (on their desks) closer than they normally would, with their gestures softer… slower… as if whispering… 

_ Did you like it? _ Christen asks.

They exchange bashful smiles before Tobin nods.

Christen coyly bites her lower lip, _ My love… _

_ Yes, my love… _

_ I’m going to be very busy… the next couple of days… _

Now Tobin looks amused, wondering why Christen isn’t outright telling her what she wants, _ My love… _

_ Yes, my love… _

_ Here at the desk again? _

Christen blushes and fights a grin from breaking out, _ Bed this time? _

Tobin doesn’t exactly know where it’s coming from but she just knows her smirk looks as delicious as it feels… when she takes her shirt off…   
*  
And when they both let out contented sighs and smile softly at each other… when Christen pulls up the covers to her chest because she’s cold, but Tobin doesn’t… when Christen lies on her side to face Tobin and starts caressing her bed with her left hand… and when Christen’s eyes start fluttering (as if) in slow motion… Tobin asks, _ Sleep? _

Christen pouts, _ I don’t want to. _

_ I’ll stay with you. _

_ While I sleep? _

Tobin nods then moves closer to her laptop, still lying on her back, and adjusts the screen so that she can appear closer to Christen, _ There’s nowhere else I’d rather be. _

Christen smiles brighter as she keeps caressing the empty spot on the mattress next to her.

Tobin smiles back and starts caressing her chest with her left hand, mimicking Christen’s movements, before urging Christen, _ Sleep. _

_ I want to video chat every day. _

_ And try other positions? _

Christen laughs, _ I don’t mean Skype sex everyday—although I’m not… opposed, _ she smirks, _ if only we had time… But it’s kind of impossible this week with our schedules. I just want to see you and talk with you everyday… Because as nice as the videos are, we aren’t really… talking in them. And I don’t want to go a few days without talking to you again—even if it’s just for a minute. _

_ I can park the van for a bit around lunchtime so we can WhatsApp. Maybe give you an estimated time after loading my van? You’re always free between 9pm to 11pm, right? _

Christen beams, _ You’ll do that for me? _

Tobin nods, beaming back at Christen, _ I’ll do anything to get you to smile and look at me like that. _

It takes a beat before Christen groans, “Ugh, I can’t with your stupid, charming—” _ You owe me another orgasm in our two-day sexgasborg. _

Tobin busts out laughing.

*

That night, after submitting her assigned article, Tobin opens her Instagram with a singular purpose. And the DM she expects to receive arrives in mere seconds.

[Kelley]  
_ Finally!   
_ _ About damn time you followed   
_ _ me back Burrito _

[Tobin]  
_ Hey KO!  
_ _ Could I ask you for a favor? _

[Kelley]  
_ If I did this favor, would it  
_ _ automatically make me your   
_ _ favorite? _

[Tobin]  
_ Forever _

[Kelley]  
_ Sweet!! _

*

Tobin’s dopey smile appears as soon as she wakes up the next morning and sees Christen’s equally dopey smile on video.

“Goob morning, babe… Guess what? I’ll be free to take your call when you wake up…”

Tobin laughs… because, of course, Christen couldn’t wait until her nighttime to talk with Tobin again.

She calls after the video ends and she fixes one of the phone holders on her nightstand and secures her phone in place.

Christen gapes at her once the call connects, _ You’re still in bed? _

She seems to be in a private room so Tobin gives her a cheeky smile and a nod then opens her arms wide to ask for a hug.

And Christen takes the bait, smirking as she leans closer to her phone.

Then Tobin grabs her phone and lowers it to her lips, kissing it once… twice… three times… before turning her head a little and moving her phone slowly… across her jaw… down to her neck… her collar bone… just below her neckline… then pushing it away again just in time to see Christen closing her parted lips, breathing heavily, and gulping.

Tobin looks smug, _ So one more orgasm? _

Christen narrows her eyes in fake annoyance, _ Two. For teasing. _

And Tobin’s laugh has never been heartier.  
*  
_ You’ll still call me later, right? _ Christen asks.

Tobin laughs again, _ Yes, of course, I’ll still call you later, baby. _

And so goes their morning… and their next two mornings.

Christen sends Tobin a video to greet her good morning and tell her if she can or cannot call when she wakes up. Then Tobin sends Christen a message after loading the van to tell her around what time she can expect another call before she goes to sleep.

When Tobin returns to the hub, she speaks to her manager about her shift and a few coworkers to ask for favors. Then after work, she enlists Lauren’s help to pick out stuff to send to Christen.

By Thursday night, Tobin and Lauren deliver a sealed, medium-sized rectangular box, with a fake shipping label (complete with Christen’s address in Sweden) to Cody and Stacy, who reassure Tobin for the nth time that they’re very much willing to bring it with them, that it’s not an inconvenience in the slightest, that they’re allowed two checked baggage each, and that, more importantly, Christen will love it.

_ That box is so extra, _ Lauren smirks. _ I love it. _

Tobin laughs and sports a self-satisfied grin all the way home. Then she sends Christen her happiest good morning video to date.

But by Friday morning, there’s no good morning video waiting for her.

[Christen]  
_ Babe  
_ _ I need you  
_ _ Please wake up soon  
_ _ Please _

Tobin immediately clicks on the video call button and an overwhelming sense of dread and helplessness fills every fiber of her being when she sees Christen crying on the screen. She wants to rush to the airport right then and there but she can’t and she can only ask, _ Honey, are you hurt? What’s wrong? _

Christen starts hiccuping as she cries, _ I’m… not hurt… my love… Tyresö… just declared… bankruptcy. _

_ No shit. _

_ Yes, shit. The shittiest, _ Christen laughs despite herself. _ Two days before our Champions League quarterfinal! _

_ I’m so sorry, my love… What can I do? Would you like to meditate with me? _

Christen nods eagerly.

And after a couple of minutes, she’s calm enough to tell Tobin about the team’s excellent morning training session before their Twitter feed blew up with the bankruptcy headlines… about the fear everyone felt in the locker room… about being told to go home before noon and pray… about all the warning signs of the club’s financial problems, which started cropping up early last year… and about the 3pm court hearing that will determine their fate.

_ So that’s in… an hour and a half? _Tobin asks.

Christen nods again.

_ Okay, I’ll stay with you until you get news. _

_ But the Friday traffic— _

_ I’m not leaving you, Chris. _

Christen gives her a grateful smile, _ Thank you, my love. That means the world to me. _

_ Yeah, well, you mean the world to me. _

Christen beams, _ I love you. _

_ I love you. _

_ Could you, maybe… start your day now and just… bring your phone and me along with you? _

_ Even in the shower? _

_ Especially in the shower? _

They exchange silly giggles and even sillier kisses before Tobin goes to the kitchen to make coffee, with her phone, a phone holder, and Christen.  
*  
By the time the court hearing starts, Tobin is dressed in her uniform and sitting at her desk, waiting patiently for any news with Christen.

_ Baby, what’s the… worst case scenario? _Tobin asks.

_ The worst isn’t so bad actually, _Christen tells her with a wistful smile.

_ What do you mean? _

_ I’d be unemployed but… I’d get to come home. _

Tobin can’t help but smile back just as wistfully, _ There’s another ‘but’ in there somewhere, I’m sure. _

Christen sighs, _ Well, the major downside is… I won’t get to play for the national team if I don’t have a club team. _

_ Okay, the worst case scenario won’t happen then. _

_ You seem so sure. _

_ I am. If Tyresö folded, you’d be, like, a free agent, right? _

_ Yes. _

_ No club in their right mind wouldn’t want to snatch you up once you’re a free agent. _

Christen smiles dreamily at Tobin, _ How did I get so lucky with you? _

_ I ask myself that all the time. _

_ It’s like you really just showed up at my doorstep one morning and told me, ‘Here I am. What are your other two wishes?’ _

Tobin laughs… then looks at Christen intently and smirks, _ What are your other two wishes? _

_ Stop it… You’re already in your uniform… _

_ That hasn’t stopped you before. _

But something on her phone does and Christen looks at it more closely before closing her eyes and breathing a long sigh of relief.

_ Please tell me it’s good news, _ Tobin asks.

Christen nods meekly, _ The Swedish Government bailed us out— _

_ Thank goodness. _

_ —until June. _

_ That’s enough time to find a new club. _

_ We’ll see… _

_ Want to call your mom and dad now? _

_ I think I should. At least now I won’t have to tell them to cancel their flight in a few hours… Thank you, my love. I love you, _ Christen leans closer to her phone. “I love you, I love you…” 

_ I love you. I’ll call later to say goodnight. _

_ Yes, please. Thank you. Drive safe for me. _

_ Always. _

*

Christen’s smile couldn’t be any brighter that Saturday morning when she shows Tobin the huge towel with ‘Beach, Please’ printed on it (as if Tobin hasn’t seen it), “Babe, I love my care package so much! Thank you, thank you, thank you! I love you!”

*

On Sunday, Christen scores a hat trick in the first leg of their Champions League quarterfinal.

*

A week later, things are going so well (in Tobin’s opinion) that when Christen tells Tobin more good news, which includes confirmation that Tyresö is going to the semi finals, Tobin is incredibly grateful but not surprised.

_ I made the roster for the two-game series against China! _Christen beams.

Tobin fist pumps while beaming back, _ I knew it! I knew you’d make that roster! _

_ I’m flying back to the States in two days, my love. _

_ I can’t wait until you’re just a few hours away. _

_ Me, too! _

_ So the first match is— _

_ On April 6th in Denver. That’s a Monday, so you’ll be able to watch, _ Christen grins.

But all of a sudden, a guilty look shows on Tobin’s face.

Christen picks up on it just as quickly, _ Sweetheart…? _

_ I’m sorry… I won’t be able to watch it live, my love… I have work that day. _

“Oh,” Christen’s face falls.

And Tobin feels really, really, really bad. 

_ You won’t be able to watch both games, _ Christen sadly concludes. _ The second one is on Friday that same week in New Jersey. _

There are so many emotions swirling inside Tobin that she can’t take it anymore—she grins, _ My love, you said Jersey. _

_ Yes, my love, Jersey. _

_ Would you like to meet my family? _

Christen’s face lights up in an instant, _ I can’t believe I didn’t think of that! I’ll text them. Maybe they can watch—do you think they’d like to watch? Like, in person? _

_ If they’re free, then I’m sure they would. _

*

_ They’re all coming! _ Christen excitedly tells Tobin the next morning. _ Except for your brother, of course, because he’s still in school. _

_ I’m so jealous they’ll get to watch you play in person, _Tobin pouts.

_ Sweetheart, can I… buy you a plane ticket… so you can be there, too? _Christen asks slowly, cautiously.

Tobin takes a deep breath and shakes her head, _ I’m sorry. _

Christen sighs, _ I had to ask… _

_ I know. _

*

[Christen]  
_ Just landed in Denver, my love  
_ _ You’re so close and yet so far  
_ _ :(  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
“todo me lleva a ti,   
como si todo lo que existe,   
aromas, luz, metales,   
fueran pequeños barcos que   
navegan   
hacia las islas tuyas que me   
aguardan”  
*  
[Christen]  
_ Babe  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ Yes babe _

[Christen]  
_ Neruda?  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ Neruda _

[Christen]  
_ *swoon* _

Tobin can’t help but raise both fists high above her head, with her eyes closed, face tilted up towards the sky, and the corner of her eyes crinkling as she smiles to herself on the sidewalk. And she can’t help but giggle and skip and hop and jump and whoop and bang the side of her van like a drum.

*

_ You’re up to something, _ Christen deadpans in their FaceTime call that night. _ I can tell. _

Tobin smirks but doesn’t reply.

_ What is it? _Christen prods as she tries to stop herself from smiling too much.

_ You’ll know soon enough. _

*

Love notes in Tobin’s handwriting, with a quote or a poem or a part of a poem, start appearing every morning in Christen’s hotel room, slipped under the door while Christen and her roommate, Whitney, are still asleep.

They put Christen in such a good mood every day that she peppers her camera with kisses when she FaceTimes with Tobin every night and she can’t even manage to pout when she tells Tobin that her teammates keep denying their involvement and Tobin still refuses to reveal who her co-conspirators are. Nothing seems to faze her. Not her “bad” performance on (the first) game day nor the sudden firing of their coach right after the match. Nothing except the mix-up over her return flight to Sweden, which she only discovers after the team arrives in New Jersey.

_ I can’t believe I’ll be on a red-eye flight back to Sweden right after the match this Friday, instead of leaving in the afternoon two days later, _she huffs in annoyance.

_ It’ll be okay, my love, _Tobin tries to assure her.

_ But I’m supposed to get two more love notes, _she pouts.

And Tobin stops herself from laughing, _ I’ll make it up to you, I promise. _

_ You’ll write to me everyday? _

_ I’ll do more than that, my love. _

*

Grand romantic gestures are, apparently, not as grand nor as romantic as TV shows and movies paint them to be, Tobin learns.

In real life, there are no epic montages or picturesque locations or swelling music. Or running. Just a lot of waiting… 

Waiting in a dimly-lit hallway, all alone, leaning against a gray wall… 

Jumping at mere shadows… 

Constantly checking the time and wishing seconds would turn quickly into minutes… 

Praying an older sister would give much needed information… unwittingly… and soon.

[Perry]  
_ That is it! USA wins 3-0!  
_ _ Christen didn’t score but we   
_ _ loved watching her play  
_ _ *  
_ _ The team is going around the   
_ _ pitch now  
_ _ I hope she sees us  
_ _ *  
_ _ We just met her!  
_ _ Said she’ll be back to chat  
_ _ Oh Tobs, she’s beautiful  
_ _ *  
_ _ We spent a couple of minutes   
_ _ talking and laughing  
_ _ Mostly about you lol  
_ _ Mom’s quite taken by her  
_ _ She’s wonderful  
_ _ Wish we could take her out for   
_ _ dinner but she said she’s going   
_ _ straight to the airport   
_ _ Plus her aunt and cousins are   
_ _ also here  
_ _ Might be the ones she’s talking   
_ _ to right now _

[Tobin]  
_ Thanks for coming to her game _

[Perry]  
_ Happy to be here _

[Tobin]  
_ You guys heading for dinner   
_ _ now? _

[Perry]  
_ Yep _

[Tobin]  
_ Okay _

Not really okay. But okay. More waiting. But now with friendly, happy, surprised faces greeting Tobin as she waits.

First, there’s Alyssa, whose eyes widen a little before giving Tobin a warm smile and a high five, then going inside the locker room, just a few feet away from where Tobin is standing.

Then, there’s Becky, who simply smirks the most joyful smirk Tobin has seen on her face then nods her head once, which makes Tobin feel proud of herself for some reason.

Then, there’s Abby, who gives her a finger gun salute and a wink. And HAO, who beams at her then pats her on the shoulder. And Sydney, who hugs her and thanks her for finally following her on Insta. And Kling and Whitney, who give her high fives, plus, “We did it,” and “Thank God we pulled it off,” before Tobin thanks them. Then, Ali and Pinoe, who give her excited, open-mouthed smiles before crushing her with simultaneous hugs.

“Oh, my gosh,” Ali gushes, “you’re here to surprise her?”

Tobin nods and smiles.

“Oh, Toby, Toby, Toby,” Pinoe shakes her head as she inspects the fake shipping label on Tobin’s zipped-up jacket, “you’re in way too deep, aren’t you?”

Tobin laughs.

“So where is lover girl?” Pinoe asks no one in particular before going back to the corner to take a peek at the hallway that leads to the pitch and then laughing because a wild Kelley appears.

“Quick! Hide!” Kelley exclaims, grabs Pinoe by the elbow with both arms and drags her to the locker room door, then goes back to do the same to Ali, who starts giggling along with Tobin, then goes back again for Tobin, places a hand on her shoulder, looks straight into her eyes with a super serious face, and says, “Time to do your thing, Dorito. She’s on her way.”

And Tobin nods with a face that’s just as serious before the two of them proceed with a quick, four-move secret handshake (practiced over FaceTime because dorks), a tight hug, and two pats on the back.

_ Thank you, _Tobin signs before Kelley disappears inside the locker room, leaving Tobin hoping that the minutes are now down to seconds. 

She starts counting. 

One Mississippi, two Mississippi—

_ ‘I don’t think you’re ready for this jelly—I don’t think you’re ready for this jelly—I don’t think you’re ready for this—’ _ Ugh. Tobin officially regrets catching up on Glee on the flight over. _ ‘I don’t think you’re ready for this—Cause my body too bootylicious for ya, babe—I don’t think you’re ready for this jelly—I don’t think you’re ready—’ _A shadow approaches. And Tobin recognizes that bun and that neck anywhere.

She lifts her gaze just in time for Christen to round the corner and meet her gaze, with Christen’s mouth immediately going slack. Then, in a split second, she’s running towards Tobin, flinging her arms around Tobin’s neck, and slamming herself against Tobin in a tackle-hug so hard it makes Tobin take a few steps back, and God… 

She’s in her arms… 

Christen is back in her arms and Tobin realizes just how much she misses this.

She misses this so much she wants to savor every bit of it. The feeling of Christen’s body pressing against her body. Christen’s arms around her neck and her arms around Christen’s back. The texture of Christen’s hair against her nose. Christen’s neck against her cheek. Christen’s scent. Christen’s sweat. Christen’s everything… 

Before long, Christen is pulling away, cupping her face with both hands and looking at her lovingly, reverently, disbelievingly, “You’re here.”

Tobin nods with a soft smile, looks down at her chest, then up again. And Christen notices the sticker on Tobin’s jacket and looks at it more closely.

_ Christen Press  
_ _ The Locker Room  
_ _ Red Bull Arena  
_ _ 600 Cape May St.  
_ _ Harrison, NJ, 07029 _

Christen smiles coyly at Tobin before asking, “Should I really… open… my package here?”

Tobin laughs, then nods.

“Okay, babe, if you say so,” Christen smirks before moving a little bit further away from Tobin to remove the sticker and place it just below Tobin’s left shoulder while Tobin keeps her hands on Christen’s waist. Then she unzips Tobin’s jacket and opens it to reveal a custom screen printed t-shirt that says: _ Hugs for Christen. _

And Christen laughs, before pressing her lips against Tobin’s, lingering there for a little while, then adding a peck (or two), nuzzling her face against Tobin’s neck, and hugging Tobin again.

Tobin can’t help but take a deep, satisfying breath as she closes her eyes, holds Christen tighter, and smiles contentedly as they sway from side to side.

But then Christen pulls away again, this time, with sadness in her eyes, “I’m leaving tonight…” 

Tobin gives her an apologetic smile then shakes her head.

Christen furrows her brows, “I’m not?”

Tobin nods.

“It’s a… prank?”

Tobin grimaces then shakes her head but without conviction.

Christen narrows her eyes, “Whose idea was it?”

Tobin lets out a grumbling sigh because she really just wants to keep holding Christen but she relents and uses one hand to spell out, _ Kelley’s. _

“To what end?”

Tobin grudgingly relinquishes her hold to sign, _ To get you to pack and bring your luggage here. _

Christen does the same, _ So that I can go with you? _

Tobin grins and nods.

_ Oh, my God, I lied to our families?! _

_ No, you didn’t. _

_ But I did. _

_ You didn’t know. _

_ But now I know. _

_ Honey, we can keep talking about that or we can go to our Airbnb right now and, you know… do more… important… things. _

It makes Christen pause before she snorts and shakes her head, then sighs and bites her lower lip, _ I love you. _

_ I love you. _

_ Give me ten minutes. _

_ Title of your sex tape. _

Christen playfully swats Tobin’s arm before giving her another kiss and rushing to the locker room.  
*  
They’re sitting so close inside the Uber that they’re one speed hump away from sitting on the other’s lap.

_ Baby, how long until we arrive at the Airbnb? _Christen asks.

_ 15 minutes, _Tobin shows her the estimated time on the app.

_ Okay, that’s enough time. Explain, _ Christen instructs. 

Tobin chuckles. 

_ Please… _

_ Okay… well, I felt like I needed to make it up to you after we argued over the plane ticket and stuff… and I really wanted to see you as soon as possible. But since I still couldn’t afford to go to Sweden, I targeted one of the April friendlies, which I kind of knew you wouldn’t tell me more about until you’re sure you’re in the roster. So I googled it. _

_ And found the venues and the dates. _

_ Yes. _

_ Makes sense—choosing Jersey over Colorado to be able to visit your family, too. _

_ They don’t know I’m here. _

“What?”

_ Baby, I’ll only have, like, 40 hours with you. I don’t want to share. _

“Oh, Tobin…” 

_ I’m serious. _

_ Okay, so why did you decide to come here instead of Denver? _

_ A few factors, really… One, I had an open return ticket to Jersey, which meant I only needed to pay for the flight back to LA—I wasn’t able to get an early flight going here, though, and only got to the stadium in the last five minutes of the match or something… Then, two… this was the schedule that worked out after swapping shifts and getting an approved time off, which is great, because, three, your games and official appointments are done and we can do whatever until Sunday. _

Christen can’t help but give her a quick kiss, _ Thank you for doing this, my love, for us… _

_ I did it more for myself, if I’m being honest. _

Christen laughs, _ Yeah, I’d do it for myself, too, if I were in your shoes. _

Tobin laughs.

_ We need to seriously talk about our compromise soon, though. _

_ Okay. _

_ So where did Kelley come in? _

_ I obviously needed help so I also googled who played here. _

_ And she’s the only one you knew. _

_ And she seems desperate to be my friend so I took advantage of it. _

“Tobin,” Christen laughs again.

_ Kelley has been nothing but awesome. She was immediately on board with my plan and really went out of her way to help me. She willingly delivered my love letters, roped in Kling and Whitney, came up with the fake ticket thing, got me an access pass to the stadium and coordinated with the staff to let me in, and recommended two decent Airbnb’s within my budget. _

Christen smiles, _ I bet she demanded something in return. _

Tobin fidgets, _ My… loyalty and friendship? _

Christen narrows her eyes, _ Tobin, what did you promise her? _

Tobin hesitates, _ I… promised to make her our marriage officiant— _

“Tobin.”

_ —and godmother to our children. _

“Tobin!”

_ All our children, Chris! _

Christen laughs harder and slaps Tobin’s thigh, _ Be serious! What was it? _

Tobin sighs, _ I need to wear an O’Hara jersey in all the games I’ll watch in person where she’s part of the roster. _

Christen laughs again, _ That’s not so bad. _

_ You won’t mind if I do that instead of wearing your jersey? _

_ Not at all. But I’m dreading how she’ll twist my arm to get her way in the future. _

_ I’m sorry. _

_ Don’t be. I’m incredibly grateful for her and everything she’s done. _

_ Me, too, _ Tobin smiles, threads their fingers together then kisses the back of Christen’s hand.  
*  
“This place is really nice and cozy, babe,” Christen beams, holding the door open for Tobin, who lugs her suitcase inside the studio apartment.

Tobin grins and gives her a peck on the lips before walking through the quaint kitchen, past the divider shelf, and towards the dresser in front of the large sofa bed, which has already been opened and made.

She sets Christen’s luggage against the wall, next to the dresser, then feels Christen’s arms around her waist and Christen’s front against her back.

Her eyes close for a moment as she breathes in and places her hands over Christen’s hands before turning around, then cupping Christen’s face and caressing her cheek.

Christen holds her tighter… 

And they kiss… slowly… deliberately… reacquainting themselves with each other’s lips, each other’s tongues, each other’s teeth, and how they feel, and how they taste, and how they move. How every touch, and every twist, and every curl, and every bite, and every scrape still makes their hearts beat faster, breaths quicker, heads dizzy and bodies thrum with need… and want… for more… 

They start undressing just as slowly as they kiss. And their jackets are the first to go… and then their shirts… their shoes… their socks… their jeans… their underwear… 

Then they tumble into bed… naked, moaning, breathless… bodies pressed against each other… 

And they take their time… rediscovering every inch…   
*  
Christen has never been more vocal. 

And Tobin can’t take her eyes off Christen’s face as her mouth and her tongue and her fingers work tirelessly between Christen’s legs… 

“Tobin… Babe… Don’t stop… Fuck… Oh, God… Tobin… Tobin… Uhhh… Uhhh… Tobin… Mmm… Baby… Don’t stop… Don’t stop… Yeah… I’m close… So close… Oh, fuck… Right there… Keep going… Baby… Make me come… Fuck.”

Christen’s legs start trembling.

“Oh, God… Oh, my God… Tobin, Tobin, yeah… Don’t stop, don’t stop, baby, fuck, I’m close, I’m close, keep going, oh, God, oh, fuck, oh, fuck… Tobin… Tobin… Tobin… Oh, fuck. Fuck. Fuck… Tobin, Tobin, Tobin… Baby, yeah… Yeah… I’m coming, I’m coming, fuck, fuuuuck—”

Her back arches as she lets out a long, guttural moan that Tobin feels… then lays there, panting… 

But Tobin doesn’t stop.

“Babe… I can’t… I don’t think—uhhh… Fuck… Tobin…”   
*  
Tobin has also never been louder… when Christen gets her turn… 

*

It’s almost 9am when Christen stirs (the next morning).

And Tobin drops what she’s doing in the kitchen and crawls back into bed.

Christen opens her eyes a little and smiles before closing her eyes again and draping her arms over Tobin’s back for morning snuggles, with Christen still naked under the covers and Tobin already in her boxer briefs and t-shirt.

They just lie there for a while, nestled in each other’s arms, with goofy smiles and their eyes closed… until Tobin starts placing sweet kisses on Christen’s neck and Christen starts to giggle.

Tobin lifts herself up a little and spells out, _ Pancakes? _

“Yes, pancakes?”

They both snort.

“Are you really making pancakes?” Christen asks.

And Tobin nods. (She bought ingredients for their meals when she arrived.)

“Okay, let me just put some clothes on and wash my face.”

Tobin sits up, straddling Christen’s hips, _ And then we meditate? _

Christen beams… then nods enthusiastically and sits to give Tobin a kiss, _ I love you. I’m so happy that you’re here. _

Tobin lets out a dreamy sigh with an equally dreamy smile, _ I love you. I’m so happy that I’m here with you. _

*

They share a stack of pancakes and a bowl of fresh fruit but have separate cups of coffee. 

And they act as if taking a bite and chewing their food are just things to do to pass the time in between kisses.

*

Their next 26 hours goes like this: dishwashing, morning sex, shower sex, actual shower, chicken salad lunch prep, lunch, more dishwashing, afternoon sex, afternoon nap, ordering sushi for dinner, kissing and cuddling, dinner, more sex, just enough sleep, morning quickie, muesli breakfast, dishwashing again, morning sex again, actual shower, packing bags, more kissing, more cuddling, and countless I love you’s.

But sooner than they both want, it’s 12 noon on Sunday and they’re checking out of the Airbnb and booking an Uber to get to Newark Liberty International Airport.

*

_ I hate airports, _Tobin frowns when Christen comes back to her after check-in.

_ You’ll love them half the time, sweetheart, _Christen tells her.

_ Yeah, but right now, it’s that other half when I hate them. _

*

Tobin doesn’t cry. Neither does Christen.

But they hold each other a little longer and give each other one more kiss when it’s time for Christen to go through border control. 

Then with a heavy heart, Tobin begins the long trudge to her own check-in counter and boarding gate.

*

Christen has a busy week ahead of her, with Tyresö’s first Swedish League game of the season on Thursday and the first leg of the Champions League semi finals (which is an away game) on Sunday. So Tobin carries on with the lunchtime calls for them to keep talking and for her to give Christen a kiss goodnight.

When Christen receives Tobin’s call in her hotel room that Sunday after the semi final game, she seems a bit glum.

_ Can I just stay in bed for a whole week? _Christen whines.

Okay, maybe not just a bit glum.

_ Are you tired, my love? _Tobin asks.

Christen sighs in acquiescence, _ I’m exhausted… _

_ Was it a tough, physical match? _

_ No, not really. _

_ Okay, well, do you want to… tell me more about why you’re feeling exhausted? _

_ It must be an extended jet lag. _

_ Is it? _

_ No, _Christen pouts and shakes her head like a petulant child.

_ Baby… _

Christen groans, _ Have I told you I yelled at the ref and a few of my teammates today? _

_ No. Does that happen often? _

_ It used to happen a lot in college… I’ve been better ever since but… I’m still prone to… bouts of rage on the field every now and then… _

_ Wow… _

_ Yeah, so I know something is off, _ Christen begins signing more animatedly than she usually does. _ I thought I could just shake it off. But it’s not going away and I just want to lock myself inside my room and not go out for days because I don’t know how to fix it yet. It certainly didn’t help that we lost our first game of the season midweek then had a scoreless draw earlier. And to think we started out great in the quarterfinals! Plus seeing you now reminds me that I just want your cuddles and that I need your cuddles—last weekend was the best I’ve ever slept in months! And I can’t even have your cuddles… _

_ Sweetheart, I miss your cuddles, too, _ Tobin sighs and racks her brain for something else to say or do. A moment later, she asks, _ Can you get your planner? You travel with it, right? _

Christen’s eyebrows furrow, _ Yes, I always have it with me. _

_ Please get it, _Tobin requests before she starts rummaging around her desk.

Christen holds her planner up for Tobin to see.

Tobin grins and shows a large, monthly desk planner of her own.

Christen (finally) laughs, _ Okay, what are we doing with these? _

_ We’re scheduling our online dates, _ Tobin grins some more.

Christen beams and raises an eyebrow, _ Dates? _

_ Yes, dates. Fika dates, breakfast dates, lunch dates, dinner dates, Netflix dates, Netflix and chill dates, all sorts of dates! _

Christen opens her planner with a big smile, _ Are you free tomorrow? _

_ Heck, yeah, I’m free tomorrow! _

Christen giggles, _ What do you want to do for our date tomorrow? _

_ Want to watch Glee with me? _Tobin smirks.

And the way Christen keeps smiling for the rest of the call makes Tobin’s suggestion, oh, so worth it.

*

When the glee club’s (competition) performance is in full swing on episode 13 of Glee (the next day), Christen looks absolutely smitten. (Again.)

That’s how Tobin finds Christen looking at her when there are no subtitles or lyrics to read on the screen and she glances at the minimized Skype window on the side.

Christen, of course, sings along with the next song, _ “You can’t always get what you want… You can’t always get what you want… But if you try sometimes… you’ll find… you get what you need!” _

Then they both bang their heads to the beat, with goofy smiles and chuckles and everything in between.

Christen seems overjoyed at the sight of Tobin (finally) enjoying one of her favorite TV shows. Tobin is just overjoyed at the sight of Christen overjoyed.

By the time the episode’s last song comes on, they’re both dancing in their seats with unrestrained delight.

_ “‘Cause we belong together now, yeah… Forever united here somehow, yeah… You got a piece of me… And honestly… My life… would suck… without you…” _

*

Christen is in good spirits throughout the week. And after winning their second Swedish League game in midweek and the second leg of the semi finals that Sunday (which means Tyresö is going back to the Champions League final for the second year in a row), Christen is just… glowing.

_ Did you score? _Tobin asks with a grin.

_ A brace, my love, _ Christen beams. _ But that’s not all. _

_ Ooh, what else? _

_ I figured out what was stressing me out last week. _

_ Which was? _

_ The lack of training time with Tyresö—exacerbated by the travel and the number of games I played—meant that I wasn’t… flowing… with the rest of the team, which worried me. A lot. _

_ And this week, you did—you flowed. _

_ Yes, we all did… But that’s not all. _

_ I like this a lot— _

They both giggle.

_ —getting multiple good news. Okay, what else? _Tobin prompts.

_ I made the roster for the friendly against Canada in Canada on May 6th. _

_ Oh, oh, I read about that on the US Soccer website! _

_ I’m flying over this coming Friday after our third game of the season. _

_ Nice! Virtual high five, baby! _

Christen giggles again and high fives Tobin through the webcam, _ But that’s not all. _

_ There’s more? _

Christen nods with a shit-eating grin.

_ What? What? _

_ I’ll be allocated to Chicago in June! I just signed a contract with US Soccer!!! _

_ You’re coming home?! _Tobin’s mouth drops open, mid-ecstasy.

_ I’m coming home!!! _

Tobin stands up so fast she upends her chair, _ You’re coming home!!! _

Christen laughs gleefully.

And Tobin starts jumping around her room and on her bed, shouting gibberish and signing, _ Chicago, baby!!! Yeah!!! _

*

There’s no shortage of grins at the Press household later that evening.

It’s the day after Stacy’s birthday, Channing has just returned from India and, with Christen’s impending return from Sweden, they have much to celebrate.

Tobin immediately says yes when the Press Pack asks her to stay for a nightcap.

*

She brings Lauren up-to-date in their kitchen the next night, _ You were right. _

_ I’m sorry, can you sign that again? _Lauren asks.

_ You were right. _

_ I got it the first time, _ Lauren smirks. _ I just wanted you to repeat it. _

_ Don’t be a jerk. _

Lauren laughs, _ What’s up? What was I right about? _

_ US Soccer signed Christen. _

“Oh, my God.”

Tobin grins, _ She’ll start playing for the Chicago Red Stars in June! _

“Oh, my, God! Tobs!” Lauren grabs Tobin by the shoulders and they start jumping for joy. “Why aren’t you freaking out?!”

_ I already freaked out yesterday!! _

“Oh, my gosh! I’m so happy for Chris! I’m so happy for you!”

They start laughing as they tire out from jumping. And when they stop, they hug as they continue laughing.

And when their laughter fades, Lauren gives Tobin a knowing look, _ What are you gonna do now? _

Tobin gives her an uneasy smile, _ I’ve been applying for jobs in cities with NWSL teams. Now, I guess I’ll focus on applying in Chicago and nearby cities. _

Lauren gives her a proud smile, _ Look at you growing up even more. I never thought I’d see the day. _

_ Shut up. _

They laugh again.

_ Is that okay? _ Tobin asks. _ Me thinking of moving? _

_ You aren’t the only one thinking of following their partner. _

_ Yeah? _

Lauren nods solemnly, _ Jrue and I have been talking about wanting to start a family in a year or two. And it’s unlikely that he’ll get picked by one of the LA teams. So I’m seriously considering moving with him after he gets drafted in June. _

_ Where do you think he’ll be? _

_ We all think he’s headed to Philadelphia or New Orleans. _

_ Cool. Have you started looking for work there? _

_ Well, that’s another thing to consider. _

_ Getting a new job? _

_ Or staying at home. _

_ That’s an option for you? _

_ Jrue tells me it is. _

_ Because he’ll be making a ridiculous amount of money? _

_ We’re talking millions of dollars. _

_ Fudge! Why do athletes earn so much? _

_ Male athletes. Women athletes unfortunately don’t earn as much. _

_ So Christen isn’t earning a cool million? _

_ You know how women make 78 cents to every dollar the men make? _

Tobin nods.

_ Well, it’s even worse in sports. Regular players in the NWSL earn just as much as we do. Christen probably earns triple that amount, which is definitely far from a million. _

_ So, like, a hundred grand? _

_ Or thereabouts. _

_ Dang, I need a better paying job. _

_ Don’t think about that, Tobin. _

_ You’d make a great wife and mom, you know, _ Tobin smiles, _ whether you decide to stay at home or not. _

_ Thanks, _ Lauren smiles back, _ I could say the same about you. _

_ Thanks. _

_ So, Chicago? _

_ I really hope so, _ Tobin sighs. _ Has Jrue officially proposed yet? _

_ He needs to get those millions first. _

They share one look and bust out laughing again.

*

Tobin lies wide awake in bed a few hours later, at 11pm.

She heaves a sigh, turns on her lamp, rests her back against the wall, and fixes her phone on its holder.

[Tobin]  
_ Babe  
_ _ Are you awake?  
_ _ I can’t sleep _

She only waits a couple of seconds before her phone vibrates with a call from Christen.

_ Sweetheart, _Christen greets Tobin from her desk with a soft, sleep-addled smile.

Tobin gazes at her with warm adoration, _ You look beautiful. _

_ Did you want me to call just to tell me that? _

_ Maybe. _

Christen beams, _ I’m happy to see your beautiful face, too. _

Tobin gives her a lop-sided smile.

_ Why can’t you sleep, my love? _Christen asks with great affection.

Tobin shrugs, _ I don’t really know. _

_ Is something on your mind? _

_ It’s kind of… blank? _

_ But you’re feeling… bothered or anxious? _

Tobin nods, _ And excited at the same time. _

_ What are you excited about? _

_ You… coming home. _

Christen smiles, _ I’m excited about that, too. I’m surprised I haven’t started counting the days. _

_ 34 days. _

_ What? _

_ I’ve started counting. There are 34 days between now and June 1st. _

_ Baby, I’m not sure I’ll be home on June 1st. _

_ I know. But you’ll be home by June and it’s the start of June. _

_ That is true, _ Christen smiles tenderly. _ What’s bothering you, my love? _

_ I don’t know. _

_ Okay, then, what are you afraid of? _

The question makes Tobin pause.

Christen figures it was the right question to ask, so she waits… 

Finally, Tobin answers, _ I’m scared I won’t be able to find a way to be with you. _

_ What do you mean? _

_ I just… want to be where you are… and I’m starting to feel kind of… desperate? Like it’s not just about missing you anymore. _

Christen is rarely speechless but she is now, _ My love… _

_ Yes, my love… _

Christen seems to be formulating the best response in the seconds that follow… which feel like an… eternity… _ Do you remember what we talked about in MB Post? About what’s important? _

_ Staying together—we agreed that staying together is what’s important… and details are secondary. _

Christen nods, _ Do you still believe that? _

Tobin nods, without hesitation, then takes a deep breath, _ It would be super nice, though… to only be a drive away from you again and not a flight away. _

_ Yes, it would… but, sweetheart, we also promised each other— _

_ We will love each other— _

_ Wherever we will be. _

Tobin nods again, _ I’m keeping that promise, my love. _

_ So am I. _

_ Please don’t doubt that, okay? _

_ Okay… _

_ I think I’ve never wanted anything so bad before—being with you, following you to Chicago… _

_ I know exactly how you feel… but I don’t know exactly what to say… Do you want to… pray with me? _Christen asks shyly.

Tobin beams, _ Thank you… Are you… done with your morning meditation? _

_ Not yet. _

_ Because you called me? _

Christen nods again.

_ I’m sorry. _

_ Don’t be. I’m not. _

_ Okay, then, can we meditate so I can sleep and you can start your day right? _

_ Yes, of course, _ Christen smiles. _ But I’ve already started my day right by calling you. _

_ Wow, _ Tobin smiles back, _ she’s got lines now. _

Christen beams, _ Tobin. _

_ Yes, love. _

_ I love you. _

_ I love you, Chris. _

*

Tobin throws herself into finding job opportunities in and around Chicago everyday.

She starts by checking applications she sent in February, listing them down in a notebook, crossing out some and making follow ups with the rest. 

Then she applies to new job postings within a 50-mile radius of Chicago.

Then she expands her search a couple of days later to cities that are two to three hours away.

Not long after, she starts looking through cities that are four to five hours away and submits applications there, too.

She even puts in applications for jobs in cities that are six to eight hours away later on.

By mid-May, after almost three weeks of job hunting and with the horrible Friday traffic she experienced the whole day, she asks for Lauren’s opinion on half-day drives.

Lauren gasps, _ Are you serious? _

_ What? _

_ Do you remember when we drove from Jersey to DC? _

_ Yeah? _

_ Google maps told us it would just be under four hours. But how long did it actually take us? Six hours. _

_ So? _

_ If the map tells you that it’s 12 hours away, it could easily be an 18-hour drive. _

Tobin makes a face and lets out a grumbling sigh.

_ What’s the furthest from Chicago you’ve applied to? _Lauren asks.

_ I don’t know, _ Tobin shrugs. _ Pittsburgh? Kansas City? _

“Oh, Tobin.” _ Those could be half-day drives away. _

_ But do you think I could handle it? The really long drive. _

Lauren sighs, _ Yes, I think you could. But you shouldn’t submit applications in cities further than those two, okay? _

_ Okay. _

_ Have you heard from any of the companies you applied to so far? _

Tobin sadly shakes her head, _ Perry asked the same thing yesterday. Even my former editor checked in and asked if I found a new job because she hasn’t received any reference calls. I’m glad Christen doesn’t ask about it. _

_ Maybe because it doesn’t matter to her. _

_ What do you mean? _

_ I mean maybe it really doesn’t matter to her where you’ll be because she’s willing to go to you. I think, aside from getting a more secure spot on the national team, she’s just happy she’ll be back in the States to be closer to you and have the ability to get on a flight anytime… to get to where you are… _

*

Gone are the days when Tobin agonizes over a missed video call or a missed opportunity for a video call with Christen.

So far, this May, they’ve gone a total of six days without seeing and talking to each other through Skype or WhatsApp. 

There’s May 1st, with Christen traveling from Stockholm to Winnipeg for the friendly against Canada… 

…May 7th, with Christen traveling back to Sweden after the 1-1 draw… 

…May 17th, with Christen traveling to Berlin, Germany for the Champions League final… 

…May 18th, with Christen spending quality time with the Press Pack, who flew to Berlin to support her and watch the final…

…May 22nd, with Christen traveling back to Sweden after their 2-1 loss…

…And today, May 26th, with Christen traveling to somewhere hard to spell, or so she says, but promising Tobin that she’ll make it to their scheduled breakfast date tomorrow.

*

Tobin dreams.

Tobin dreams of Christen as she lies half-asleep in bed at dawn the next morning.

She knows it’ll be time to get up soon but dream Christen is caressing her arm… her chest… her waist… then lying on top of her and—oof—it feels so real—Christen’s weight on top of her… Christen’s lips against her lips, kissing her gently… lovingly… again and again… 

No, Tobin doesn’t want to wake up just yet. Dream Christen is kissing her. Dream Christen is kissing her and she can feel it. But she can also feel Christen laughing on top of her, then kissing her closed eyelids—No, Tobin doesn’t want to open them yet.

All of a sudden, Christen leaves and Tobin feels the weight off her body—her arms instinctively reach out. With a jerk, she’s falling off her bed—her eyes instinctively open. But she doesn’t fall. Because real life Christen catches her. With a highly amused smile and eyes twinkling with mirth.

Tobin freezes, then blinks with her mouth agape.

And Christen giggles before helping her lie back on her bed, kneeling beside her, cupping her face with both hands, and leaning down to kiss her again. And when Christen pulls away and Tobin continues to stare in disbelief, Christen greets her with a smile, “Goob morning, love.” 

Tobin glances at the clock on her nightstand, then back at Christen, then back at the clock. The time hasn’t changed.

Christen giggles again and tells her, _ Baby, you’re not dreaming. I’m really here. _

A smile finally blooms on Tobin’s lips, with her face full of wonder and her hands reaching out to cup Christen’s face and her eyes roaming over Christen’s sweatsuit-covered body.

“Hi babe,” Christen beams.

And Tobin’s smile turns into a shit-eating grin before she pulls Christen down tenderly for a longer… proper… fuller… juicier… homecoming kiss… 

Their lips linger after parting, still touching, the same way their noses brush against each other, as they take a moment to catch their breaths.

Tobin feels the smile on Christen’s lips and her lips follow suit.

Then Christen kisses her again, giggling. And Tobin can’t help but giggle, too. And flip them over. And pepper Christen’s face with kisses. And place her bent knees on either side of Christen’s hips. And slide her hands under Christen’s sweatshirt. And wiggle down Christen’s body until she can rest her head on Christen’s right boob and tilt her head just right so she can gaze at Christen’s face but still cling to Christen’s body. Tightly. Like a koala.

Christen laughs. And oh, how Christen laughs… at Tobin’s self-satisfied grin… at Tobin’s antics… at Tobin’s cuteness… 

And when her laughter turns into intermittent giggles, she starts running her fingers through Tobin’s hair then asks, “Do you know what day it is today?”

Tobin gives a noncommittal nod.

“I don’t think you remember. But I’ll tell you.”

Tobin shrugs as if to say, _ Okay. _

Christen smiles, “It’s the day we met.”

Tobin’s eyebrows furrow as she turns away from Christen for a second, thinking back to last year. And suddenly, her eyes widen a little and she looks at Christen like she remembers then nods vigorously as if to say, _ Yes, it is! _

Christen beams, “Happy first year of knowing each other, babe.”

Tobin grins some more, lifts her head off Christen’s boob, and pours all her gratefulness into a kiss that leaves both of them… breathless… 

“Babe…” Christen cups Tobin’s face.

Tobin gives her an expectant look.

“Go shower.”

Tobin pouts.

Christen giggles again, “I’m not going anywhere… at least for a few days…” 

Tobin narrows her eyes like she’s considering it.

“I’ll prepare breakfast in bed.”

Tobin still doesn’t let go.

So Christen gives her another kiss then a teasing smile, “I promise to make it worth your while.” 

Tobin rolls her eyes as if to say she really doesn’t want to leave her bed right now but her tickled smile says otherwise.

“The sooner you go, the sooner you can come back to bed.”

Tobin fake-grumbles as Christen laughs. Then Tobin goes for another peck and jumps out of bed.  
*  
Christen isn’t in the kitchen when Tobin gets out of the shower wrapped in her towel so she goes to her room, thinking breakfast is ready.

And boy, is it ready.

She finds Christen lying on her side, propped up on one elbow, with her shoulders and her arms exposed and the rest of her body hidden under the covers.

Tobin locks the door and doesn’t get to second-guess what’s waiting for her between the sheets because Christen throws the cover off her body and smirks… in all her naked glory.

Tobin drops her towel on the floor in a heartbeat.

*

When Christen picks Tobin up at the hub that afternoon and gets out of her car… when Tobin runs towards her after spotting her… when Tobin grabs her by the waist and they kiss each other thoroughly then grin like fools… when Christen asks Tobin to drive them home… when they both open the car doors for each other and kiss again once they’re seated… and when Tobin starts driving with one hand on the steering wheel and the other holding Christen’s hand, it feels as if no time has passed at all… 

*

They catch up with Lauren over a healthy take-out dinner that night.

Tobin learns that Channing met with Lauren days ago to get the spare key to their apartment to give to Christen and Channing also picked Christen up from LAX this morning and brought her home (to shower and get her car).

Lauren asks how Tobin reacted to seeing Christen this morning and they all have a good laugh before she asks how Christen managed to make an LA pitstop before reporting in Chicago.

_ I’m shooting a promo for Wheaties tomorrow, _Christen answers.

“Nice,” Lauren gives her a high five.

_ Can I call in sick so I can be there? _Tobin asks.

_ No, you can’t, _Christen signs.

_ Why not??? _

_ Because it’s your birthday in two days. _

_ What does that have to do with me calling in sick tomorrow? _

Christen suddenly looks guilty, _ Okay, baby, don’t get mad. _

_ Christen Press, what did you do? _

Christen winces, _ I’m throwing you a birthday party this Friday night at my parents’ house. _

_ You are? _

Christen nods.

_ So why can’t I call in sick? _

_ I… invited your manager? _

Tobin pouts and stomps her feet, _ But I wanna watch the shoot! _

_ You can be at the next one. _

_ Like, for Nike? _

Christen laughs, _ Or maybe for something else, like a magazine. _

_ Fine, I’ll hold you to that. But do we really have to celebrate my birthday? _

_ Yes!!! _

*

Tobin wakes up on her birthday with Christen’s hand between her legs.

(As far as she’s concerned, it’s the only celebration that counts.)

*

Two hours later, Tobin laughs when she finds two boxes for Christen while loading her van.

[Tobin]  
_ Are these boxes for the party   
_ _ tonight? _

[Christen]  
_ Maybe I’m just feeling   
_ _ nostalgic _

[Tobin]  
_ Lol _

[Christen]  
_ Or maybe I just want to bring   
_ _ you to the kitchen so we can   
_ _ make out some more ;) _

*

Tobin laughs again when she pulls up in front of the Press house and sees Christen walking towards the van with two balloons (in pink and orange) tied to her wrist, a party hat on her head, and a huge ribbon on her chest.

They’re grinning from ear to ear when they meet behind the van. And Christen wastes no time in wrapping her arms around Tobin’s neck and giving her a smiley, lively, hearty, fiery kiss… which turns their grins into dreamy smiles.

_ Are you my birthday present? _Tobin asks.

_ I am, _Christen nods adorably.

_ Can you be my birthday future, too? _

Christen laughs heartily, _ I love you. _

Tobin leans in for another kiss, _ I love you. _

Christen puts in another peck or two, _ How does it feel to be old? _

Tobin laughs, _ I’m not old! I’m 27! _

_ Just three more years and you’ll be 30. _

_ I’m literally just seven months older than you. _

_ Yes, but right now, I’m only 26, _ Christen sticks her tongue out then pushes Tobin to open the back of her van to grab the boxes. _ So which box is heavier? _

Tobin points at one box.

_ Okay, you take that one, _ Christen laughs again. _ I’ll get the other. _

Tobin shakes her head but smiles in amusement, _ Yes, your hotness. Anything you want, your hotness. _

Christen playfully smacks Tobin’s arm before Tobin hands her the lighter box. Then she gives Tobin another kiss before she walks inside, with Tobin following her and enjoying the view.  
*  
They do end up making out in the kitchen.

And when they finally come up for air, Christen says, “I want to keep kissing you… but I also want you to be home early tonight…”

_ One more minute, _Tobin asks.

“Okay, one more minute,” Christen readily agrees. 

And they giggle into another kiss… 

*

Everyone who matters to Tobin in LA is at the party: the whole Press pack, Lauren and Jrue, Dave, her manager and co-worker friends, and Jon Aguirre. (Mrs. O was invited but couldn’t make it).

Keanu shows up later that evening and, naturally, everyone collectively loses their minds.

*

_ Did you enjoy your party? _Christen asks as they lie in bed sideways, facing each other, naked.

_ I did, _ Tobin beams and kisses Christen for the nth time today. _ Thank you, baby. I can’t believe Keanu showed up. _

They giggle as Christen reveals, _ Lauren simply sent his agent an email with your photo from the accident and the address to my parents’ house. _

_ That’s all it took? _

_ Apparently. _

They both laugh.

_ I have one more present for you, _Christen signs timidly.

_ Seriously? Baby, I’ve got all I need right here, _Tobin runs her hand across Christen’s back.

_ Promise me you won’t get mad when you see it? _

_ That’s the second time you’ve asked me that since you came home. And I didn’t get mad the first time. _

_ This one might get you mad… so please don’t get mad. _

_ Okay. _

Christen gives Tobin a quick kiss and gets her phone from the nightstand… then shows Tobin two e-tickets… 

_ I’m going to Chicago with you? _

_ And helping me move into my new apartment? _

_ Oh, I see how it is. You just want me for my body. _

_ Well, yes… for manual and sexual labor. _

They snort at the same time and burst into laughter then lean in for another kiss… 

_ I wanted to buy a ticket to Chicago to visit you, _ Tobin confesses. _ I was just waiting for you to tell me when you’d be there. But you didn’t. _

_ I’m sorry… I really wanted to surprise you for your birthday. _

_ It’s okay. I’m not mad. I’m so happy that you’re here. And I guess now I’m entitled to one more surprise that I could pay for. _

_ What are you talking about? Doesn’t this make us even since you bought a ticket to Jersey? _

_ Half a ticket. And no, it doesn’t make us even because you paid for our staycation last December. _

_ But that was for my birthday! _

_ Whatever. I’m still entitled to one surprise. _

_ Oh, fine. You owe me one staycation then. _

_ Deal. _

_ Deal. _

_ Kiss on it? _

_ Better have sex on it to be sure. _

They giggle as they kiss again.

But Tobin suddenly pulls away, _ Wait, when are we leaving? _

_ This Sunday, May 31st. _

_ And when is my return flight? _

_ Thursday, June 4th. _

_ So I’ll just… skip work? _

_ Baby, I called your manager before coming home to get your paid time off approved. _

_ And he approved? Just like that? _

Christen nods, _ It’s why I invited him to the party. _

_ You’re so freaking sexy, you know that? _

_ I seem to have forgotten. Why don’t you remind me? _

Tobin does just that (with her mouth, her hands, and other parts of her body). 

And Christen forgets both their names.

*

_ What are you thinking about? _Christen asks Tobin as their plane to Chicago reaches cruising altitude.

_ Us joining the mile-high club someday, _Tobin smirks.

_ Baby, the lavatories are disgusting. _

_ Not in the lavatories. Jeez. Some airlines have private cabins, right? _

A delicious smile slowly spreads across Christen’s face, mirrored by Tobin’s, as their eyes lock. “Okay, someday…”

_ Someday, _Tobin repeats before holding Christen’s hand.

Christen wistfully stares at the clouds from her window seat and leans her head back on Tobin’s shoulder.

Tobin’s smile doesn’t leave her face as she looks down at their clasped hands before bringing them up to her lips… to kiss the back of Christen’s hand.

Christen turns to her and tries to sign without letting her hand go, _ Thank you for coming with me. _

Tobin does the same, _ Thank you for taking me with you. _

She realizes that she’ll gladly go through hating airports (and airplanes) most of the time if she occasionally gets moments like this when she absolutely loves them.

*

As it turns out, the only real manual labor Tobin needs to do is help maneuver a newly delivered queen-sized mattress from the living room wall of Christen’s apartment… through an archway (to the kitchen)… across the narrow hallway… and into the bedroom.

Other than that, her next orders of business are making the bed (because #priorities) and endeavoring to help make the semi-furnished apartment <strike>cleaner</strike> spotless while Christen is away to officially receive her Chicago Red Stars jersey, try it on for the first time, and pose for photos.

She sends Tobin a photo of her in her mostly-red, zipped-up Chicago Red Stars jacket, with her hair down, swept to one side.

[Christen]  
_ How do I look? _

[Tobin]  
_ Red hot!!! ;) _

[Christen]  
_ :D :D :D _

They play excited, happy tourists for the rest of the day, driving around in their rental car and visiting Grant Park.

And they end their first night in Chicago by breaking in the new mattress.

“Thank you for being here, my love.”

_ I’m happy to be here, my love. I really wanted you to have an easy ‘first night away’ for a change. _

*

Christen goes to her first training session with the team the next day, leaving Tobin at the apartment to write her assigned article.

Five hundred words in and an email from her former editor comes through that renders her immobile for several minutes on the couch.

She struggles to finish writing her assigned article after that.

*

_ Honey, I’m home! _Christen beams at Tobin as she enters the apartment.

Tobin grins, quickly getting off the couch and walking over to Christen to give her a kiss, _ How was practice, my love? _

_ It was good. _

_ And your teammates? _

_ They’re all nice, thank goodness. _

_ Anyone I’ve met? _

_ Yes! Julie! Or JJ—one of our rookies. _

_ Oh yeah, I remember her! She’s one of the ‘new’ new kids, right? _

_ Yes. _

_ Any cute teammates? _

_ Several. _

Tobin pouts.

Christen laughs, swiftly throwing her arms around Tobin’s neck and giving her a kiss, “None as cute as you, babe.”

Tobin rolls her eyes, holds Christen closer, and takes a moment to simply gaze at her before leaning in for another kiss.

But when they pull apart, Christen cups her face with both hands, studies her, and asks, “What’s wrong?”

_ What? _

“Something’s bothering you… I can see it in your eyes.”

Tobin takes a deep breath and heaves an even deeper sigh… Then she takes Christen’s hands off her face and holds them as she leads Christen to the couch, pulls Christen down to sit, and lifts Christen’s legs over to her lap.

Christen smiles, leans in for another kiss, and waits.

Tobin sighs again, then grabs her phone, pulls up the email she received earlier, and hands it over to Christen.

“From your former editor?” Christen checks after taking the phone.

Tobin nods and stares as Christen reads the email with her eyebrows furrowed. And Tobin doesn’t miss the split-second when Christen’s eyes go from hopeful to serious.

Christen scans the email again before taking a deep breath and breaking her silence, “Babe, she’s offering you a job.”

_ Yes, but in Portland, Chris, _Tobin replies glumly. 

Christen puts the phone down to sign,_ You’re not inclined to accept it? _

_ What am I gonna do in Portland? You won’t be there. I don’t know anyone there. _

_ Yes, you do… You’ve met Alex and Becky. I’ll ask for their help. I know Becky likes you. _

_ I thought Becky plays in Kansas City. _

_ She does but she goes home to her boyfriend in Portland in the off-season. _

_ You go home to LA in the off-season. _

_ I’ll take that extra flight for you. _

_ That’s the thing. You shouldn’t have to. I can stay in LA. And if I really can’t get a news job here or in nearby cities, I’ll try applying for a transfer and deliver here instead. _

_ Will that make you happy in the long run? _

_ I’ll be with you. _

_ I think you’ll be happy for a while but feel awful after—kind of like how you’d feel if you’d gone to Sweden with a ticket I paid for. _

_ You don’t want me to move here with you? _

_ I want nothing more… But if you were here, we still wouldn’t be together all the time. I could still be gone three to four weeks at a time. I could be removed from the federation in a year. I could be traded. Your offer feels like it could be long-term. _

_ Why are you trying to convince me to go to Portland? _

_ Because I feel like I should. Because it’s a great opportunity and I don’t want you to miss it just because it’s not where I am. Because I’ve got my dream and I want you to have yours. You still want to be a journalist, right? _

Tobin sighs, _ Yes. _

_ And would this role be a good starting point? _

_ Yes. _

_ Where you could work your way into becoming Pulitzer Prize or Peabody Award winner Tobin Heath or National Geographic photographer Tobin Heath? _

Tobin can’t help but smile at that, _ That actually sounds awesome, World Champion Christen Press. _

_ I’m serious. _

_ I know you are. _

_ Please consider it, my love. _

_ Okay, I’ll sleep on it. _

_ I can help clear your mind if you want, _Christen smirks.

Tobin smirks back, wondering at the back of her mind why all decisions can’t be as easy as this, _ I want.  
_*

  
  



	8. Best for you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic was written for a reason. That we may be more open and curious about our Deaf siblings. That we may realize we have more things in common than not. Now, I hope we can extend the same openness, curiosity, and, ultimately, support for our Black siblings, who need us at this time.
> 
> This fic also has random acts of kindness for a reason. And while I continue to advocate doing these acts regularly to anyone, it's time to be intentional. If you can donate, thank you. If you can protest, thank you and stay safe. Covid is still very much a threat. But if you can do neither, please remember that no act is too small to change the world. We can educate ourselves. Re-educate ourselves. Watch YouTube videos without skipping ads to help fund Black Lives Matter. We can reach out to our Black classmates, neighbors, co-workers, strangers at the grocery and ask how we can be better allies.
> 
> I know that we come here for various reasons. To escape. To live vicariously through characters we love. To squee. I hope this fic brings you joy. So here's chapter 8. Please enjoy.

Tobin could just stay right here forever… in Christen’s arms… 

…in a bed that feels like theirs, in a room with a view of the river and the skyline, in a cozy apartment, in downtown Chicago.

Yes, Tobin could just stay right here… nestled on top of Christen’s chest, hips settled between Christen’s legs, hands tucked under Christen’s shoulders, face burrowed into Christen’s neck… 

Tobin could just stay right here, with Christen… caressing her back with one hand, massaging her scalp with the other, threading fingers through her hair, folding a leg against her hip… placing kisses on her forehead, her nose, her cheek, the corner of her eye… then gazing at her like she hung the moon… and the stars… 

“A penny for your thoughts, my love…”

Tobin lifts her head to give Christen a kiss so gentle… and warm and loving, it makes Christen smile before she rolls them both to lie on their sides and pulls away just far enough for them to sign but keeps her leg on Tobin’s hip for them to stay connected.

_ Wouldn’t it be nice to get to do this everyday, _ Tobin smiles a hopeful smile, _ to come home to each other… talk about each other’s day and sleep holding each other… wake up next to each other, kissing each other? _

_ Yes, it would, _ Christen smiles back, then chuckles a little. _ You know… that phrase always makes me think of Hawaii. _

_ Which phrase? _

_ Wouldn’t it be nice. _

Tobin doesn’t seem to get the reference.

_ It’s from a movie? When we were 16? Never mind. Let’s just leave everything and move to Hawaii. _

_ Okay! _ Tobin quickly agrees, beaming. _ What would we do in Hawaii? _

_ You could pursue your lifelong dream of becoming a professional surfer. _

_ Rad. What about you? What would you work on? _

_ My one true love. _

Tobin narrows her eyes, _ Chocolate? _

_ Coffee. _

They both giggle before Tobin asks, _ What about our kids? _

_ Could we really handle more than one surfer kid in Hawaii? _

_ Okay, maybe not. We could move back to the suburbs near our friends with our three kids. _

_ Three? _

_ We could carry one each and adopt another? _

_ Okay. _

_ But two of them look so much like you, people would often think I’m kidnapping them when I pick them up from school. _

Christen giggles again, _ You’d be a stay at home mom? _

_ I could totally do it. _

_ Of course, being a book author and all. _

_ Oh, yeah? _

Christen nods with a grin, _ What would I do? _

_ You’d manage your own yoga and wellness studio. _

Christen grins even wider, _ That sounds perfect. _

_ Isn’t it? _Tobin matches her grin.

_ What a life that would be… _Christen’s grin softens as she sighs, with a dreamy, faraway look in her eyes.

Tobin smiles just as softly when she leans in to start placing kisses from Christen’s arm to Christen’s shoulder, to Christen’s neck, to Christen’s waiting mouth… 

And when she pulls away, they take a minute to gaze lovingly at each other and tuck each other’s hair behind each other’s ears. 

But something akin to regret appears in Christen’s eyes. 

“I’m sorry I can’t give it to you yet… the kind of life we dream of… not until I retire from playing, which is still a couple of years away…” 

Tobin shakes her head gently and gives Christen another kiss before lying sideways on the bed again to sign, _ All in good time, my love… I’ll wait for it… for you… But we can have a piece of it now that you’re back. We can be together here. _

_ If you were here, we’d only get to have a few days or a week or two weeks at a time because I’d be constantly flying out for away games and national team camps. It wouldn’t be that much different if you were in Portland. _

_ If I were here, chances are… we’d be together more often than if I were Portland. _

_ That’s true, _Christen relents with a sigh.

_ So can I say no to Portland, and keep looking and waiting for an opportunity here, and move, _ Tobin offers the most adorable smile she can muster, _ and then be your roommate? _

Christen tries her best to suppress a smile. 

_ I’m quite handy to be around, you know, _ Tobin continues, with her irresistible smile turning more playful by the second. _ Also, kind of handsy. _

Christen almost snorts.

Tobin looks mighty pleased with herself, _ Think of it, my love. I can be your personal grocery shopper, you driver, your cook, your carpenter, your plumber, your all-around handyman. _

Christen gives in and smiles as she shakes her head.

Tobin waggles her eyebrows, _ And I can be in costume if you want. _

Christen laughs and in a flash, she’s cupping Tobin’s face, pushing Tobin onto her back, straddling her, and kissing her… hard and breathy… 

And there’s a naughty glint in her eyes when she pulls away just far enough to take a good look at Tobin, all dopey and breathless from their kiss.

“Role-playing aside,” she flips her hair to one side, with one hand slowly brushing strands of hair away from her nape, “you know what would be… a better idea?” 

Tobin slowly raises her eyebrows, still very much in a daze, with her hands on Christen’s waist.

“How about waiting,” Christen moves further away and starts leisurely running her hands up and down Tobin’s chest, “for an opportunity in Chicago… while gaining experience… in Portland?”

Tobin’s daze almost turns into an adorable pout. But Christen sits up with her back straight, aiming a level gaze at Tobin and looking like a goddess—Tobin can’t help but whimper at the sight.

Christen smirks, _ Wouldn’t that be… a more prudent… course of action? _

Tobin swallows thickly.

_ To bow out of a job that’s unrelated to the career you want… and not throw away what could be… a golden opportunity? _Christen tilts her head to one side, with her gaze softer, looking even more beautiful.

Tobin sighs… because of what, she doesn’t even know… 

_ I think you know that this could be your big break, my love, _ Christen adds with a whole lot of love in her eyes. _ You wouldn’t be so affected by the email otherwise… _

This time, Tobin sighs because it’s true.

Christen leans down to give her another kiss… then meets her gaze and looks at her in earnest, “Please really think it over, babe… ask your former editor for a few more days… talk to Lauren and your family…”

Tobin sighs again, then nods.

“Okay?”

Tobin nods again, then pulls Christen down for a longer, soul-stirring kiss… 

*

They spend the next two days in what might have been and what could still be… waking each other up with cuddles and kisses and giddy smiles and heart-eyes like they used to do, but after 8am, not 5am… 

…then doing all the activities in Christen’s planner from 9am to 11am, from meditation to breakfast to two different sets of exercises… 

…then, one day, driving to Lake Shore Drive and the beaches before lunch, with Christen at the wheel, turning the radio up for Tobin and singing at the top of her lungs… and, another, sitting down to discuss how much money they can set aside for their “travel fund,” choosing a bank, and opening a joint account… 

…then going on lunch dates at The Loop… and taking photos at The Bean… before Tobin drives Christen to work and they kiss each other goodbye, exchanging Thank you’s and I love you’s and ‘Have a nice day’ and ‘See you later’ and ‘Don’t have too much fun without me.’

And then Tobin is on her own.

She shops for groceries one afternoon, with a list (plus cash she reluctantly accepts) from Christen, and takes her time unpacking and putting the groceries away when she gets home… and on the other, she does the laundry and takes her time folding and storing the freshly laundered clothes in the dresser.

The rest of her alone time, she spends outlining and starting an unassigned article with the working title: _ Sex On or The Night Before Game Day, Yay or Nay? _ (To which Christen later answers with an impish grin, “I’ve done _ so _ well the past two training days, babe… but we should test it whenever we can.”)

They’re together again a little after 6pm, when Tobin arrives at the stadium to pick Christen up and bring her home.

And when they’re home, they prepare their meal together, eat dinner together, wash dishes and pots and pans together, all the while talking about their day and anything under the sun.

And when the last cookware has been put away, they pull each other close and kiss as they lean against the counter… then smile stupidly at each other… and kiss some more… 

_ What do you want to do for the rest of the evening, baby? _Tobin asks.

Christen smirks, _ I want some lovin— _

_ I’m at your service. _

Christen laughs, _ Don’t you have an article to write? _

_ I’ll continue it some other time, unless, _ Tobin pauses, _ there’s something you want to do for yourself, isn’t there? _

_ Maybe. _

_ What is it? _

Christen looks adorable when she asks, _ Can I watch Grey’s Anatomy while you write? _

Tobin laughs and shakes her head, _ You and your TV shows. _

_ You know— _

_ No, I’m not starting that, Chris. _

_ What about Scandal? _

_ No. _

_ Fine. I’ll get you to watch another show with me at some point. _

They sit in the middle of the couch, with their feet up and their arms touching, as Tobin writes her article and Christen watches an episode.

Every now and then, Christen plants a kiss on Tobin’s shoulder and Tobin responds by kissing whatever part of Christen’s head she can immediately kiss.

Less than an hour later, Tobin feels Christen heaving a deep sigh then catches her wiping away a tear before closing and putting her laptop aside and snuggling up against Tobin.

_ Sad episode? _Tobin asks before closing and putting her own laptop aside.

Christen nods and snuggles closer when Tobin wraps both arms around her and kisses the top of her head. And they stay like that for a while… until Christen tilts her head up to look at Tobin, one expectant look meeting another.

“I want my lovin’ now.” 

Tobin grins, _ Couch? _

Christen grins back, _ Then bed. _

A beat.

And they’re scrambling to get their laptops and their clothes out of the way… 

And they do it all over again the next night, on Tobin’s last night in Chicago… 

*

They’re in bed, with Christen on her back and Tobin on top and Christen gripping Tobin so tightly that spots on Tobin’s neck and Tobin’s back, where Christen’s hands are, just might bruise. And they’re panting and moaning and grunting, with sweat building up on their foreheads, on their backs, on skin touching skin, on Tobin’s left arm, flexing as she thrusts her fingers into Christen, repeatedly and rhythmically, as steadily as the way she rocks her body back and forth and grinds… against Christen’s thigh.

Christen starts to squirm. Their breaths quicken. And Tobin comes first, with a whimper and a groan. But she’s determined to keep going, pushing herself off Christen a bit further… angling her body a bit better… lifting her head up far enough, yet close enough, to look at Christen’s face and kiss her temple, her cheek, her closed eyelids, coaxing them to open. 

And then, they do.

With their eyes locked and so many emotions written on their faces—With Christen clutching Tobin’s neck and pulling her head up to be closer—With her stomach twitching, body trembling, then tensing for a split second—With her back arching, head tilting back, mouth opening wider, and eyes closing again, Christen comes.

She comes, then slumps against the bed, pulling Tobin down with one hand, holding her tighter, and reaching for her left wrist with the other, wordlessly asking her to stop—Tobin does. And when she slowly pulls her fingers out, Christen holds her breath and exhales… with a grunt, with Tobin collapsing on top of her, wiping her palm against the sheets, then holding her just as tight, and both of them breathing heavily.

Then Tobin feels a shudder. 

And she’s suddenly more aware of how their bodies feel like they’re throbbing just as wildly as their heartbeats do and how Christen hasn’t loosened her grip.

Then she feels it again. And again.

Tobin lifts her head up to check and Christen immediately turns away, covering her eyes with one hand, then her face with both hands once Tobin puts some distance between them.

And Tobin realizes it then. Christen is crying.

On instinct, Tobin kisses the backs of Christen’s hands over and over while holding Christen tighter. But it only makes Christen cry harder.

Helplessness shows on Tobin’s face as she goes on all fours, with her head hovering above Christen’s face, bent legs and right arm pressing against Christen’s sides, and left hand signing on Christen’s chest.

_ Chris, Chris… Please… Chris… _

Christen shakes her head as her body is wracked by sobs. And Tobin knows she can’t do anything but wait… for Christen’s sobs to quiet down… for Christen to open herself up again… 

And so, she waits. 

She waits while placing a one-handed _ I love you _ in the middle of Christen’s chest, then breathes a sigh of relief when Christen brings her right hand down to hold it, leaving her left hand to cover her eyes as she weeps.

She weeps and doesn’t resist when Tobin cradles her head in one arm, wraps the small of her back with another, and turns them both on their sides before draping one leg over her hip and caressing her back over and over until the tears stop.

The tears stop eventually… but the sniffles and hiccups remain as Christen finally removes her hand off her eyes and doesn’t shy away from Tobin’s gaze when Tobin peers at her, lovingly wiping tear tracks off her cheeks, then stroking her hair.

And they stare at each other for a while before Tobin moves back a little and Christen runs her fingertips along Tobin’s hairline, then cups Tobin’s face and kisses her tenderly… 

_ Did I do something wrong? _Tobin asks.

Christen shakes her head.

_ Are you… sad I’m leaving tomorrow? _

Christen nods.

_ Me, too… But… that’s not why you’re crying, is it? _

Christen hesitates but nods again.

_ Baby, please tell me, _Tobin implores.

_ I love you. _

_ And I love you. _

_ I want you to be… your own person. _

_ Okay… Is that why you want me to go to Portland? _

Christen’s lips quiver as she nods, _ I need you to make… a decision for yourself and… not for me… I don’t want… you resenting me later on… But I really think you should… grab the opportunity in Portland. _

Something about what she said brings a fresh wave of tears and Tobin just wants to know, wants to find a way to help her. _ Why are you hurting, my love? _

Christen shakes her head again as tears stream down her face.

Tobin looks at her beseechingly, _ Please, my love. _

And Christen breaks into sobs again, confessing, _ I… want… you… here… _

Tobin doesn’t know whether to laugh or cry. _ Then why do you insist that I go to Portland? _

_ Because, _ Christen answers in between sobs, _ I also want… what’s best for you… _

*

They sit in silence for a moment in the car at the airport parking around noon the next day, before Tobin kisses Christen’s hands and lets out a really long sigh… _ So this is what it feels like when you’re the one leaving? _

Christen gives her a sad smile.

_ I’m sorry, sweetheart. I didn’t know it sucked just as much as when you’re getting left behind. _

Christen absently shakes her head, then takes and kisses Tobin’s hand, before smiling a little bit brighter, _ Thank you for the past eight days, my love. _

_ Eight and a half, _Tobin smirks.

_ Okay, okay, _ Christen chuckles. _ Thank you for the past eight and a half days, plus one year. _

_ Thank you for that and everything else, my love, _ Tobin smiles. _ I hope your team wins later even if you won’t be playing. _

_ I hope so, too. Don’t forget to watch my NWSL debut on Sunday when we play in Seattle, okay? _

Tobin nods with another smirk, _ I’ll make sure Lauren looks it up and reminds me. _

Christen shakes her head as she chuckles again. Then she offers Tobin a hopeful smile, _ See you next month, my love. _

Tobin offers a playful grin, _ Kiss you next month, my love. _

Christen tries to contain her grin, _ How about kiss you soon? _

_ If by soon, you mean now, then it’s even better. _

And they giggle into one more kiss… before getting out of the car and walking to pre-departure.

*

_ Hey! How was Chicago? _ Lauren immediately asks as soon as she sees Tobin on the couch when she gets home that night. But then she sees Tobin’s woeful smile and quickly adds, _ Let me change first. Then we order Chinese. Then you’re telling me everything.  
_ *  
Tobin tells her everything.

And once the last detail has been shared, Lauren can’t help but say, “All valid points, honestly…”_ but… what does your gut tell you? _

Tobin turns away, releasing a sigh and staring into space while fiddling with the drawstrings of her shorts.

Lauren gives her a moment… before drawing her attention again, _ Hey… I know it’s hard when you want one thing but life gives you another. But you should also remember that your gut feeling hasn’t led you astray before, especially in the past year and a half. _

Tobin nods her head once, as if to say, _ Go on… _

_ It told you to throw in the towel and take the job here, _ Lauren continues, _ when your job applications were going nowhere back home. It told you to try and brighten Christen’s day when you just met. It told you to follow her advice to write an unassigned article. It told you to start applying for a new job, reach out to your former editor and ask her to be a reference. _ Lauren pauses. _ We could go on and on about the pros and cons of taking the job or not but we’d just be talking in circles. So what does your gut tell you to do? _

Tobin sighs again, _ To take the job in Portland. _

Lauren lets that sink in for a minute… before signing again, _ It’s pretty daunting, isn’t it? _

Tobin nods, _ I won’t have you or Chris with me. _

_ You’ll make new friends. _

_ Who can sign? _

_ Let’s call Lazy Princess and your other deaf friends, see if they have any Portland friends. _

Tobin sighs again, _ It’s a totally new city. _

_ I heard it’s beautiful… More importantly, I heard it’s sales-tax-free. _

_ What?! _

Lauren makes a face, _ You mean you haven't done your research since you got here?! _

_ I’ve been… ruminating! _

Lauren rolls her eyes, _ Ruminate with more info, you dummy. _

_ Okay, okay! Chris actually gave me a list of questions to ask my former editor. _

_ About benefits and stuff? _

Tobin nods again.

“Attagirl.” _ Okay, let’s see the list, then you email your former editor, and then we call our friends. _

*

Tobin calls her family before going to work the next two mornings and tells them an abridged version of what she told Lauren.

To no one’s surprise, her parents and sisters all agree that Christen is right.

*

Christen doesn’t ask if Tobin has come to a decision in their calls the next two nights (when Christen is in Seattle). But Tobin does tell Christen that she hopes to make a decision on Sunday, after mass.

She also tells Christen about her former editor’s replies to their questions, which they discuss at length, and about her deaf friends going on a mission to find a friend of a friend (or even a friend of a friend’s deaf cousin) who lives in Portland. She also mentions that her former editor gave her links to websites of active organizations for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing in Oregon.

_ That’s good, _ Christen smiles softly. _ It shows me that she cares, that she really wants you there and wants you to succeed there. _

_ You do realize I’m an attempt at diversity hiring, right? _

_ At least they’re making an effort when most companies don’t. _

_ Do you know how many people of color they have in their staff? _

_ I didn’t count. _

_ Six, my love, out of almost sixty. _

_ We’re no strangers to imagining what we could have and what we could do if we were given the same opportunities as the others, my love. Now that we’re both being given opportunities, we should take them and make the most of them. You’ll be one more person who can break down barriers and prejudices against the deaf and HoH, just like the deaf news anchor you’ve looked up to all these years. _

_ I swear, _ Tobin grins, looking absolutely smitten, _ where you lead, I will follow, Christen Press. _

_ Shut up, _Christen grins back the same way.

_ I love you. _

_ I love you. _

*

Tobin is sitting in the church pew on Sunday morning, reserving seats for Lauren and Jrue and looking so torn that an elderly woman walking through the row in front can’t help but smile kindly at her before taking a seat.

“Having a tough time, dear?” she asks.

Tobin nods before digging out her deaf card and showing it to the old woman, who keeps smiling at Tobin before holding out her hand for Tobin to take.

Tobin does and the kind old lady clasps Tobin’s hand in both of hers, then says, “My child… whatever struggle you are facing… God has already equipped you to overcome it… ‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord… ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you… plans to give you hope and a future.’”

Tobin feels the lump forming in her throat and the tears welling up in her eyes as she smiles back with everything she has and nods again.

“It’ll be alright, my darling,” the old lady beams. “Things will turn out right.”

*

Tobin feels at peace with her decision when she gets home after lunch.

And as soon as she changes clothes, Christen calls.

_ Hi, sweetheart! _Christen greets her cheerfully once she accepts the call after putting her phone on its stand on her desk.

_ Hi, my love! _ Tobin beams. _ I thought I’d only get to call after the game. _

_ I had a feeling… _

_ That I need you? _

_ That you’re happy. _

They hold each other’s loving gaze, smiling fondly at each other.

Then Christen asks, _ Will you still love me in Portland? _

Tobin is suddenly overcome with emotions, every feeling she’s been bottling up rising to the surface as she smiles with tears in her eyes, _ I love you to the moon and back, my love… _

*

The Chicago Red Stars lose to Seattle Reign FC (1-3) that evening and Christen feels a little down, not only because she didn’t score or make an assist, but mostly because she hasn’t adjusted to her new team’s style of play. The last 30 minutes of the match were also just depressing, with Chicago conceding a 1-0 lead in a span of 15 minutes. So Tobin spends the first half of their call pointing out (in detail) all the good things Christen has done in her debut, like disrupting Seattle’s play and creating Chicago’s early chances. But it doesn’t lift Christen’s mood.

Tobin tries a different tactic, _ Baby? _

_ Yes, baby. _

Tobin smirks, _ Your ass looked really good in those shorts. _

_ Oh, yeah? _ Christen finally smirks. _ Wait til you see it in a black lace number I just bought. _

Tobin’s jaw drops faster than she can think, ‘Hnnggg.’

And Christen beams. _ Sweetheart… _

_ … _

_ Close your mouth. _

Tobin does with a gulp. And Christen laughs before quickly changing the topic to Portland and asking about Tobin’s next steps, with Tobin still looking flustered when she tells Christen what date she needs to be in Portland (now that she has officially accepted the offer) and that she’ll give her two weeks’ notice in person tomorrow. 

Christen convinces her to wait a bit before buying a plane ticket and to reluctantly accept Christen’s help in finding a suitable apartment.

_ Honey, nothing too fancy, okay? _Tobin pleads.

_ I know how to haggle. _

Tobin rolls her eyes, _ I’m sure you can. But… if it’s possible, could I sublet from other deaf people? _

Christen stops to think about it, _ Okay, I’ll try to find that. But I’d rather you don’t room with strangers when you get there. How about you stay somewhere recommended by people we know first, then make some friends within the deaf community and check your options with them later? _

_ Okay, that makes sense—You’re right—Well, you’re always right. _

Christen smirks again, _ I’ve trained you well. _

Tobin rolls her eyes again, _ Yeah, yeah, you know what they say, ‘happy wife, happy life.’ _

Christen laughs, _ I hope you won’t ever forget that. _

*

Christen travels to Tampa, Florida the next day, with other teammates from the national team, for a two-game friendly against France.

Tobin, on the other hand, writes her assigned article first, exchanges emails with her current editor about her new job and how she could possibly continue writing for the online health magazine, then goes to the hub to speak with her manager and submit her resignation late in the afternoon, hoping to catch some of her coworker friends to also give them the news. And while they’re a bit sad that Tobin is leaving, they’re happy Tobin gets to pursue her dream and they all agree to go out the night of Tobin’s last day on the job to celebrate.

*

Christen is all smiles in their FaceTime call the next night, _ Honey, I may have already found you an apartment! _

_ Really?! _

_ I’ll tell you all about it once we get approval from the landlord to sublet and I have photos to share. I really hope you’ll like it. It’s a little over a mile to your new office downtown, accessible by bus and train, and in a really nice neighborhood. Not to mention it’ll only be almost half your current rent. _

_ What?! Honey, you’re the best!! _

Christen grins, _ You were doubtful the other day but I forgive you and will accept kisses as payment. _

Tobin laughs, then asks, _ You mean full body kisses, right? _

And Christen laughs.

*

Tobin is over the moon two days later when Christen confirms the landlord’s approval and sends her photos of the room and the apartment’s common spaces, which are way better than she expected. _ It already has a bed and a desk! This is so awesome! _

_ You like it? _Christen asks.

_ I do! Thank you, my love! _

Christen beams, _ Want me to schedule a call with your new roommates? Or one of them, at least. _

_ Yes, please. _

Then Christen tells her she should book a flight for June 22nd (so that her new roommates can pick her up from the airport), which she does straight away. 

Now, all that’s left is packing… and saying goodbye.

*

The Press Pack throws a casual dinner party for Tobin that Sunday, with Tyler bringing the appetizers, Fran bringing two bottles of wine, Lauren and Jrue bringing two cakes for dessert, and Cody, Stacy, and Channing preparing three dishes, plus a salad.

Tobin has been extra cuddly since arriving at the Press house after lunch to help prepare the food since they didn’t let her bring anything.

She hugs Stacy and Cody a little bit too long when they give her an REI shopping bag, with a really cool rain jacket inside.

She stands next to Channing in the kitchen, with an arm around her shoulder and Channing’s arm around her back, as they mourn the (official) end of Tyresö Football Club once Tyler arrives.

She sits snugly between Fran and Tyler on the patio sofa as they enjoy the appetizers and their first glasses of wine, discussing the national team’s first match against France yesterday, including Christen’s assist to Sydney (for the lone goal of the match), and speculating how Alex’s return from injury will affect their minutes.

Tobin doesn’t want to miss out on any of the conversations around the dinner table, so she eats slowly, with Lauren translating for her when needed. They talk about the NBA Draft with Jrue, wedding stuff with Tyler, being part of the HBO legal team with Fran, and creating a website with Channing, among other things.

Then, the conversation turns to her and her move to Portland and she finds herself asking everyone through her app, “Will you… come and… visit me?”

They all start talking over each other. “Of course, we’ll visit.” “I’ve always wanted to check out the Pacific Northwest.” “We need to keep Portland weird.” “Tax-free shopping!” 

Then Stacy tells her with a smile, “You’re also welcome to come home to us anytime, Tobs.” 

*

Tobin tries to keep her emotions in check when she starts packing the next day after writing her assigned article. 

And by late afternoon, she absentmindedly calls Christen when she gets to Christen’s clothes in her drawer. 

But it’s Kelley’s face that pops up on screen.

“Bonito!!!” Kelley beams. 

_ Hi! _

“Press is just getting food because we’re having dinner. But that’s not important. What’s important is that I’ll see you in Portland in less than two weeks!!” Tobin’s eyes and mouth go wide in excitement but Kelley suddenly turns to her left and says, “It’s Tobin.”

Alex pops up beside Kelley, “I forgot about that. Don’t worry about game day tickets, Tobs. We’ll hook you up.”

“And don’t worry about what to wear,” Kelley grins. “I’m bringing you my jersey.”

“Oh, hell no!” Alex exclaims. “She’s not wearing Sky Blue in Providence Park, Worms.”

“You’re just jealous I’m her favorite.”

“No, you’re not.”

“Oh, yes, I am, Janice. I helped surprise Press in Harrison. What have you done—” The screen blurs for a second and then it comes back into focus with Christen’s beautiful smiling face.

“Hi, babe!”

_ Hi, my love! _

“Hold on. Let me just fix…” Christen seems to be placing the phone on the dining table, adjusting it, before she turns to her left and says, “Stop it, you two.”

_ Worms and Janice? _Tobin asks.

_ Yes, _Christen laughs.

JJ suddenly appears to Christen’s right, with a big smile and an enthusiastic wave.

And Tobin smiles and waves back before JJ disappears again and Christen asks, _ What’s up? _

_ I’m sorry, I didn’t realize it was time for team dinner. _

_ Don’t worry about it. _

_ I didn’t know what to do with your clothes. _

_ Oh, honey, you can do whatever. Prioritize your things first. If you end up with enough space and you want to bring them, you can. Otherwise, please just bring them to my parents’ house. _

_ Okay. _

*

The next five days go by in a blur.

One moment, Tobin is loading so many packages that it feels like Christmas all over again, the next moment, she’s eating farewell tacos with her cohort in their favorite taco joint near LAX.

They laugh while reminiscing about their training days and first boo-boo’s on the job and sigh… at how some things have changed and how some things have stayed the same… 

*

_ How was your last week of deliveries? _Lauren signs after plopping down on the dining chair across Tobin.

_ Tiring, _ Tobin answers. _ I haven’t FaceTimed with Chris since Monday and I missed her second match against France on Thursday. But the drivers’ night last night was pretty cool. _

_ I’m glad you had fun. _

They’re eating cereal for breakfast at their dining table before heading to church that Sunday, the day before Tobin flies to Portland.

_ So what do you want to do today? _ Lauren asks. _ Want to hit all our favorite spots after mass? _

_ Yes, please. Then, maybe we can go inside Griffith Observatory after sunset? _

_ And line up to look through the telescopes? _

_ Sure. _

_ Finally! _Lauren cheers.

And they both laugh.

*

_ I have a feeling the next time we’ll see each other, it’ll be on my wedding day, _Lauren muses as they wait for their coffee order the next day after Tobin checks in for her late morning flight (in a different terminal).

_ Don’t say that, _ Tobin frowns a bit. _ But I better be invited. _

_ You will be, so you better show up. _

They smile warmly at each other.

_ I’m gonna miss you, buddy, _Lauren smiles.

_ I’m gonna miss you, too, _ Tobin smiles back. _ Thank you for everything— _

_ Stop it. I don’t wanna cry. _

They both chuckle before moving in for a really long, really tight, really warm, and heartfelt hug… 

*

Tobin stares at the view from her window seat, amazed, as the plane slowly makes its descent for landing. 

(She didn’t know there’d be this much green in and around Portland.)

She sees lush forests… a wide, calm river… a beautiful harbor… a snow-capped mountain in the distance… 

And she’s smiling so wide that by the time the plane starts taxiing towards the gate, she can’t deny it. She’s in love.

*

She feels light and airy after deplaning, walking across the teal carpet, looking super cool with her snapback on, clutching her backpack straps, and heading down to baggage claim at the lower level.

She laughs to herself as she keeps an eye on the carousel, counting one nondescript luggage after another, thankful for Christen’s tip to tie an orange ribbon—She quickly takes her phone out to send a message to Christen. 

But someone grabs her arm with two hands and shakes her, making her turn to her left, and she sees Alex beaming at her, with arms wide open, asking for a hug, which she immediately gives. Then she notices a tall blonde walking towards them, eyeing her up and down with a resting bitch face, and she can’t help but smile sheepishly, knowing that the blonde is her other roommate and Alex’s teammate with the Portland Thorns.

Alex turns to where she’s looking, then back to her, still beaming, with one hand pointing in the blonde’s direction. “Tobs, this is Ali. Al, this is Tobin.” There must be confusion written on Tobin’s face because Alex adds with a chuckle, “I know… It’s confusing… We’re all named Alexandra… But Krieger’s nickname is spelled A-l-i… while hers is spelled A-l-l-i-e… Actually, Krieger used to be called Alex until I came along—oh, never mind!”

Tobin’s mouth forms into a comical O. Then she remembers to extend a hand towards Allie for a handshake, with a more confident smile on her face, and Allie grasps her hand firmly, poker face still on, then says, “I see it now… No wonder Press is pulling out all the stops for you.”

Tobin blushes.

“But you don’t look like a Tobin,” Allie continues after letting her hand go. “You look more like a… Harry.”

Tobin frowns, then quickly types on her app to reply, “No, you… look like… a Harry.”

Allie finally drops her poker face and smirks, “I think we’ll get along just fine… Harry.”  
*  
They ride the elevator up the second floor after getting Tobin’s luggage, with Alex taking Tobin’s backpack and Allie and Tobin rolling one suitcase each.

They exit through a revolving door, onto a footbridge connecting the terminal to another building, which Tobin assumes is for parking. And they’re not even halfway through the bridge when Alex stops them (with a hand on Tobin’s shoulder) and says, “Wait, wait, wait… Let’s take a selfie with the sign.”

Tobin looks around to check what sign Alex is talking about and spots ‘Portland International Airport’ above the revolving door just when she feels another tap on her shoulder. When she turns, Alex is handing her a black snapback, with a big, bold, white-lettered ‘PDX’ felt applique on the front.

“Our welcome gift,” Allie smiles.

And Tobin beams, signing, _ Thank you, thank you, _to both women before removing her Supreme hat and replacing it with the new one.

Then Alex takes the groupie, with all of them beaming.  
*  
Tobin is putting her seatbelt on in the backseat, behind Alex at the wheel, when she feels her phone vibrating with an Instagram notification. 

Alex has posted their photo.

Liked by **christenpress** and 21 others  
**alexmorgan13** Roomies complete. Welcome to PDX @tobinheath!!

Tobin closes Instagram just as quickly as she opens it and goes to Messages, where Christen’s texts have been waiting.

[Christen]  
_ Yes babe  
_ _ *  
_ _ Sweetheart?  
_ _ *  
_ _ You okay?  
_ _ *  
_ _ Ugh you look soooo good _

[Tobin]  
_ Babe!!!  
_ _ We just got into Alex’s car  
_ _ Portland looked gorgeous from   
_ _ the plane I couldn’t believe it  
_ _ I can’t wait to see you here next   
_ _ week!!! _

[Christen]  
_ I can’t wait to see you either  
_ _ I’m so glad you like it there so far  
_ _ I miss you I miss you _

[Tobin]  
_ I miss youuuuuuuu  
_ _ Kiss you in 9 days, my love!!!  
_ *  
Tobin receives more Instagram notifications in the next couple of minutes.

woofl: @alexmorgan13 @allie_long_ @tobinheath   
the level of hotness in this pic is off the charts  
iam_kml: @tobinheath looks so *fire* @soledaddl  
DODO24: @tuba-holy-spirit @deleteduser *pervy eyes*   
tuba-holy-spirit: whOA! Holy shit!!!! Their new   
roommate is GORGEOUS!!! *hearteyes*   
*hearteyes* *fire* *rainbow heart* *heart*  
deleteduser: OMG! Who is that beautiful human?! 

She starts feeling overwhelmed. But then she remembers that Alex is famous, which is probably the reason for her mentions. So out of curiosity, she clicks on Alex’s profile and—Oh. My. Word. Alex has 2.5 million followers. 

Tobin closes the app, thinking she’d rather not open it again.

[Tobin]  
_ Babe I turned off notifications   
_ _ for Instagram okay _

[Christen]  
_ I’m so sorry I should’ve warned   
_ _ you that you’re bound to get   
_ _ noticed if Alex posts a photo   
_ _ with you in it  
_ _ You’re just so hot, babe _

Tobin smiles to herself.

[Tobin]  
_ How hot? _

[Christen]  
_ Why don’t you ask me again   
_ _ later when you’re alone in your   
_ _ room, in your fancy new   
_ _ apartment?  
_ *  
Fancy is right, all right, Tobin thinks, as Alex pulls up into the driveway of a contemporary, three-storey townhouse complex. 

Tobin can’t stop gaping from the time Alex pushes a button to open their garage door, to when they show her her room with its own small bathroom on the first floor, then the barbecue and fire pit area out front, then the kitchen, dining and living areas, plus a balcony, on the second floor, and then their rooms and bathrooms on the third floor.

“So, whaddaya think?” Alex asks Tobin, with a smile. “Way nicer in person than in photos, right?”

Tobin nods enthusiastically, with a big grin, then types on her app to say, “Thanks again… for taking… me in.”

“We’re happy to have you,” Alex replies. “Please make yourself at home. But, like, literally.”

They all laugh a little before Tobin nods again.

“Okay, so… Allie and I still have a recovery session this afternoon,” Alex tells her. “Feel free to get snacks from the pantry… or the fridge if you get hungry… But if you feel like grocery shopping... Whole Foods is less than a 10-minute walk from here… and there’s a nearby CVS there, too.”

Tobin gives her a thumbs up.

“Then, how about we go out for dinner tonight… to celebrate your first night?”

“Sounds… good… to me.”

“What do you like to eat?” 

“We know what she likes to eat,” Allie deadpans.

And it takes a second after Tobin snorts—with her face turning red—for Alex to get it.

“Oh, my God. Al!”

Tobin can only shake her head and smile in embarrassment as she makes her app say, “I love… food.”

“That’s what I thought,” Allie says, before turning to Alex. “Harry loves eating out.”

“Al!”

And Tobin laughs.  
*  
After Tobin unpacks and fixes her room… after Alex and Allie leave for the stadium… after a quick trip to Whole Foods and CVS… and after an even quicker shower, Tobin settles back in her newly made bed, with her laptop beside her, and texts Christen.

[Tobin]  
_ Babe _

[Christen]  
_ Yes babe _

[Tobin]  
_ Allie said she knows what I   
_ _ like to eat _

[Christen]  
_ Oh gosh, I snorted _

[Tobin]  
_ :D :D :D  
_ _ Babe _

[Christen]  
_ Yes babe _

[Tobin]  
_ How hot am I? _

[Christen]  
_ Open your laptop and I just   
_ _ might show you exactly how   
_ _ hot I think you are _

*

Orgasmic is probably the best word to describe this chicken wing Tobin is currently chewing a mouthful of. And it shows on her face.

“The best, isn’t it, Harry?” Allie smirks.

Tobin nods slowly, with her eyes closed and her face scrunched up, as if she had been famished and is eating for the first time.

They bring her to Pok Pok, one of the quintessential Portland institutions, with a waiting line so long that Alex had to drop Allie off at the restaurant to queue up for a table, before picking Tobin up from their apartment, and they still had to wait 25 more minutes to get seated. 

But the look on Tobin’s face as she eats the restaurant’s signature chicken wings and tries all the other dishes they ordered makes the wait oh, so worth it and becomes a great source of amusement for Allie and Alex, who are sitting side by side, facing her.

“Your face is the best,” Alex laughs.

Tobin gives Alex a big smile, with the corner of her eyes crinkling, as she continues to chew.

“I’m still blown away that you can lip read,” Allie comments just when Tobin is about to take a bite, holding another chicken wing with both hands. “Is it hard?”

Tobin shrugs.

“Yeah, I was wondering about that, too,” Alex says. “Is that, like… a talent or a skill?”

Tobin pauses to think. Then she points at both women, mimes kicking as carefully as she can in the tight space, then draws a circle with both hands.

“Us… kicking… a ball?” Alex guesses.

Tobin nods.

“You’re comparing it to us playing soccer?” Allie chimes in.

And Tobin nods again.

“Huh, makes sense,” Alex says. “There’s talent but… you need to practice to be better.”

Tobin points at Alex as if to say, _ Exactly! _

Then Allie asks, “So how did you learn?” 

Tobin points to herself—

“You…” 

—then raises her index finger—

“One…”

—then shakes her head—

“No…”

—then points to her ear—

“Ear…”

—then links her index fingers and her thumbs in front of her to draw another circle (but horizontally, not vertically like she did with ‘ball’).

“You’re one—the only one,” Allie starts, “who can’t hear… in your family?”

Tobin points at Allie as if to say, _ You are correct! _

“So your family taught you how to lip read?” Alex asks.

Tobin nods again and smiles.

“Oh, my God, this is amazing,” Allie beams. “It’s like permanent charades.”

And Tobin laughs, looking so happy (and amused at Allie not having a filter), like she can’t think of a better way to end her first day in Portland.

“Al, can we get Harry in our team? I wanna crush the other girlies at charades.”

*

Tobin smiles when she wakes up the next morning at 5:04am. 

Then she promptly goes back to sleep.  
*  
She wakes up again and finally gets up at 8:20am after texting Christen good morning.

[Tobin]  
_ Are you already at pregame   
_ _ training, my love? _

Christen doesn’t reply (even after Tobin gets to an empty second floor) so she must be.

Tobin proceeds with brewing coffee for three and making a bowl of cereal before sitting down at the head of the dining table for eight. Then she decides to check her new employer’s website and starts reading the lifestyle section she’ll work in, then the day’s headlines, then sports.

Alex joins her at the table a few minutes later, with a cup of coffee and a bowl of yogurt with granola and berries. 

Not too long after, Allie drops a copy of USA Today and a pen on the table before getting coffee, plus two bananas, and making toast.

They eat wordlessly for a while, with Tobin and Alex on their phones while Allie answers the daily crossword puzzle.

After a while, Allie taps Tobin’s arm. “What’s a four-letter word for love,” she asks, with air quotes, “attachment?”

Tobin cranes her neck as Allie slides the paper over to her. A moment later, Tobin writes, _ lorn, _then grins at Allie.

“Ugh, I want you in my team for all the games, Harry. All the games!”

And they all laugh.  
*  
Alex and Allie leave Tobin to her own devices, after breakfast, for morning training, and tell her they’ll be back after lunch to give her a tour of downtown Portland. And with a lot of time in her hands, Tobin decides to memorize the streets of Portland just for fun, the same way that she memorized the streets of LA when she was still training to be a delivery driver.

*

They ride the MAX train from Providence Park Station to Tobin’s new office first before going on a well-documented tour around downtown in the afternoon.

They take photos of Tobin taking a bite of her bacon maple doughnut (bar), with the all-pink Voodoo Doughnut truck behind her in Pioneer Courthouse Square… 

…photos of Tobin and Allie hamming it up at the parking lot with the ‘Keep Portland Weird’ wall… 

…photos of Tobin looking like a kid at a candy store, with her arms outstretched between rows of books about a block long in Powell’s City of Books, where they stay for almost two hours so that Tobin can check out all five floors of the largest bookstore in the world… 

…and photos of Tobin lining up at a food cart on Alder Street, with a thumbs up and a grin.

Tobin sends them all to Christen.

[Tobin]  
_ I love Portland!!  
_ _ I wish you were here babe!! _

*

_ Just eight more days… I can’t wait to see you, _Christen tells her longingly in their FaceTime call that night.

_ You’ll be here soon, my love, _Tobin smiles kindly.

_ Are you excited for your first day of work tomorrow? _Christen asks.

And Tobin nods vigorously with a huge grin, looking so adorable that Christen instinctively leans in for a kiss.

*

Breakfast is more of the same the next morning, except that it starts earlier and ends with all three roommates leaving for work before 9am.

*

Tobin finally meets her editor, Sylvia, in person and it’s a good thing Tobin dresses up a little, wearing a pale blue, tunic-style shirt with dark blue buttoned placket, black jeans, and Chelsea boots, because everyone in the office is wearing business casual.

Sylvia is an Oregon native, apparently, and a single mom (of a tween daughter), with a curly bob and thick eyeglasses.

They get on well and Tobin doesn’t miss the look of delight, mixed with relief, on Sylvia’s face when she realizes they’ve been talking for a few minutes already with just Tobin’s apps and ability to lip read. (They’ve already discussed getting an interpreter only when necessary over email.)

They cover what Sylvia wants Tobin to do day to day, like checking Facebook groups, Twitter, and Reddit, expectations when she’s on assignment, and deadlines.

Tobin is thrilled that she’ll likely be assigned the cool wellness and fitness topics the other staff members (majority of whom are middle-aged) don’t like. They’ll mostly be fillers and listicles but Tobin doesn’t mind, she’ll get to try new things.

Sylvia introduces her to everyone, going from cubicle to cubicle, before leading her to her cubicle and telling her to shadow her seatmate Liz—which is short for Lizandro—who will teach her how to use their software and add articles to their website. (Then afterwards, Tobin needs to go back to Sylvia to discuss her first assignment as they wait for IT to grant her system access.)

Liz is a mousy gay her age, with a soft, curly crew cut and trendy eyeglasses. They’re two of the three youngest staffers in the newspaper (the third being a guy covering travel and outdoors), so it’s no surprise when Liz starts a new sticky note and types, _ Welcome to the trending news team, the most fun team to be on! _

Tobin grins.

And Liz continues, _ I have to tell you, this is the first place I’ve ever worked where people love coming to work everyday and are genuinely supportive of each other. I hope you’ll feel the same way. _

_ Thank you, _Tobin signs. 

Liz nods and smiles at her like he knows what that sign means.

*

Tobin cries to Christen that night, just gushing about her boss, her fashionable gay seatmate, her other coworkers, her office, her own cubicle! She just can’t get over getting her own cubicle.

(Christen looks like she’s holding herself back from giggling at how cute Tobin is.)

*

No two days are ever the same at work, Tobin learns, just like Liz told her. But she starts the habit of praying first thing in the morning when she gets to the office and at the very end of her work day before going home.

That Friday night, Sylvia chats with her through the office communicator just before she shuts down her computer, telling her she did good in her first three days and to keep it up.

[Tobin]  
_ Thanks, boss! _

[Sylvia]  
_ Are you doing anything fun this weekend? _

[Tobin]  
_ I’ll watch the Thorns match tomorrow. _

[Sylvia]  
_ At Providence Park? _

[Tobin]  
_ Yes. _

[Sylvia]  
_ That’s great. I hope you have fun. _

[Tobin]  
_ Thanks! Do we have a reporter covering the match? _

[Sylvia]  
_ Sometimes one of our Sports Editor, Jamie, is there. Most of the time, she isn’t. _

[Tobin]  
_ Why not? _

[Sylvia]  
_ She usually writes feature articles about them but not regular match results like she does with the Timbers. _

Tobin thinks it’s unfair. But forgets about it as soon as she gets home. Because Kelley is there. And she’s sleeping over.

Let the boisterous fun begin… 

*

The atmosphere at Providence Park that Saturday night is simply… electric. There’s no other word for it, Tobin thinks, as she scans the crowd from the outdoor seating of the suite she’s in. 

She can feel the stadium vibrating and wishes she could be in the thick of it but her three friends are adamant that she shouldn’t be sitting in the stands.

She’s wearing her orange beanie, with her hair down, and a black t-shirt with the Portland Thorns logo, which Al and Al gave her. But when the two teams come out for warm ups (with Kelley’s Sky Blue FC nearer to her than the Thorns) and Kelley looks up to the deck, Tobin walks over to the railing with a grin, turns around, and lifts her shirt off to reveal a Sky Blue jersey underneath, with O’Hara and the number 19.

When Tobin turns around again to face the pitch, Kelley is grinning and giving her two thumbs up.  
*  
Tobin is literally on the edge of her seat when the match starts, like she doesn’t want to miss anything, like something is bound to happen.

Two minutes in and Sky Blue players are throwing their hands up, calling for a handball on Alex, who doesn’t seem fazed and keeps dribbling and running towards the end line, then takes a shot—ugh, saved. But okay, this is exciting. Tobin beams.

Six minutes later, Kelley steals the ball in midfield and accidentally trips Allie, who falls to the ground and watches in horror as Kelley’s pass reaches her Sky Blue teammate, who dribbles the ball a few yards, sees the Thorns keeper off her line, then chips the ball from long range and—goal! 

Tobin stands up abruptly, like she wants to do something—she wants to celebrate with Kelley but feels sorry for Allie—and then, it hits her—she wants to write. About this match, about that goal, about her friends.

She rushes out of the suite to find the concierge… then hurries back to her seat, with a notepad and a pen.  
*  
By the time the match ends—with a saved attempt from Allie, a beautiful shot from Kelley that goes just a bit wide, an equalizer from a quick throw-in, two attempts by the same goal scorer named Sinclair, an acrobatic shot from Alex, a headed goal by Sky Blue, resounding groans from the stands, a mad scramble for another equalizer in the last five minutes starting with a crackling attempt from Alex in the 90th minute that flies over the bar, and a final score of 1-2 to Sky Blue—Tobin is furiously typing on her phone, looking at the notes she had written in shorthand. 

And she’s lost in her own world… 

…even as the concierge leads her to the elevator to go down to the locker room minutes later… 

…as she waits for the girls to come out… 

…as she conducts a shotgun interview with Kelley… and then, with Alex… 

…as she’s forced to smile for a group photo at the parking lot… 

…as they drive to Chipotle for their post-match meal before bringing Kelley to her team hotel and going home… 

…as she stays at their dining table with Allie (who is eating her pint of my-team-just-lost ice cream) and finishes her article… 

[Tobin]  
_ Boss, I sent you my post-match   
_ _ report. Would you please take   
_ _ a look?  
_ *  
[Sylvia]  
_ Ok _

[Tobin]  
_ Thank you  
_ *  
[Sylvia]  
_ I’ve forwarded to Jamie  
_ _ *  
_ _ She says she’ll run it   
_ _ And you should bring your   
_ _ laptop next time you watch :) _

[Tobin]  
_ Thank you!!! :) _

Tobin has the biggest smile on her face when she goes to sleep.

*

_ I just read it! _ Christen signs when Tobin accepts her call the next morning after fixing the phone in a holder attached to the dining table. _ I’m so proud of you, sweetheart! _

Tobin grins as she sits to eat breakfast with Christen before Christen does her pregame morning exercises. _ I love you. _

_ I love you, _ Christen beams. _ Will it be a regular thing—you doing match reports for the Thorns? _

_ I don’t know yet. But I was told to bring my laptop to the next game I’ll watch. _

_ So there’s a chance you’ll write about me? _

Tobin grins even wider as she nods, _ And I can’t wait! _

Christen giggles, _ Three more sleeps and I’ll be there, my love. _

_ Just three more sleeps! _

_ The four of you looked really cute in your beanies last night, by the way. _

_ They sent you the photo? _

_ Alex posted it. _

_ Oh. I’m the cutest though, right? _

Christen giggles again, _ Most of Alex’s fans seem to think so. _

Tobin groans, _ Baby, did you read the comments? _

_ I couldn’t help it! They were tagging you. And talking about you. A lot. They even discovered that half of the national team followed you and— _

Tobin makes a face.

_ —wait. Maybe you should capitalize on this and set up a Twitter account for your articles and put the link on your Instagram profile. _

_ Do I have to? _

_ Baby, you’re part of the team whose main purpose is to get more clicks on your articles. _

_ I’d like to get more licks on my articles. _

Christen tilts her head and glares at Tobin.

_ Not funny? _

_ Not when I can’t do any licking about it. _

Tobin busts out laughing.  
*  
Alex catches the tail end of their conversation and shouts, “Good luck at your game later, Presi!” before getting coffee, scrambling eggs and making toast for breakfast.

Tobin stays at the table after their call because she’s got nothing else to do (having finished her assigned article for the online health magazine yesterday), so she checks other NWSL match reports and the current team standings.

Allie joins them just when Alex places two plates of scrambled eggs with toast on the table. Then they both sit down to eat. (They’ve started the habit of sitting side by side, just as Tobin started sitting across them.)

The two players look a bit worse for wear this morning, clearly feeling bad about missing their chances to turn the game around yesterday.

“I can’t wait to get pampered later after recovery,” Alex sighs.

“Ugh, me, too, girlie,” Allie says before grabbing a toast.

“Wanna come with us, Tobs?”

Allie’s head snaps up before Tobin types on her app to ask, “Where?”

Now there’s a mischievous smirk on Allie’s face. “Ever had a Brazilian wax, Harry?”

Tobin shakes her head.

“Presi never asked you to get one?” Alex asks.

Tobin shakes her head again.

So Allie asks, “She prefers you have hair down there?” 

Tobin blushes, then replies through her app, “We’ve… never… discussed… it.”

“But she regularly gets waxed, right?”

Tobin hesitates.

“Oh, come on, Harry. We know she gets waxed—we all do it—we’re just… confirming it.”

Tobin sighs, then nods.

“So what do you do?”

Tobin blushes even more as she gestures cutting with her fingers.

“You scissor,” Allie deadpans, then rolls her eyes. “Of course, you scissor.”

Tobin buries her face in both hands as Alex bursts into laughter. 

Then Tobin feels two hands squeezing her arms. And when she removes her hands off her face, she sees her roommates smirking and offering their hands for her to hold. 

She reluctantly places her hands in theirs.

“We think you should try it,” Alex says.

“Yes, Harry. Our treat,” Allie adds.

When Tobin makes a face, Alex blurts out, “Yes, it’ll hurt.” 

“But it’ll be quick.”

“And it’ll be worth it.”

“Press will love it. She’ll thank us later.” 

“It’ll be a really nice surprise, Tobs.”

“You’ll be smooth as a baby’s.”

*

Timing is everything. Tobin knows this. Which is why she drives Alex’s car around the airport twice, to be able to pull up behind the vans hired by the Chicago Red Stars, just in time for the team to come out of arrivals, to pick Christen up three evenings later.

She hopes she looks as good as her roommates say she does when she spots Christen in her sweatsuit, walking behind her teammates. She primps her blow-dried hair one last time, sweeps it over to one side, then gets out of the car.

She’s wearing an outfit picked out by Al and Al—Alex’s all-white sneakers, her cuffed black jeans, and her denim vest over her white sleeveless shirt thin enough to give away the fact that she’s wearing a black bra underneath.

She struts on the sidewalk as if it were a catwalk as she beelines for Christen without taking her eyes off her. And Christen’s head turns as if she feels Tobin’s gaze—and thank goodness it’s still light out or Tobin would’ve missed the way Christen’s mouth opens in surprise or the way Christen holds her breath. 

Tobin feels like she’s in a movie, walking in slow motion, being ogled by the object of her affection.

She tries her best not to smirk when she reaches Christen and leans in for a kiss… near the corner of Christen’s lips—lips that trail after hers as she slowly pulls away and meets Christen’s gaze—Christen regains her composure then, biting her lower lip with a ghost of a smile as if she’d just realized what Tobin is trying to do.

Tobin almost forgets to keep her cool. But she readily grabs the handle of Christen’s luggage, turns around, and drags it to the car, flexing her arm needlessly as she goes.

And when she stops near the trunk and turns to check on Christen, she spots JJ grinning and waving at her and she can’t help but grin and wave back. Christen’s other teammates seem to be teasing her as she waves them off and starts walking towards Tobin, who waits until she’s near before opening the trunk and lifting the luggage into it.

Christen just stares and doesn’t move until Tobin opens the passenger door for her with a smirk. But Christen smirks back and walks straight into Tobin, pressing her slightly parted lips against Tobin’s, slotting their lips together long enough for Tobin to get a whiff of her scent and a taste of her lips… and it’s Tobin’s turn to trail after her lips when she pulls away and casually gets in the car.

Tobin stops herself from chuckling as she closes the door, then looks up to the heavens to say thanks before going around the car.

Once she’s inside, Christen is already wearing her seatbelt, leaning back against the door and not her seat, with her thumb and index finger between her lips, elbow resting on the panel, looking at Tobin like she’s… delectable.

_ What’s the occasion? _she asks abruptly.

And Tobin puts on a really charming smile, _ Our first date in Portland. _

_ Oh, really? I don’t remember— _

_ Go on a date with me. _

It takes a beat before Christen replies, _ Only if you let me shower and change into something nicer first. _

_ Anything you want, my love.  
_ *  
Christen throws Tobin out of her room to get ready for their date. And Tobin seems to have anticipated this because when Christen texts her that she’s ready and Tobin goes down to her room from the second floor and knocks on the door and Christen opens it looking as gorgeous as ever, Tobin presents her with a bouquet of roses in one hand and is hiding something behind her back with the other.

Christen raises an eyebrow and Tobin grins before revealing a vase (with water) in her other hand. And Christen laughs as she takes the bouquet and the vase and turns around to bring them to Tobin’s desk.

Tobin rakes her eyes over Christen’s body then, staying by the door, not wanting to step inside or they’ll never leave her room. She hums in appreciation as she takes in the high ponytail, the hoop earrings, the sleeveless gray blouse that’s short enough to reveal a sliver of Christen’s lean stomach, and the ripped blue jeans that make Christen’s ass look downright—Damn.

Their gazes meet.

Then Christen asks, _ Do we have a reservation? _

_ Alex called the restaurant for us. _

_ So we can’t cancel then? _

_ Better not, my love, _ Tobin smiles. _ Besides… I need to feed you first before I wear you out. _ Then she winks and leaves without waiting to see how Christen reacts, snapping her fingers for herself in the hallway and grinning.  
*  
She brings Christen to Irving Street Kitchen for a casual candlelit dinner, where they share a small plate of roasted cauliflowers, a large plate of salmon, and a slice of chocolate cake, with a side of flirty smiles, smoldering looks, and lingering touches—touches that seem to have taken more meaning than they usually have… like a simple handhold with a squeeze, which probably means, ‘I’m so happy that you’re here.’

…a gentle kiss on the knuckle, which almost certainly means, ‘I missed you.’

…a persistent caress on the inner thigh, which unmistakably means, ‘I want you,’ and the reciprocal gesture on the forearm, assuring, ‘You’ll get to have all of me’ and ‘Soon.’  
*  
They pounce on each other as soon as the door to Tobin’s room opens.

And they kiss hungrily and breathlessly and press against each other wantonly. And in the rare times when they part, they manage to sign.

_ I have… a surprise… for you… _

_ I have… a surprise… for you, too… _

_ You… go first… _

_ No, you… go first… _

Christen pulls back like it pains her to do so and backs away further into the room before unzipping her boots and taking them off, then turning around and taking her top off, then glancing at Tobin and taking her pants off.

And Tobin just about dies—at the sight of Christen’s lacy black underwear that barely covers her sumptuous round—but Christen faces her again. And with a hint of a smirk, she tells her, _ Your turn. _

And Tobin hastily slides off her shoes and removes her vest and unhooks her bra before taking it off along with her shirt. And then she takes her pants off, leaving the black low rise bikini underneath, showing off a faint V, leading Christen’s eyes to her smooth and hairless—

“Fuck…”

_ All night if you want, baby. _

*

Their sensual glances carry on throughout dinner the next night.

They’ve ordered Hawaiian food to go from 808 Grinds and brought it home and now, Tobin is happily gobbling up one of the best fried chicken dishes she’s ever tasted.

_ Baby, _ Christen giggles, _ please slow down. _

_ But It’s game day tomorrow, _Tobin tells her as if it makes perfect sense.

_ Okay, yes. It is. What does that have to—? _Christen laughs all of a sudden and shakes her head.

_ I take it you’re still up for debunking the ‘no sex before game day’ myth? _Tobin smirks.

Christen smirks back, _ Well, I have to give you something to write about, haven’t I? _

Tobin grins. And Christen grins back. Then they both notice Allie narrowing her eyes at them across the table.

“Are you talking dirty without us knowing?”

And they both laugh.

*

Christen does give Tobin something to write about the next evening, when she takes a left-footed shot from a tough angle, beating the Thorns goalkeeper and two defenders, in the 76th minute, then scores a golazo in the 82nd minute from outside the box that’s so stunning Tobin feels the crowd groaning—much to her delight—ties the game at 2-2 and ruins what could’ve been a 2-0 birthday win for Alex.  
*  
Tobin is still typing her article on her laptop, sitting cross-legged against the wall outside the locker room, with her backpack next to her, when a freshly showered Christen crouches down beside her.

_ My love! _ Tobin exclaims, not changing her position. _ Your second goal was a thing to behold in person! It was so, so, so spectacular! _

Christen giggles, _ So you’re still writing about it then? _

Tobin nods vigorously, with a smile.  
*  
She’s still not done minutes later, when Christen taps her on the shoulder and she looks up to see Alex standing in front of her.

“C’mon, Tobs… time to party.”

Tobin gives the sorriest, most adorable pout she can give to Christen.

_ How about finishing it in the car? _ Christen suggests. _ I’ll tell Alex you’re still on the clock. _

Tobin nods again and signs, _ Yes, please, _ before folding her laptop, slinging her backpack over her shoulder, and holding Christen’s hand.  
*  
She still hasn’t finished when they park outside the birthday party venue (a gastropub). So Christen tells Al and Al to go ahead and asks for the car key.

_ Sweetheart, you can go enjoy the party, _ Tobin tells her. _ I’ll be fine. I’ll go in soon. _

But Christen tells her, _ I want to stay with you.  
_ *  
When Tobin finally submits her match report for editing and they get out of the car, Tobin brings her backpack with her and Christen gives her a questioning look.

_ In case I… need to make revisions, _ Tobin explains.  
*  
True enough, she does need to make a revision after being introduced to the Thorns and Red Stars players and staff in attendance and moves to an empty table next to theirs to write. Again.  
*  
After a while, she feels Christen’s hand on her shoulder, sets her eyes on a plate of half a sandwich and french fries that Christen lays on the table, then turns to Christen, _ You shared your fries with me?! _

_ Maybe just a quarter portion, _Christen smirks.

_ You love me. _

Christen laughs, _ I do, _ then kisses the top of Tobin’s head while Tobin kisses her hand.  
*  
In the end, Tobin posts her article, goes back to the party table, and enjoys the rest of the night holding Christen’s hand and playing footsie with her under the table.  
*  
Their impatience starts to show when Christen volunteers to take photos and bosses everyone to pose quickly (because Alex wants more pics before wrapping up the party) and Tobin readily poses for a number of ‘roomies’ photos before volunteering to drive them home.  
*  
Christen holds and kisses Tobin fiercely and possessively as soon as they close the door to Tobin’s room.

And while Tobin is enjoying it immensely, she can’t help but ask, _ Honey, what’s wrong? _

Christen crinkles her nose before kissing Tobin again.

_ What is it? _Tobin insists.

Christen sighs in annoyance, _ Some of Alex’s fans think you’re together. _

_ What?! _Tobin laughs.

_ It’s not funny. _

_ But it is! Don’t they know she’s straight? _

_ That’s the thing! They know and yet they wish you were together! _

_ Want me to set them straight? _

_ No. Our private life is private. _

_ Then please stop reading the comments. _

_ But they tag you! _

_ Then remove the alerts. _

Christen pouts.

_ Baby. _ Tobin tells her sternly. _ Remove the alerts. _

_ Fine. _

_ Now take my clothes off. _

Christen tries her best not to smirk, _ When did you get so bossy? _

_ I got it on sale at Target last week. _

Christen laughs.

And Tobin smiles at her, still head over heels, _ I love you. _

_ I love you. _

And just like that, their kisses and touches turn slow and gentle, knowing that they have all night to share them before Christen flies back to Chicago.

And they hold each other really tight, feeling like it might be a little while before they can do so again… 

*

A little while turns out to be a little over seven weeks.

As much as they want to visit each other again, their schedules don’t allow it.

Christen’s days are filled with appearances for charity and interviews and the like. And she uses her only real break to fly out to Vegas for Tyler’s bachelorette party.

Tobin wishes she could join Christen there but she has officially been assigned to cover all the Portland Thorns matches, six of which fall on six straight Sundays, with two away games—one in Seattle, which Tobin drives to (much to Pinoe and Sydney’s delight), and one in Boston, which Tobin watches at home and unfortunately coincides with a Red Stars match in DC.

_ Gosh, it’s like I’m in a relationship with someone from the opposing team, _Christen jokes one day.

Tobin practically works every day of the week, with her only free time being Saturday morning or afternoon (depending on when she writes her online health magazine article) and Sunday morning until early afternoon (before the game).

Al and Al do their best to spend their Saturdays with her when they’re in town and drive her to Mt. Hood and Trillium Lake, the Columbia River Gorge and Multnomah Falls, the farmers market at Portland State University and other interesting spots in the city, including—much to Tobin’s mortification—the best sex shop in Portland.

“Didn’t you say you were thinking of getting a toy?” Alex points out, with a smile she’s trying to hide. “Let’s just take a look… see what your options are.”

“I vote checking out strap-ons and teaching Harry about sizes,” Allie smirks—but minutes later, she’s suddenly in awe. “Shut. The. Front. Door. There are strapless strap-ons?!”

They all learn something new that day.

Tobin surprises the two when they get home and she asks through her app, “Could you… help me… with my… workout… routine?”

“Of course, Tobs!”

“What do you want to gain, Harry?”

“Stamina.”

And they all squeal and jump and laugh in excitement.

*

Despite her (virtually) full days, Tobin finds the time to meet with a friend of a friend of a friend, named Casey, who brings her husband Zach and invites their other deaf friends, for dinner on a Friday night at the end of July.

And it’s been a revelation.

Tobin has been ensconced (exclusively) in the hearing world for so long (for three years!) that she has almost forgotten the joys of Deaf culture.

Like their extreme love for details—

Immediately after introducing themselves, Casey launches into the story of their baby and their baby’s nanny and spilt milk and a ruined shirt, which goes on and on for a couple of minutes, before telling Tobin how sorry they are for being late.

—and their bluntness—

The first thing that one of their friends sign when they arrive is, _ Oh, my goodness, Zach, what happened to your hair? It looks like a greasy mop! _

—and their inordinate curiosity about other people’s lives—

They ask question after question about why Tobin moved to Portland, what her current job is, what her previous job was, where she’s from, what was it like living in LA, and _ ‘Ooh, what’s your girlfriend’s name?’ _ and _ ‘What does she do?’ _ and _ ‘She’s a hearie?’ _

They learn enough about Tobin and Christen that they’ll probably give Christen a hug when they meet her.

—and, lastly, their five-stage goodbye.

When Deaf friends get together, they stay at the venue forever. Or at least until the manager of the establishment tells them they’re closing in five minutes, which means that they'll keep talking for another 10 minutes.

And when they remember that the venue is closing, they simply stand up and move further away from the table but continue talking for a couple more minutes… until the staff turns off the lights.

Then they move to the door and still talk until they all get shooed away.

So they continue outside and make plans to meet again.

And then, they finally say goodbye.

It’s past 1am when Tobin gets home.

And when she goes to the second floor to get water to drink, she’s surprised to see Allie at the dining table, looking intently at her laptop. 

She types on her app. “Harry?”

Allie turns to her and smiles, “Oh, hey, Harry.”

Tobin moves closer and types again. “Why are… you still… up?”

“I’m watching my clips from our recent game.”

“What… for?”

“I like to analyze what I liked and didn’t like about my game so I can be better.” Allie sighs. “I really want to make the national team… There are only a few games left in the season… and I want to show the new coach what I got.”

“You know… I only… ever hoped… to do… what I… really like… to do… but never… expected… to be… given… the chance… yet here… I am… If I… can make it… you can… make it.”

*

Tobin gets an email from a Chicago newspaper out of the blue in early August. And to say that it’s a major bummer is an understatement.

_ It was just another rejection letter, _ she tells Christen sullenly that night, _ a belated one at that. _

_ I’m sorry, sweetheart. _

Tobin lets out a heavy sigh_ , I’m tired of these rejections and nonresponses, my love. I don’t want to submit new applications anymore. Not when I’m starting to hit my stride. I’d rather stay here and do well. _

Christen’s shoulders slump almost inconspicuously as she signs, _ Okay. _

*

Christen’s season with the Red Stars ends with a disappointing fifth place finish in mid-August. And as expected, she immediately goes home to LA and plans on spending her long break equally between LA and Portland before the start of the national team camp in early September.

She flies into Portland on the Tuesday after the Thorns’ semifinal loss to Kansas City over the weekend and meets Alex at the airport (before Alex flies out of Portland), to borrow Alex’s car and drive herself to the apartment because Tobin is at work.

It’s 1pm and Tobin thinks Christen should be there by now but hasn’t heard from her yet.

Her text comes in three hours later.

[Christen]  
_ Babe, what time will you be   
_ _ home? _

[Tobin]  
_ Babe!!  
_ _ Been looking out for your text  
_ _ You got in just fine?  
_ _ I think I’ll be home between   
_ _ 7-7:30 _

[Christen]  
_ I did *heart kiss emoji*  
_ _ Okay I’ll have dinner ready by   
_ _ then  
_ _ See you soon, babe! _

[Tobin]  
_ Kiss you soon, babe! _

Tobin is supposed to be done with work by 6:30pm but she isn’t. 

She rushes out of the office a few minutes past 7pm, gets home just in time at 7:29pm, and goes straight to the second floor where she finds Christen on the couch (with the TV on) just as Christen turns towards her.

_ Honey! I’m home! _Tobin grins and braces for impact as Christen runs towards her and jumps in her arms.

And they kiss, eagerly and fervidly, and shuffle to the dining table carelessly. But just when Christen’s butt hits the table, she pushes Tobin away. _ We are not having sex on this table. _

_ What? Why not? You mean you aren’t dinner? _

Christen laughs, then kisses Tobin again before telling her, _ It’s my turn to feed you first before wearing you out, my love. _

_ Oh, yeah? _

_ Yeah, _ Christen smirks, _ so you better eat. _

_ Food. I presume? _

_ Food I prepared. You’ll need the energy to eat what you really want to eat later, _Christen winks (or tries to) before moving swiftly to the kitchen.

And Tobin laughs before helping her set the table.

They catch up on things they may have missed in the past nine days when Christen was in LA—how Tyler’s wedding preps are going, how happy Christen is that she’ll be able to attend the wedding with three days to spare after the second friendly against Mexico on September 16th, and how happy they both are about Allie getting her first call up.

When dinner is done, Tobin loads the dishwasher quickly, before they hurry down to Tobin’s room.

Then they catch up on the one thing they most definitely missed—pleasuring each other, against the door, in the shower, on the bed, deep into the night… 

*

Tobin wakes up with a start the next day and bolts right up when she sees the time—it’s 8:04am and she’s running late.

She kisses Christen a few times but Christen doesn’t stir. So she hastens to the shower and then upstairs to drink coffee and eat cereal very, very quickly.

She’s rinsing her bowl when her phone vibrates.

[Christen]  
_ Have you left for work? _

She turns off the tap and runs back to her room. And Christen is still naked in bed when she gets inside.

They smile when their eyes meet.

_ I thought you’ve left, _Christen confesses.

_ I tried waking you up with kisses, my love, _ Tobin tells her as she sits on the bed, _ but you were sound asleep. _ Tobin leans down for a kiss, then smiles. _ Good morning. _

Christen smiles back, _ Good morning, _then pulls Tobin down for another kiss that goes on and on and on and on.

Tobin groans_ —I’m so sorry I gotta go— _ then kisses Christen again _ —I have a 10am appointment— _ and again _ —I’m already late— _and again.

_ Stop kissing me, then. _

_ I’m trying. _

Christen giggles as they share another kiss. _ Okay, go. _

_ Okay, okay. _ Tobin steals another kiss. _ See you later, baby. _

_ Kiss you later, sweetheart. _

[Christen]  
_ Will you be home around the   
_ _ same time? _

[Tobin]  
_ I’ll try coming home earlier,   
_ _ babe _

[Christen]  
_ Okay *heart kiss emojis* _

But Tobin leaves the office later than she did yesterday.

[Tobin]  
_ I’m so sorry   
_ _ I just got on the train  
_ _ Be home in 10 mins _

[Christen]  
_ Get home safe, love _

Tobin steps on to the second floor looking weary but forces a grin when Christen calmly gets up from the couch and meets her halfway.

_ Honey, I’m home. _

Christen gives her a soft smile… then a smooch… and then a hug so comforting and warm and tender that Tobin can’t help but sigh… 

Christen waits for Tobin to pull away and when Tobin does, Christen asks, _ Tiring day? _

Tobin nods, _ Remember my 10am appointment? _

Christen nods.

_ I had to go there a second time at 4pm. _

“I’m sorry, babe.” Christen holds Tobin’s hands and gives them a squeeze. “Come on, let’s eat. I’m sure you’re hungry.”

They talk more about each other’s day while eating. And when they’re done, Christen stops Tobin from clearing the table. _ I can do that, sweetheart. _

_ No, I’ll do it. _

_ It’s okay. You can just sit there and relax a bit. _

_ So that I can conserve my energy for something else? _

Christen laughs, _ We can do whatever afterwards. _

_ If by whatever, you mean— _

_ Stop it. _

Tobin laughs.

Then Christen requests, _ Can you please unload the dishwasher tomorrow, though? I had a hard time figuring out where everything went earlier. _

_ I’ll do that, _ Tobin nods. _ I better wake up early. _

_ Want me to set my alarm? _

_ You okay waking up early? _

Christen nods yes, _ I’m thinking of going for a run tomorrow. _

_ Okay, if you’re sure… _

_ What time? _

_ 7:30? _

_ Okay. _

*

They sleep through Christen’s alarm. 

Because orgasms. Plural. Consecutive. In various positions. (They just couldn’t help it last night. Just like the night before.)

Christen wakes up first, shakes Tobin awake, then pushes her to the bathroom.

And when Tobin gets to the second floor, all showered and dressed for work, coffee has already been brewed, her bowl has already been filled with cereal, and Christen is slicing fruit for her oatmeal.

She gives Christen a kiss on the cheek before pouring a cup of coffee, getting milk from the fridge, and eating in a hurry.

And when she places her bowl and her cup on the sink and is about to open the dishwasher, Christen stops her. _ Leave it. _

Tobin looks sorry.

_ I’ll take care of it. Please just try to come home earlier? _Christen asks.

And Tobin nods, before kissing her goodbye.

[Christen]  
_ Wanna meet me for lunch at   
_ _ the food cart pod you always   
_ _ go to? _

[Tobin]  
_ I’m on my way to the other side   
_ _ of the city on assignment, my   
_ _ love :( :( :( _

[Christen]  
_ :( _

[Tobin]  
_ I’m sorryyyy   
_ _ Want me to bring food home   
_ _ for dinner? _

[Christen]  
_ We can’t eat there? _

[Tobin]  
_ They don’t have tables _

[Christen]  
_ Oh okay never mind  
_ _ I’ll just cook _

[Tobin]  
_ Okay *heart kiss emoji* _

Tobin can’t stop looking at the time from 5pm onwards. And she sighs every time she does.

[Sylvia]  
_ I can hear you sighing all the way from here. _

[Tobin]  
_ Sorry, boss. I just really want to go home early today. _

She sighs in relief when she’s done typing at 6:30pm.

Unfortunately for her, Sylvia has other things to do before getting to her article. And she can’t help but grimace, looking like she’s one short breath away from a tantrum.

[Sylvia]  
_ Go home  
_ _ I’ll text you when I’m done and it’s time to post _

[Tobin]  
_ Really??  
_ _ Thank you, boss!!  
_ _ Thank you, thank you!!! _

She gets home by 7:15pm and feels relieved to see Christen’s face lighting up when their gazes meet.

_ Honey, I made it! _

Christen giggles as she gets off the couch and strides across the floor to get to Tobin, _ Thank you, baby. _

They wrap their arms around each other as they kiss… and kiss… and kiss… and kiss… 

“Is this one of your favorite dress shirts?” Christen asks when they stop to catch their breaths and she plays with Tobin’s collar.

Tobin looks at her knowingly, _ Do you want to rip it open? _

“Maybe.” Christen smirks, before kissing Tobin again. _ It’s all I could think about since you got dressed this morning. _

_ What’s stopping you? _

_ You’re not the least bit worried I’m going to ruin your shirt? _

_ I can sew the buttons back on. _

Christen laughs and they kiss again before she asks, _ Can I do it now? _

_ Can you wait a bit longer? _

Christen gives her a quizzical look, _ You’re not done with work? _

Tobin nods sheepishly, _ I just got out early. But I might need to rewrite and I definitely need to post. _

“Oh.” 

_ I’m sorry. _

_ We better eat dinner then. _

_ Okay. _

Sylvia’s text comes in towards the end of dinner. And Tobin hurriedly finishes her meal and then her article, leaving Christen to clear the table, rinse the dishes, load the washer, and watch a random show on Netflix.

But she does get to rip Tobin’s shirt open in the end, with both of them laughing as buttons fly everywhere.

*

By some miracle, they wake up early the next morning.

And Christen joins Tobin in the shower. 

And they keep smiling stupidly at each other when they get to the second floor, likely recalling how much fun they had the night before (and in the shower).

Tobin (finally) unloads the dishwasher while Christen makes coffee and prepares their food.

Then, once breakfast is done, in a wonderful surprise move, Tobin lifts Christen on the dining table, pulls her shorts and underwear down, and eats her out until she comes… 

And then Tobin goes to work.

[Christen]  
_ I feel so sore _

[Tobin]  
_ I’m sorry _

[Christen]  
_ Not your fault   
_ _ I wish it were lol  
_ _ That would’ve been way more   
_ _ enjoyable  
_ _ But no, I trained twice today _

[Tobin]  
_ Ohh okay *heart kiss emoji*  
_ _ Do you need me to buy   
_ _ anything before going home? _

[Christen]  
_ Dinner?  
_ _ I don’t feel like cooking _

[Tobin]  
_ Okay babe  
_ _ Anything in particular you’re in   
_ _ the mood for? _

[Christen]  
_ You _

[Tobin]  
_ *grinning face with smiling eyes emoji* _

[Christen]  
_ But I’ll be happy with any of   
_ _ your favorite food for dinner :P _

[Tobin]  
_ Offal it is _

[Christen]  
_ Tobin!!! _

[Tobin]  
_ :D :D :D _

Tobin is happy to be out of the office by 6:30pm. 

But luck, it seems, isn’t on her side tonight.

First, the noodles are sold out at her first choice food cart, just when there are only two people ahead of her and she has been in line for almost 20 minutes. So she transfers to another popular food cart a block away to fall in line again for some great Colombian street food.

And then, her phone dies, just when she’s about to update Christen on her whereabouts.

Even worse, the MAX stalls, just when it’s one distant stop away from Providence Park Station. 

It’s past 8pm when she gets home.

And Christen ignores her immediate apology, likely seething inside at her lateness, curtly taking the bag from her and opening all the boxes on the table.

Tobin points at one and tells her, _ That’s one of their bestsellers. _

Christen sighs, takes a seat, slides the box over, and starts eating.

_ I’m so sorry, my love. I waited in line for 20 minutes at the noodle cart with the best beef broth, which, I thought, would make you feel better. But then they ran out just when I was really close to the front of the line and— _

Christen stops Tobin’s rambling with a look. Then she takes another bite.

_ I’m really sorry. _

_ I’m really hungry. _

_ I know. And really angry. _

_ Tobin, my body is aching. I haven’t eaten dinner at the right time in four days. The least you could’ve done was send a text message. _

_ But my phone died! _

_ Seriously?! _

_ I got really unlucky! My phone died when I was walking to the food cart where I bought this. And then the train I was on stopped for several minutes and I had no idea why. I kept signing, ‘I’m deaf, I’m deaf,’ in case someone knew how to sign and tell me what was going on. But no one did. A few people just looked at me like I was having a seizure. _

Christen softens a little bit.

_ Please don’t be mad anymore. I’m really, really sorry. It was out of my hands. _

_ Out of your hands? You could’ve bought food from a cart where you didn’t need to wait in line for 20 minutes in the first place. _

_ You’re right. I could’ve. I’m sorry. I really thought the broth would be worth it. _

_ It wasn’t. _

_ I realize that now. I’m so sorry. Please let me make it up to you. _

Conflicting emotions flit across Christen’s face. But she doesn’t sign anything and just heaves another sigh, before taking it out on her chicken arepa. Her poor, innocent chicken arepa. 

Tobin leaves her be and starts eating an empanada, while constantly glancing her way—she seems to be in deep thought as she chews. 

Then Tobin grabs the other empanada, leaving the pieces of fried yuca in the box, and waits… until Christen steals a glance and Tobin takes it as a sign and slides the box of fried yuca over to her. They’re not french fries but they look like them and Tobin really hopes they’ll do.

Christen turns her head away and rolls her eyes like she’s super annoyed—maybe at Tobin being cute, maybe at herself for almost breaking into a smile. She grudgingly takes a piece of yuca, takes her time to chew, then slides the box halfway between them.

Tobin takes one piece—just one—because it feels like the right thing to do and leaves the rest for Christen.

And once Christen eats the last piece, Tobin offers her hand… and sighs in relief when Christen takes it. Then she kisses her way back into Christen’s good graces, from Christen’s hand… to Christen’s lips… 

*

Christen is in a much better mood over the weekend as Tobin tries really hard to make amends.

On Saturday, Tobin takes Christen on a scenic drive along the Vineyard and Valley Scenic Tour Route, stopping at a local cafe for brunch first, then crossing the road for berry picking, then continuing on with Christen belting out song after song on her playlist and Tobin bopping her head along as she drives.

On Sunday, they go on a hike around Multnomah Falls in the morning. Then they hang out at Powell’s late in the afternoon. Christen, of course, buys books, which Tobin carries around in a basket that gets so heavy she has to hold it in both arms against her chest, which makes Christen pause, then giggle and kiss Tobin on the cheek.

Tobin gives her a questioning look.

_ Remember the first time you delivered a heavy box for me? _Christen asks.

Tobin’s face lights up when she spells out, _ Books? _

Christen nods and smirks, _ It had to be heavy so you would carry it inside for me. _

Tobin fake-gasps, _ Christen Press! _

Christen laughs as she turns into the next aisle.

*

They’re the picture of domestic bliss the next morning, waking up all smiles and lovey-dovey, exchanging kisses in the shower, dividing tasks before leisurely eating breakfast, enjoying a quickie against the kitchen counter… 

Tobin unknowingly smiles on the train on her way to work, likely remembering one of those moments as lovers are wont to do.

But then, she arrives at the office to a hectic scene and it’s all downhill from there.

It’s an ‘all hands on deck’ kind of day, with everyone helping the breaking news team, searching for relevant content in the past few years.

Tobin receives so many requests for specific things, through their office communicator, that she belatedly notices Christen’s text.

[Christen]  
_ Babe, where can I find the   
_ _ phone number for the   
_ _ plumber?  
_ _ We have a dripping faucet :(  
_ _ *  
_ _ Never mind  
_ _ Alex told me where to look  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ I’m so sorry babe  
_ _ I’m swamped with work right   
_ _ now _

[Christen]  
_ Have you eaten?  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ Oh shoot! Thanks for   
_ _ reminding me _

[Christen]  
_ Please eat something, my love   
_ _ *heart kiss emoji* *hug emoji*  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ I’m so sorry I won’t make it in   
_ _ time for dinner  
_ _ Or even late dinner :(  
_ _ Please eat without me _

[Christen]  
_ Okay   
_ _ *  
_ _ There’s food left in case you   
_ _ also forget to eat dinner  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ Thank you!!!!  
_ _ I just might go that route so   
_ _ I can go home earlier _

It’s 9:34pm when Tobin gets home.

And Christen comes up to her and greets her with a kiss and a sad smile. _ This is earlier? _

Tobin nods, looking at Christen with bleary eyes.

_ So you haven’t eaten dinner yet? _

Tobin nods again. And Christen sighs and leads her to the table and asks her to sit, before getting food from the kitchen.

Christen brings back a plate, with fish and salad, and the moment she lays it on the table, Tobin wraps both arms around her waist and holds her tight, face buried in her chest.

And they both sigh.

Tobin feels Christen kissing the top of her head before pulling away.

And when Christen sits, Tobin can’t help but check, _ You’re not mad? _

Christen sighs again, _ I’m… not sure… _

Tobin nods again and starts eating.

_ Is this— _ Christen starts to ask, but hesitates _ —how it usually is, at work? _

Tobin shakes her head, _ No. No two days are ever the same… On a quiet day, I’m just working on a listicle that won’t be due until the end of the week. Most days, I’m working on an assigned topic, plus the listicle… This is a first for me—dropping everything on my plate to help out with two major headlines, which will probably last for a couple of days. _

Christen’s face is unreadable as she nods. _ So, some days are more important than… others? _

_ I guess… kind of, like, how some of your training camps are more important than others. _

Christen simply nods again.

*

The next night, Tobin comes home at 10:05pm to a sleeping Christen on the couch.

And, for a while, she just stands there, worriedly gazing at Christen, internally debating whether to wake her up now or later—she chooses later and goes about getting food, eating dinner, and cleaning as quietly as possible.

She freezes when she finishes loading the dishwasher. The noise will surely wake Christen up. She sighs and closes it, before going down to her room to open the door and turn the lamp on and going up again to turn the dishwasher on and gently wake Christen up.

Christen soon stirs. Then, her eyes flutter open.

And they stare at each other for a moment, before Tobin signs, _ I’m sorry. _

Christen sighs, _ I hope you get home early tomorrow. _

_ What time is your flight again? _Tobin asks.

_ 6am the next morning, _Christen replies.

And Tobin nods. 

Then they stare at each other again.

_ Are you mad at me? _

_ I don’t know. _

*

It’s almost 11pm when Tobin gets home the next night.

Christen is on the couch, awake.

Tobin is exhausted.

And Christen hasn’t made any attempts to move, except to turn her head in Tobin’s direction.

_ Hi, honey. How was your day? _ Tobin asks as she shuffles over to Christen. _ Did you train today? _

_ No, I did recovery today—bought bags of ice and took an ice bath. _

_ That must’ve been— _

_ Painful? _

_ Cold. _

_ It was. _

Tobin leans down to give Christen a kiss.

Christen cups her face with one hand and pulls her down for another. _ Do you need me to plate your food for you? _

_ No, I can do it. _

_ Okay. _

So Tobin gets food… brings her plate over to the table, turns to Christen, who is still on the couch, and asks, _ Will you please sit with me? _

Christen does.

And Tobin starts eating… 

After a while, she signs,_ Big training camp starting soon. Are you excited? _

_ It’ll be grueling, _ Christen sighs. _ I need to fight for my spot in World Cup qualifying. _

_ You can do it. _

_ Thanks. _

Tobin just eats—with neither of them signing anything for a long, awkward spell—until she stops and puts her fork down. _ I don’t understand… _

_ What? _

_ It’s not… the first time I’ve worked long hours… You tell me you don’t know if you’re mad… but it feels like you are. _

Christen takes a deep breath, _ I’m not mad. _

_ Are you just trying to convince yourself that? _

_ I’m not. _

_ Why won’t you just tell me? _

_ I… needed to figure it out. _

_ Have you? _

_ Yes. _

_ And you don’t want to tell me? _

_ I don’t know how to tell you. _

_ You could try signing, ‘I’m mad at you.’ _

_ I’m mad at you. _

_ So you’re mad. _

_ I was following instructions. _

_ Why can’t you just admit it, Chris?! _

_ Because I’m not mad, Tobin! I’m heartbroken! _

Tobin stills, looking absolutely gutted.

And Christen starts shaking, desperately trying to choke back tears, _ And it’s definitely not because of your long work hours—I was so sure back then, when you still delivered, that everytime you could, you thought of me! _

_ And now you think I don’t?! _

_ I feel like an afterthought lately! _

_ How could you say that? Everything I do, I do for you! _

_ Including deciding to stay in Portland indefinitely? _

_ Oh, that’s what this is really about, isn’t it?! _

_ This isn’t just about one thing! There are no texts waiting for me when I get off the plane anymore. No gushing every time I make the bed. No raving about my cooking—I barely get a thank you. I rearrange your room everyday and you don’t even notice. You’re changing! And you don’t even know it. _

Now Tobin is on the verge of tears, _ Whatever happened to telling me what I needed to know, Chris? _

_ Whatever happened to not taking me for granted, Tobin? _

Tobin shakes her head in disbelief._ You have always been at the forefront of everything I do—I came here for you! _

“Oh, this!” Christen scoffs.

_ Because you were right— _ “This is exactly what I was afraid of” _ —coming here was the right decision— _ “that this will come back to haunt me” _ —not just for me, but for us— _ “that you’d tell me this was all for me” _ —I’d have a better job— _ “because of me” _ —We’d have a better future— _ “and I’d have no right to complain” _ —I can make a name for myself— _ “because I pushed you to do it!” _ —and I can make you proud! _

Now they’re both breathing rapidly and heavily—tears refusing to spill over.

_ I want to make you proud, _ Tobin continues. _ I’m becoming my own person, which is what you wanted for me. I feel more confident now than I’ve ever been. Does that mean I’ve changed? I feel like I just found my footing. Aren’t you happy about that? _

_ I’m happy for you, _ Christen answers. _ In fact, I’m proud of you. I want nothing but the best for you and for you to succeed. But not at my expense. I knew there was a chance that I’d lose you to all this, that I’d be cast aside in favor of this new life. It’s been my biggest fear. And it’s happening. _

_ I may have less time for you these days, but it doesn’t mean I love you any less! _

_ Then show me! Because I definitely don’t feel it! _

Christen walks out, leaving Tobin stunned at the table.

And when she gets to her room later, changes out of her work clothes, and lies down on the bed beside Christen, who is facing away from her, Tobin can’t help but rest her hand on Christen’s back, feeling Christen taking a deep breath at her touch… 

*

Tobin awakens with a jolt the next morning.

Christen is no longer in bed and it’s light out.

She quickly checks the time. It’s 6:24am. And there are texts waiting for her.

[Christen]  
_ I tried really hard to wake you   
_ _ up before the cab got here but   
_ _ you were out like a light  
_ _ I’m sorry for leaving you to   
_ _ wake up by yourself   
_ _ I hope we can talk once you’re   
_ _ in LA for the wedding  
_ _ *  
_ _ I love you  
_ _ *  
_ _ Boarding now  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ I love you  
_ _ I’m sorry I didn’t wake up   
_ _ earlier  
_ _ Have a safe flight to SLC  
_ _ Please let me know when   
_ _ you land _

Tobin takes a deep breath before she types again.

[Tobin]  
_ I’m sorry   
_ _ I’m really sorry  
_ _ Please believe me when I say   
_ _ that I don’t love you any less _

She sighs… and opens a different thread.

[Tobin]  
_ Cheney _

She sees the dots soon after.

[Lauren]  
_ Yo _

[Tobin]  
_ Chris sort of said I broke her   
_ _ heart _

[Lauren]  
_ I haven’t even moved and you   
_ _ already screwed up?! _

[Tobin]  
_ What?! When?? Where?? _

[Lauren]  
_ Next week  
_ _ To New Orleans  
_ _ Don’t act so surprised  
_ _ We haven’t talked in 2 months _

[Tobin]  
_ Why didn’t you tell me earlier? _

[Lauren]  
_ Why didn’t you text me earlier?   
_ _ Lol I assumed you were busy  
_ _ Ain’t got time for me _

[Tobin]  
_ Ugh  
_ _ That’s exactly what Chris said   
_ _ last night  
_ _ You’re not mad at me, are you? _

[Lauren]  
_ We’re best friends, not lovers  
_ _ We can get away with these   
_ _ things   
_ _ Where is Chris now? _

[Tobin]  
_ I’m sorry I haven’t checked in  
_ _ She’s on her way to camp _

[Lauren]  
_ Don’t worry about it  
_ _ Two-week camp again?  
_ _ Oh oh   
_ _ For World Cup qualifying in   
_ _ October?? _

[Tobin]  
_ Yes and yes  
_ _ What do I do???? _

[Lauren]  
_ Number one  
_ _ Whatever you do, don’t stop   
_ _ texting her everyday _

[Tobin]  
_ Okay _

They talk until Tobin leaves for work.  
*  
[Christen]  
_ Just landed in Salt Lake City  
_ _ Waiting for the other girls to   
_ _ arrive _

[Tobin]  
_ Glad you’re safe  
_ _ Jsyk we can talk whenever  
_ _ We don’t have to wait for LA  
_ _ If you want  
_ _ Just let me know _

[Christen]  
_ I’d really like for us to talk face   
_ _ to face _

[Tobin]  
_ Okay, I’ll wait  
_ *  
[Allie]  
_ Did you have a fight?  
_ _ Press looks like a wreck  
_ _ As much as gorgeous people   
_ _ can look like a wreck anyway _

[Tobin]  
_ She does? :(  
_ _ Yes, we did  
_ _ Sorry, I’m still at work. Can I tell   
_ _ you more later? _

[Allie]  
_ Huh  
_ _ That’s what this is about isn’t it? _

Tobin can only roll her eyes.  
*  
[Allie]  
_ Okay, I got her side of the story  
_ _ What’s yours? _

*

[Kelley]  
_ So what’s the plan?  
_ _ What grand romantic gesture   
_ _ have you got up your sleeve? _

[Tobin]  
_ What do you mean? _

[Kelley]  
_ Al told me _

[Tobin]  
_ Which one? _

[Kelley]  
_ All 3 of them. But never mind   
_ _ that. What are we gonna do   
_ _ about Press, tomato?  
_ _ Will you show up in Salt Lake   
_ _ or Rochester? _

[Tobin]  
_ I don’t think she’ll appreciate   
_ _ that kind of gesture right now _

[Kelley]  
_ Boo  
_ *  
_ Kelley created group “Worms, Janice, Harry & Harry” _

[Kelley]  
_ Okay, listen up  
_ _ Toaster’s got a request _

[Alex]  
_ Ran out of nicknames so soon,   
_ _ Worms? I am so disappointed _

[Kelley]  
_ I meant Tobster!  
_ _ Damn autocorrect   
_ _ Anyway, bygones _

[Alex]  
_ Lol what’s up, Tobs? _

[Tobin]  
_ Can you please help me make   
_ _ Chris’ days more pleasant? _

[Alex]  
_ Any specifics? _

[Tobin]  
_ I’m not really sure  
_ _ Like  
_ _ Can someone join her for   
_ _ meditation or yoga in the   
_ _ morning?  
_ _ Make sure she gets coffee  
_ _ Or doesn’t run out of fruit for   
_ _ breakfast? _

[Alex]  
_ I’ll do yoga! _

[Allie]  
_ I’ll get her coffee _

[Kelley]  
_ Fine  
_ _ I’ll take the fruit  
_ _ Do I need to send her a fruit   
_ _ basket? _

*

[Kelley]  
_ What else can we do,   
_ _ Toblerone? _

[Tobin]  
_ Please make her laugh _

[Kelley]  
_ Now you’re talking _

[Tobin]  
_ No pranks!!! _

[Allie]  
_ Damnit _

[Kelley]  
_ Party pooper _

*

[Tobin]  
_ Can you please bring her to a   
_ _ nail salon for mani pedi on   
_ _ your day off? _

[Kelley]  
_ That depends  
_ _ Are you paying? _

[Tobin]  
_ Fine _

[Alex]  
_ Yesssssss!!!! _

[Tobin]  
_ But just for the 4 of you!!!! _

*

[Kelley]  
_ Pinoe just asked me what’s   
_ _ going on  
_ _ Now the other gals want in on it  
_ _ We need ideas, tootsie roll _

[Tobin]  
_ Maybe someone can shag the   
_ _ balls for her when she’s   
_ _ practicing her shots? _

[Alex]  
_ Glad we avoided that one _

[Kelley]  
_ Glad we don’t even have to   
_ _ assign that one   
_ _ P can handle it _

[Allie]  
_ What does that mean? _

[Alex]  
_ Press takes 100 shots at the   
_ _ end of training sessions  
_ _ With. Each. Foot. _

[Allie]  
_ Woah _

[Kelley]  
_ Yeah  
_ *  
[Alex]  
_ Wait  
_ _ Why are the other girlies not in  
_ _ this group chat if they’re helping   
_ _ out? _

[Kelley]  
_ Because I’m Tobin’s favorite   
_ _ I already told you that _

*

[Allie]  
_ Kell doesn’t know I’m your new   
_ _ favorite, does she?  
_ _ Don’t worry  
_ _ Your secret’s safe with me ;) _

[Tobin]  
_ Lol  
_ _ Love ya, Harry _

[Allie]  
_ Love ya, Harry _

*

[Christen]  
_ I figured it out _

[Tobin]  
_ What? _

[Christen]  
_ My teammates have been very   
_ _ nice to me the past 8 days  
_ _ I thought it was because of   
_ _ Allie but it’s not  
_ _ It’s because of you _

[Tobin]  
_ What gave me away? _

[Christen]  
_ Ash just told me a dorky deaf   
_ _ joke _

[Tobin]  
_ That’s what she used that for?! _

[Christen]  
_ Lol  
_ _ Thank you   
_ _ *hug emoji*  
_ _ I miss you _

Tobin can’t help but close her eyes, clasp her hands, and silently give thanks.

[Tobin]  
_ I miss you _

*

[Tobin]  
_ That assist was awesome!!!  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ You got to watch? _

[Tobin]  
_ I did! They let me stream it at   
_ _ the office _

[Christen]  
_ Thank you *hug emojis* _

*

[Tobin]  
_ Hope you won’t be too tired   
_ _ when you get to Rochester  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ It was super tiring but I don’t   
_ _ feel so bad  
_ _ We’re here now *hug emojis* _

[Tobin]  
_ Get some rest, love *hug emojis* _

[Christen]  
_ *heart kiss emojis* _

*

[Tobin]  
_ You can carry Alex???!!!  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ Yes?  
_ _ I struggled a bit in that goal   
_ _ celebration, but yes, I can _

[Tobin]  
_ That give and go with her was   
_ _ just *chef’s kiss* _

[Christen]  
_ Thanks  
_ _ Are you jealous? _

[Tobin]  
_ No _

[Christen]  
_ I can carry you, if that’s what   
_ _ you’re getting at ;)  
_ _ *  
_ _ Oh gosh _

[Tobin]  
_ What? _

[Christen]  
_ Now Alex’s fans think she and I   
_ _ are having an affair _

[Tobin]  
_ Hahahahahaha _

[Christen]  
_ Baaaaabe!!! *wah* _

[Tobin]  
_ *lots of heart kiss emojis*   
_ _ *rolling on the floor laughing* _

*

[Tobin]  
_ Safe travels to LA, babe  
_ _ Just 2 more days and I’ll be   
_ _ flying over to see you  
_ _ Please let me know when   
_ _ you’re in Charlotte  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ Just landed in Charlotte, babe  
_ _ Can’t wait to see you either _

[Tobin]  
_ *heart kiss emojis*  
_ _ How long is your layover? _

[Christen]  
_ Not too long *heart kiss emojis*  
_ *  
[Tobin]  
_ Are you boarding yet?  
_ _ *  
_ _ I assume you’re on your way to   
_ _ LA now  
_ _ Have a really nice flight  
_ _ *  
_ _ Just got invited to dinner by   
_ _ Casey and Zach and I’m thinking   
_ _ of going, depending on what time   
_ _ I’ll get off work  
_ _ *  
_ _ On my way to dinner with Casey   
_ _ and Zach  
_ _ Hope you’ve landed safely in LA  
_ _ *  
_ _ At dinner now  
_ _ Please let me know when you’re   
_ _ home?  
_ _ *  
_ _ Phone dying :(  
_ _ I’ll text again when I get home _

As per usual, Tobin and her friends go home only after the restaurant closes and they talk for a couple more minutes on the sidewalk.

It’s just before midnight when she gets home and her blood runs cold the moment she sees Christen hunched over her luggage, sitting at their doorstep.

Tobin grows even paler when it hits her that Christen doesn’t have a key (Christen used Alex’s key weeks ago) and could’ve been waiting for quite some time—she’s so glad Christen is safe.

She rushes by her side, strokes her back, unlocks the door, takes her luggage in one hand, and lifts her up with the other.

And Christen breaks down as soon as they walk through the door, sobbing and wrapping her arms around Tobin’s waist and leaning against Tobin’s side.

And when they get to Tobin’s room, Tobin is quick to sign, _ I’m sorry, I’m sorry. _

And Christen just cries. So Tobin just holds her.

But a few minutes later, she starts pulling away.

_ I’m so sorry, _ Tobin signs again. _ I would’ve gone home straight away, had I known. _

Christen shakes her head, then signs in between sobs. _ I’m sorry… I feel stupid… and exhausted… I just want to… shower… and go to bed… And I want… to be held… Can we do that? _

Tobin nods assuringly. _ Let me get you a— _

Christen darts to the bathroom.

_ —clean… towel. _

She gets pajamas and underwear for Christen instead, lays them on the bed, gets a towel for herself, runs to the third floor to take a really quick shower in Allie’s bathroom, and runs back to her room when she’s done.

Christen isn’t done. So Tobin turns on the bedside lamp, turns off the ceiling light, and sits on the bed, leg bouncing up and down while she waits.

But she doesn’t wait too long. Christen comes out of the bathroom in a towel soon after and Tobin awkwardly (and adorably) shows her the pajamas she readied for her.

_ Thank you, _Christen smiles faintly as she approaches.

Tobin surprises both of them by laying the pajamas back on the bed, then taking the underwear and holding it out low enough for Christen to step into. And she does, while resting a hand on Tobin’s shoulder for support, as Tobin slides it up her legs, her thighs, her waist.

Then Tobin picks up the shorts and does the same for it… then gets the shirt and stands up to place it over Christen’s head as Christen removes the towel off her body, then puts her arms through the sleeves. Then she rolls the shirt down as Tobin grabs the towel and goes to the bathroom to place it on a hook.

When she comes back, Christen is already lying in bed, on her side, with her back turned. And before Tobin can second-guess what to do next, Christen turns to her and extends a hand, which she promptly takes and holds as she turns off the lamp. Then she crawls into bed, spooning Christen and molding her body against hers… 

And they breathe a lot easier.

*

Christen wakes up with a start the next morning. 

She quickly checks the time, turns to Tobin, and looks surprised to see Tobin wide awake. _ Sweetheart, it’s almost nine. _

Tobin just nods.

_ Aren’t you late for work? _she asks.

Tobin shakes her head, _ I took a sick day. _

_ You did? _

_ I didn’t know if your flight back to LA is today or tomorrow. _

_ It’s tomorrow. _

_ Same as my flight? _

_ Yes. _

Tobin smiles softly, _ Do you wanna sleep some more or meditate or eat breakfast? _

_ Breakfast. Please. _

_ Okay, _Tobin gets up.

And Christen asks to go to the bathroom first.

But when she comes out, Tobin is sitting in bed and gesturing, _ Tadah! _

Beside her is a breakfast tray, with a bowl of muesli, a plate of fruit, and two cups of coffee.

Christen gapes in (pleasant) surprise as she walks back to the bed. _ Is this a revamped girlfriend privilege? _

_ No, this is a revamped girlfriend groveling for forgiveness. _

_ Which means I also owe you breakfast in bed. _

_ We’re counting second and third breakfasts, right? _

Their lips curl into delicious smiles. And they share their first kiss since Christen arrived.

_ Good morning, love, _Tobin grins.

_ Good morning, love, _Christen grins back.

And they eat breakfast happily, side by side.

But the awkwardness seeps in once they have finished their food and are about to finish their coffee.

_ Are we… talking now? _Christen asks.

_ If you want to, _ Tobin answers. _ Might as well, right? _

_ Can we meditate first? _

They meditate first (or second, really), after Tobin brings the breakfast tray to her desk.

And when Tobin opens her eyes minutes later, back resting against the headboard, her head instinctively turns towards Christen. And she can’t help but sigh… and stare… and smile as Christen opens her eyes and turns her head instinctively towards Tobin and smiles back.

Christen leans in for a kiss or two (or four), before sliding down the bed and lying on her side, facing Tobin.

Tobin follows Christen’s lead and lies on her side, facing Christen, then asks, _ Are you more comfortable talking like this? _

_ Isn’t this how we usually talk? _

_ Yes, but we’re usually naked, too. _

_ Do you want to get naked? _

_ Soon. For sure. _

Christen giggles, _ But not right now. _

_ No, not right now. _

_ Are you doubting our self-control? _

_ It’s been two weeks. _

_ A little over two weeks. _

_ See. _

Christen laughs. 

And they just stare at each other for a while… until Tobin sighs and signs with all the sincerity she can muster, _ I’m so sorry… I don’t want to make you feel neglected ever again… so, what can I do to avoid that, my love? _

Tears immediately start welling up in Christen’s eyes and she can’t help but lean forward and give Tobin a kiss that feels grateful and repentant, uplifting and soothing, moving and lustful all at once. And Tobin responds in kind… until Christen pulls away, breathless, lips swollen, eyes bright and happy.

Tobin beams, _ You’re kissing me like you wanna get naked now. _

Christen laughs again.

Then Tobin’s smile softens. _ But you do have things to get off your chest, don’t you? _

Christen nods.

_ I’m all yours, love… _

Christen takes a deep breath and sighs. Then she starts opening up and tells Tobin when the fear started (as soon as Tobin got the job offer) and how the feeling started (after the game on Alex’s birthday)... how it grew every time the three roommates would go out on adventures and she’d only know about them afterwards, not beforehand… how it hit her hard when Tobin didn’t ask her how she felt about Tobin giving up on job opportunities in Chicago… how it worsened on her last visit… 

_ I’m sorry I came here with skewed expectations, _ Christen admits. _ I was so used to—and very fond of—our routine in LA that I couldn’t handle the changes. To me, it automatically felt like you were more eager to get to work than spend time with me in the morning most days… like you were so caught up with work you rarely thought of texting me during the day… like your job was more important than me, like Portland was more important than me. _

_ I’m so sorry… I’m so sorry, my love… I should’ve asked you about wanting to stop applying for jobs in Chicago instead of just telling you out of frustration. I should’ve done better during your stay. How can I do that? How can I do better next time? There’s a next time, right? You’ll stay here again? _

_ Yes, of course, I’ll come and stay here as often and as long as I can. _

_ But? _

_ Can I ask you something? _

_ Yes, of course. _

_ Do you really want to stay here indefinitely? _

Tobin sighs, _ I haven’t really stopped to think about it, to be honest. All I know so far is that I really like it here and I really like my job and my workplace here. I’ve gained new Deaf friends—you should meet them soon, my love—they’re hilarious. But… I don’t want to lose you. I don’t want to ever lose you. If staying here means losing you, then I don’t want to. _

_ Sweetheart, I want you to be happy. If staying here makes you happy, then we’ll make it work. _

_ But I also want you to be happy. _

_ I’ll be happy as long as you love me. _

_ I would break out into song and dance if I could— _

Christen snorts.

_ —but I couldn’t. _

_ I’m in love with a dork. _

_ Your dork. _

_ I’m so in love with you, my dork. Please don’t stop loving me. _

Tobin leans forward and answers Christen with a kiss that says, ‘I won’t,’ ‘Not now,’ ‘Not once,’ ‘Not ever.’

And when she pulls away, Christen has a dreamy smile on her face, _ You just kissed me like you want to get naked with me. _

Tobin laughs, _ Do you want to know a secret? _

Christen nods adorably.

_ I want to get naked with you all— _

_ I knew it! _

_ —the time. _

They both laugh heartily… and kiss again… 

_ Can we get naked now? _

*

They continue talking after getting naked and ordering lunch, during lunch, after lunch, after getting naked again and taking an afternoon nap, during dinner, after dinner and before getting naked well into the night.

*

They sleep on the plane the next morning.

*

In LA later that evening, and after submitting her online health magazine article, Tobin shows up at a restaurant downtown, for a post-wedding-rehearsal dinner with the Presses, the would-be in-laws, and their friends—in a little black dress.

Christen drools.

She quickly excuses herself from the table and beams as she walks over to Tobin—in a tight-fitting, long black dress.

Tobin drools.

And when Christen leans in, Tobin turns her head, mistaking Christen’s kiss on the cheek for a kiss on the lips—she blushes a little.

Christen smirks, _ You look absolutely ravishing, my love. _

Tobin quickly recovers and smirks back, _ You can absolutely ravish me, my love. _

Christen rolls her eyes (but doesn’t stop beaming), drags Tobin by the hand to the table, and introduces her to everyone she hasn’t met.

They torture each other throughout dinner—which starts innocently enough with Christen’s hand resting on Tobin’s knee… becomes more and more risqué as the night wears on… and ends with Christen’s fingers slipping under the hem of Tobin’s dress and Tobin’s thumb stroking the apex of Christen’s thighs over the fabric of her dress.

(They prove, later that night, that dresses indeed look better on the bedroom floor.)

*

Christen walking down the aisle—in a rose gold, spaghetti-strapped, sequin dress, with her hair half up, holding a bouquet of pink and red roses in one hand and Morena’s leash in the other—takes Tobin’s breath away the next day.

(Yes, Tobin may have shed a few tears when the ceremony starts—Christen is just so beautiful, okay?)

The effect is the same when Christen walks in with the wedding party at the reception. But the difference is, Christen goes straight to Tobin after her introduction, all smiles and radiant, reaching out to Tobin with both hands when she’s near, then giving Tobin a peck on the lips.

_ You’re so beautiful, my love, _they tell each other.

(Tobin is wearing a sleeveless, knee-length, silver gray sequin dress, with her hair also half up and her smile just as radiant.)

They hold hands, standing side by side, as they watch the bride and groom join the reception to resounding applause and walk to the middle of the dance floor for their first dance.

Tobin feels the music building up. And when the vocal and the beat kick in, the song feels like one of those incredibly moving, bluesy, classic Motown ballads the Presses like to listen to. And she can’t help but sway along.

Christen looks at her with an amused smile and Tobin suddenly looks sheepish. But then Christen moves in front of Tobin, wraps her free arm around Tobin’s neck, and starts swaying along, with their bodies flushed against each other. And Tobin instinctively brings their clasped hands up between their chests and wraps her other arm around Christen’s waist. And they’re slow dancing in their own little corner, with eyes only for each other, and everything else just fades away… 

*

[Tobin]  
_ I miss you already   
_ _ Just landed in PDX, my love _

[Christen]  
_ I miss you already  
_ _ Get to the office safe, my love  
_ _ Kiss you in 6 days *heart kiss emojis* _

[Tobin]  
_ Can’t wait *heart kiss emojis _

Tobin goes back to work that Monday, while Christen stays in LA for a scheduled date night with her mom on Friday.

Parting still isn’t easy. But they take comfort in the fact that they’ve talked, with clear expectations of what they need from each other, and this time around, Christen will stay in Portland longer than in LA.

*

Tobin gets an unexpected, but very much welcome text on Wednesday.

[Unknown Number]  
_ Hey, Tobin. Becky here. Chris   
_ _ told me you turned off Instagram   
_ _ notifications so she gave me   
_ _ your number. I hope you don’t   
_ _ mind. Are you doing anything on   
_ _ Saturday? _

*

Becky looks mighty pleased with herself when Tobin’s face lights up the moment she takes a bite of the wood-fired pizza at Ken’s Artisan Pizza on Saturday. 

It’s just as good as Pok Pok chicken wings and 808 Grinds fried chicken. And Tobin starts gushing about it and all her favorites so far, which makes Becky gush about all her favorites since moving late last year, which turns their conversation into a gush fest about Portland—its food, its breweries and coffee shops, the outdoorsiness, Powell’s.

“It’s a city that kind of… called to me on so many different levels,” Becky says.

Tobin types on her phone, then shows it to Becky, _ You’re in love with Portland. _

“Yes. And so are you.”

Tobin sighs… But then, they smile at each other and Tobin concedes with a nod.

“Does Chris know?”

_ …I think she has an inkling. _

“Do you see yourself staying here permanently?”

_ …It’s looking more and more likely. _

“But you’re worried.”

Tobin nods.

“What are you most worried about?”

_ …Is it possible for Chris to love it here as much as I do? _

“Oh, that’s a tough one,” Becky admits. “She’s a California girl through and through.”

Tobin nods.

“But she’s in love with you.”

_ …That’s true. _ Tobin smiles dreamily, then asks _ … Would you ever request for a trade? _

Becky smiles back knowingly, “That would be the dream, wouldn’t it?”

*

Tobin’s dream walks up to her at the airport the next day, beaming and wearing her usual airplane uniform of brand name sweatsuit.

Tobin is also wearing a pair of joggers, with one of her white t-shirts, her Air Jordans, and her Supreme hat. And she’s grinning from ear to ear.

_ What’s got you so happy? _Christen asks.

_ We’re going on a date! _

_ Are we? _

_ Yes! _

_ You haven’t— _

_ Go on a date with me? _

Christen just smiles.

_ Please? _

_ Let me think about it… _ Christen taps her chin with her index finger a couple of times before she stops and smirks. _ Only if we don’t need to change outfits. _

_ Dream date. Honestly. _

Christen laughs.

*

They start their new routine the next day, waking up early to make sure they spend quality time in the morning before Tobin goes to work since her end-of-days are unpredictable.

And while at work, Tobin remembers to text Christen whenever she takes a break. And if Christen happens to text her first, she stops what she’s doing and takes the time to chat with Christen.

They both agree that Christen should always eat dinner on time, whether Tobin is home or not. _ (Baby, you going hangry plus me being stupid is as bad a combination as me being exhausted and you not wanting to talk, _Tobin points out.) But if Tobin happens to text around 6:30pm that she’s on her way home, Christen can’t help but wait.

They still have the apartment all to themselves for Christen’s 15-day stay (because Al and Al are with their respective families and boyfriends). And they do their best not to have sex in every possible spot on the second floor, on every piece of furniture. But it gets harder and harder as they get more and more reasons to celebrate.

“Babe,” Christen greets Tobin with a shit-eating grin in midweek, “I made the World Cup qualifying roster!”

Cue squealing and kissing.

*

[Christen]  
_ Babe, my agent apparently   
_ _ told Nike I was here  
_ _ They’ve just invited me to train   
_ _ at their headquarters!!! _

[Tobin]  
_ Yes!!!!!!  
_ _ You’re gonna be a Nike athlete   
_ _ soon!!! I can feel it!!!!!   
_ _ My Harry Potter senses are   
_ _ tingling!!! _

*

_ Honey, what’s wrong? _Tobin asks, looking so concerned, when she sees the expression on Christen’s face.

Christen cups Tobin’s face and kisses Tobin with everything she has…_ You were right. _

_ About what? _

Christen beams so hard her skin is clear, her curls are divine, their imaginary crops are flourishing, and Tobin is hydrated to the max. _ I’m a Nike athlete!!! _

They tear their clothes off faster than they can sign swoosh.

*

_ Baby, I have not-so-good news, _Christen tells Tobin after greeting her with a kiss.

_ What is it? _

_ I’m scheduled to shoot an ad for Nike in November. _

_ What’s not so good about that? _

_ It won’t be here. _

_ Where, then? _

_ Hawaii. _

_ No!!!! _ Tobin despairs in exaggeration. _ I can’t come with!!! _

_ But I can hula dance for you? _

Tobin stops. _ In a grass skirt and nothing else? _

*

They go to the beach.

And the way Christen’s face lights up when they arrive makes Tobin forget that she can’t travel to Hawaii with Christen.

_ We’re spending the night here? _Christen asks.

Tobin beams, playfully signing, _ Surprise! _

And Christen looks like she falls in love all over again.

It’s their last weekend together before Christen flies out for World Cup qualifying and Tobin has brought them to Cannon Beach, a coastal city less than two hours away from Portland. 

Christen can’t stop smiling… 

They take a stroll on the beach, with waves lapping at their bare feet… 

They soak in the majesty of Haystack Rock… 

They browse through art galleries and other shops downtown… 

They dine at a beachside restaurant, with stunning panoramic views, at sunset… 

They snuggle by the campfire that the beachfront resort staff built for them… 

And the way Christen has been looking at Tobin tells her that she’s in for a really long (and gratifying) night.

*

[Christen]  
_ Babe _

[Tobin]  
_ Yes babe  
_ _ Miss me? *grinning face with smiling eyes emoji* _

[Christen]  
_ Lol I do *heart* *heart* _

Christen is in DC for the national team’s third and final group stage match against Haiti, before playing in the must-win semifinal. (They’ve already clinched a spot after winning the first two matches against Guatemala and Trinidad and Tobago.)

[Christen]  
_ I know you’re still at work  
_ _ But can we FaceTime? _

[Tobin]  
_ Of course, my love  
_ _ I’ll look for an empty huddle   
_ _ room _

[Christen]  
_ You’ll need your computer for   
_ _ this actually   
_ _ I have breaking news _

Tobin calls right away, propping up her phone against her desktop monitor. _ What breaking news? _ she asks as soon as the call connects.

_ Wow, _ Christen smirks, _ not even a ‘Hi, my love?’ _

_ I’m sorry. Hi, my love. Is it about you? _

Christen shakes her head, with a softer smile. _ Do you have something to take notes with? _

_ The news is that big? _

Christen nods.

_ Wait. It’s something I should write about? _

Christen nods again.

_ Okay. _ Tobin opens a new sticky note. _ What is it? _

_ Alex is transferring to Orlando. _

_ What?! _

_ She wants you to break the news before other journalists get wind of it. _

_ There’s a new team in Orlando?! _

_ By tomorrow, there will be. _

_ Holy shit. _

_ I know, right? _Christen sighs, before telling Tobin that Alex’s long-time boyfriend, who is also a soccer player, got traded to the Orlando City Soccer Club mid season… that the club approached Alex after the trade to confirm the rumor that they are forming a women’s team and joining the NWSL… that the team will officially be unveiled tomorrow… that Alex has requested for the trade to be with her boyfriend and the Thorns only agreed because it was for personal reasons… that in exchange, the Thorns will get two international roster spots in the next two years, the number one pick in the College Draft next year, and the number one pick in the Expansion Draft on November 2nd, which will most likely be Kling, in a super messy trade involving four teams.

_ It… can’t be you? _Tobin asks.

Christen suddenly looks woeful as she sighs again, _ I’m so sorry, my love. _

_ You can’t be traded, _Tobin realizes.

Christen nods, _ Chicago is putting me in the protected players list. _

Tobin doesn’t notice a tear rolling down her face until it’s too late—she quickly wipes it away. _ I’m sorry. _

_ Tobin… _

_ Yes, love. _

_ I love you. _

_ I love you, Chris. _

_ I wish I could hold you and kiss you right now. _

_ Me, too. _

_ I’m sorry I’m two thousand miles away. _

_ But not for long. _

_ No, not for long. I’ll be back in your arms in eight days, my love. _

Tobin smiles.

_ Right now, you have an article to write though. _

Tobin nods, _ Please thank Alex for me. _

_ I will. I need to tell her that we’ve talked. _

_ Thank you. I’ll text Harry later. _

_ I’m sure she already knows. But yes, you need to talk. _

Tobin nods again.

_ Okay, go get those clicks. I’ll give you the equivalent number of licks later. _

Tobin's face lights up instantly,_ Now, that’s a trade I can get behind, my love! _

And they both laugh.  
*  
Tobin’s two editors are understandably skeptical (and shocked) when Tobin sends them her draft. But she comes clean and tells them that Alex is her roommate (or was her roommate), then shows them Alex’s Instagram posts as proof. 

They let her run the story. And it becomes Tobin’s most viewed article to date. 

(Needless to say, Tobin is so looking forward to those licks.)  
*  
[Allie]  
_ Clicked and read!  
_ _ Great article Harry _

[Tobin]  
_ Thanks, Harry  
_ _ How’re you feeling? _

[Allie]  
_ A little sad tbh  
_ _ You? _

[Tobin]  
_ Same  
_ _ But I’m happy for Al _

[Allie]  
_ Me too  
_ _ And I’m really not surprised   
_ _ I mean, she’s been going on   
_ _ and on about wanting to get   
_ _ married all year  
_ _ All year Harry!! _

[Tobin]  
_ Lol has her boyfriend proposed   
_ _ yet? _

[Allie]  
_ No not yet  
_ _ But I’m sure he will soon _

[Tobin]  
_ What about your boyfriend? _

[Allie]  
_ Well, Bati hasn’t proposed yet   
_ _ either  
_ _ Proposed as in asked me to   
_ _ marry him anyway  
_ _ But he did propose something   
_ _ else _

[Tobin]  
_ Ohmygosh he did??  
_ _ Gimme the scoop, Harry!! _

[Allie]  
_ He volunteered to leave NYC   
_ _ and move to Portland for me  
_ _ Said we should finally move in   
_ _ together _

[Tobin]  
_ What?!!  
_ _ Did you say yes??? _

[Allie]  
_ Of course I said yes Harry!!! _

[Tobin]  
_ Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!!! _

[Allie]  
_ :D :D :D _

[Tobin]  
_ That’s so awesome!! I’m so   
_ _ happy for you!!! _

[Allie]  
_ Thanks Harry!!! *hug emojis* _

[Tobin]  
_ Do you wanna get a place of   
_ _ your own?  
_ _ Not keep the apartment? _

[Allie]  
_ Is that ok?   
_ _ Will you be ok? _

[Tobin]  
_ I’ll be fine. Don’t worry about me  
_ _ I’ll start looking for a new place,   
_ _ too _

[Allie]  
_ Hey, maybe we can be   
_ _ neighbors??!  
_ _ Wouldn’t that be awesome?!! _

*

[Tobin]  
_ That was totally awesome!!!  
_ _ Congratulations, my love!!!  
_ _ You’re going to the World   
_ _ Cup!!!! I’m so proud of you!!!!  
_ _ I love you I love you I love you  
_ _ I love youuuuuuu  
_ *  
[Christen]  
_ I love you I love you I love you  
_ _ I love youuuuuuu   
_ _ *heart eyes emojis*  
_ _ Kiss you tomorrow!!! _

*

Winning a tournament is a mind-blowing aphrodisiac, Tobin learns. And they celebrate like there’s no tomorrow when Christen comes—back to Portland. Under Tobin. On top of Tobin. On the carpet. On the desk. In the shower. Twice that evening. Then, in bed.

Tobin goes to work sore (in the best way) in the next three days, but nothing can wipe away the blissful smirk on her face.

Christen is a (sexy) bundle of energy. And she wants to start looking for a new apartment but Tobin puts her foot down, telling Christen that, yes, she can start an online search while they wait for Tobin’s Deaf friends’ recommendations, but, no, they will not visit any apartments during Christen’s shorter six-day stay because, one, Tobin can do it while Christen is away for two weeks, two, they will visit the ones on Tobin’s shortlist when Christen comes back, and, three, Christen needs to relax. She deserves it.

So, in the spirit of relaxation, Tobin books an overnight stay in a small cabin in Mt. Hood for the weekend. And while Christen’s face doesn’t light up immediately when they get there (like it did in Cannon Beach), she visibly relaxes and can’t stop snuggling up against Tobin.

She sighs contentedly in Tobin’s arms that night, as they lay on a sleeping bag on top of a picnic table underneath the stars, with the cabin lights off, marveling at the Milky Way… 

And when she turns to look at Tobin… then cradles Tobin’s face in her hand… and presses her lips to Tobin’s neck… Tobin just knows… this is right where they should be.

*

None of the places Tobin checks the following weekend feel right. Not completely anyway. There are two that are… okay… and can seriously be considered. But they aren’t calling to her as strongly as she hoped they would.

So when she gets another unexpected text a few days later, it feels like a sign.

[Unknown Number]  
_ Hey Tobs! Wanna go apt.   
_ _ hunting with me on Saturday?  
_ _ Be there Friday night - Kling _

*

Kling meets with Tobin and a realtor that Saturday. A REALTOR®️. Who looks at them funny because they’re so engrossed with their phones and giggling a lot. Kling tells the realtor that Tobin is Deaf to explain the texting. But they’re really just poking fun at little things and making each other laugh.

[Tobin]  
_ Look at this doorknob  
_ _ It’s so shiny! _

[Kling]  
_ There’s a bidet in this   
_ _ bathroom!  
_ _ I wanna live here _

[Tobin]  
_ This cupboard doesn’t come   
_ _ with Harry Potter   
_ _ I am so disappointed _

[Kling]  
(Standing in front of a floor-to-ceiling mirror)  
_ This is it  
_ _ I can totally see myself in this   
_ _ apartment _

[Tobin]  
(Sliding beside Kling)  
_ You’re totally right  
_ _ I can see you in this, too _

The realtor gets the last laugh though, when she brings them to a high rise condominium and shows them a one-bedroom unit and two studios. Suddenly, the giggling stops and the two are seriously paying attention.

They’re in the second studio unit at the 8th floor, with the same L-shape layout as the first one (only mirrored), with the bathroom right next to the front door, a built-in closet against the bathroom wall, then a space for a bed, which opens up to the living space by the glass door (with no balcony to open to) and large glass windows and the kitchen with a small island.

It offers a really nice view of downtown Portland, with Mt. Hood in the background, and Tobin can only sigh.

[Kling]  
_ You like this one? _

[Tobin]  
_ I do _

[Kling]  
_ I like the other one better _

[Tobin]  
_ Are you gonna get it? _

[Kling]  
_ I need to crunch numbers   
_ _ first but yeah I think so  
_ _ Hard to beat the convenience   
_ _ and proximity to the stadium  
_ _ What about you? _

[Tobin]  
_ I don’t think I can afford it _

[Kling]  
_ Wanna check if you really   
_ _ can’t?  
_ _ I can help you with the math  
_ _ I’m good with that _

*

[Tobin]  
_ Hi Big Daddy _

[Cody]  
_ You in trouble? _

[Tobin]  
_ No sir  
_ _ I need to ask you something _

[Cody]  
_ Ooh I’m lovin this already _

*

Tobin brings Christen to the shortlisted apartments, plus two new ones, the following Saturday, when she’s back from Hawaii.

As expected, Christen has some (logically) good things to say about them. But her feedback is also undeniably lukewarm.

So when Tobin brings her to the condominium and her eyebrows rise with interest, seeing where the building is located, Tobin feels a little hopeful.

A building staff accompanies them to the 8th floor, opens the unit for them, and leaves the key ring with the key to Tobin.

They leisurely walk inside, holding hands. But Tobin can’t keep her chill.

_ That washer in the corner inside the closet is so awkward, especially because the bed will be right here, next to it, but it saves space, I guess… We can just put a divider here for privacy… and a dresser or a shelf there, in front of the bed… then the TV on this wall… with the couch right there… _

Christen gives her an amused smile and walks right in front of the glass door, looking out to the city below, bathed in the bright orange glow of the late afternoon sun.

Tobin stands next to her and stays silent for a moment, before asking, _ How do you feel about this one, my love? _

Christen gives her a soft smile, _ Is it weird if I say it… feels right? _

_ No, not at all. _

_ Do you like it? _Christen asks.

Tobin nods.

_ But? _

_ It’s not for rent. _

Christen freezes, but quickly recovers. _ You’re looking into buying it? _

_ Kling helped me with the math… We figured out how I can afford to pay the mortgage… Big Daddy will help me get the loan. _

_ He will? _

Tobin nods again.

_ Baby, this is… permanent. _

_ Which is why I’ll only seriously consider and push through with it under one condition. _

_ Which is? _

Tobin takes a deep breath and holds Christen’s hands. Then, she stares into Christen’s eyes as she strokes the backs of Christen’s hands with her thumb. Then, she gets down on one knee.

Christen gasps, wide-eyed. “Babe, we’re not ready.”

Tobin grins, _ I know… I’m not gonna ask you what you think I’m gonna ask you. _

“Then, why are you down on one knee?”

_ Because I’m extra. _

Christen stops herself from grinning so wide but not from rolling her eyes. “Tobin—”

_ Christen. _

“—babe, please get up.”

_ No, I don’t wanna. _

“Fine.” Christen gets down on one knee.

And it’s Tobin’s turn to gasp.

But before Tobin can sign anything, Christen takes Tobin’s right hand with both hands and places Tobin’s palm over her heart, which is beating just as wildly as Tobin’s heart.

_ Did I… scare… you? _Tobin asks with one hand.

Christen shakes her head and releases Tobin’s hand to confess, _ I scared myself at how fast and easy it was for me to love the thought of marrying you. _

Tobin starts breathing heavily as she beams, _ I really, really… really, really… really, really want to get to that point with you, my love. _

_ Me, too. _

_ But you’re right… We’re not ready. _

Christen nods, with a beautiful, hopeful smile, _ Someday. _

_ Someday, _Tobin repeats and smiles back the same way.

_ And now? _

_ Now, I wish I could hold you while I signed. _

Christen beams, then places her hands on Tobin’s waist. “I could hold you while you signed, my love.”

Tobin beams back, then cups Christen’s face with both hands and kisses her with all the love she has for her. _ I love you. _

“I love you.”

_ Your family is in LA, _Tobin starts.

And Christen holds her breath, immediately recognizing where this is going.

_ Your work is in Chicago, _ Tobin continues, _ and I’m… here… but… _

Christen nods in encouragement.

_ …could you… would you… call Portland… home? _

Happy tears start welling up in Christen’s eyes as she beams. “Is this how you pictured asking me?”

Tobin shakes her head and takes the unit key from her pocket and holds the key ring as if it were a ring.

Christen laughs, gives Tobin a lingering kiss, then offers her left hand.

And the joy on Tobin’s face is blinding as she puts the key ring on Christen’s finger, then turns Christen’s palm up to close it, for Christen to hold the key. _ So that’s a yes, right? _

Christen looks absolutely smitten as she nods, “I’ve known for a while now, love.”

_ What? _

“Home is wherever I’m with you.”

***

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope that felt like the end because it is. Chapter 9 is the epilogue.
> 
> Thanks to lucianafromnaples, who got mad at me by the end of chapter 5 because we fought and said she's not interested in this anymore but actually continued to read. And now she's back to claim 6 chapters of this fic even though the story and the words are all mine.
> 
> Thanks to 7 Preathfics discord members who contributed a line to this fic, all of whom are named here.
> 
> And most of all, thanks to you, for seeing this through.


	9. More

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe it's been almost a year since I started writing this fic and now it's finally done.
> 
> Thanks to lucianafromnaples, mjacton, and Miss Tetay, without whom writing this would've been less fun.
> 
> Thanks to memoized, MarRed2020, and JCAL (who read the first 1k words of this chapter) and to Heath17_KO5 (who got one line) for their feedback and suggestions, which led me to the direction I wanted to go when I was still struggling.
> 
> Thanks to everyone who left kudos and most especially to everyone who left comments. I could never enjoy my own fics because I know everything about it. But your comments have given me a glimpse of what it could be like so thank you.
> 
> The kisses, the flirting, and NJ are for Heath17_KO5 and MarRed2020. And Chicago is for Little_oblivion. Everything else is for you. Thanks for coming along for the ride :)

Tobin hopes to get lucky tonight.

It’s 9pm on New Year’s Day and she’s sitting at the counter in a hotel bar in Venice Beach, nursing a beer, and wearing a very flattering, short sleeve denim button down shirt—with the top buttons left undone and the sleeves rolled up—a black snapback over long, sunkissed hair, ripped black jeans, and… flip flops.

A woman and a man have already offered to buy her drinks but she politely declines, telling them through her phone that she’s waiting for someone.

She’s waiting for the one.

Then, in walks a goddess with strikingly beautiful eyes, soft, wavy hair, and legs for days—in a pair of tight-fitting, high-waisted, black short shorts, a loose, sleeveless black crop top with a V neckline, and white dress sandals—and all heads automatically turn. 

Except one.

When Tobin catches a glimpse, she turns away, puts her game face on, takes another sip of her ice cold beer, and starts fiddling with her phone.

Soon after, smooth, tan legs drape over the bar stool next to hers and Tobin finds herself locking eyes with the goddess on her left, who immediately asks, “Is this seat taken?”

Tobin coolly shakes her head no.

“Glad it isn’t,” the goddess says and Tobin swears she’s flirting a little as their gazes linger on each other… But the bartender shows up and interrupts their moment, making the goddess turn to her and ask, “I’m sorry, what?”

“A drink,” the bartender says, moving a margarita glass on a coaster closer to the goddess, “from McHottie on your right.”

“Uh, thanks,” the goddess tells the bartender before turning to Tobin, with a raised eyebrow, as if asking, ‘Really? McHottie?’

Tobin answers with a one-shoulder shrug and a cocky air, before raising her beer in salute.

The goddess does the same with her margarita, then takes a sip… 

She’s about to put her glass back on the coaster when writing in red sharpie catches her attention. So she picks up the coaster with her free hand, reads the writing on it, and gives Tobin a questioning look.

Tobin nods her head once.

And the goddess takes another look before placing it back on the bar, along with her drink. 

It reads, _ ‘Hi, I’m Tobin, I’m Deaf & It must be my lucky night’ _

The goddess smirks at Tobin, then signs, _ It really must be. I know ASL. _

Tobin smirks back, then signs, _ So you’re perfect… _

_ Nobody’s perfect. _

_ …for me. _

The goddess stops herself from smiling, then asks, _ Does that line ever work? _

_ Tell me your name and I’ll tell you if it does. _

She surveys Tobin’s face with a twinkle in her eyes, before spelling out, _ Christen. My name is Christen. _

_ Aha! It works! _Tobin grins.

And Christen almost laughs. But she turns away to hide her face, takes a deep breath, then picks up her glass and takes another sip, before turning to Tobin again and shaking her head. “You’re incorrigible…”

_ I’ve been told, _Tobin replies, still grinning.

“...and a lip reader, to boot, apparently.”

_ I can do more than read your lips, darling. _

Christen lets out a full smile, sets her glass back down on the bar, then signs,_ I set myself up for that one, didn’t I? _

Tobin nods smugly, _ Yes, you did. Do you want to set yourself up for more? _

_ Maybe. _

_ Oh, this I gotta see. _

_ Where are you from? _

_ What makes you think I’m not from around here? _

_ Just a hunch… You’ve got the beach hair— _ Christen looks down at Tobin’s feet _ —the flip flops— _ and runs her fingers lightly down Tobin’s arm, which makes Tobin shiver _ —and the tan… But something tells me you’re not from LA. _

_ You got me there. _ Tobin’s confident grin falters a little. _ I’m originally from New Jersey. But now, I live in Portland. _

_ I see… And are you here for business… or pleasure? _

_ Pleasure. Definitely. _ Tobin answers as they share a steady intent look before she asks, _ You? _

_ Pleasure. Definitely. _

_ I was hoping you’d say that. _

_ Oh, you were, were you? _

Tobin nods and reaches for her beer. And Christen does the same with her margarita. And they salute each other again before taking another sip and placing their drinks back on the bar.

_ Are you from around here? _Tobin asks.

_ Yes. But I’m also just visiting. _

Tobin raises both eyebrows in surprise._ Where do you live? _

Christen smiles and waits a beat before answering,_ Portland. _

_ It really is my lucky night. _

Christen laughs, _ What do you do in Portland? _

_ I’m a professional soccer player, _Tobin smirks.

_ Oh, really? _ Christen raises an eyebrow again. _ For the Portland Thorns? _

Tobin nods, _ And the national team. _

_ So you play for two teams. _

_ Just one, really. _

_ Which one? _

_ Yours. _

Christen’s tickled smile says, ‘Yeah, I set myself up for that one, too,’ before she sighs. _ Now, I kind of don’t want to ask my next question. _

_ Oh, come on, _ Tobin teases. _ You know you want to. _

Christen narrows her eyes a little. _ Fine. What position do you play? _

Tobin beams, _ I’m a keeper. _

And Christen can’t help but giggle, head turning away a little on instinct, before looking at Tobin again. _ I’m sure you are. _

_ What do you do? _

_ I’m a lawyer. _

_ Oh, really? _ Tobin raises an eyebrow. _ Criminal? _

_ Yes. Just like how hot you are. _

Tobin slowly wets her lips, drawing Christen’s gaze, then puts on a self-satisfied smirk. _ You think I’m hot? _

_ I have eyes. _

_ Yes. And they are absolutely stunning. _

Christen’s lips part a little as she takes a deep breath and her body instinctively leans in before she catches herself. And when she does, she makes a show of slowly biting her lower lip.

Tobin visibly gulps.

_ Do you make it a habit… of seducing women in bars? _

Tobin can’t make a wrong move now. She stares into Christen’s eyes before blatantly gazing down at her lips… then up again._ No, but I could make a habit of seducing you every chance I get. _

“Don’t ever stop…” Christen breathes out so softly Tobin almost misses it as they stare hungrily at each other’s lips.

Then, slowly… smoothly… Tobin leans closer… and closer… until she stops, with her face inches away from Christen’s face… places her left hand gingerly on top of Christen’s hand resting on Christen’s thigh… and wraps her hand around it just as Christen wraps her hand around Tobin’s fingers, with Tobin’s thumb stroking the back of her hand… 

Christen’s breathing grows deep and heavy as Tobin brings Christen’s hand to her lips to kiss it—Christen closes her eyes… then opens them to see Tobin bringing their clasped hands down to her knee, dropping the arrogant facade, and revealing the ace up her sleeve.

She brings out the heart eyes.

And Christen melts… gazing dreamily at Tobin with a soft smile on her face… But then she realizes how she must’ve looked—eyes widening a little before she closes them again (because damn it she’s weak), bows her head and sighs… in annoyance, in affection, in surrender… When she looks at Tobin again, she admits defeat and mouths, “I have a room upstairs…”

Tobin tries to contain her glee as she lets Christen’s hand go and replies, _ So do I. _

_ Does it offer a stunning view? _

_ Of my abs. _

_ And I can’t have that same view in my room? _

_ You can. But there’s also the matter of a new toy, which I’m pretty sure I’ve just won the right to wear, hidden in a spot only I know about, _ Tobin pauses, _ in my room. _

Christen rolls her eyes,_ You just had to rub it in. _

_ I hope you won’t complain when I really rub it in later. _

Their lips twitch as if they’re trying to stop themselves from grinning but their eyes are full of mirth and Christen forces herself to look away. She grabs her margarita and takes two gulps, then places the glass back on the bar and takes the coaster before turning to Tobin again. “Fine. Your room.”

A delicious smile blooms on Tobin’s face as Christen slides off the stool and starts walking away. And it doesn’t leave her face as she takes a few bills from her pocket to leave a tip and hurries after Christen until they’re walking side by side, across the hotel lobby… towards the elevator… 

Christen keeps glancing at Tobin as they walk. But she turns away whenever Tobin tries to meet her eyes. 

And there’s a smirk that’s barely there, after Tobin hits the up button and turns to Christen. But there’s something else, too—a restless energy about her as she stands there, with her eyes trained on the elevator floor indicator, and starts chewing her bottom lip.

Tobin catches her eyes as she moves closer, then asks,_ Nervous? _

_ Should I be? _Christen answers.

_ No… But you’re worrying your lip. _

_ Don’t. _

_ Don’t what? _

_ Don’t tell me you could bite my lip for me. _

_ I wasn’t going to, _ Tobin admits before strolling inside the elevator, which had just opened, then turning back to Christen (who follows her), and adding, _ but I could. _

_ You could what? _

Tobin taps her keycard on the reader and presses the button to the fourth floor. _ Bite your lip for you. _

Christen steps closer just as the door closes… “You could…” 

Tobin’s eyes fall on Christen’s lips… And she moves her hand up to cup Christen’s face, with Christen’s hand pressed flat against her chest. And she leans… slowly… just as surely as Christen’s hand travels to her collarbone… up the side of her neck… And they kiss… softly… lips locking together seamlessly… 

And with deep, shaky breaths, they pull back a little, lips still brushing against the other lightly… and then, they kiss again… breathing each other in… seizing and scraping each other’s lips with their teeth… and pressing their bodies further into each other… like they can’t get close enough.

But all too soon, Christen’s lips are gone and Tobin opens her eyes and the elevator opens and they’re at the fourth floor and God… they’re staring at each other like they want to—

But they don’t. 

And with crackling determination and stolen glances and hand-holding and fumbling, they arrive at room 401. And Tobin opens the door. And Christen breezes past Tobin, steps out of her sandals, places the coaster and her keycard on the desk, and walks barefoot across the carpet, towards the glass door, which opens to the balcony and a view of the late-night streets of Venice Beach.

Dim light from the bedside lamps Tobin turns on illuminate the room just enough to still see street lights twinkling from below. And Christen just stands there, waiting, with her back turned and her arms crossed over her chest, as Tobin approaches, discarding her flip flops by the bed, tossing her snapback on the desk, and leisurely unbuttoning her shirt.

She stops an inch behind Christen, with her shirt partially open, breathing in… and out… She moves her hands towards Christen’s thighs… breathing in… and out… She skims her fingertips across Christen’s skin, feather light, just below the hem of Christen’s shorts, breathing in… and out… Christen leans back and turns her head to the side, breathing in… and out… Tobin sweeps Christen’s hair to one side, over her shoulder, breathing in… lips ghosting along the side of Christen’s neck, breathing out… 

Christen shivers.

And her head lolls back as she reaches up to cradle Tobin’s head and Tobin’s touches grow bolder.

She starts stroking Christen’s thighs, up and down, and up and down, moving higher, up her pelvis, then her waist, slipping both hands under her crop top, to her ribs, up the swell of her breasts, soft and… bare.

Tobin groans… with her palms kneading Christen’s breasts and mouth latching on to Christen’s neck, leaving a trail of nips and kisses and licks and bites and marks on Christen’s skin, reaching Christen’s jaw as Christen’s head turns—

And they kiss… ravenously… just as greedily as they kissed inside the elevator. 

They kiss as Christen turns around to face Tobin and presses her body against Tobin’s, arms winding around Tobin’s neck, holding on tight, like she’s not letting go anytime soon. Or ever.

They kiss as Tobin runs her hands up and down Christen’s back, going lower and lower each time, until she’s cupping Christen’s ass and… squeezing. And their moans get muffled by their own mouths.

They kiss like they need it, like it’s breathing, but also like, ‘What is breathing? To hell with breathing.’ They kiss like they’re drinking each other in, so thirsty that they’re stumbling as they stand, swaying lightly on their feet, and moving uncontrollably until Christen’s back hits the glass door and Tobin’s hands move to Christen’s thighs and glide towards Christen’s waist and back… to Christen’s breasts.

Christen moans again.

Then she breaks up their kiss when she lets out a gasp as Tobin rubs her thumbs against her nipples. And her gasp turns into whimpers as Tobin laps and bites into her neck again and finds a spot to suck on that makes her whole body quiver and makes her arms stop clinging. She starts massaging Tobin’s nape and Tobin’s back as Tobin continues to feast on her neck. Then she puts a bit of pressure on Tobin’s shoulder, hinting, urging, ‘Go lower.’

And Tobin does.

She kisses her way down the length of Christen’s neck… to the hollow of her throat… across her collarbones… down the skin exposed by her neckline… on the fabric of her top between Tobin’s hands… to her bare stomach… 

Tobin looks up. Christen meets her gaze. And there's a question in Tobin’s eyes that Christen answers by raising and crossing her arms above her head. And Tobin wastes no time in clutching her crop top by the hem and pulling it up, and kissing more skin while uncovering more skin, then eagerly taking a nipple into her mouth—

“Tobin,” Christen gasps as she arches her back… as they struggle to take her top off and then finally rip her top off… as she threads her fingers through Tobin’s hair and clenches—

Tobin hums.

She hums in pleasure as she swirls her tongue around Christen’s nipple… as she draws it into her mouth and Christen’s breathing goes uneven… as she lavishes attention on Christen’s other breast with her hand, kneading and pinching… as she bites into the softness of Christen’s breast and pulls her nipple between her teeth—

“Tobin,” Christen moans.

She moans in pleasure as she thrusts her hips forward, begging for contact… as Tobin releases her nipple and teases the other with a tongue-flick… as Tobin sucks on it and repeats all ministrations… as Tobin grips her waist, then plays with the waistband of her shorts.

“Tobin,” Christen pleads when their eyes meet.

And they hold each other’s gaze as Tobin continues to savor Christen’s breast, and slides her hands around the small of Christen’s back, and slips her fingers beneath the waistband of Christen’s shorts, finding smooth and supple skin and—nothing else.

Tobin moans… swiping her tongue over Christen’s breast and grazing it with her teeth, then skimming her lips down to Christen’s navel, peeling off Christen’s shorts with both hands, trailing after it with her mouth, kissing Christen’s hips, and Christen’s groin, and the inside of Christen’s thigh. And Tobin is on her knees kissing Christen’s knee, removing Christen’s shorts, kissing Christen’s other knee, up Christen’s other thigh, brushing the tip of her nose against the apex of Christen’s legs, then licking—

“Tobin—” Christen’s breath hitches as she fondles her breasts and Tobin’s tongue flicks against her clit… as she grabs Tobin by the hair with one hand and slams her other hand against the glass door… as her hips move of their own accord and grind against Tobin’s mouth… as Tobin starts drawing circles with her tongue and Christen starts panting—heaving and puffing—head tilting back and mouth hanging open—breathing heavily and rapidly—legs shaking and stomach twitching—back sliding down the glass door bit by bit—Tobin holding her thighs—gasping and moaning—louder and louder—“I’m coming, I’m coming—Tobin!”

Tobin gazes up at Christen’s face… breathless… as she comes… 

And with her eyes closed and her body still quivering, Christen cups Tobin’s chin and pulls her up. And Tobin obeys, planting kisses along the way, from her midriff, to her chest, to her neck, to her lips—And they kiss… as Christen wraps one arm around Tobin’s shoulders and clutches her neckline with the other… as Tobin lifts Christen by her thighs, wraps her legs around her waist, then pivots to the bed.

She takes one step and Christen has both arms around her shoulders. Another step and Christen abandons her lips and goes for her neck. Another step and she lays Christen across the bed, then pulls away, propping herself up on her elbows and locking eyes with Christen, who finally notices her unbuttoned shirt, immediately grabs her collar, and promptly pulls her down—And they kiss, and they kiss, and they kiss… with Christen slowly sitting up, then kneeling on the edge of the bed, sliding Tobin’s shirt off one shoulder, and then the other… with Tobin letting it fall off her arms as she stands, then helping Christen remove her bra…

It slips off Tobin’s wrist as Christen pulls away, raking her eyes and her nails over Tobin’s bare torso—from her shoulders… to her abs… 

Tobin smirks. And so does Christen before wiping the smirk off her face with kisses on her lips… her neck… her collarbone… the middle of her chest… her breast… her other breast… her abs, her abs, her abs—flexing with every touch of Christen’s tongue and lips and fingertips—drifting lower and lower and lower and reaching the waistband of her jeans.

Christen looks up—tongue curling out of her mouth as she licks at Tobin’s waist—with a question in her eyes. Tobin answers with a whimper. And Christen hastens to unbutton and unzip her jeans and slide it down her legs, along with her underwear—with Tobin helping, shedding the last two garments, then kicking them off.

They catch each other’s eyes—Then Tobin lunges at Christen—And they kiss again, and again, and again… with Christen pulling Tobin closer and Tobin cradling Christen’s face with both hands, gradually bending her knees… until she’s kneeling on the floor.

Then their lips part… And Tobin slides her hands along Christen’s arms, then holds one of her hands while searching under the bed.

Christen looks at her in wonder, with a hint of a smile, jaw dropping a little, as she pulls out a box and opens it to show Christen the new toy—a blue, J-shaped, double-ended dildo.

She raises her eyebrows—And Christen nods right away, so eager that when Tobin picks it up with a small bottle of lube, Christen takes it from her as soon as it comes within reach.

“Guide me,” Christen says, as she holds it at the base.

And Tobin doesn’t take her eyes off her as she stands, squeezing lube into her right hand, then stroking the shorter end of the toy, before applying it on herself… 

Christen wets her lips… and watches with rapt attention as Tobin lifts her right foot onto the bed and drops the bottle right next to Christen, then covers Christen’s hand with her own and steers the wearer’s bulb between her legs… 

They ease it in… 

Christen leans closer… 

And Tobin’s eyes close as she moans… with Christen languidly swiping her tongue over her nipple and both of them slowly pushing the toy further… and further… and further inside her… 

And with a deep… long exhale… she opens her eyes… and watches… as they let go of the toy… as Christen picks up the bottle of lube, squirts a dollop on the longer shaft, protruding out of Tobin, and starts stroking it gently… moving her hand up and down repeatedly… 

Their gazes meet again… 

Christen tilts her head up… Tobin leans down… 

And they kiss… with their arms wrapped around each other and Christen taking her time pulling Tobin down to the bed… until she’s lying on her back with Tobin on top… 

And they kiss… with their bodies flushed against each other, the toy pressed between them, and Tobin accidentally rubbing it against Christen’s clit—

Christen gasps as they kiss… and the reason registers in Tobin’s mind so gloriously that she props herself up on her elbows, gazes down between their bodies, and starts rubbing the toy deliberately against the sensitive nub before looking back at Christen, who rewards her with a lip bite so alluring she can’t help but moan… 

And she can’t help but pause… as Christen deliciously spreads her legs wide open… 

And Tobin’s mouth hangs open… as she looks at Christen with a question in her eyes and Christen answers with an almost imperceptible nod. So Tobin leans in for another kiss on Christen’s lips… on Christen’s neck… on Christen’s chest… before sitting on her heels… and grasping the toy… and teasing Christen’s opening with the tip—Christen’s stomach twitches—And they share a look that’s sultry and tender all at once. 

“Go slow…” 

Tobin nods… and holds her breath as she lines up the toy… then exhales as she pushes it in… carefully… propping herself up on one arm… adjusting her hips as she goes… inching forward bit by bit… until it’s almost all the way in… 

She turns to Christen, who holds her waist and pulls her closer—taking the toy deeper—as deep as it can go—And they both groan… diving for each other’s lips at the same time… and cleaving to each other as they kiss, with Christen’s legs wrapping around Tobin’s back.

And Tobin starts rocking her hips as they kiss… undulating gently… and steadily… moving forward, and backward, and forward, and backward, and faster, and faster, and fast—And the toy slips out of Tobin, who smiles sheepishly at Christen.

But Christen kisses her again, then says, “Lie down.” 

And Tobin quickly nods in assent, picks up the toy, and lies on her back, with Christen kneeling beside her… Christen sliding the wearer’s bulb back inside her… Christen putting her legs together—her face lighting up in understanding… Christen placing her knees on either side of her hips, then grabbing the shaft, and—

_ Wait, _Tobin signs, before sitting up and awkwardly folding her legs to one side, then sitting on her heels again.

“Tobin—”

_ Trust me. _

And Christen nods before lowering herself gingerly onto the toy… and taking it all in… and groaning so hard Tobin can feel it.

_ Don’t move yet, _Tobin requests, before reaching behind herself with one hand, adjusting the toy, and—

“Oh, god, it vibrates?”

Tobin nods, open-mouthed and whimpering, then asks,_ Feels good? _

“So good,” Christen moans, then kisses Tobin again, all tongue and teeth and fervid lips—And Tobin kisses back with all her heart… with ragged breaths… with roaming hands… 

She starts massaging Christen’s ass. And Christen starts rolling her hips. And they both start moaning in short and rhythmic bursts. 

A roll of the hips—A moan—And Tobin lays back slowly but surely, bringing Christen down along with her… Another roll—A moan—And Tobin maneuvers resolutely under Christen, then stretches her legs… Another roll—A moan—And Tobin clamps her legs together, securing the toy between her thighs… A roll—A moan—And she moves her hands up to grab Christen’s waist, lifts her just a bit higher, and starts thrusting her hips upwards, gradually picking up speed. And their moans start coming in pants.

“Babe. Don’t stop.”

And Tobin grunts… as she wraps her arms tightly around Christen’s back, with her hips moving up and down relentlessly, her ass bouncing and thumping against the bed, and her thighs slapping persistently against Christen’s thighs.

“Fuck.”

Christen’s eyes close, panting, as she tries kissing Tobin’s lips again and fails… as she palms Tobin’s breasts and squeezes hard… as she slides her hands upwards and clings to Tobin’s neck… as she drops her forehead onto Tobin’s shoulder and meets Tobin’s thrusts with her own—moving in sync—keeping pace with each other—matching each other—thrust for thrust—with sweat trickling down their foreheads, their arms, their backs, their thighs—and Christen’s grip growing tighter and tighter and bruising the nape of Tobin’s neck—nails digging into Tobin’s skin—And they keep pounding and pounding and pounding until Christen’s movements go out of sync—and her body starts shaking—her shoulders start trembling—and her hands start clawing at the sheets as she sinks her teeth into Tobin’s shoulder—And then she cries out— 

—in ecstasy—with her head thrown back, her eyes shut tight, and her body going rigid for a split second, before falling limply on top of Tobin, who is chasing her own release—still grinding her hips with vigor and purpose and wanton abandon—with Christen still twitching and moaning above her—And Tobin starts quivering—with her teeth clenched, her eyebrows furrowed, and her whole body pulsing and throbbing—going taut—in a heartbeat—groaning so loud—as she comes… 

And then they lay there… panting… until Christen weakly taps Tobin’s shoulder and Tobin answers with a grunt before reaching for the toy… and pulling it out… then tossing it aside, still vibrating.

And they just lay there… panting… holding each other… catching their breaths… and waiting… for their heartbeats to slow down… 

Then Christen moves… planting a kiss on Tobin’s shoulder… and another one on Tobin’s neck… before propping herself up on her elbows and staring at Tobin’s face with her eyes glazed over.

Tobin stares back with eyes equally glazed over.

And they break into smiles… before leaning in for a kiss… then staring at each other again… 

Then Christen smirks. “Belated happy birthday to me.”

And they burst into giggles—beaming with joy as they kiss, and giggle, and kiss, and giggle, and kiss, and—

“Super belated happy first year anniversary, babe—Gosh, what a mouthful.”

And they laugh so hard their shoulders start shaking and their eyes are crinkling with glee.

“Happy new year, my love.”

And they grin as they kiss some more.

“Let’s do this again.”

*

They do it again.

It’s almost 10pm two nights later when the coast is clear at the Press household and Tobin goes out the front door and waits at the doorstep with the door closed, wearing her full delivery uniform and her hair up in a neat ponytail, holding her phone in her right hand and a package in her left, which seems to be taped back together and has a shipping label with her name on it and the Press’ address in Palos Verdes Estates.

She strikes a pose—with her head turned to the left, her body facing the door, and the package resting on her hip—when the door opens. Then she turns her head slowly… for dramatic effect… and sets her eyes on Christen, coming out the door, wearing a pair of sinfully short athletic shorts, a form-fitting tank top with no bra, and her hair up in a tight bun.

Tobin looks down at her phone and taps on it with her thumb, then a robotic female voice says, “Package for… Christen… Press.”

“That’s me,” Christen says, before giving her a coy smile.

And Tobin offers a charming one in return as she hands over the package.

“Oh.” Christen looks disappointed as she takes it. “I was hoping _ you _were the package.”

Tobin’s eyes widen a little before she quickly types on her phone to say, “Check… me out… and I will… deliver.” 

Christen hungrily rakes her eyes over Tobin’s body, from her face to her shoes, then back again. “Done.”

And they stare at each other with pursed lips, trying really hard not to crack up.

Then Christen adds, “I could really use your help in putting together this new… accessory… How do you feel about giving a… product demo?”

Tobin types again, then smirks. “I am… all about… customer… satisfaction.”

And Christen smirks back.

So now they’re naked in Christen’s bed, with tousled hair, Tobin lying on Christen’s back, and their new toy discarded on the floor, along with a newly purchased harness.

Christen stirs when their breathing evens out. And Tobin moves to the side as Christen rolls on her side. Then their eyes meet. And they start laughing as they kiss… 

“You’ve really been working out, haven’t you?” Christen asks, with a teasing smile.

And Tobin playfully wiggles her brows, with a self-satisfied smirk.

And they laugh again before they kiss… and Christen sighs… 

She cups Tobin’s face, with a tender look on her face, and starts caressing Tobin’s cheek with her thumb… 

_ What? _Tobin asks.

“Nothing…” 

_ Doesn’t seem like nothing. _

Christen kisses her again.

_ Baby, tell me, _Tobin requests.

And Christen sighs again before pouting and signing, _ I missed you for almost a month and now I’ll have to miss you again for three weeks. _

_ You know, we still haven’t talked about Brazil. _

_ What’s there to talk about? We lost the tournament. _

_ You scored four goals in one game. _

_ We almost didn’t make it back home for Christmas. _

_ But you did. _

_ Have I mentioned I missed you? _

Tobin laughs, then kisses Christen again. _ I missed you too, so much, my love. Moving into our new home just didn’t feel… complete… without you. _

_ I’m sorry I couldn’t be there to help. _

_ It’s okay. _

_ Did you get the couch and the bed frame we wanted? _

_ Yes, love. _

_ So we won’t be sleeping on a mattress on the floor? _

_ We won’t be, _Tobin grins cheekily.

Christen gapes in shock, _ You’re still sleeping on the floor?! _

_ I’ll have three weeks to set up the bed. _

_ And you still haven’t mounted the TV on the wall, have you? _

_ But I’ve mounted you, _Tobin snickers.

Christen rolls her eyes.

_ I’ll have three weeks! _

Christen shakes her head then scoffs, _ You seem totally fine not being with me for three weeks. _

_ Hey… none of that, _ Tobin frowns. _ I know how important this training camp is and how important this year is. I’m gonna miss you so damn much. But you’ll be home before we know it. _

*

She does get home before they know it.

It’s past 11pm three weeks later in Portland when Tobin’s newly-installed signal light turns on and Tobin rushes from the couch to the door, which opens before she gets there.

Then Christen appears, swiftly pulling out her key from the knob, excitedly asking, “Did it work? I rang the bell!”

Tobin nods, beaming, then braces herself as Christen kicks the door closed after pulling her luggage inside and launches her whole body at Tobin, who catches her and carries her to bed as they kiss.

And they kiss… like two idiots in love, who haven’t seen each other for a while, kiss… 

A rolling-in-bed, holding-each-other-tight, making-lots-of-steamy-noises levels of kiss… The kind that literally takes their breath away and forces them to pull back and pause… and gaze at each other lovingly… 

_ Welcome home, baby, _Tobin signs, still beaming.

_ I’m so happy to be home, my love, _Christen replies, beaming back, before letting out a yawn. (She flew straight to Portland after her last day of camp.)

Tobin asks, _ Sleep? _

Christen nods, with a sorry but hopeful expression on her face._ Naked? _

Tobin nods eagerly, with a smile.

_ With boob-touching, _Christen adds.

_ I expect nothing less. _

_ I promise I’ll make it up to you tomorrow morning. _

_ You better. _

*

Tobin wakes up the next morning feeling Christen moving away from her. And when she opens her eyes, she sees Christen reaching for something on the nightstand, before turning back to her. _ What time is it? _Tobin asks, squinting.

_ It’s 6:30, _ Christen answers grumpily, before leaning in for a kiss and lying sideways on the bed again, facing Tobin. _ And that was your phone. You didn’t get the vibrator for the bed, did you? _

_ But I did get a vibrator for the bed. _Tobin smiles mischievously.

Christen slaps her arm. _ Not what I meant. _

Tobin chuckles._ Yes, yes, I’m getting all the things. _

_ Baby, I’m serious. _

_ I know, I know. So am I. _ Tobin tries to appease her with a kiss. _ I’ll get it, I promise. _

_ Tobin— _

_ I know you’re concerned about my safety when you’re not here, my love. And I can show you the reminder I set for it later. But can we channel your energy into something more worthwhile? _

_ Like what? _

Tobin removes the sheet off her body and gestures at her nakedness with both hands.

And Christen laughs so hard that all traces of her grumpiness disappear. And she (still) looks absolutely smitten as she straddles Tobin’s waist and starts kissing down Tobin’s body—from her lips… to her crotch… 

And by 7am, they’re both basking in the afterglow of their orgasms and ready to get out of bed.

They freshen up in the bathroom together, with Tobin proudly showing the corner shelf she installed by the sink, with all the toiletries she bought, for Christen, who beams and kisses her gratefully.

Then they pray together… and meditate on the couch together… before Tobin brings out the blender for Christen, brews coffee, and prepares the ingredients for pancakes.

They work quietly for a while… with Christen making whatever smoothie concoction she is making and Tobin making pancakes. 

But their gazes inevitably drift towards each other, faces lighting up the moment they catch each other’s eyes.

_ What? _Christen asks, smiling.

_ I’m just so happy you’re home, _ Tobin answers, smiling just as wide. _ Hi, home. _

Christen looks like she falls in love all over again as she closes the distance between them and gives Tobin a long and fervent kiss… 

Their eyes flutter open.

Then Christen says, “Don’t burn my pancakes, babe. I want them nice and fluffy.”

_ Nice and fluffy. Just like how I feel right now. _

Christen sticks out her tongue at Tobin, who does the same thing.

_ I can’t wait to be married to you, _ Tobin adds. _ That way, I’ll know for sure you’ll be bossing me around forever. _

_ Yeah, yeah, get excited. _

And they burst into laughter. 

They spend the entirety of breakfast making each other laugh, holding each other’s hands, updating each other on things they may have missed the past few days, and kissing… constantly… 

Even at 8:25am, when Tobin is already dressed for work, with her backpack slung over her shoulders, they’re still kissing—with Christen holding Tobin’s waist and Tobin cupping Christen’s face with both hands, slowly walking her backwards until her ass hits the shelf opposite their bed—making things fall over.

They break apart—giggling, before resting their foreheads against each other and sighing… and giving each other more pecks on the lips… 

Then Tobin asks, _ Do you have anything planned for the rest of the day, baby? _

_ Surprisingly, no, _ Christen replies, _ apart from my morning exercises and unpacking. I’m sure I’ll think of something. _

Tobin narrows her eyes, _ You’ll organize and rearrange our stuff, won’t you? _

_ You know me so well, _Christen chuckles, before looking down at the object that hit the back of her thigh when she backed into the shelf—She gasps, then turns to Tobin again, beaming. “Babe… It’s my painting!”

Tobin beams back and nods.

Christen adorably bites her lower lip.

_ You’ve just thought of something to do, haven’t you? _

_ Maybe. _

Tobin laughs, _ I love you. _

_ I love you. _Christen leans in for another heartfelt kiss… “I love you, I love you, I love you.”

*

Tobin can’t stop smiling when she gets to work. And Sylvia can’t help but look amused during their one-on-one meeting because Tobin is just… glowing.

It’s nearly 9:30am when they wrap up and Tobin musters the courage to work up to a big ask for Sylvia. She types on her phone, then shows her message, _ Thanks for approving my leave in February, boss. _

Sylvia nods, with a smile. “It’s fine. It’s only for a few days.”

Tobin types again and takes a deep breath…_ Any chance I could go on leave for a month in June? _

“A month? What for?”

_ …The Women’s World Cup in Canada. _

“Didn’t realize you were such a huge fan—Wait, you’re not just a fan, are you?”

Tobin weighs her options, then types…_ Can we keep it low key? _

Sylvia looks intrigued as she nods.

_ …My girlfriend is on the national team. _

“Really? Who?”

_ …Christen Press _

Sylvia quickly types on her laptop. “Oh, wow… Tobin, she’s gorgeous.”

Tobin beams and nods in agreement.

“Is she in the NWSL?” Sylvia asks as she clicks on her laptop. “Oh. She plays for Chicago… Okay… well, can I tell the chief you’re dating a player in the league?”

Tobin shrugs and nods.

“I need to consult her but… I don’t see why you can’t continue writing match reports involving… Christen’s team… They’re… objective… enough…” Sylvia trails off as if another thought occurred to her, before breaking into a smile. “Tell you what, I’ll talk to Jamie and the chief… and I’ll propose that you cover the national team’s World Cup matches and write a couple of feature articles while you’re there.”

Tobin’s eyes widen in surprise—and hope.

“I can’t promise you anything… but if they agree to it, you do realize you can’t write a feature on Christen, right?”

Tobin nods again.

“Or any controversial topics like the ongoing turf war with FIFA… or the rumblings about pay disputes. You’re too close to the subject… You’ll have to come up with something else.”

_ …How about a feature on a retiring player’s legacy, like Abby? _

_ …Or a series on their sports science. _

“Those could work—I’m sure you’ll come up with good stuff.”

*

“You got this, babe,” Christen smirks. “I believe in you.”

It’s 10:15am five days later and they’re about to start a slow flow vinyasa yoga class that Tobin didn’t think she’d sign up for when she brought Christen to this cool bouldering gym after their brunch date. Yet here she is, sitting cross-legged on a yoga mat behind Christen, which is certainly not her idea of fun on a Saturday. But Christen leaves for France in two days and she wants Christen to enjoy her time in Portland so she can only fake grumble._ You’re lucky you’re cute. _

_ You’re lucky I’m cute! _Christen grins.

_ This better earn me some hot new yoga poses later. _

Christen laughs._ And what do I get once I try bouldering with you? _

Tobin thinks for a second before smirking,_ I won’t introduce you tomorrow. _

*

She grins from ear to ear as Christen walks one step ahead of her as they enter a new restaurant the next day.

It’s 11:30am and they’re about to have lunch with Tobin’s deaf friends in Portland. Christen is meeting them for the first time. And as expected, they all get up from their seats, beaming in excitement, the moment they spot Christen.

Casey is the first to reach her and immediately pulls her into a hug, which Christen returns, with the same warmth and enthusiasm.

_ It’s so nice to finally meet you! _ Casey signs, before spelling out her name. _ I’m Casey. _

Christen does the same with hers, _ I’m Christen. It’s so nice to finally meet you, too! _

_ Gosh, you’re so pretty! _

Tobin snorts.

And Christen ignores her as she graciously signs, _ Thank you, _before getting pulled into another hug by another friend. And the same thing happens, again and again. 

By the time the appetizers are served, they’ve all complimented Christen and called her attention across the table with_ Hey, pretty girl! _ or _ Hey, pretty braids! _ or _ Hey, pretty C! _

And Tobin zips her lips when Christen turns to her. But her amused expression clearly says, ‘I told you so.’

And Christen can only roll her eyes, shake her head, and smile in disbelief.

Tobin kisses the back of her hand and shrugs with a smile that says, ‘Nothing you can do about it, babe.’

And Christen sighs in resignation, at the thought of forever being stuck… with _ C-pretty. _

*

“That’s her name sign?!” Allie laughs through the screen.

It’s noontime in Portland and dinner time in England when Christen calls Tobin nine days later and the Alexandras clamor to get some face time with Tobin to brag about learning basic signs and the ASL alphabet and to pressure Tobin into revealing their name signs because Christen claims she can’t.

“What? I think my name sign is cute,” Ali says as Christen nods and smiles beside her. “Memes have been made about my bun, you know.”

“True,” Alex laughs, crouching behind her. “What’s mine, Tobs?”

Tobin smiles as she draws a line over the top of her head from temple to temple, with her closed fist forming the letter A.

And Allie laughs harder behind Christen, “Yours isn’t any better!”

“Shut up,” Alex says. “What’s Allie’s?”

Tobin hasn’t even finished signing when Allie yells, “Harry!” then points at Alex, “Ha! Take that, A-headband!”

*

They reunite four days later when Tobin arrives in London to spend the next few days with Christen before she flies out to Sweden to spend time with her Swedish friends, before the whole team travels to Portugal for the Algarve Cup.

It’s a little after 1pm and they find themselves sitting in a cosy cafe, enjoying the closest thing to an authentic fika experience that they can get outside of Sweden.

They order staples like cinnamon buns and classic Swedish cakes with their coffee, but also decadent treats, like moist almond and chocolate sponge fillings soaked with Swedish liqueur, rolled in marzipan and dipped in chocolate, and smooth dark chocolate truffles on almond biscuits.

Tobin almost spills her coffee when her phone vibrates on the table, not expecting to receive any calls or messages, but Christen snatches it up, looks at it, and bursts into giggles.

Tobin finds out why when she gets her phone back from Christen, with a smile and a kiss, and sees the preview of a heart from_ Cinnamon Roll, Too Good For This World… _

*

Never in her wildest dreams did Tobin imagine being here, on this day of all days, on a date, with the woman she knows she’s going to marry, but Christen just made her wildest dreams come true.

It’s 2:30pm on Tobin’s second day in London and she grins at Ashlyn as they stand in the aisle to take photos of Christen, Morgan, and Ali in their seats, all bundled up in their beanies, scarves, and puffy jackets, with the pitch in the background, at Emirates Stadium.

Arsenal is hosting Leicester and Tobin can’t stop looking around her in awe, still in utter disbelief that she gets to watch her favorite team play in person, in the stands, in their home stadium, with Christen. She bounces in jubilation as she goes back to her seat beside Christen, who stares at her with so much love and affection that she kisses her deeply… and gratefully… 

And when they pull away, Christen asks with a smile, _ Happy, my love? _

Tobin nods, offering her widest grin and signing,_ Best. Valentine’s Day. Ever!!! _

*

“Psshhh, we can do so much better than that, Harry,” Allie claims. “Imagine you, me, Press, and Bati watching El Clasico. In Barcelona. It’s the double date to end all double dates!”

It’s 3pm on the third Sunday of March and Tobin and Allie are taking a short break from playing Mario Kart for hours, in Allie and Bati’s apartment.

Tobin shows her reply through her phone,_ Sounds like the best thing ever, Harry. But we can’t do that when Chris is back. _

“You’re right, you’re right… But you can bet your cute butt we’ll make El Clasico happen… like, next year or something.”

Tobin laughs and nods. She’s been humoring Allie all week since Allie came back with a broken heart, after being told by the national team coach that she was, unfortunately, not in their World Cup plans, the day after they won the Algarve Cup (where Christen scored the winning goal in the finals). 

Which is why she’s back in Portland earlier for pre-season, but Kling and Christen are in LA for World Cup photoshoots and stuff, and Tobin is playing Mario Kart with her and talking about double dates.

Allie gasps, tapping Tobin’s thigh. “How about we go on a wine-tasting tour in Willamette Valley?”

Tobin’s face lights up as she types… _ I love their wine! _

And Allie squeals, bouncing in her seat, hugging Tobin around the shoulders, with a kiss on the cheek, before focusing on her phone to start her search and Tobin puts her phone down to grab a controller.

It doesn’t take long before Allie exclaims, “Shut. Up!”

_ What? _Tobin asks in sign.

“Can you believe there’s wine tasting _ with _goat yoga?”

_ What?! _

“I know! It’s freakin’ brilliant.”

_ No! _

“What do you mean, no? You don’t think there’ll be enough goats for all of us?”

_ No! _

“Well, then, I guess we’ll just have to share, Harry.”

_ Not what I meant! _

“I didn’t get that, but, fine, you _ and Press _ will share a goat.”

_ No! No! _

“Okay! You don’t want to share. I can see why. They can climb on your back when you plank. Look!”

Tobin groans.

*

“Honey, I’m home!” Christen beams as she walks through the door.

It’s 4:24pm on the last day of April, Tobin has just arrived in Chicago for a weekend visit, before Christen travels for the World Cup send-off series, and she’s scowling on the couch. _ Don’t ‘honey’ me. _

“What?” _ What did I do? _Christen asks, rushing towards Tobin.

_ As if you don’t know. _Tobin crosses her arms over her chest, pouting really hard.

Christen calmly sits beside her, glances at the laptop on the table, then asks, _ You’ve seen my watch history, haven’t you? _

_ I can’t believe you watched Arsenal versus Liverpool without me! _

Christen smothers a smile and schools her expression when she signs, _ I’m sorry. _

Tobin crosses her arms again and gives her the stink eye.

_ It won’t happen again. I promise. _

Tobin huffs in annoyance.

Christen gently strokes her thigh… “Babe…” Tobin’s glare doesn’t soften but she doesn’t pull away either… _ Sweetheart… _ Christen leans in to kiss her softly on one cheek… _ Love of my life… _ then the other cheek as she straddles her… _ Mother of my children… _ Tobin’s breath hitches and Christen kisses her on the lips… _ Will you be mad at me all day? _

Tobin hesitates, then signs,_ Yes. _

Christen pouts, with sad puppy eyes.

Tobin backtracks, _ Okay, maybe not all day. _

_ How much longer? _

_ Give me ten minutes. _

_ Title of our sex tape. _

Tobin rolls her eyes as Christen smirks.

_ Can I keep kissing you for those ten minutes? I’ve missed you so much. _

Tobin sighs… and her expression softens as she nods… then tilts her head up ever so slightly… inviting Christen in.

And Christen doesn’t hesitate to move closer… and capture Tobin’s lips with her own… with Tobin kissing her back just as tenderly… reverently… yearningly… 

Then Christen pulls away, just a little… to kiss the corner of Tobin’s lips… Tobin’s jaw… the back of Tobin’s ear… while wrapping her arms around Tobin’s shoulders and holding her tight. And Tobin melts in her arms… wrapping both arms around her back, kissing her shoulder… her neck… the back of her ear… And they both sigh… with neither one of them moving for a while… content to just sit there, with their eyes closed, wrapped in each other’s arms, breathing each other in… 

…until Tobin taps Christen softly on the shoulder and Christen pulls back to talk to her. “Yes, my love?”

_ Did you really mean what you said? _

“Yes.”

Tobin (finally) smiles a soft smile._ You don’t even know which one I meant. _

“But I meant everything I said.”

_ That’s fair. _

“What’s on your mind, my love?”

Tobin takes a deep breath and sighs._ We’ve joked about it before… and I know we both want it but… do you… do you really see us raising kids together? _

Christen smiles just as softly, “I do…”

_ Even if I’m deaf? _

_ Our kids are going to be bilingual at the very least. _

_ Honey, I’m serious. _

_ So am I. Did you know that using sign language has proven to be beneficial for kids of all ages? And babies can start learning as early as sixth months! _

_ Chris. _

Christen beams and gives Tobin a peck on the lips. _ I love you. I have no doubt in my mind that you’d be a wonderful parent. And I would really, really, really, really love to have kids with you. _

_ I love you. _ Tobin smiles blissfully and gives Christen a peck on the lips. _ Do you… want to adopt? _

_ It’s a route we can take. There are so many kids who need loving homes. _

Tobin nods. _ But can we also have a mini-Christen? _

_ And a mini-Tobin? _

_ That depends. Will you carry our babies? _

_ I might. Do you want to? _

_ I’m not sure. _

_ Okay. I’ve been told I have child-bearing hips. _

_ You have sexy, sexy hips. _

_ I hope you remember that after I give birth. _

Tobin suddenly gasps—face bursting with pure delight.

“What?”

_ Your boobs will—! _

“Tobin!”

*

Tobin laughs boisterously at Christen’s eye roll—She made a poster especially for this occasion that says,_ ‘ _ ** _Christen Press, It’s my birthday today!_ ** _ ’ _ in big, bold letters, with a much smaller print added at the bottom, asking, _ ‘ _ ** _Can I have you_ ** _ r jersey?’ _

It’s 5:15pm and they’re back in Red Bull Arena for the last friendly in the send-off series, where Tobin finally got to watch the national team play for the first time in person, on her birthday, surrounded by her family, the Press Pack, and Lauren.

Christen steps in front of the poster, which Tobin holds over the railing, and signs at the bottom, wearing an amused smile, taking longer than usual, before folding the poster in two and holding out her left hand for Tobin to take. And they squeeze each other’s hands, beaming, before Tobin stands aside so that the others can greet Christen in turn.

“See you in a bit,” Christen says and they watch her move along to sign another jersey, lingering where they are to greet the rest of the team.

Tobin gets fist bumps, high fives, and air kisses from everyone and finger guns from… someone, then looks at the poster and laughs at Christen’s note.

_ ‘You can have me in my birthday suit later <3’ _

At half past 6pm, they’ve all congregated in a nearby bar and grill to celebrate Tobin’s birthday and Tobin and Christen are cooing over Tobin’s nephew, Cole, who is sitting on her lap.

Obviously, Christen swoons._ I knew seeing you with him would make me—but this is something else, baby. _

_ Yeah? _Tobin smiles.

_ Yeah, _ Christen nods. _ It won’t happen for a long while, but I can’t wait to have babies with you. _

Tobin smirks impishly, _ Wanna try making babies later? _

Christen smirks back._ Well, you know I’m a huge— _

_ “Hey, hey, hey,” _ Perry calls out across the table. _ Cut it out, you two! You’re not the only ones who can sign at this table. _

And the two have the decency to look embarrassed before Christen’s phone lights up on the table.

Tobin turns to Cole to smell him again, and rub his tummy, and kiss his cheek. Then she glances at Christen and does a double take—Christen looks flabbergasted, one hand covering her mouth, as she scrolls through her phone—Tobin nudges her gently with an elbow. 

And Christen’s eyes are filled with mixed emotions when she turns to Tobin again and shows a photo on her phone of the sweet moment they shared in the arena earlier, when they were “shaking hands” and beaming at each other, with undeniable heart eyes.

2,477 likes  
**Elli ** *eyes emoji* Harold…   
littleoblivion: I am DECEASED you have  
MURDERED me THEY'RE IN LESBIANS   
TOGETHER homaygad  
ayeesha: So cute. I love them  
nethog: Do my eyes deceive me or is there really   
something going on between these two?  
Chris: ngl I kind of want them to be a thing  
Hayley128: I can hardly believe Press is into  
women but their eyes say it all  
Cbc: She didn’t ping for me before but OMG I   
can’t stop looking at this photo and how cute   
they are!  
thewisecracker: This is so soft…all this time we’ve   
been pairing Tobin with AM when she’s been with   
CP all along!

The app refreshes for some reason and the latest comment appears.

hcpiii: cute pic!

They instantly raise their heads—“Dad!”

“What?”

“You left a comment on our pic!”

“Am I not supposed to?”

Tobin bursts into laughter.

*

She’s so excited she can’t stop pacing up and down baggage claim while waiting for her luggage.

It’s 7:38pm in Winnipeg, Manitoba, the night before the national team’s first group stage match against Australia, and Tobin suddenly bumps into a solid chunk of a man—She looks up and—_ Nima! _

_ Hi, Tobin! _Nima opens his arms, asking for a hug, which Tobin tentatively gives.

_ What are you doing here? _Tobin asks.

_ I’m your welcome party, _ Nima smiles, _ and under strict instructions to shadow you—be your chaperone and translator for the whole tournament. _

_ Oh, my God. Did Christen bribe you? _

Nima grins,_ A year’s supply of my favorite cupcakes in San Francisco and a promise to take me and my girlfriend skiing at Mt. Hood in December. I hope that’s fine by you. _

Tobin gapes_ —Of course! That’ll be awesome, dude! _

_ Can’t wait! But seriously, I’d be happy to translate for you. Let me know when you need me for your interviews and stuff. _

Tobin hesitates for a second, then—_ Okay. Okay, I will. _

_ Awesome! _

_ Thank you so much. _

*

Tobin fully appreciates the magnitude of the task Christen and the team are facing now.

It’s 8:45pm and the match between the USA and Australia has officially reached the hour mark and her emotions have already been put through the wringer.

Christen is in the starting 11 and so many things have happened just in the first half alone. Pinoe scored a mind-blowing long range goal past three defenders after pirouetting beautifully outside the box to find space in the 12th minute, Christen fouled a player near the sidelines and escaped a yellow card, Abby uncharacteristically missed two headers, and goalkeeper Hope Solo made two incredible saves. But Australia tied the game.

Now they’re making another run for it, with their star player, Kerr, racing towards the box and Becky hot on her heels—Then Kerr takes a shot but Becky slides in just in time for the ball to hit her shin and go out of bounds… 

But Australia’s corner kick comes to nothing and Hope punts the ball quickly to Pinoe, who releases the ball to Sydney, who starts sprinting down the left flank, jostling against a defender, then makes a last-minute cross—The ball floats straight to Christen, who shoots with her right foot and—Goal! 

Goal, goal, goal, goal! The crowd goes wild—the Press Pack goes wild—Tobin goes wild! 

And Christen runs joyously towards midfield with her arms outstretched and jumps into the waiting arms of the nearest teammate, before getting crushed in a group hug by everyone else, then extricating herself to rush to Sydney and tackling her with a hug.

Tobin and the Press Pack are still screaming. The crowd is still screaming. And Tobin can’t distinguish between her pounding heart and the shaking stadium anymore. She has eyes only for Christen, who jogs towards midfield for the restart and, to the crowd, it might seem as if she simply taps her closed fist from one corner of her lips to the other and kisses her thumb, before pointing to the stands. But Tobin knows better—knows that Christen signs her name and kisses the letter T.

And with a smile that can brighten the whole stadium, Tobin stands on her seat and raises her left hand as high as it can go, signing a one-handed, _ I love you. _

  
  


***

  
  


_ How does it feel to be a world champion, my love? _Tobin asks, beaming.

It’s past 9pm a month later and they’re lying naked in their bed, in their cozy apartment, in downtown Portland.

_ It’s indescribable, my love, _ Christen answers, beaming back. _ I still can’t believe it. _

_ But are you happy? _

_ So happy, _ Christen nods, _ it’s like you showed up at my doorstep all over again. _

And they both smile even wider… as they kiss… 

Christen scores again that night. 

As far as Tobin is concerned, she can score when she wants.

  
  


***


End file.
